Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
Shiloh
I might have had one drink too many tonight. In my defense, Aspen just kept refilling my glass. How was I supposed to say no to him? He’s my best friend!
Oh my gods, I have a best friend. When the fuck did that happen?
I turn in my seat, staring over at Kei as he drives. He looks over at me, reaching over and setting a hand on my thigh. I shiver at the simple touch, my chest bursting with affection.
“Baby?”
Kei raises his brow at me. “Yes?”
“Can we get ice cream? Pretty please with suga on top?”
Kei snorts but turns on his blinker to make a left turn in the direction of the ice cream shop. I smile as I continue to stare at him.
Kei is so handsome. I just want to grab his face and smoosh it between my hands while squealing loudly. Cuteness aggression is real and I have it towards this man.
“Hey, Kei?” Kei hums softly. “I really like Aspen. Did you know he’s my best friend? I’ve never had a best friend before. Not even before Stevey. Isn’t that crazy?”
“I like Aspen too,” he says back, squeezing my thigh. “You’re kinda chatty when you’re drunk. Did you know that?”
“Am not,” I say with a pout. My head swims but I focus on Kei as best as I can. “You’re cute. I wanna squish your face.”
“Thank you,” he says with a chuckle. “I think you’re cute too.”
“Don’t say that! My boyfriend would be jealous.”
“Would he?”
I tilt my head to the side. “Wait, no! He would be fine with it. He says I’m my own person.
I get to make decisions all on my own. No more asking for permission!
My boyfriend is the best. I’m like super in love with him but don’t tell him that or it’ll go straight to his head.
His head is big enough as it is, thank you very much!
He’s way better than Stevey. Have you ever met Stevey? ”
Kei makes a little noise at the back of his throat. “I’ve never met Stevey. He sounds like a jackass.”
“He was,” I say seriously, nodding my head.
I curl up in my seat, turning fully in Kei’s direction.
“He said he was going to mate with me. I dropped out of college and moved in with him when he asked. I had to quit my job too. He promised he would take care of me. I was completely dependent on him and then one day, he threw me away like I was garbage. Turns out, I wasn’t his only partner. ”
Kei growls, his hands so tight against my thigh it almost hurts. It’s comforting to know someone cares enough to get mad on my behalf.
“Shiloh,” Kei says once he’s parked the car. He turns towards me, holding my face in his hands. “You don’t have to talk about this right now, okay? I’m glad you told me, but let’s just focus on the two of us tonight.”
“Okay,” I say softly, leaning into his touch. I close my eyes, warmth surging through my body.
“I care about you so much,” Kei says, barely above a whisper.
His words wash over me. “I want you to be your own person. I want you to be independent. I want you to have everything. You don’t need anyone to take care of you, but I want to be the one to lift you up and help out however I can.
I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. ”
I open my eyes, staring into Kei’s pretty eyes. I smile. “Tell me that in the morning, okay?”
“Okay,” he says, leaning forward and kissing my lips.
I sigh into the kiss. I’ve never felt better. I have a best friend! I have a boyfriend! Nothing could top this.
“Ready to get some ice cream?”
Okay, maybe one thing could top this.
Kei and I get ourselves some ice cream before getting back into his car and driving to my apartment. Kei got himself mint chocolate chip while I got cookie swirl. I can’t stop smiling as we make our way through town.
“Baby?”
“Yes, Shiloh?”
“We should stop for pepperoni pizza. I know that’s your favorite.”
Kei makes a strangled noise at the back of his throat. “You remember that?”
“Of course I remember that. I remember everything about you.”
“I’m not hungry, but thank you for thinking of me.”
I sit back in my seat, content to watch the town pass by my window, the weight of Kei’s hand on my thigh grounding.
I’m finally starting to feel a little more clear-minded by the time we make our way up to my apartment. We sit on my couch, our sides pressed together as we eat our ice cream. I lean my head against his shoulder and I feel him kiss the top of my head.
“Hey, Kei?”
“Yes, Shiloh?”
“Will you sleep with me tonight?”
“Yeah, I’ll sleep with you tonight. But I want to be the big spoon.”
I growl in response. “I want to be the big spoon.”
“Come on. Let me hold you.”
“Needy,” I say and I can feel him laugh.
After our ice cream, Kei makes me drink some water before getting ready for bed.
My head is still in the clouds, but less so than before.
Sitting in the bathroom together, brushing our teeth side by side feels so domestic.
