Poison and Wine

Chapter Nine Caterina

Although I fought to keep my composure, I couldn’t help trembling at Callum’s outburst. I’d seen him angry, but I hadn’t seen him like this. When he’d abandoned his chair and taken the one next to me, I cowered in my seat. I didn’t know this man, nor did I know what fury he was capable of. While I didn’t think he would physically hurt me, the possibility was there.

Callum flicked his hand at me. “Come closer, Caterina.”

The last thing I wanted to do was answer his command, least of all be any closer to him. So, I inched my chair slightly towards him. A low growl rumbled in his chest. Reaching over, he grabbed the arm of my chair and tugged it with all his strength.

A gasp flew from my lips as my body flailed in the chair. “Must you continue to manhandle me?”

“Must you continue to disobey every command I give you?”

I jerked my chin up at him. “I answer to no man. Not even to my father.”

“You will answer to me.”

“Over my dead body,” I bit out.

Callum’s dark blue eyes turned almost black as he stared at me with absolute venom. When he whirled out of his chair, I flinched in fear that he was going to hit me. Instead, he stalked past me over to the side table that held the liquor. With a shaky hand, he poured himself a rather large glass of what I imagined was whiskey.

After he downed the glass in three long gulps, Callum stared up at the ceiling. He sucked in a harsh breath before exhaling slowly. When he turned back to me, his expression remained slightly murderous. “I don’t know if it’s the same for Made Men, but in Irish Clans, we don’t hurt women. They’re considered innocents. They’re to be protected and cared for at all costs.” He swallowed another gulp of whiskey. “But you…it’s taking everything within me not to hurt you, Caterina.”

“Am I supposed to thank you for that?”

Like a snake striking out at its prey, Callum lunged from the whiskey cart over to me. Grabbing me by the shoulders, his fingers twisted into my flesh. I didn’t dare give him the satisfaction of crying out. Instead, I raised my chin and stared him down.

A few tense seconds ticked by where I wondered if I’d finally gone too far. And then as he stared down at his hands on me, a look of disbelief flashed on Callum’s face. He jerked away from me and spun back around to the whiskey cart.

While his back rose and fell in harsh pants, I pinched my eyes shut as I tried regulating my own breathing. The sound of his voice caused me to jump. “Despite neither one of us wanting it, this marriage is happening. We have to find a way to coexist without killing each other.”

A mirthless laugh bubbled from my lips. “What could possibly induce me into wanting to work on a marriage with my kidnapper?”

Callum turned around and shot me a pointed look. “I know the real reason why you joined the religious order.”

In spite of the cold chill that reverberated down my spine, I fought to keep my body or face from reacting. “Because I had a calling to serve God.”

With a shark-like smile, he then tsked at me. “Come now. It’s one thing to lie before me—” He paused to point his finger at the ceiling, “but it’s quite another to lie before him.”

“Only he knows my heart.”

Gripping the arms of the chair, Callum loomed over me, his face only inches away from mine. “I know more than you could ever imagine.”

I licked my lips. “Such as?”

“You joined the order to escape an arranged marriage.”

Nervous laughter trilled from my lips. “That’s absurd. If I didn’t want to get married, I could’ve just run away.”

Callum shook his head. “You know as well as I do you were a caged animal, Kitten. If you had ever managed to escape, they would’ve dragged you right back. Even if you changed your name or your hair or even went to the extreme and got plastic surgery, they would’ve eventually found you and forced you back.”

When I didn’t respond, he quirked his brows at me. “The only choice you had at any freedom was to join the order. Even a man with a soul as black as your father’s still harbors a little fear of God, and he would fear him too much to steal you from Him.”

“How could you possibly know?” I whispered.

Anguish marred Callum’s handsome features. “Because of my sister.”

“What do you mean?”

“The reason why I killed my father was because he promised our seventeen-year-old-sister to a pedophile whose kink was beating young girls.”

“He sounds like Carmine,” I murmured.

“Except he didn’t get the chance to actually hurt you like Oisinn did my sister.”

My breath hitched in my chest. “That’s why you killed your father?”

“Aye.” His fingers traced the rim of his whiskey glass. “My brothers and I tried to talk him out of the arrangement, but he wouldn’t listen to reason. When Maeve threatened to run away to avoid the marriage, he ordered Dare, Quinn, and I to beat her.”

I widened my eyes in horror. “That’s horrible.”

“It was. Of course, we refused, which only enraged my father further.”

“Is that when you killed him?”

A haunted look entered Callum’s dark blue eyes. “I should’ve done it then. If I had, it would’ve saved Maeve from what he allowed that bastard Oisinn to do to her.”

I gasped. “He beat her in your stead?”

