Chapter 24
CHAPTER 24
TATIANA
I am so angry. Immeasurably so. When Angeline laid out the facts, I couldn’t argue with them. She was describing my situation perfectly and if I am angry with anyone, it’s myself.
Titus knows no different. He was probably brought up this way and believes a snatched moment of pleasure, a kind word and soft touch is all it takes to win a woman’s heart. Until now it was, and I’m the fool who fell for it.
Now my eyes have opened and I don’t like what I see.
I’m aware I have no other choice than to play the game, but I will play it on my terms. What those are is undecided, but it hasn’t escaped my attention that I am safer with Titus. When the police officer showed me the images of Leo’s apartment, I felt sick. He was planning to abduct me, to do God knows what, and would have been successful had it not been for Titus’s men bursting in and saving me.
Now he is gone, so has the threat and I disturb the silence by saying, “I would like to return to my apartment.”
“For what reason?” His voice is steady and unemotional, and I adopt the same tone with my reply. “Leo is gone. There is no reason to worry about my stalker anymore. It’s my personal space and I am comfortable there.”
“You’re not comfortable around me.”
If I detect a tinge of hurt in his voice, I’m probably mistaken and shrug. “This is a business arrangement, nothing more. You made that pretty obvious tonight and when business is finished for the day, we return home. I wish to return to mine and to the Bolshoi in the morning.”
I turn and note his eyes glittering in the darkness and almost back out of this altercation, but the fire is burning inside me so I snap, “I am a dancer you are a businessman. You do your job. Let me do mine.”
Once again, he says nothing and I fill the silence with anger.
“I will play your game for whatever your reasons are, but I will not sacrifice my soul in the process. I’m unaware what you want from me, Titus, but I’m guessing it’s my public profile, so in public I’ll play the loving fiancée and in private I will nurture my lying soul.”
“So, the interview and your declaration of love?” He cocks his brow and I shrug.
“I’m an actress as well as a dancer and that woman was seriously annoying me. I did what was required, and it apparently did the job, so you’re welcome. Give me a raise.”
I’m being uncharacteristically bitter, disguising the hurt inside me as I battle him with words. Tonight opened my eyes, and I didn’t like what I saw. I wasn’t kidding. I need to be alone to take stock of the situation and I’m a little shocked when he nods, with no expression at all and taps on the glass between us and the driver. The partition lowers, and he says evenly, “Miss Pavlov wishes to return home to her apartment.”
He settles back and retrieves his phone, leaving me with the consequences of my decision as we speed off into the darkened night.
It’s strange returning to my apartment. Almost as if I’ve never been away and as Titus walks me to the door, the silence between us is more devastating to my heart than I realized it would be.
He doesn’t care.
He made no attempt to talk me around. To explain his behavior and apologize. He believes he has done nothing wrong, and that is more damaging than anything. He is just like Boris Fedorov. Cold, calculating and unemotional.
We head into my apartment and I watch with growing sadness as he checks it’s safe and says smoothly, “There are cameras installed at the entrance of the building, the hallways and the windows. My security team is monitoring them and if anyone attempts to come within meters of your apartment an alarm will sound and my men will be alerted in seconds.
“Seconds?” I’m stunned. I never knew he had planned any of this and he nods, no apology in his voice as he says unemotionally, “I have a team nearby. All the time you are here, they will be outside. When you head to the Bolshoi, they will be outside, so if there is any threat, it will be dealt with.”
I have no words, just mounting confusion. If anything, I’m touched that he has considered my safety at all and then I’m reminded of what this is. I am a valuable commodity in his life right now, for whatever his reasons are. My safety means the plan runs its course, so I nod with resignation heavy in my heart.
“Thank you.”
I almost believe he is going to say something because he hesitates before clearing his throat. “Good night, Tia.”
“Goodnight, Titus.”
As he leaves with no softened smile in my direction or a lingering gaze, I watch the door long after it closes with a deep sense of sadness. I was right. This is merely business for him and the pleasure was just a by-product of that. Titus Romanov could have any woman he wants. I just happened to be the one beside him at the time.
I secure the bolts in place and turn, staring around my small apartment with tears in my eyes. I wanted to come home. To familiarity and to reset my emotions. Then why do I wish I was with him now?
When the cold fingers of the morning air wake me, it’s exactly one hour after I finally fell asleep. Nothing in my life makes sense anymore, and I spent a fitful night tossing in my bed as I struggled to make sense of it all. Leo, Titus, Nadia and Boris all corrupted my thoughts. I have fallen down a dark hole, holding the hand of the one man who has ever caused my heart to beat faster and my body to fall apart under his touch.
I was screaming inside for his touch last night as I writhed under the sheets, regretting my bold stand for dignity. To hell with that when it’s the wild abandonment I crave instead, knowing what he was planning; what I would finally learn the secret of. I sabotaged my own happiness out of pride, and I hated my decision as my body mourned the loss of more pleasure than it could stand.
He haunted my vision when I closed my eyes and I almost gave in and called him to come and get me. To make up something that frightened me so he would charge over here to rescue the princess. Then I hated my thoughts and my head was back in charge, telling me I had made the right decision and to hell with them all.
I shower in the small cramped space before pulling on my thick leggings and jumper, preparing to take the train to the Bolshoi. I always grab a coffee on the way and drink it on the train while I merge with the rest of civilization as everyone heads to work as standard.
However, when I step outside my apartment, a black car is waiting for me and the driver standing by the door nods with respect.
“Good morning, Miss Pavlov. I am here to make sure you reach your destination safely.”
I’m almost tempted to decline, but the wind is bitter today and snow is forecast. The car is warm and comfortable and so I forego my principles for my own reasons and smile gratefully.
“Thank you.”
The scent of leather greets me and I wonder if this car is new. It certainly has that feeling about it, and I’m happy to discover the seats are heated as I settle into it.
I lean back and allow myself a moment’s thought about the man who owns it and picture him at his dining table in his luxurious apartment, dressed for business, dressed to take over the world.
I’m shocked when the car stops and the window opens and a voice says, “What can I get you?”
I blink when I notice the drive through coffee shop and I hate to admit how touched I am.
“Um, an espresso please and–” I tap on the partition and as the glass slides down, I ask, “What can I get you?”
“I’m good, but thank you for asking.” Is his polite response and I smile at the woman who is staring with awe into the car.
“That will be all, thank you.”
“Any pastries?”
I consider it because I haven’t eaten at all and my stomach is reminding me of that, but such luxuries are costly and I don’t want to admit I’m struggling this month for spare cash.
“It’s fine. Thank you.”
The driver interrupts.
“One of everything, please.”
He hands the woman his credit card, and she grins, the envy in her expression directed firmly on me.
As our order is fulfilled at the next window, the scent of baked products fills the car and as I make to hand the driver the bag, he says gruffly, “They are for you—boss’s orders.”
“For me?” I’m stunned and say quickly, “Please, I can’t eat all of this. Will you help me out?”
‘’I’m good, thanks.” He replies courteously and as we pull away into the rush hour traffic, the partition rises and I lean back with a soft smile on my face because this is a pleasure I wouldn’t have missed for the world.