Chapter 14 #2
She knew without a doubt that she was in love with him and that he at least cared for her deeply, as deeply as a man like him was capable of.
Haley had no delusions about what kind of man Jason had been in the past. He’d never had a serious relationship and had never cared for any woman he’d been with.
Although she knew that he was a good man and she loved being with him, she wasn’t one of those delusional women who thought that she could change a man.
Jason could very well be the person to get her to break her rule because she knew without a doubt that he would never marry her.
He might be able to handle an exclusive relationship with her, but for how long?
She knew that sooner or later he’d get bored and move on to the next girl.
It would hurt like hell, but she knew that it was coming.
So, that left her with a very important decision to make.
Did she take a chance and give herself to him, hoping her heart wouldn’t completely shatter when he moved on, or keep it at the physical level that she was comfortable with?
The only thing stopping her was the regret that she knew she would feel a year from now when another woman came screaming his name in the middle of the night.
She watched as Jason finished dressing. He spent the entire time torn between scowling at her and looking longingly towards the stack of waffles, toast, eggs, bacon, and sausage on her plate.
Of course, she’d cooked this for him, and he knew it on some level, but this was Jason and he took his food seriously.
Too seriously, but that was a job for Dr. Phil to help him work through, not her.
When he finished dressing, he threw his bag over his shoulder, grabbed the bottle of syrup and soaked the waffles. Then, he grabbed a fork and the plate and headed for the door, leaving her to roll her eyes as she followed him.
While she drove, they ate. For every two bites he took, he gave her one, which worked for her since it didn’t take much to make her full.
Secretly, she loved it when they did things like this, especially when he took care of her.
It was so sweet. He made sure that she was given the best piece of bacon or bite of sausage and always made sure to double-dip her bite of waffle into the syrup, knowing how much she liked it.
By the time they pulled into the staff parking lot, they’d finished eating and the plate was on the backseat, sitting on the large beach towel she put back there for times like this.
They sat there for a moment and watched as buses and cars drove up and parked in front of the school.
It occurred to her that she was suddenly nervous.
After last night, she’d thought it would be awkward first thing this morning, another reason she got up early.
Instead, they’d jumped right into their normal morning routine.
Now that the food was gone and they were sitting here, she was really nervous.
Did he regret what they did? Was she about to get the speech that he didn’t want anything serious? Would he get pissed when he found out that she wouldn’t sleep with him like several men before him had? Damn it! What earth-shattering thing would he say?
“You’ve got syrup on your lip.”
Okay, not exactly life-altering.
She licked her lip. “Is it gone?”
“No.”
She wiped her mouth with her fingers. “How about now?”
“I see I’m going to have to handle this,” Jason said as he leaned in quickly and brushed his lips against hers. She sucked in a breath as he ran his tongue over her bottom lip.
“So sweet, my little grasshopper,” he whispered against her lips. He brushed his lips against hers again. “I know why you left the bed early this morning and why you made sure that I barely had enough time to get ready for work.”
He pressed another kiss to her lips as he took her hand into his.
“I’m sorry for being a jerk last night and almost making the biggest mistake of my life.
I was afraid of hurting you. I know what I am, and I also know that you deserve a guy that can spoil you rotten and take you to all the nice places that you deserve. I-”
“Jason, I don’t care about those things,” she said softly.
He shook his head stubbornly. “It doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve them, but if you give me a chance to make up for my past stupidity, and I’m not just talking about with you, I promise that I will do my best to make you happy.”
“Jason-”
“I want to try this. You and me, I mean. I know I’ll most likely fuck up along the way and that you’ll want to wring my neck, but I want to try. I’ll do my best not to hurt you.”
Haley smiled, knowing that was the best she could hope for from him.
She appreciated his honesty and knew that if they were going to try to make this work, then she would have to be honest with him, at least about the extent of their relationship.
He might not like being with a woman when sex wasn’t an option.
She gave his hand a small squeeze. “Jason, if we’re going to try this, then I’d like to take things slow.” He frowned. “What I mean, is nothing beyond the level we were at last night.” She worried her bottom lip between her teeth. “What I mean is no actual sex.”
He narrowed his eyes on her. “But you’ll still sleep with me naked and let me do a hundred other naughty things to you?” he asked in a serious tone.
“Yes.”
He brushed his lips against hers again and moved back a few inches to look into her eyes. “And you’ll still cook for me and call me Master?”
Her lips twitched. “Yes, to the cooking and not a chance in hell for the other.”
He sighed wearily. “Fine, how about Lord and Master?”
“Uh...no.”
“God?”
“Nope.”
“My liege?”
“Wait...no.”
He gave her one of his lopsided smiles. “I’ll wear you down, eventually.”
She wasn’t so sure he would stick around long enough to make good on that promise, but for the chance to be with him even for a short time, she was willing to risk it.