Agony overcame Callum’s face. The emotions swirling within him must’ve been overwhelming because he didn’t speak for several moments. The anguished whisper that came from him caused my stomach to roll. “He destroyed her.”

My hand flew to my mouth as I fought the bile rising in my throat. No, it couldn’t be. A father could never willingly allow such a thing to happen to his daughter. “Your father let him…” Unable to say the word, I swallowed hard. “Hurt her?”

Callum gave a slight jerk of his head. “Instead of protecting her in her hour of need, the bastard held a gun to Kellan and my youngest brother, Eamon’s, heads and forced them to hold her down while Oisin raped her.”

Desperate agony rippled through my chest as I didn’t fight the tears streaking down my cheeks. I swallowed my sobs as I couldn’t even form thoughts to imagine the horrors that Maeve endured at her father’s bidding. Then I thought of sweet Kellan being forced to do such a thing, and a sob tore from my lips. My heart broke for him as well.

Callum had been made out to be a monster for murdering his father when all this time he’d merely been avenging his sister. After wiping my cheeks, I reached out with a shaky hand to touch his shoulder. At the touch, he stared at me in surprise. “Callum, there’s nothing I can possibly say, but please know I’m so very sorry. For Mave and for Kellan and Eamon.” I swallowed hard. “And for you.”

He cocked his brows at me. “Does that mean you absolve me of the sin of killing my father?”

“While it’s not for me to forgive, you had more than enough reasons to do it.” When I thought of the torture Maeve had endured and the potential that I faced with Carmine, I whispered, “More than that, I’m glad you did it.”

“You are?”

I nodded. “I know my brothers would do the same.”

Tilting his head at me, he said, “I didn’t think things were so strained in your family.”

“Let’s just say that when it comes to my father, they’re willing to do exactly what you did.” To Callum”s surprise, I said, “They’ve always hated the idea of me in the order. They were willing to take my father out to give me my freedom.”

A smirk curved across his lips. “I can imagine I just made three new enemies then by kidnapping you.”

“I would imagine you have.”

“After we have the chance to speak, I’m sure I can get them to see things more favorably.”

“Don’t count on it.”

As Callum went to get another drink, I couldn’t help asking, “What happened to your sister?”

“She’s a sophomore at Trinity College in Dublin.”

“You didn’t marry her off when she turned eighteen?”

Callum’s jaw tensed. “We won’t be marrying her off period. If she ever decides she wants to get married, she’ll do the choosing.”

“That’s very progressive of you. Not to mention you’re allowing her to get an education.”

After sliding back into his chair, Callum eyed me curiously. “Did you want to go to university?”

With my chest constricting, I glanced down at my lap. “Very much.”

“What did you want to study?”

I snapped my surprised gaze back to Callum’s. I couldn’t help being surprised by his question. Men in the world I’d grown up in didn’t appreciate educated women. “You really want to know?”

“Aye.”

Chewing on my lip, I debated telling him. For some reason, it felt like I was stripping myself bare in front of him. Other than my brothers, I’d never spoken it aloud to anyone. “At the very minimum, I wanted to be a nurse, but in my wildest dreams, I wanted to become a doctor and serve with Doctors Without Borders.”

“Somehow I could see you as a nurse.”

“Really?”

“You have a natural compassion about you.”

“Just not with you, right?” I teasingly asked.

Callum chuckled. “In your defense, I don’t bring out the best in you.”

“That’s true.”

“Is your desire to be a nurse the reason why you became a missionary novice?”

“Yes and no. I wanted to travel to help people, but I also wanted to put as much distance between my father and the man he wanted me to marry.”

“That’s understandable.” He then quirked his brows at me. “Would you still want to pursue a degree?”

My heartbeat accelerated at his words, and I fought the urge to pinch myself. Was he actually alluding to what I thought he was? “More than anything in the world.”

With a quick nod of his head, Callum replied, “Then I don’t see anything wrong with you pursuing a degree as my wife.”

“Please don’t tease me right now.”

“I’m not.”

“You would actually let me go to college?”

“Yes.” He tilted his head at me. “Obviously, you would have to commute. I sure as hell wouldn’t allow you to live away from me.”

“I’d be fine with that.”

“Then it’s settled. If you willingly consent to marrying me, you may go to university. And as long as it doesn’t fuck up being a supportive wife and mother, I don’t see any reason why you can’t pursue a career.”

I blinked at him. I was too shocked to do anything else. Surely I was dreaming. Callum agreed that not only could I earn a degree, but I could work. It had to be too good to be true. “Will you put that in writing?”

The corners of his lips twitched. “Don’t you trust me?”

“That shouldn’t be too shocking considering you’re the leader of an enemy family who I’ve only known for three days.”

“Fine, Kitten. I’ll have our attorney draw up the necessary papers.”

