Chapter Nineteen Lacey
Chapter Nineteen
Lacey
Vaughn sits on one of the mismatched barstools in front of our kitchen island.
“I want your honest opinion,” I say as I set the plate down in front of him. The aroma of apples and sugar fills the air.
His grin makes my stomach flip. With a fork in his right hand, he cuts off a small bite and puts it in his mouth. I wait anxiously for the verdict.
“This is really good,” he says and then goes for another bite.
“Really?” I ask, but then I cut into my own slice. The warm apple and cinnamon flavors melt on my tongue.
“Oh my gosh, it is really good,” I confirm, holding a hand over my mouth so I can talk while I chew.
Vaughn nods and we both keep eating. It’s the second time he’s come over to study since the party. Since he’s not cramming for a test, it’s more relaxed.
“Worth picking apples in the cold?” he asks.
“Absolutely.” Even if the pie were terrible, I wouldn’t wish that night away. Just all the thoughts swirling in my head since then. The feel of our hands linked. My arms wrapped around his middle. Him holding me on his shoulders to pick apples. That almost kiss.
He hasn’t tried to do it again or said anything about it. Perhaps I imagined it and he wasn’t about to kiss me? My face grows warm at the memory. I really need to get a grip.
“Okay,” I say, banishing all non-algebra-related thoughts away. “Let’s run through one more sample problem in case Dr. Frievalt throws a pop quiz at you tomorrow.”
Vaughn chuckles. “You enjoy this, don’t you?”
“Studying?” I ask.
He nods.
“Yeah, I guess so.” I’ve never really thought about whether I do or not and how strange that might be. “Is that weird?”
“Nah,” he says, then, “Maybe.”
I shrug both shoulders. “I probably get it from my dad. He loves studying so much he made an entire career out of it.”
Vaughn nods, holding the fork up to his lips. “What about your mom? What was she like?”
“Extroverted like me. My dad says I have her laugh, and she really liked to dance. Not for a studio or anything, just for fun. She played volleyball in high school and was in art club and did one year of band—the clarinet.” I drop my gaze to the pie as I feel a pang of longing to know her better.
“I know lots of random things about my mom, but it always feels shallow when I list them out like that.”
“Like a few hobbies and traits can somehow make up for not really knowing her?”
Even though Vaughn grew up without his mom around, for some reason I hadn’t expected him to understand. His mom is alive and he has a relationship with her, however imperfect. Or maybe it isn’t that simple.
“Exactly. And it’s never-ending. Each thing I learn about her makes me more curious.
Like, she wanted to go apple picking, but did she really like apples, or was that just a thing everyone did because the apple farm was so close?
Would she have made pie or something else?
Maybe there was a boy she liked who worked there and it had nothing to do with apple picking. ”
“Not the last.” He shakes his head with a smile.
“Girls have done far more to get a guy’s attention.”
His expression tells me he either doesn’t understand that or thinks it’s silly.
“It’s hard to get a guy’s attention.”
“No.” He shakes his head adamantly.
“Yes, it is,” I protest louder.
Smiling, he continues to shake his head at me.
“What do you do when you want to get someone’s attention?” I ask him instead of arguing my point.
“I don’t know.”
“Yes, you do.” I cross my arms over my chest. “Tell me.”
“I don’t do anything.” He laughs. “I haven’t gone out with anyone since Claire.”
I guess that much is true. But it just has me wondering other things.
“How come?”
I get a weak shrug in response, but now that we’ve opened this conversation, I want to know. Not because I haven’t stopped thinking about almost kissing him but because we’re friends. Friends share stuff like that. Whatever. I’m not overanalyzing it.
“Didn’t we already establish that I’m a shit boyfriend?”
I roll my eyes. “Lots of people talk or hook up without labeling it.”
“The label isn’t what made me bad at it.”
“Fair point, but come on. Everyone has someone who they’re at least sort of into.”
“Even you?”
Oops. I walked right into that. My pulse quickens as his blue eyes catch on mine.
“Don’t turn this around on me,” I say, feeling my face heat.
His lips quirk up at the corners.
“You aren’t interested in anyone?” I ask him instead.
“I didn’t say that.”
I will him to say he’s interested in me but almost immediately decide that would be the worst possible outcome. Vaughn and I cannot happen. Not only because of Claire but because we don’t make any sense together. Or we didn’t. Now that I’ve gotten to know him better, I suspect I was wrong.
“Well, what’s your move?” I ask him.
“No move. At least not right now. Two weeks of the season left, and if I’m not practicing or studying, then I’m sleeping.”
I feel a hint of disappointment in his answer, but as much as I want to push him to tell me who he’s interested in, I’m enjoying this back-and-forth with him.
It’s way safer this way where I can assume it’s not me and that even if he were into me, it’s not like I’m interested in him back.
Or that either of us is going to do anything about it.
“Or eating.” I use the fork in my hand to point to the rest of the pie. “Want another slice?”
“No.”
“Suit yourself.” I cut myself another and sit back down to get studying again, but Vaughn stands.
“You’re leaving?” My voice comes out in a whine. Whoops. That sounded like I’m sad about it, which I am definitely not.
“Yeah. A few of the guys are coming over to watch Mountainview’s last game.”
They play their next game this weekend against Mountainview, and Vaughn and the rest of the guys have been brimming with excitement all week.
I nod. “Okay. Study tomorrow night?”
“I’m not sure yet. Dad might have us stay late.”
“All right. Well, I guess I’ll see you when I see you.” I try to sound completely chill about it, but I’m not sure I manage it.
“I’ll see you at school tomorrow,” he says as he grabs his backpack and heads for the front door.
“Right,” I mutter quietly. School.
I am so not good at chill.
As soon as he’s out the door, I let my head drop onto the counter. I cannot be falling for him.