Chapter April 1, 2000 - Meadow
Poison Wood Therapeutic Academy for Girls
Kisatchie National Forest
Meadow
Dear Diary,
I am so mad. One of these girls is stealing my jewelry. My diamond earrings are gone. Ok, so I wasn’t supposed to bring those here but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to hide them in my bags. I mean diamonds are a girls best friend, right? Isn’t that what Audrey Hepburn said or some old lady like that.
Anyway, I’ve got an idea of who’s stealing so I’m going to go through her stuff later. If these girls think they are better thieves than me they’re in for a rude awakening.
April Fool’s bitches.
And as if this place isn’t bad enough, our new headmaster says we have to do laundry. All the laundry!!!
Oh, did I tell you about our new headmaster?
Apparently this school can’t keep one around for longer than a few months.
The first lady has already quit. This guy is British and has this accent and says things like “spot of tea” and shit.
He’s such an idiot. His name is Archibald something but you-know-who called him Baldy to his face!
She has detention now. She doesn’t know what I know.
You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.