Although a part of me said not to press my luck, I decided to go with my gut. “There’s something else I want to negotiate.”

Callum scowled at me around the lip of his whiskey tumbler. “Isn’t me letting you go to university enough?” When I shook my head, he sighed. “What is it?”

“You just mentioned me being a mother.”

As the words left my lips, an image of my belly swelling with Callum’s child flooded my mind. After I’d joined the order, I’d buried the idea of ever becoming a mother. At the time, it had been a hard pill to swallow. But in the span of just a couple of days, the possibility was back on the table. Of course, that meant I would have to conceive it with Callum. At the thought of doing that with him, my cheeks flushed.

Amusement twinkled in his eyes at what must’ve been my apparent embarrassment. “Yes, Kitten, I will need heirs.” Tilting his head at me, he added, “As a Catholic, I’m sure you won’t object to not using birth control.”

With a scowl, I replied, “There are gray areas when it comes to my faith.”

“You would deny me children?”

“That’s not what I meant. I love children, and before I entered the order, I always wanted to have them.

“Then what could possibly be the problem.”

“I don’t want to become your breeding machine.”

A laugh burst from Callum’s lips. “A breeding machine?”

“Don’t mock me.”

“I’m not.”

“Are you denying that by not using birth control, you’ll keep me pregnant all the time?”

With a cocky smirk, Callum replied, “You must think I’m a hell of a virile bastard if I’ll be constantly knocking you up.”

“I merely assumed an Irishmen’s sexual drive is the same as an Italian’s.” Pursing my lips at him, I countered, “But I could be wrong about your abilities.”

Lust glittered in his blue eyes as he closed the distance between us. “Never doubt my abilities to make you purr, Kitten.”

Rolling my eyes, I tried shoving him back from me, but he didn’t budge. “You’re disgusting.”

As Callum leaned closer to me, his breath warmed against the sensitive skin near my ear. “You won’t always think that way.” His lips brushed against my ear. “Someday soon I’m going to make you beg for my cock and scream my name.”

A shiver rippled through me at his words, and this time it wasn’t from disgust. His words and overwhelming presence seemed to awaken long-dormant feelings. Feelings I had never imagined I would ever experience again after I entered the order.

Feigning indifference to the effect of his words, I countered, “Can we please focus?”

He eased back in his chair with a cocky smirk. “What else did you want to say about breeding?”

With an exasperated huff, I crossed my arms over my chest. “I will give you heirs, but I get to choose how many.”

“Why is it only your choice?”

“Because it’s my body going through the pregnancy, and my body going through the birth.”

“Aye, and your beautiful cunt getting ravaged in the delivery,” he teased.

My eyes bulged in horror while my hand involuntarily came up to slap his cheek. His hand caught mine. Instead of being angry, he merely winked. “Put the claws away, Kitten. They have the opposite effect on me than you think.”

I jerked my hand away from his. “You shouldn’t speak that way to me when I’m still considered a sister.”

Amusement twinkled in Callum’s blue eyes. “Does that mean I can when we’re married?”

“I would prefer you didn’t.”

“Sorry, Kitten, but I won’t make any promises.”

I fought the urge to call him a bastard. Instead, I stared down at my hands. I knew there was one more thing I desperately needed clarity on before I could ever say I do. When I looked up, I found Callum staring intently at me.

He raised a dark brow at me. “What is it you want to say to me?”

“Am I that obvious?”

“I’m just good at reading people.”

I shifted in my chair. “There’s one last request I need to make.”

“Jesus, woman, what else can there possibly be?”

“Something that’s more important even than me going to school and having a career.”

Callum eased back in his chair while narrowing his eyes at me. “What is it?”

I knew what I was about to ask could potentially send Callum into a rage. While I shouldn’t have cared about his reaction, I still nervously fingered the hem of my dress. I knew his response would soil all the other promises he’d made.

At the feel of his fingers on my chin, I jumped. “Out with it, Kitten.”

I nodded. “If we have a daughter, I want you to promise me you’ll never arrange a marriage for her. Just as Maeve has the freedom to choose, I want the same for my daughter or daughters.”

Without missing a beat, Callum quickly replied, “You have my word.”

Surprise flooded me. “Just like that and no arguments?”

“I would’ve thought you wouldn’t have to ask after what I told you about Maeve.”

“That was your sister where this will be your daughter. Because she belongs directly to you, her marriage would be worth more when it came to power and position.”

“I will still honor her freedom.”

For reasons I couldn’t understand, pride bloomed in my chest. Pride that came from the fact the man who would be my husband respected his future daughter or daughters enough to care that they had freedom over their lives. “You can’t imagine how pleased it makes me to hear you say that.”

“It surprises you that I would agree?”

