Chapter 20 #4
Roxanne felt glad his anger was aimed at someone besides her. She should have moved to leave, but she felt frozen.
“Brian, let’s go upstairs…” Al put his hand on Brian’s arm, but Brian shrugged it off.
“That’s all right, Al. I was just leaving,” Roxanne said as she saw several media people, including the two that were camped at her house, through the window. They approached the coffee shop. She turned to Laura who noticed them too.
Laura looked as though she was about to be pushed into the deep end of the pool.
Dr. Oki’s ever-calm facade bore a slight frown, though he didn’t move.
Al’s face had alarm written all over it, from his sweat-beaded forehead to the compressed lips.
Roxanne wasn’t even going to guess at what made him most angry.
She turned to Paul Paris. His fists were clenched and he looked like he wanted to finish his fight with Brian right here and now.
She forced herself to turn toward Brian’s face, at the same time as the reporters came through the coffee shop door. Brian’s eyes were on her, flashing with emotion like she’d never seen.
***
Dr. Oki grabbed Paul’s arm, mumbling something about a consultation up in his office and started to lead him around some tables toward the door. Laura grabbed Roxanne.
“Let’s go,” she said.
“Wait a minute,” Brian said to her, the anger gone from his voice. Roxanne’s eyes snapped around to meet his for a split second. But she would never know what he was going to say.
“Mr. Dennis…” The reporter was on him with a microphone shoved as close to Brian’s mouth as he could get it. Cameras flashed. TV cameras aimed. More reporters followed.
“Mr. Dennis, what was your reason for posting bail for Roxanne Monet, an accused murderer?” The question was loud.
Everyone froze. Except the reporters. Roxanne’s heart stopped.
Paul tugged himself away from Dr. Oki and wheeled around to the cameras. “Why do you think? He probably helped her ice her husband.”
No one had a chance to stop Brian. The left-handed blow to Paul Paris’s face flew swiftly and landed cleanly. Paul hit the floor before anyone reacted.
But then, all hell broke loose and Roxanne felt as if she were in the eye of a hurricane.
Dr. Oki took control of Paul, enlisting the aid of a nurse in the vicinity.
Al grabbed Brian and this time put a grip on him that would not be undone—or Brian allowed himself to be dragged back out the door and through the crowd that had gathered. The media mob pounced on her.
“Is this true, Ms. Monet? Is there any truth to Paul Paris’s accusations?”
“What were you doing here at the hospital this morning?”
“How long have you been involved with Brian Dennis?”
“Why did you kill your husband?”
That question made her move. With Laura’s help, she pushed her way through the mob and flashing cameras to the door.
She hardly saw their faces and didn’t let any more of the questions register in her mind.
She only met the eyes of one reporter on her way out.
Pat Banyan. He shoved a microphone toward her and opened his mouth to ask a question.
“Don’t even think about it,” she said too quietly for anyone to hear but him. For that moment she focused all her anger at him in the pinpoint of her stare. He didn’t speak. She turned away and escaped through the door with Laura.
***
They drove home in almost silence. Roxanne slouched in the passenger seat staring out the window, trying to keep her mind as blank, as unfocused as possible.
Laura shook her head and muttered under her breath, alternating with deep breathing and blowing out puffs of air as if she were in her second stage of labor.
It could have gone either way. Roxanne could have broken down into despairing sobs right then and there, or she could have laughed hysterically. She decided to laugh. Especially in light of Laura’s behavior.
“What the hell’s so funny, I’d like to know?
This has been anything but funny. How can you be sitting there right now laughing?
” Laura pulled the car into Roxanne’s driveway and looked at her with an incredulous stare.
That made Roxanne laugh all the more. Her stomach began to get that tight ache that happened when she laughed too hard.
She knew she’d better stop before she could be considered certifiably hysterical.
She calmed herself and patted Laura’s arm.
“I’m sorry, but I have so few choices. Would you rather see me sob?” She finally found a more even emotional setting and tried to steady herself there.
“No. I don’t know. Maybe. I know you probably feel like it.
I couldn’t possibly see how the situation could get any worse.
Maybe some day this will all be funny. But it doesn’t seem that way to me today.
” Laura looked at her. “And I’m really sorry because I feel responsible since it was my idea for you to go to the hospital in the first place. I should have known better.”
