Chapter 4
Hudson
“Hey Mons,” I greet my sister as I walk into her kitchen, relishing the air-conditioned space.
Outside, it’s already thick and wet with humidity even though it’s only eight o’clock Saturday morning.
Monica rolls her eyes at me from her seat at the table, not bothering to ask if I need help with the bags loaded on my forearms.
“I hate when you call me that. I’m thirty-six years old, Hud. I don’t want pubic bone as a nickname anymore.”
I laugh. Getting under my big sister’s skin is my favorite thing to do.
Shrugging, I flash her an innocent look. “At least I dropped the pubis part.”
“God, you’re annoying.”
That may be true, but she’s smiling as she says it, and that’s my main goal these days. Make Monica smile.
“Where do you want these?” I ask, holding up the bags.
She nods her head to a spot next to her. “Right here is fine. I appreciate you picking the order up on your way over,” she says, shuffling papers into neat piles.
“Are you excited for the kids to start daycare?” I make small talk even though she’s clearly trying to work.
“I have mixed feelings,” she admits.
My niece and nephew are four and three respectively.
My sister became a single-mom and a widow all at once when my brother-in-law, who also happened to be my best friend, was killed by a drunk driver.
Camden and Ally will grow up not remembering their father while the bastard who killed him got off on a fucking technicality.
That’s part of the reason my sister is going back to work as an ADA. She wants to ensure no more assholes walk because of mistrials and corrupt officials.
Monica has abandoned the papers on the table and is putting something away in the cabinet to my left when I grab her shoulders and force her to look at me. We share similar features except she’s the bite-sized version of my six-foot-two frame.
“Monny, putting your kids in daycare so that you can go back to work and support them, does not make you a bad parent. Camden and Ally will be just fine.” I drop my hands from her shoulders before she can start crying, and nudge her hip with mine.
“I mean, we went to daycare and look how awesome we turned out.”
She smiles at me and shakes her head.
“I appreciate you taking the kids down to the beach today. I know between your new route and the fire station you don’t have many days off, but it’s really helpful so I can get a few things done before starting on Monday.”
At the mention of the beach—even though she’s referring to the sandy swim area at the lake and not the real beach—I immediately think of Will, and a sharp pain lances through my chest again.
I’ve avoided the real beach ever since he died.
Will, Monica, and I grew up in southern Florida and I’ve always been drawn to the water.
It used to bring me such comfort and joy.
I was stationed in coastal cities for a lot of my military career and I swear it’s what kept me sane.
But Monny and Will moved to North Carolina for Will’s job right before Ally was born and when it was time to get out of the service, I knew I’d land wherever they were.
But it doesn’t mean I don’t miss our coastal Florida town like crazy.
Or the beach in general. Or my best friend. Especially my best friend.
My sister’s voice brings me back to the present. “I just haven’t had a haircut in a while and I’d like to look my best when I have to be in court. I thought I’d have more time, but when that idiot got caught banging the prosecuting attorney, I got reassigned and I’m a little unprepared.”
I offer my sister the comfort she seeks.
“You’re going to crush the new job, Mon.
Hell, you’re overqualified. And at least this way they don’t have you making copies and doing coffee runs.
You’ll get your feet wet right away and it’s just like riding a bike.
It’ll all come back to you.” Like a lot of women, Monica stopped working when she had Ally.
Her favorite thing ever is being a mom, but alas, Will’s life insurance will only carry them so far.
She blows out a breath and wraps her arms around my torso in a hug.
“Thanks, Hud. I don’t know that anyone is overqualified to be an ADA though.
I carry the same credentials as the rest of them and a lot less experience.
” She pulls away from me and I busy myself with the rest of her groceries as I tell her the next part.
Too much intense emotion still makes her breakdown pretty easily.
“But you can read people and a room like no one I’ve ever met,” I explain. “More than a degree and book smarts are needed for that job and you have the compassion and intuition, not to mention the balls of steel, to make you a perfect fit.”
She smiles and squeezes my shoulder, but stays silent, alerting me to the emotion stuck in her throat.
Giving her a moment to herself, I walk into the living room and find my niece and nephew playing some version of pretend restaurant.
After dutifully ordering chocolate ice cream, a cheeseburger, and a pancake, I scoop the kids up, one in each arm, and bounce them around until their giggles have me laughing too.
“You sure you can handle this alone?” Monica asks, coming into the room to help me wrangle two sets of legs into swim jammers.
“I won’t be alone. Phoenix and Knox are meeting me at the beach.”
“Oh, God. Don’t let them corrupt my sweet babies.”
My buddies have become uncles to Mon’s kids and the laugh that escapes from her mouth tells me she’s only teasing.
“Where are Jake and Dylan?” she asks, inquiring about the fourth and fifth members of our bro-squad.
“Visiting Dylan’s sister, Cassie, in Miami. They should be back tomorrow.”
Phoenix has had the hots for Dylan’s twin sister, Cassie ever since he first laid eyes on her.
He asked her to marry him before he even knew her name.
The memory still makes me laugh. But Phoe is a playboy through and through and has been since his time on the rodeo circuit. He’s a one-and-done kind of guy.
Knox on the other hand went through a nasty divorce a while back that left him devastated. To make it worse, he lost his dad a year later. He’s grumpy as fuck and tends to push people away so he hasn’t dated anyone since Karen left. But somehow, he tolerates me, Jake, Dylan, and Phoenix.
Jake says we’re his charity case. Fine by me. Knox is the one with the boat…and the beach house that I haven’t gotten the nerve to visit yet.
