Chapter 9
NINE
ADAM
Two weeks passed in a flurry of football and fucking. Adam lay in bed staring out of the window at his gardens. The shower running in the en suite gave him comfort.
He hated being alone. Especially in a house of this size.
They had fallen into a routine frighteningly quickly. Jonas was singing in Swedish in the shower. A warmth spread through Adam that he hadn’t had since Jen.
I’m falling for him. That much is clear.
The shower and singing stopped. Soon enough a naked Jonas wandered through, towelling his hair.
“Are you dripping?” Adam asked.
“Are you?”
“Come to bed.”
“No can do. I need to get home before they get up,” Jonas replied. “Tito caught me the other day. So now I have an early morning jogging habit.”
Adam lay on the pillow and pouted. No matter how much time they spent in bed, he could never get enough.
“You’ll see me at training in about three hours anyway.”
“That isn’t the same thing.”
Jonas winked. “Look but can’t touch.”
Adam snuggled into a pillow.
“Sounds kinda horny.”
Jonas sat on the bed to put his socks on. Adam stroked his leg.
“There’s always a late-night booty call,” Jonas said.
“We should be resting more.”
“Oh okay, Skipper.”
Adam seemed lost in thought. “I suppose an afternoon nap would safeguard against unnecessary fatigue.”
Jonas kissed him. “Now you’re talking my language.”
With a snarl, Adam grabbed Jonas.
“Oi.”
He nuzzled Jonas’ neck. “One more hit.”
Jonas giggled. “The man’s got it bad.”
“He certainly does.”
After Jonas struggled free, Adam leapt out of bed.
Goran had asked him to call in on the way to Newby Park. It would make the time pass quicker until he got his hands on Jonas again.
He ducked into the walk-in wardrobe and grabbed a tracksuit, some undies and socks. When he came into the bedroom, Jonas was fully dressed.
“Grey sweatpants?” Jonas said. “You’re really testing my resolve.”
Jonas came over and ran his fingertip over Adam’s chest. His cock twitched in response.
“I want you in black boxers only when I come later.”
“Is that right?”
Jonas nodded. He kissed Adam on the tip of the nose.
“I’ll let myself out.”
Once Jonas had gone, Adam had an extra-long shower. He might as well make the most of being up at the crack of dawn. Sneaking around was more tiring than he’d expected.
After he’d dressed, he took a photo of himself and sent it to Jonas. He made sure to accentuate his bulge.
He immediately got a panting emoji in return.
“Down, boy.”
Goran’s house was on the way to the training ground so he only had to drive for about fifteen minutes. It puzzled him what his friend would want that he couldn’t say in front of the others or over the phone.
He hoped it wasn’t anything to do with Petar. He’d seemed fighting fit the last time Adam had seen him.
Goran and his wife, Paloma, lived in an old manor house.
It was pissing with rain. Training would be fun. Then the prospect of Jonas’ kit sticking to his body could persuade him differently.
Goran was dressed for action when he let Adam into the house. He found Paloma in a bathrobe, feeding little Petar.
“Oh God. Sorry, Paloma,” Adam said.
He did a one-eighty degree turn and walked straight into Goran.
“Fuck.”
“Relax,” Paloma shouted after him. “I don’t care.”
Goran gently moved him into the room.
“She honestly doesn’t,” Goran said. “If the boy needs feeding, he’s the boss.”
“Is he okay?” Adam asked.
“Of course he is,” Goran replied. “Coffee?”
Adam tried to live a caffeine-free life. Recently he’d been relying on it more and more. Late nights and early mornings were catching up to him.
“Great.”
Paloma passed Petar to him.
“Oh, I don’t know. I’m still not very good at it.”
With limbs as stiff as boards he took hold of the dozing child.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Paloma said pushing her breast into the vest top she had on. “If you don’t practice, you’ll never get any better. That’s right. Support his head with your arm. See? He’s snuggling in.”
Adam gazed at this tiny creature. When he’d visited before he usually had Ewen or Ingvar in tow. They cooed over the baby like a pair of pigeons.
Goran placed a cup next to Adam and took a seat.
“You’re getting it, mate.”
A warm burst of pride washed over Adam. “He’s cute as fuck.”
Paloma shook her head. “I’m going to get dressed properly before you abandon us. Adam, I apologise for looking like such a dog.”
“As if,” Adam replied.
Paloma was a half Italian, half Mancunian beauty. Her jet-black hair and huge brown eyes had graced many a magazine cover.
She swept toward the door.
“Hey, wait,” Adam said. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”
“He’s all yours for fifteen minutes.”
She left them to it.
“Do you want him?” Adam asked.
“No chance. I’ve been holding him for two hours.”