The hospital. Lindy. Roxanne could feel herself slipping over the edge into the abyss of pain again and she shook her head. She couldn’t do it. Not yet. Not now. There was still a long way to go.
“I guess I prefer to skip over all the despair and get right to the part where everything seems comical. There must be some kind of psychological term for that. Maybe they call it denial or something.” She smiled at Laura. Her chin trembled.
Laura shook her head and laughed through her tears. Roxanne leaned over and hugged her friend. Laura had tried so hard to be valiant through the whole ordeal. She had pushed herself well beyond her normal limits of emotional endurance.
Roxanne took a tissue from the console and wiped her friend’s face. They got out of the car.
“Let’s go in and have some tea or something. What is it one does in a situation like this?” Laura asked.
“How about a shot of whiskey?” Roxanne suggested as they walked into the kitchen.
Laura laughed. Bonnie had the TV tuned into the news and they were all front and center. She shook her head and put on the teakettle. They all sat at the kitchen table. Roxanne turned off the TV and they watched the fire in the fireplace instead.
“Lucky I saved you some whiskey. After seeing that news clip, I felt the need for a shot or two myself,” Bonnie said, then sat herself down.
Roxanne tried not to notice the men out back throwing the life-sized dummy off the deck down onto the rocks. Al said they’d be doing tests. She got up to watch.
“They’ve been at it all morning,” Bonnie said. “Sure hope it does some good.”
One man, struggling, carried the soaking wet dummy up the steps.
When he reached the top he let the limp figure drop onto the deck with a sickening thud.
She tried not to look at the body. It wasn’t Don.
But when her eyes betrayed her with a glance, she felt it all over again.
The heat rose to her face, beads of sweat broke out all over her body, and her stomach clenched in revulsion.
The dizzying nausea overwhelmed her until she forced herself to look away.
It was not Don.
But that hardly mattered. It had been Don.
She leaned back against the wall, squeezing her eyes closed as tight as she could, but she felt some of the tears escaping anyway.
She let herself slide down the wall to a heap on the floor and let her head drop into her hands.
She felt Laura and Bonnie hover over her.
She heard their voices, but she didn’t hear what they said.
She felt their hands on her, trying to move her.
But she couldn’t respond. She fell into the solace of oblivion.
***
By the time Al arrived later that day, Roxanne felt she’d recovered her sanity. But with it came the unrelenting feeling of loss. Images of Lindy and Don floated through her mind. But the worse sense of loss came when she thought of Brian Dennis.
The phone rang. She sat in the kitchen in her assigned seat at the table, sipping tea. The phone rang a lot. She’d turned off her cell phone. Al picked up his cell and clicked it on. He nodded. “Did you find him?” Al asked.
Roxanne knew he was talking about Mark. She tuned out the conversation. Roxanne hated having to be so desperately counting on one man’s appearance. It shouldn’t be so hard to prove she was innocent. She shouldn’t have to. But it was, and she did.
That was the thought that had been nagging at the back of her mind these last months. Every time it came up she pushed it back down. She’d been determined to win the war of wills against Penelope.
The realization was finally taking hold, however, that maybe there was no making up for the fact that Don was dead.
Someone had to pay. Marrying Don was a mistake she’d have to live with.
If Penelope succeeded in making her atone for his death, she’d have to live with that too. Maybe no other penance would do.
She looked at Al as he hung up the phone. The smile he had on his face disappeared as he looked at her.
“Don’t mind me. This is my day for being morose.
I’ll get over it.” She smiled at him. But she wasn’t so sure how she’d get over all this.
She straightened in her chair and put more effort into her smile.
She determined that she sure as hell was going to have to do her best to live with “it.” Because “it” was herself.
“This should cheer you. Thanks to the last lead, the detective is one step behind Mark and closing in. We’re making progress all around.
Our forensics expert says we should have test results on the dynamics of the fall to support our theory.
” Al stopped talking. “This is good news, Rox. Are you sure you’re okay?
You should have let Dr. Oki give you that sedative. ”
“I don’t need a sedative. Look how calm I am.
I have all I need. A good lawyer and good friends.
” Her smile broke out automatically this time.
He took her hand and beamed a smile back.
She decided she loved Al. The same way she’d loved Don.
She looked away from him. She was going to have to let him go. Soon.