Chapter 48
Forty-Eight
ELLIS
We were—are—on the verge of something amazing. I'm just having a really hard time believing that when the two people we have developed feelings for are brushing us off.
For two days in a row, Violet has declined our request to hang out. I even offered to go to her apartment with food, and she flat out said no.
She did say thank you, so she must not be mad at us. But who knows what else could be wrong. Valentine’s Day was the most incredible night of our lives. She even said so herself, and now it feels like she's pulling back.
Jamie too. Neither of them have sent me and Nate much more than short, unreliable messages.
Violet leaves tomorrow. Her only lengthy message to the group chat was to let us know that her deadline moved up and she has to leave a week earlier than planned.
Jamie didn't say anything in response, and judging by their synced response time, I'm guessing they're together.
Are they talking shit about us? Have they decided they don't want us? Is Jamie leaving tomorrow with her and disappearing like Violet did the last time? Did they find out about what we did?
I'm spiraling.
"You're in love."
Glancing at Nate, I frown when I see him watching me. I've been pacing for a while and checking my phone repeatedly. "Obviously," I retort. He knows I love him.
He chuckles, but I see the worry lines around his eyes and mouth that haven't disappeared all day. "I mean, you wouldn't be this worked up if you weren't in love with them, Ellis. Jamie and Violet."
Scoffing, I go back to pacing. It feels good to do something because I'm pretty fucking useless otherwise.
I still don't have a job, and we've been here for months.
We may not be hurting for money, and I know I'm helpful to Nate with his business, but I'm literally doing nothing with my life besides pining over two people who clearly don't fucking want me.
"Ellis, you need to stop. Your brain is going to destroy you if you let it." Nate's voice is soft, and it grates on my nerves.
"I don't need to stop. I need them to break it off with us if that's what they want to do!"
Nate stands up from the couch and approaches me like I might bite him. His posture and tone are strong, though. "Enough. I know this is bringing up some horrible shit, and I don't blame you. I'm worried and a bit self-conscious too, but there are many things that could be happening."
Fear twists my gut, forcing me to blurt out, "Oh my god, do you think one of them is hurt? Should we go over there? I can't believe I thought the worst again. Fuck!"
Just as I'm whirling around to grab the keys, Nate grabs my bicep and pulls me back. "El, breathe. You're losing it a little. Not everyone is used to being in constant contact with each other."
I cough with the force of my inhale, and release it shakily. "Fuck. Okay. I can’t pinpoint why I'm so anxious. We are so close to being more, you know?"
He nods and swallows. Our phones ping at the exact same time, and I swear to hell my heart tries to fling itself from my body.
I reread the message over and over again, trying to use logic and not be swallowed by insecurities all over again. It's not working, so I repeat the message out loud even though Nate has already read it over my shoulder.
"So she's on her period and that's why they've been distant?" It even sounds stupid coming out of my mouth. My anger flares at the excuse, and when I turn to tell Nate it's bullshit, I see a similar frown on his face. Only his looks a little more thoughtful.
Another message comes through, and I read it out loud again, ready to tear into Jamie for dodging us while using feminine shit as an excuse. But his message takes the wind out of my sails.
"He said she has severe cramping, nausea, headaches, and is exhausted. He did some research and thinks it could be dysmenorrhea, but Violet rolled her eyes and kicked him out of her room. Now he's making her dinner." I reread. "She's like really not feeling well, then..."
I'm such a fucking dick. I need to do something about the anxiety I have. Nate thinks it's a response to losing Violet when we were younger, but Jesus, I'm thirty years old, I shouldn't be reacting so immaturely.
Before either Nate or I can say a word, my phone blares with an incoming video call from Violet. I'm so quick to answer I almost hit decline. My heart is pounding, and Nate is plastered against me to fit on the screen.
Violet finally loads onto the screen, looking sleepy and pale in the low lighting of her bedroom. "Hey guys, I'm so sorry."
She sniffles, and I try to work out a way to kick my own ass in my head. Cursing myself out silently, I ache at the tear that slips down her cheek.
"It's okay, baby. Jamie told us what was going on." Nate is quick to soothe her.
She groans and moves her face away from the screen. I have half a mind to elbow Nate in the gut for making her go away, but she's back quickly. "That dick. He's been smothering me with heating pads and chocolate."
"Why didn't you ask us to help?" There go my insecurities again. Did she not want us to help her?
Violet wipes her cheeks. "Well, I didn't ask Jamie either. He just showed up yesterday when I wasn't answering my phone. I was taking a hot bath and left it in my room because the screen was hurting my head."
"Are your periods always this bad?" I ask because I have two younger sisters, and they never spoke a peep about their cramps or anything like that. It's also possible I tuned it out.
Violet shuffles around in her bed and lies on her side, taking us with her. "Yeah. Some are worse than others. Stress can affect them too. I'm used to it, but driving tomorrow and the next day will be a pain."
"Can't you stay?" Nate worries, probably ready to lock her in a room and feed her all her cravings with Jamie.
"No," Violet sighs, sounding exhausted. "This is my high profile client, and I at least need to have three good images to her by Friday. Three days isn't a lot of time, so I have to be on the road early."
I can hear Nate grinding his teeth behind me, so I speak up since I'd rather he not go all caveman on her. "Maybe one of us should come with you?"
Please say yes, please say yes.
"No," she declines. "Really, I'll be okay. Jamie's packing for me, so I know I'll have everything I need to get through the drive. And I'll be driving all day tomorrow with my heated seat on my lower back, which sounds heavenly."
I don't like it.
"I don't like this," Nate grumbles my exact thought.
Violet laughs a little, and it lights me up inside. I love her. "Too bad, big guy. Boss Ellis around instead for a while. You can borrow my Ferri."
Narrowing my eyes at the little minx, I say, "That's rude as hell, Bubbles."
All three of us suck in a breath at the same time, and I immediately want the ground to swallow me whole. How could I be so careless again? "Violet. Shit. I'm so sorry. I didn't—"
"No," she rushes out. "No, it-it's okay. I think—You can call me that."
"Really?" I'm fucking stunned. She has been so against us calling her that she's even had physical negative reactions to it. Why is it okay now?
Her eyes sparkle with emotion through the phone. "I feel like I'm getting some of those bubbles back, and you helped me manifest them. It feels right."
I could cry. I really, really fucking could. Instead of saying something epic or beautiful, I joke, "SO does that make me the bubble maker?"
Violet snorts an unladylike sound that has me smiling so big I decide I don't regret my stupid mouth. I have no filter, but I'll opt never to have one again if it makes her laugh.
Nate squeezes my hip, and Violet's laugh turns into a yawn. My partner leans in and says her name. "You should get some sleep, baby. We will be there in the morning to say goodbye and give you kisses, okay?"
"Yeah," she replies around a yawn so big I think I hear her jaw crack. "Okay. Good night you two."
"Good night, baby."
My heart knits itself back together. "Good night, Bubbles."