Adam tried to get comfortable without disturbing the seemingly content Petar.
“So what’s up?” Adam asked.
Goran had a strange expression on his face. As though he had a secret.
“Nothing. I thought you should spend time with your godson.”
“I’m sorry, my what?”
“Your godson. If you’ll accept. Paloma and I would love it.”
Tears pricked his eyes. “Are you sure? I’m not exactly Mr Responsible.”
Goran playfully kicked him. “Get out. You’re the best captain in the Premier League.”
“Now I know you’re lying.”
He gazed down at Petar. The innocent little soul would grow up in a life of luxury. That came with its own pressures. To play a tiny part in guiding him was a huge responsibility.
If Jen could see him now. She’d always called him immature. The perennial lad. In fact that might have been the last thing she ever did say to him.
“I’d be honoured,” he said. “Thank you.”
“Nice one.”
Adam took a second to regain his composure. This had been the last thing on his mind when he’d arrived.
Paloma began singing at the top of her voice elsewhere in the house.
“Oh Jesus,” Goran said.
He grabbed his phone and put the radio on.
“What was that?”
“My wife is the worst singer in the UK,” Goran replied. “Poor Petar will have to suffer her lullabies, I’m afraid.”
Adam grinned. “I don’t have to intervene as godfather, do I?”
“I’m the father and I wouldn’t dare.”
Petar squirmed. Adam gently put his finger in the tot’s hand. He clasped it tight.
“It suits you,” Goran said.
“Oh really?” Adam replied. “I think not.”
Goran was staring at him.
“It’s been a year since you and Jen broke up.”
“It has not been a year,” Adam replied. “Has it?”
He had no appetite for the Jen file being opened this early in the morning.
“Don’t you think it’s time you got back out there?”
“How do you know I haven’t?”
Goran boomed with laughter. Poor Petar shivered.
“Please don’t disturb my godson,” Adam said, holding the baby a little tighter.
“You are hilarious. If you were seeing someone, you absolutely would tell me. You can’t keep anything to yourself.”
Once again, Adam rested his eyes on Petar. Maybe it was his new title. Yet something compelled Adam to get everything off his chest with his best friend.
“If I tell you something, it’s going to change the way you see me forever.”
“Oh fuck. Don’t tell me you’re gay now.”
Goran’s laughter rang out again. Then stopped abruptly.
“You’re not.”
“Not quite,” Adam replied. “Bi. I always have been.”
“What?”
Adam stared at his friend. “Is it that hard to believe?”
“Erm…yes! Fucking hell, mate.”
Realisation appeared to dawn on Goran’s face.
“Not with one of the new three?”
“That would be really fucking stupid, wouldn’t it?”
A few hours later, the entire squad were in the canteen at Newby Park. Adam picked over yet another bowl of pasta and grilled salmon.
How much of this shit have I eaten over the years?
“Roll on summer,” he said.
Those three months of being off the leash were paradise.
The canteen was a decent size. Clusters of office staff were dotted around. It took about a week for staff to stop being impressed at sharing a space with Premier League footballers.
They had an unwritten rule that the big table by the window was for the team. As if they didn’t spend enough time looking at that grass outside.
“Ugh, we’ve got Steven’s tactics talk after this,” Colin said. “Shit, sorry, Udo.”
Udo chuckled. “Don’t apologise to me. It’s boring as fuck.”
“Does he whisper free kick techniques to you at night?” Ewen asked.
“No. I’ve usually rendered him unable to speak.”
They all groaned.
“Listen up,” Goran said. “I’ve got an announcement.”
Instantly they all fell silent. They all loved a bit of gossip.
“Paloma and I are christening Petar next month and we’d like you all to attend.”
“Nice one,” Edi said. “That sounds very special.”
Goran shook his hand.
“Adam here has agreed to step up as one of Petar’s godparents.”
Now all eyes were on him. Great.
“You?” Ewen asked.
“Yes, me.”
“Well that’s favouritism.”
Goran shook his head. “He can’t have fifteen godfathers. You can have the next one. I promise.”
Ewen winked. “Second the best. Don’t keep me waiting.”
Adam locked eyes with Jonas, who watched him intently. He thought he might burst with pride. As they’d driven over, Adam had reflected on how much this meant to him. And he made a vow that he would do everything he could for Petar.
“Can I bring a guest?” Colin asked.
“Yes of course. Partners are invited,” Goran replied. “Who are you bringing?”
Colin puffed his chest up. “Meg.”
“Meg the physio?” Ewen asked. “Pretty but deadly Meg the physio?”
“Say my name one more time and I’ll appear, Ewen Armitage.”
