Chapter 43
PARKER
The next week passes in a blur of traveling, games, and exhaustion. But despite that, every day I love my job and the direction my career is going even more. This job might have turned my world upside down, but as I expected, it’s in the best way possible.
The guys are incredible. They’re midway through the season, and their bodies are beginning to show the signs of exertion. With every game, there is more athletic tape used to keep them together, and the postgame sessions on my table get longer, as do the ice baths.
It’s late afternoon when my final athlete of the day rolls off my table, dresses, and slips out of the room.
With my own exhaustion and need for a quiet, early night setting in, I take my iPad to our connecting office and fall into my chair to get some notes written up.
The sound of Mitchell and the athlete he’s working with filters through the air, but I easily block them out and focus on my own job.
It’s not until his shadow darkens the doorway to the office a while later that I finally look up from what I’m doing.
“I’m late,” he tells me as he grabs his bag and throws it over his shoulder, ready to leave.
Suspicion rolls through me, and I push to my feet and look out into the training room.
The table he abandoned is still covered in his athlete’s sweat, and there is tape littering the floor, equipment everywhere.
“You can clean up for me, can’t you?” he sneers as he pushes past me.
My chin drops as fury shoots through my veins.
I’m so stunned that he’s long gone before my brain can conjure up any words.
“Fucking asshole,” I seethe. But it’s too late.
I stare at the mess he’s left behind. There’s a huge part of me that wants to ignore it. To turn my back and walk away.
But I can’t.
I refuse to allow Jarad, or any other member of staff, to walk in here tomorrow and think I was okay to leave it this way.
With trembling hands, I set to work, and not fifteen minutes later, the room is sorted and ready for another day of treatment.
Tiredness pulls at my muscles as I gather up my own things, turn the lights out, and head for the exit.
As I’m walking toward my car, I pull my cell from my pocket and find a notification waiting for me, confirming my appointment for tonight.
“Fuck,” I hiss.
I hadn’t forgotten. This morning, I was fully aware of what my evening consisted of. But today has been so busy, and my desire for a relaxing night happily wiped the thoughts out.
Dread sits heavy in my stomach as I drop into my car and rest my head back. My eyes close automatically, which is dangerous, and I sit there for a few minutes, trying to gather my thoughts and courage to do what needs to be done.
I need to know the full reality of the situation, but also, I really don’t want to.
My cell taunts me from the center console as I drive. The need to call Casey and have her come with me burns through me. But I fight it.
She’s got a life now, a family, a man who’s spent most of this week away traveling; she doesn’t need me to be constantly calling on her for support. Things have changed, and I need to accept that.
Hoping that I’m going to need it, I stop by Linc’s apartment for the suitcase I bought to travel with and a couple of tote bags. It might be wishful thinking, but a girl can hope. What’s that saying about planning for the outcome you want?
With my head held high, my shoulders thrown back, and hope in my head, I tug my empty suitcase from my room and toward the elevator.
It was empty when I passed through a couple of minutes ago, but I suspected Linc wasn’t far away, considering I just parked beside his car. But I soon discover that is no longer the case when his voice booms around me.
“What are you doing?” There’s something in his tone that instantly makes me spin around.
Panic, maybe?
“W-what?” I stutter, finding him standing in the middle of his kitchen, wearing only a pair of sweatpants and a deep frown.
He rubs the back of his neck as his eyes bounce from my face to the suitcase.
“Are you moving out?”
I continue to stare at him in surprise. He looks…devastated.
It has to be his own exhaustion peeking through, because there is no way that can be true.
“I’m…uh… going to my old apartment. They’ve said that the building has been secured and that we can—”
“Alone?”
“Y-yeah.” Do I want to do this alone? No, not really. But I’m also aware that I need to pull up my big-girl panties and just get it done.
“No, you’re fucking not,” he states, surging forward. “Let me get dressed. I’ll take you.”
He marches away, leaving me watching the muscles of his back pulling as he moves.
“You don’t need to do that,” I call after him.
He shakes his head but doesn’t say anything before he slips into his room.
Not two minutes later, he’s back, wearing a hoodie and a pair of sneakers, asking, “Do you need another suitcase?”
“I’m not sure I’m even going to need this one,” I say sadly. The truth of it is that everything could be destroyed. Being able to bring anything back here is wishful thinking.
Taking the suitcase from where it’s sitting at my feet, he shocks the shit out of me by grabbing my hand and then towing me toward the elevator.
