Chapter Seventeen #2
Kaiden had never been into religion. It always seemed to point out how he deserved the lot he got in life, and asking questions about it only caused problems. It didn’t help that his family was lazy in their convictions.
They rarely attended church, never read scripture, but always pulled out the importance of God when judging the gays.
Or any group, so long as it didn’t condemn the rest of the family in the process.
“My folks believe very much in letting their kids learn spirituality on their own terms,” Rus explained. “They let me attend when I had a friend who pushed me into Christianity. But eventually, I found him to be hypocritical and the bible itself to be flawed beyond repair.”
“So, you got this tattoo?”
“Mostly I just like the flames.” Rus flexed his bicep and forearm as Kaiden continued trailing his fingers down Rus’ arm.
He traced the lines of the muscles until he reached Rus’ wrist and paused at the tattooed Valentine’s Day date.
“Anniversary?” Kaiden asked. “I suppose that’s better than an ex’s name.”
“No,” Rus answered. “I mean, it’s sort of connected to my ex but… Okay, well, weirdly, all the men in my family were born on holidays.”
Kaiden listened attentively, not sure how this tied to Rus’ ex.
“I was born on April first, which is why my life sometimes feels like a joke,” Rus said with a laugh.
“My dad was born on Father’s Day, which changes every year, yada yada, but it’s a big deal to him.
His sign from the universe that he was meant to be a dad or whatever.
My granddad was born on the fourth of July, which is why he’s such a patriot and why we don’t waste our breath on that red hat cunt.
My brother was born on New Year's Eve. Got some uncles with major holiday birthdays and weird, unknown holidays. Like some of those military remembrance holidays conservatives always complain about needing but never remember the fact they have existed for fucking decades.”
“Interesting.” Kaiden scrunched his face a bit pensively. “How is that connected to your last relationship exactly?”
“Ah, yeah,” Rus fumbled for his words. “You ready for a big, ugly truth bomb?”
“Always,” Kaiden replied with a bit of intrigue, and a twinge of concern. Mostly, his attention remained rapt.
“I was a high school statistic,” Rus said. “Lana got pregnant our junior year. It was a whole mess of a thing. She chose to keep the pregnancy, and we went back and forth about being parents. I was excited, ish. Nervous as fuck, too. But in the end, Lana chose to put the kid up for adoption.”
“Oh,” Kaiden said, unable to muster anything else.
He expected… He didn’t know what he expected from this truth bomb. Something about his previous relationship for sure, but not something tied to a kid. Rus had a child. Or he had had a child.
“Were you okay with her giving up your kid?”
“That’s the thing; he was never really mine,” Rus said with a sad smile. “He always belonged to the couple who adopted him. Just like I always belonged to my parents.”
Kaiden stared silently, processing.
“It’s where Lana got the idea,” Rus explained. “I’m adopted. My folks are amazing, and I was very lucky. Not all adoptions are… Hmm. That’s a whole other tangent. Let’s just say that just because someone wants to be a parent doesn’t always mean they should.”
Kaiden sat up, crisscrossing his legs and offering Rus a spot on his lap. He took the offering, laying his head on Kaiden’s thigh and staring up at the ceiling.
“It messed with my head, having the kid but not having him. Like, I don’t regret it now, but in high school, I was mad at everyone. It didn’t help that Lana iced me out afterward, dealing with her own baggage for sure. Then she left and toured Europe to find herself.”
“And that’s why you didn’t date anyone for such a long time.”
“I had to find myself, too.” Rus stared up at Kaiden, his beautiful hazel eyes a bit glossy. “Turns out, I’m slowly finding myself in you and Dylan.”
“You’re sweet.”
“You’re comfort.”
Kaiden leaned down, kissing Rus’ forehead and enjoying the silence together.
Their moment was quickly interrupted by a swift succession of buzzes from Kaiden’s phone.
“Ugh.” Kaiden grabbed it, swiped away from the flurry of texts, and switched it to silent.
“Who’s that?”
“Stepfather.”
Rus glowered.
“Ready for my truth bomb?” Kaiden asked with a chuckle. “It’s not nearly as serious.”
Rus’ expression shifted to something calm and curious.
“The electric is due,” Kaiden said. “They need money to pay it.”
“They can go fuck themselves,” Rus retorted. “Didn’t you just pay for the month?”
“That’s for room and board.” Kaiden scoffed, hating how much he spent to share a room. More like to hide in the basement at this point. “Honestly, if I don’t pay it, it’ll screw me over, too. Trust me, no electricity would suck. I’ve done it before.”
“I hate your family.”
“Me too,” Kaiden replied a little too casually.
It almost frightened him how easily that slipped out. He paused, trying to think about what he loved from his family, moments or bonds or something significant. He truly couldn’t find anything of importance that linked him to those people other than blood and pain and hate.
“I’ve always had to cover utilities,” Kaiden explained. “My stepfather pisses through money the second he gets it, so there’s never anything left when due dates roll around.”
“You should leave.”
“Easier said than done.”
“The apartments here are way cheaper.”
“They’re for students.”
“No, these are off campus,” Rus countered.
“They give students a nice discount because we usually pay for the whole semester. It really depends on a person’s financial aid package, but yeah.
They rent to anyone, though. Most of the folks living here are just looking for affordable housing. This is the closest thing to it.”
“Yeah…”
“Look, I’m not suggesting you move into my place; that would be weird and a little too soon. But the complex is huge. Like, seven apartment buildings huge.”
And each three-story building housed close to thirty residents.
“Weird? Psst. I practically live here already,” Kaiden said with a laugh.
“Truth!”
“But I’m going to pass on the complex,” Kaiden answered. “I have a plan. It’s just going to take a minute to come together.”
And he did have a plan. He just didn’t know if it was possible, truly possible, on his own. But Kaiden wanted to prove he could do something on his own. That he didn’t need rescuing, and he didn’t need his family.
“Promise you won’t let them walk all over you?” Rus scooted away some, then pulled Kaiden down so he’d lay beside him again.
“I promise.”
“Good, because I’m one flippant comment away from popping everyone in that damn house of yours across their smug little faces.”
Kaiden burst into laughter, burying his face into Rus’ chest. “I would pay to see that.”
“Free of charge,” Rus said, slapping Kaiden’s butt. “Well, not entirely free.”
They fell into each other, cuddling the entire morning away, enjoying synchronized breathing and the silence of content comfort in each other’s arms.