A shy smile tugged at the corners of my lips. “Considering your reputation, it is a surprise. But a good one.”

“I may be a monster to my enemies, but I’ll never be the evil bastard that my father was. In spite of not having the best role model, I know I can love a child. More than that, I know I would never want to hurt my child.”

“Thank you.” I stared intently into his eyes. “Even though I don’t know you well, I don’t think you would ever willingly hurt a child either.”

“Before you give too many compliments, you must know this. While I’ll do everything within my power to keep them safe, our sons will be brought up in the family.”

I sighed. “I imagined as much.”

“And you don’t object?”

“Would you change your mind if I did?”

“No.”

“Then there’s no point. While it’s not what I would want for them, I understand what they’re being born into. After all, they’ll inherit it from both sides of their family.”

“I’m glad you can see it that way.”

With a teasing smile, I countered, “Maybe it’s more that I’ll be lighting candles to be blessed with only daughters.”

Callum barked out a laugh. “Do what you must, Sister, but considering the amount of sons in my family, the odds aren’t in your favor.”

“I suppose we’ll just have to wait and see.”

“Speaking of conceiving children, I feel we should discuss our wedding night.”

Apprehension rocketed through me. Of all the aspects of a marriage to Callum, the physical side unnerved me the most. After joining the order, I’d never imagined sex with anyone, least of all a man who abducted me. As someone with no experience with men, it was a matter of extreme apprehension. “W-What about it?”

“I just wanted to ease your mind that I won’t be expecting us to consummate the marriage on our wedding night.”

A gasp escaped my lips as surprise shuddered through me. “You’re not?”

“I’m a bastard, but not that big of a bastard to force a nun into sex with a stranger.”

As I processed his words, I couldn’t help thinking there was more he wasn’t saying. Although our families were different nationalities, rules were similar. In the mafia world, he would be my husband, and it would be within his rights to expect me to consummate the marriage. Even if I said no, it wouldn’t be considered rape. “It’s about your sister, isn’t it?”

His expression darkened. “What about her?”

“The reason you won’t force me on our wedding night–or any night for that matter–is because of what happened to Maeve,” I said softly.

“You owe more to the suffering of that poor girl than you can ever imagine,” he grunted.

It hit me then. The unusual kindness he and his brothers had shown me was also because of Maeve. I swallowed hard. “I realize how indebted I am to her, and for what it is worth, I’m grateful.”

“I’m glad you realize it.”

An uncomfortable silence penetrated the air after the mention of Maeve. I cleared my throat. “When can I sign the contract?”

“I’ll type up what we discussed and send it to our attorney tonight. I should have a copy in the morning.”

“Good.”

Before I could rise out of my chair, his hand came over mine. At the mischievous glint burning in his eyes, a shudder ran through me. “Until then, I know another way we could seal the deal.”

“How?”

“With a kiss.”

“I think a handshake would suffice.”

“You never know. I might throw something in the contract about a summer study abroad if you kiss me now.”

My eyes popped wide. “You’re trying to bribe me to kiss you?”

“I’m a businessman, Caterina.”

Leaning over, Callum slid his hands around my waist. The heat from his body singed my skin through my dress. Before I could shove him away, he rose to his feet, pulling me up with him. His whiskey-laced breath warmed my cheek, sending a shiver rippling through me. “Surrender a little of yourself to me, Caterina.”

“No! You don’t get to kiss me until we’re married,” I protested as I fought to escape his embrace.

“Says who?” he questioned, as he kissed a moist trail down my neck.

I tried ignoring the electricity dancing along my skin that his lips were producing. “T-That’s how it’s done in my w-world.”

Callum’s lips froze on my collar bone. He then pulled away to stare down at me with eyes glittering with lust. “But you’re in my world now, Kitten.”

As I pinched my eyes shut, I pleaded, “If we’re going to do this, then let’s do it right. Honor my tradition.”

A few moments passed where my heart threatened to beat out of my chest. At his frustrated grunt, I popped open my eyes. He glared back at me. “I should take what’s mine regardless of your pleading.”

“I’m not yours. Not even after we’re married,” I protested in a whisper.

Callum’s lips hovered close to my own. A part of me wanted nothing more than for him to take what was allegedly his. I wanted to feel his lips on mine; the wet heat of his tongue against mine. I hated that I was experiencing feelings like that for him.

“You are mine, Kitten. You’ll take my name, sleep in my bed, and one day very soon, you’ll take my cock.” He licked his lips as if savoring the thought of us sleeping together. “When I put my baby in your belly, you’ll even carry a part of me inside you.”

Both disgust and longing rippled through me at his words. “Let me go.”

With a smirk, he shoved away from me. “Once again, you may have won this battle, Kitten, but I’ll win the war.”