Once the kids are in their suits, I load all the gear into my truck.
Tent for shade? Check.
Baby safe sunscreen? Check.
Floppy hats? Check.
Buckets and shovel sets? Check.
Sunglasses they won’t keep on? Check
And the list goes on: diapers, snacks, juice, etc…
Finally having the car seats switched to my truck and everyone loaded up, I head to the lake with two of my favorite people.
Phoenix slips another beer can in a koozie, pops the top, and hands it to me. Both kids have been asleep in the tent for about thirty minutes and the three of us adults are soaking up the sun and the quiet after two hours of non-stop interaction with the little balls of energy.
I don’t know how my sister does it. Or any single parent for that matter.
We’re all sitting around shooting the shit when a woman carrying a small baby in a backpack-style-carrier catches my attention.
Shannon.
She’s in a crew-cut white tank top, hot pink workout shorts, and tennis shoes.
I try to move my attention elsewhere, but I can’t help noticing the way her toned legs propel her down the beach, or the way the pink, reflective lenses of her aviator sunglasses match her shorts and stand out against her tanned skin, or the way small tendrils of dark hair have escaped from her ponytail.
Silently, I wonder if she ever relaxes. I wonder if she ever has the chance.
I almost jog over to her to say hello, but then I remember that would be weird. She doesn’t know me.
“Wow, that chick’s hot,” Phoenix says beside me.
“What chick?” I ask, pulling my attention off Shannon.
“Uh, the one you’re currently eye-fucking?
” His comment makes Knox turn his head in her direction.
Even he gives a low whistle of appreciation before raising his beer can to his lips.
“Too bad I can see the kid on her back and I assume that bright pink band on her ring finger is one of those silicone wedding bands.”
I blow out a breath. Lying to Phoenix is pointless. He’s like a fucking drug dog with secrets. He’ll sniff them out regardless of how much shit you pile on top to hide the smell. It’s probably also the reason he’s so damn good at hiding his own.
“She’s on my new route at work. Always has expensive shit she has to sign for.”
“That look in your eyes says you have a different kind of package you’d like to deliver,” Phoenix teases.
“I have sunglasses on, you idiot. You don’t know what I’m looking at,” I mutter, following Knox’s lead and taking a sip of my beer.
“Bro, you’re wearing swim trunks. I may not be able to see where your eyes are pointed, but I can sure as hell tell where everything else is aiming.”
I look down and fuck my life, I’m sporting a semi.
“Quit looking at my dick, you perv.”
Phoenix laughs as I adjust myself and beg my cock to deflate. Shannon’s down the beach now, but a ripple of excitement coasts through me when I realize she’ll have to pass by us again on her way back to the parking lot.
“Aw, don’t be upset, Hud,” Knox says. “Phoe’s just admiring yours because he’s still looking for his little peepee. It’s been missing since the ice fishing trip.”
“Oh, for Christ’s sake. Here we go again. My cock is perfection and if you two would like proof, I’d be happy to bend you the fuck over and let you feel just how perfect it is.”
“Would you now?” I taunt. That was awfully descriptive for a straight guy.
“Hey. Watch the young ears,” Knox says with a clenched jaw. I swear to God, his jaw is always clenched. Knox needs to get laid even worse than I do.
“They’re asleep,” I argue.
“Are they, though?” he asks with raised brows, causing me to turn around and see my nephew at the opening of the tent.
“Oh, hey, Cam.” Oops.
The preschooler rubs sleep from his eyes and waddles toward Phoenix before I scoop him up and sit him on my knee. Thankfully, nothing kills a hard-on like a kid in your lap. Always on the same schedule, Ally appears not even a minute later and goes straight for Phoenix as well.
I swear age and gender don’t discriminate with him. If it breathes, it’s going straight to Phoenix, every single time.
“Would you look at us,” I tease, holding out my phone to take a selfie. “It’s a good thing Knox is out here running interference with that scowl or you’d have a swarm of potential bedmates around you, Phoe.”
“In that case, would you mind waiting in the car, Knoxy?” Phoenix asks with a shit-eating grin.
“You’d better be glad you’re holding my niece, you, firecracker,” Knox says, using our codeword for motherfucker, making me and Phoenix howl with laughter. Nothing ever hits quite as well as the actual word.
It may not seem like much, but this is one of my favorite ways to spend a day: low key, with friends and family, a beer at the lake, and my small, two-bedroom house up the Wilson River waiting for me when I’ve had my fill of the sun.
The only thing that could beat it is fishing on the coast at sunrise.
Another pang of loss strikes a chord so deep inside me, I have to cough to force the emotion down.
Thirty minutes later, the guys and I are with the kids at the water’s edge, pretending to be excited over the water hitting our toes for the seven-hundredth time when Phoenix nudges my shoulder.
“Pink aviator hotness, three o’clock.”
My eyes immediately scan the area and come to rest on Shannon.
Perhaps she feels me staring because she raises her head and turns my direction.
Although I can’t see her eyes, I can see that her attention is on the three of us.
I think I’ve died and gone to heaven when she offers our group a small, appreciative smile and nod.
“I think she likes what she sees,” Phoenix says, talking out of the corner of his mouth as he elbows me in the ribs being obvious as all fuck.
Ignoring him, I nod my head and offer her a smile in return, praying like hell she’s staring at me behind those glasses and not Knox or Phoenix.
I see you.
To my dismay, she doesn’t look back once she’s past us and I find myself hoping like hell she’s got a package that needs to be delivered this week.