The heat of his skin sears mine and burns all the way up my arm. I stare down at where we’re connected as we wait for the doors to open.
Is he…is he really holding my hand?
“Come on, we need to get this over with,” he says, pulling me inside at the first possible opportunity.
The second the doors close, I swear all the air is sucked from the enclosed space, and it only gets worse when he continues speaking.
“Why didn’t you say?”
I shrug my shoulder not connected to the hand he’s holding.
“Why would I?” I mutter, already knowing it’s the wrong thing to say.
“So I could do it with you. It’s a shitty thing to have to do alone, little P.”
I shrug again as I stare ahead, not able to find any words.
“What have they said?”
“Just that it’s safe for a short visit. They gave a couple of dates to get in, but tonight is the final one. We were traveling for the others.”
Linc exhales heavily but doesn’t comment.
“How long do we have?”
“By the time we get there, an hour, maybe less.”
He nods and strides out of the elevator like a man on a mission. With my hand still locked in his, I have no choice but to run along behind him.
The second we’re at his car, he opens his passenger door for me and waits while I climb inside before closing me in. After putting my suitcase in the trunk, he marches to the driver’s side and drops in beside me.
Silently, he pulls out of his space, and moments later we’re on the road, heading for my building. Or what was my building.
It’s taken quite some time to come to terms with the fact I’ve lost my apartment, even weeks on, the whole situation feels surreal, but I’m getting there.
Or at least, I think I am.
The second Linc pulls up outside the black and singed building, I realize that maybe I haven’t come to terms with anything.
A huge ball of dread sits heavily in my stomach as I stare up at the blown-out windows.
It’s worse than I remember.
My mouth waters as if I’m about to vomit, and I throw the passenger door open as I suck in a deep breath through my nose.
I startle as a large hand lands on my shoulder, and even more so when he speaks.
“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” he assures me as he lowers to his haunches.
Our eyes meet, mine watery and emotional, his set with determination.
“All you have to do is say the word, and I’ll go in and pull out everything I can.”
As nice as that option sounds, I can’t. It’s my apartment. My stuff. I need to do this.
“Thank you,” I say weakly. “But I have to do this.”
“Okay,” he agrees, before pushing to his feet and reaching for my hand again.
I should say no. I should be brave enough to do this without his touch and support, but I don’t think I am.
With a nod, I slip my hand into his and allow him to pull me to my feet.
Side by side, and with dread sitting heavy within me, we greet the security guy guarding the entrance and step inside.
The second I breathe in, the need to vomit returns.
The air is full of death and destruction. Deep down, I know that thankfully, no one lost their life here, but it’s hard to believe with the smell.
Linc’s grip on my hand tightens as I lead him toward the stairwell.
“Which floor were you on?” he asks hesitantly.
“Fifteen,” I confess, staring at the stairwell as if it’s a mountain I’d been told I’ve got to climb.
“Could be worse,” Linc mutters as we begin our ascent.
Despite us both being fit, we’re panting by the time we get to our floor. I’m pretty sure it’s the air that's full of smoke and ash that does it.
“Did you used to take the stairs often?” Linc asks as I walk past the doors of what used to be my neighbors’ homes.
“No, I can’t say I’ve ever done that before. Here,” I say, reaching out with a shaky hand to push the twisted door open.
I close my eyes for a beat before opening them and walking in. But it turns out that no amount of time to prepare would have been enough.
While my windows might still be intact, and my things not burned to a crisp, everything is black. And I mean everything.
“Oh my god,” I gasp, my hand lifting to cover my mouth as the tears I’m barely keeping at bay finally spill over.
I had an image in my head of what this moment might be like, how my apartment might look, but it was nothing like this.
Everything about my life is here in this apartment, and it’s ruined. All of it.
My entire body trembles as I take a few steps forward, attempting to see through the tears flooding my eyes.
The second my gaze lands on a shelf that’s full of photos of those I love, covered in black soot, I lose it.
An ugly sob rips up my throat as the stress and grief I’ve been battling with since New Year’s finally comes to a head.
But I only have to endure it alone for a brief moment because, not a second later, a pair of strong arms wrap around me and I’m nestled into his hard body. The scent of destruction takes a back seat, and I bury my nose into his chest, breathing in deeply and allowing myself to drown in him.
He ducks his head, pressing his mouth to the top of my head, and a contented sigh erupts.
“It’s okay, little P. I’ve got you. I’ve always got you.”