Adam liked Meg very much. She took absolutely no shit. When she’d first joined Brockton, he had declared her way too young for such a position. How wrong he had been.
“Here she is,” Ewen said. “We’ve heard the news. Congratulations.”
Meg nodded. “Thank you, Ewen.”
The other lads were transfixed. Meg grinned at Colin, who went every shade of red.
“Will you need a chaperone for future sports massages?” Ewen asked.
Meg patted him on the shoulder. “I think I’ll contain myself. I’ll see you straight after. That should chase away any naughty thoughts.”
“She got you there,” Ingvar said.
Ewen fake pouted. “I’m wounded.”
Meg sat next to Noah. “What were you talking about anyway?”
“Goran is christening his kid,” Alain said.
“Aw nice.”
“And you’re invited,” Goran said.
“As my plus one,” Colin added.
She beamed at him. “That sounds like fun.”
“Like I said, all partners are welcome.”
To Adam’s dismay, Goran pointedly stared at Jonas.
Talk about making it obvious. Fucking hell.
“Shit,” Meg said. “All those soap stars will be glam as fuck.”
“So will you,” Colin replied.
He gazed at Meg adoringly. Sort of like a cross between a cherub and a basset hound.
“We’re going shopping after training,” she replied.
Adam glanced at his watch. “We’d better get moving. Tactics await.”
They spent the next four hours planning their gameplay for the weekend. This helped them determine the set pieces they would practice for the next two days.
As feared, it actually was dull as fuck. Steven did like to get into a lot of detail about the enemy’s playing style.
“Do you ever get chance to fuck?” Adam whispered to Udo. “Or is he watching other men’s legs all the time.”
Udo smirked. “Oh we get the chance. You haven’t got the monopoly on it, you know.”
Adam winked.
Finally they were released into the world. Adam drove straight home. It was cold out and he planned an afternoon on the sofa under a blanket with a movie.
Just as he was getting settled, the intercom buzzed.
“Can I not have a moment of peace?” Adam said to the empty room.
As the skipper, it wasn’t unusual for one or more of the lads to show up unannounced for a chat or to hang out. When Jen had left, Adam had encouraged it. The house had been so desolate.
It had become a bit of an inconvenience now he’d embarked on a secret affair with another player. He shuddered.
Am I really doing that?
It all seemed unreal.
“Hello?” he said into the intercom.
“I couldn’t wait until nightfall.”
Adam’s stomach did a somersault. He pressed the access button.
Before opening the door, he checked his appearance. His hair was a bit fluffy but it would have to do.
Jonas stood on the doorstep by the time he got there.
“Didn’t I say black boxers?” Jonas said.
He didn’t give Adam the chance to respond. He grabbed him and drew him close. Their lips pressed together.
Adam walked him into the house and shut the door with his foot. Jonas smashed him up against the wall, his body weight on him.
The kiss became more. Hungrily they were tasting each other. They clashed tongues in their urge to reclaim their territory.
“Shit,” Adam said, panting. “It’s torture.”
Jonas licked his neck. “I find it horny.”
He had a curious way of flipping things.
“Our secret?” Adam said.
“Except you’ve told Goran.”
They broke apart.
“Okay I admit. It slipped out this morning.”
Jonas kissed his forehead.
They walked into the lounge. Adam sank down and held his arms out for Jonas to fill.
Which he did.
Once more, Adam had found peace.
“Do you mind?” Adam asked.
“It’s your secret.”
“No it isn’t. It’s ours.”
Jonas sighed. It hadn’t occurred to Adam that he might be enforcing a life of secrecy on Jonas against his will. He’d assumed they both needed discretion.
“It won’t always be like this.”
“Really?”
“No,” Adam said. “When we’re really serious about each other, we’ll go public.”
Jonas’ head shot up. “I am serious.”
“Hey,” Adam replied, stroking his hair. “I didn’t mean it like that. When we’re really truly sure it’s working. I’m not ready to have us picked over by the whole world.”
He took Jonas’ hand.
“For the record, I am serious too.”
Jonas raised Adam’s hand and kissed his knuckles.
“Then we wait.”
“At least until we can run away if it all goes to shit. I know I’m being unfair.”
Jonas shrugged. “It’s ironic that I find myself back in the closet the minute I burst out of it.”
“For what it’s worth. I won’t be sleeping with anyone else while I’m with you. I am committed.”
It might not be all that romantic but Adam hoped Jonas would take it in the spirit Adam meant it.
“I’ll level with you,” Jonas replied. “Cheating triggers me. There would be no going back. Not even a kiss.”
Jonas looked like a frightened child.
“I promise,” Adam said with as much sincerity as he could manage. He meant it and he truly wanted Jonas to believe him.
“Me too.”