19. Chapter 19 #2
So, once he started down the hall, I waited for a second before following him like a shadow. But, due to being a few steps behind, and also hidden behind the absolute brick wall that was Cameron, I couldn’t see in front of him. But I heard the second he saw the intruders.
“Hey—what the hell are you two doing?” he snapped.
My knees went weak at the idea of two strangers in my house. Maybe I should have stayed in bed.
I froze behind him, my heart pounding so loudly it drowned out everything else. For a full second, I thought we were being robbed. Murdered. Taken hostage. The cult Cameron swore he had escaped found us. Something horrible.
But then I heard it.
Sebastian’s voice. “I told Mattie to be quiet.”
“And I told you to shut the fuck up and let me open the door,” Mattie explained. “Where’s Mason? Is she still in bed?”
Cameron let out a deep sigh. “It’s six am. Everyone else is sleeping.”
“Yeah—but that’s not what I asked,” Mattie said. “I got her breakfast.”
Fuck. Yes.
“I’m right here,” I scooted past Cameron, ignoring the glare he shot me.
Right now, I was getting breakfast, and later I was getting spanked. Today couldn’t get better.
Mattie lit up when she saw me, her whole face brightening like the sun had come up just for her.
My eyes, however, zeroed in on the plastic takeout bag slung over her arm.
Sebastian stood just behind her. Close enough to keep an eye on her. Far enough to make it clear he didn’t want to be anywhere near her if he could help it.
“Are you sick?” I asked.
He shook his head, stifling a yawn and rubbing his eyes like it hurt to be awake. “Your daughter decided sleep was optional.”
I winced. “She’s teething.”
“Yeah, I figured that out around hour four.” He bent down and kissed me. “If you need me, I’m going to bed.”
Sebastian walked past me and Cameron, headed directly for Cam’s room.
“Wait—don’t you work in a few hours?” Cameron turned to face him.
“Tell Lucian to fucking fire me,” Seb said without turning around. “I don’t care.”
That was enough to send Cameron marching after him, already grumbling under his breath, leaving me and Mattie alone.
“Thanks for breakfast,” I said, leaning in to kiss her cheek before heading toward the dining table. She was my only partner who didn’t tower over me, and I liked that. “I hope you got grits, I've been craving them for, like, two days.”
The words slipped easily from my lips, but the weight still felt foreign. Craving. But maybe I was just reading too far into it. After all, Mattie didn’t seem to notice.
She practically skipped after me, a smug smile playing on her lips as she pulled out the first of many to-go containers with a flourish.
“I did. And biscuits, and potatoes, and pancakes, and a fruit cup for balance.”
A feast hidden in white styrofoam. I reached for one of the cups. We got breakfast from this place a lot, so I knew their containers by heart.
“You’re my personal trainer, shouldn’t you tell me not to eat like this?” I asked, pulling it closer.
My fingers twitched around the lid with barely concealed anticipation.
“That’s why I got the fruit cup.” She pointed to another container. “Plus, you know I like watching you suffer at the gym.”
“Sadist,” I muttered, grinning as I peeled off the lid.
She watched me with this almost smug little smile like she knew exactly what she was doing. I stirred the grits, expecting that buttery, cheesy smell I loved. Only… it wasn’t there.
I looked down, expecting the yellow mush Cameron made anytime I asked, but these were lumpy and white. I lifted the container and brought it to my nose before giving it a tentative sniff.
My stomach knotted at the smell of sugar and maple syrup.
“What is this?” I asked, swallowing down the bile creeping up my throat.
“Grits,” Mattie explained as she turned the chair closed to me backward before sitting down.
Her arms rested on the back of the chair, and she cradled her chin, looking at me with a level of adoration she never held for anyone else.
Part of me wondered if I was her first official girlfriend, not that it mattered.
“You said you wanted grits, so I just ordered them how my mom would make’em.” She thickened the slight drawl she normally held.
Her accent wasn’t as thick as Cameron’s and usually easy to ignore or forget, so I knew this was for emphasis.
