Chapter 31
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
KILLIAN
Heather storms off toward the bedroom, and both of my brothers scoot their chairs out to go after her.
Holding my hand up, I stop them.
“I’ve got it.”
Rising from my seat, I go in search of her, wondering if I really do have this.
Last night was fucking perfect—but now everything is going to shit.
Again. Because of my choices. But was it really a choice?
I couldn’t leave her there. I check Carter’s room first, and am surprised I don’t find her there, so I go to Knox’s and she’s not there either.
Opening the door to my bedroom, I walk in and find her kneeling on the floor, looking like a beautiful, broken doll.
Her hair is a tangled mess, tears have stained her cheeks, old and new ones mixing together perfectly.
She lifts her head and stares at me with gut-wrenching pain in her eyes, causing a sharp twinge in my chest. Not a minute goes by without me knowing I have caused this girl so much anguish.
“Go away. I’m grieving.”
I kneel in front of her and take her hands in mine and rub her palms with my thumbs.
“What are you grieving, Killer?”
Her response is quick and as irritated as I expected.
“You, you fucking dick.”
“I’m not dead, baby. Save your tears for another day.”
“I hate you.” She says with the most adorable bite.
“Yeah? Do you always grieve for people you hate? Shouldn’t you be celebrating because you might finally get your wish?”
The gasp that comes from her lungs is loud and harsh.
“Is that what you think? I don’t wish that at all. I’m terrified. No matter what you think—I don’t want you to die—I don’t want to lose you. And if I do, I’ll lose them too.”
“My brothers?” I ask because it’s preposterous. There’s nothing she could do that would make them walk away from her. Nothing.
She nods in agreement.
“You die because of me. How does that turn out? Every time they look at me they think about how I cost them their brother. It probably won’t be quick. Instead, it’ll be long and painful until they finally reach their breaking point.”
I press my palm to her cheek and she leans into my touch like a kitten starved for attention.
“You’re over thinking this, baby. Knox and Carter could never walk away from you. They know this fight was my choice, and they would’ve done the same thing I did. I’m not fucking dead, and I have no intention of losing this fight. I will win this for you.”
“But-“ she attempts to argue with me, and I stop her because I’m not willing to think this will turn out any other way.
“Enough. I will win this because you are going to help me prepare for it.”
She laughs as if I’m joking, but I’m drop-dead serious.
When she spots my expression, she says, “Actually? How could I possibly help you prepare?”
Lifting her hand, I bring it to my lips and kiss her palm.
“First, you tell me everything you know about my opponent. How he fights, weapons I might expect, his strengths and weaknesses. Tell me everything you’ve seen with him.
Maybe things you’ve heard. I need to not be caught off guard.
Somehow, I have to anticipate his every move.
Most important is for you to stop acting like I’m going to die.
If I go in with a defeated attitude, I probably will. I need you to believe in me, baby.”
Heather climbs onto my lap and wraps her arms around my neck. Her blue eyes, now less sad, are fucking mesmerizing.
“I’m sorry. You’re right. I believe in you.
Win this fight, not for me, but all of us.
Knox and Carter might be mad at you, but they’ll work through it because they need you too.
Grave is hard for me to talk about. We have a lot of history, and he’s the reason I can’t ever have children.
But if it will help you, I will tell you everything because you have to win, Killian. Losing is not an option. I need you.”
I dig my fingers into her hair, pull her head back and kiss her in response. Those three fucking words are powerful. She parts her lips, letting me in, and I slide my tongue against hers as I cradle the back of her head. As we pull apart, I know why I’m going to win this fucking fight.
It’s her.
She’s the reason.
For everything.