Normally, I would pull away from something like this, but it’s just Kei. Being with him isn’t so scary.
We get into my bed, both of us in shirts and boxers. I let Kei be the big spoon, letting out a content sigh as I feel him against my back.
“Did you know I’m a mouse?”
“A mouse?”
“Mhmm. I’m a mouse and you’re a cat. Seems kinda like destiny I would be trapped by you.”
“Destined to always be chasing after you,” he says against the back of my neck.
“I’ll let you catch me,” I tell him seriously.
“What an honor,” he says, kissing my head. “Go to sleep, Shiloh. We can talk more in the morning.”
“Okay. Good night, baby.”
“Good night.”
I’m warm and safe as I wake up the next morning. The water that Kei made me drink means I don’t wake up hungover. Instead, I’m plagued with the memories of the shit I said last night.
I groan, rubbing at my eyes.
“Morning,” Kei says, kissing my shoulder. “Did you sleep okay? How’s your head?”
“I slept fine,” I murmur, pulling the covers over my face. “Head feels fine. Everything is fine.”
Kei chuckles, wrapping his arm around my middle even tighter. “Are you regretting all the shit you said last night?”
I hum in agreement.
“Would it be okay if I said a few things now that you’re sober?”
“If you must,” I say with an exaggerated sigh.
Kei rubs his nose over my shoulder, breathing me in. I like it when he scents me. I like when he can go without using his pills, when it’s just the two of us. My stomach swoops as it hits me all over again.
I love that he doesn’t push for more than I can give. I love that he’s kind of a dick. I love the way we banter. I love how easy it feels to be with him. I love how our dates are never too serious. I love spending time in his chat. Jesus fucking Christ. I love Kei.
I’m not sure when it happened, but the realization hits me all at once and for the first time, I don’t try to push the feeling away. For once, I embrace it, knowing that it’s safe to love Kei.
“Thank you for telling me that stuff last night,” Kei starts to say and I do my best to ignore the racing of my heart. “I’m glad I know a bit more about Stevey. I’m glad I know more about your past.”
I lick my lips, feeling my heart hammer against my chest. Without looking at Kei, it’s easy to tell him.
“Stevey was older than me. I loved him so much, Kei. He said all the things I wanted to hear. I quit my job to live with him when he asked. I quit college. I stopped talking to my friends and my family because he wanted to be the most important person in my life. Then out of nowhere, he just dumped me. Told me he had more than one guy he was sleeping with. Told me everything was a lie so that he’d have me all to himself. ”
“Fuck, Shiloh,” Kei says softly, tighting his arms around me.
“Things got really bad after that,” I confess, barely above a whisper.
“I went into shock, emotionally but also physically. I went through rejection syndrome and then pining sickness. My body didn’t understand what was going on, just that our mate was leaving us.
My dads chased Stevey out of town and then took care of me until I could be on my own again.
” I wrap my hand around Kei’s wrist. “Some days, I wasn’t sure I would make it out the other side. ”
“Shiloh,” Kei says, his forehead resting against the back of my neck. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I don’t know this Stevey asshole but just know I fucking loathe him.”
I can’t help but snort, feeling just a little bit lighter at having told Kei this big secret.
“I can promise you, without a shadow of a doubt, I am not like him.”
“I know,” I say, cutting him off. I lace our fingers together where it rests against my chest. “You’re nothing like him, Kei.”
“I never want to do anything that makes you think of him. If I ever say or do something that’s upsetting, please tell me. I won’t be upset, I just want to know so I won’t do it again. Okay?”
“Yeah, okay.”
“I care about you so much, Shiloh,” he breathes against my skin. “I don’t know if you’re ready to hear this but umm, I’m in love with you. You don’t have to say it back. You don’t have to do anything differently. Nothing has to change, but I wanted you to know.”
I pull away from Kei. He makes a soft, distressed noise but I ignore him in order to flip myself around. Our faces are so close I could rub our noses together. I stare at him before bringing a hand to his face.
“Kei, I want things to change.”
“How so?”
“I want to be your boyfriend. I want us to be together.” I lick my lips, finding the courage to confess. “I’m in love with you too.” Then I quickly add on, “asshole.”
Kei’s face breaks into a wide grin. He laughs before pulling me into a kiss. I sink into the feeling of it, allowing Kei to hold me as we trade kisses. It starts off slow, encompassing all of our emotions and affections. When my cock fills with blood though, I grow antsy, needing more.