My shoulders tried to jolt forward in a suppressed gag as I wrestled with the urge to tell Mattie her dead mother was wrong.
“Did I do it wrong?” Mattie’s face fell like a golden retriever who’d been kicked out of bed.
“What? No!” I fought the sick wobble in my voice. “I just–I’ve never seen them like this.”
My lover's expression softened, and she reached forward for another cup.
“I think you’ll like them,” she explained before popping off the lid.
She tipped the cup to the side, causing cut-up strawberries and blueberries to tumble into the slop. For a beat, she mixed the toppings in before taking a bite using my spoon. The now gross-purple goo coated her lower lip, and she swiped her tongue along the surface to clean herself up.
“They’re really good,” she promised, urging me to take a bite.
My lips pulled into a tight-lipped smile, and I took the spoon, more out of love than appetite. The saccharine smell was enough to make my throat close in protest, but the hopeful look in Mattie’s eyes spurred me on.
The white plastic spoon swirled around the cup as I tried to hide my apprehension behind finding the perfect bite. Eventually, I had enough mixing and pulled out a bite full of strawberry chunks.
My saliva thickened as I looked down at the spoon. Right now, it reminded me of frothy milk throw-up with chunks. You know. Exactly something I’d want to have in my mouth.
My eyes darted up to check if Mattie was still watching, and unfortunately, she was. That meant the half-baked plan of throwing them on the ground and pretending the cup fell was out.
Shit.
Okay, it’s just food, Mason. She likes it. She has good taste. It’ll be good.
Those words echoed on loop in my brain as I shoved the spoon in my mouth.
I sucked the spoon clean, but my body refused to swallow. The grits sat on my tongue like a lump of wallpaper paste. The grits were too sweet, and the berry chunks were sour, and it was all too much.
“It’s good, right?” Mattie asked hopefully.
I tried, and I mean really tried, to nod, but the lump on my tongue turned acrid, and my stomach clenched like a fist. My eyes watered as I slapped a hand over my mouth, bolted to the sink, and gagged.
The grits came up before I could stop them, splatting into the basin like the world’s most disgusting paint. The sight alone made me retch harder, yellow bile joining the mauve mess.
Mattie was behind me in an instant, one hand weaving into my hair, the other rubbing circles between my shoulders.
“You’re okay,” she whispered, voice cracking as she patted my back again. “I’ve got you.”
Another gag wracked me. I gripped the sink so hard my fingers went numb, tears blurring my vision. When it finally ended, my shoulders sagged. My throat burned raw, leaving me whimpering as I tried to swallow.
“Mason, I’m so sorry,” Mattie blurted, her words tumbling fast, frantic. “I just wanted to do something nice, like how you made breakfast for me. I thought you’d like this! I should’ve gotten them plain, or asked, or—God, why didn’t I ask? I’m so fucking stupid, I just—”
“Mattie—” I croaked, but she kept going.
“I’ll fix this. You lie down, I’ll go back, I’ll get you whatever you want—” She cut herself off, panic flooding her voice. “Wait—no, you’re sick. That won’t help. Fuck.”
I turned on the faucet, cool water rushing between my fingers. I cupped some into my palms, rinsed my mouth, spat, then washed the sink clean. My breath came uneven, shallow.
“It’s not your fault,” I whispered.
The rambling stopped dead. Silence pressed in behind me.
“Then what is it?”
I stared at the water circling the drain, heart pounding. If I said it, I couldn’t take it back. If I said it, everything changed.
Seb, Cam, Lucian, and Sophia were all stuck with me for better or for worse. A mess of trauma bonds, soul mates, and true love made us an unbreakable polycule, but Mattie wasn’t at that level yet.
Nor did I know if she even wanted to be. So, while I’d love to have her fully integrated and love my found family as much as I did, it wasn’t fair to just expect her to accept this like I could everyone else.
I shut off the water and closed my eyes.
“I’m pregnant.”