14. First Things First
Chapter 14
First Things First
MEGAN
I f I watch another episode of a woman falling all over herself, embarrassing herself, to get a rose from a man with the hopes of screwing him in a hot tub I’m going to vomit.
It’s my own fault.
This is what happens when you quit your job, dump your fiancé, and basically blow up your entire life in one moment. You end up bored as hell on the sofa eating shit to keep the baby walrus growing inside of me happy.
That’s it.
I have to get out of this apartment.
I promised I’d give Lena 24 hours to find out what she could about Parker, but her search and find mission came up short. She didn’t say much but that she reached a dead end.
She’s a sweet girl who is trying to find her way in this new life that she’s found herself in with Hunter as her brother, but I’m done sitting passively as things happen around me.
Those days are over.
I will not be pushed around in my relationship just because he thinks he can, or that he should, or that he’s older than me and knows better. I have a voice and it’s time that I use it.
First things first.
I want to know the truth about Parker and make sure he’s not floating at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean somewhere.
Sure, the guy lost his way for a brief moment in time but he quickly course corrected himself. Truth be told, I don’t think he was ever going to turn me over to Mr. Fabre. I don’t think he has it in him.
I ease myself up from the couch and look out the window. It’s much easier to see what’s going on in my neighborhood when you’re on the seventh floor instead of the Penthouse suite. It doesn’t take a genius to realize that regardless of the status of my relationship with Hunter, he’s assigned a security detail outside the building. The black town car is a dead giveaway. But I don’t care. They can watch me. I’m headed straight to the club, anyway.
I’m not sure what I expected when I strolled in the Blue Whiskey. It hasn’t been that long since I quit. The world hasn’t imploded. Everything is as it always is. The only difference is that Gage is the one giving the orders instead of me. A small part of me wishes he wasn’t so good at my job, but that wouldn’t only be wishful thinking.
“Megan!” Gage greets me animatedly.
“Hi.”
“Have you come to put me out of my misery?” He jests.
“No, way.” I rub my stomach. “I have a bigger job on my hands.”
“That’s true.” He smiles. “Are you looking for Lena or Hunter because Hunter isn’t here right now?”
Perfect.
I don’t feel like dealing with him today.
“I was looking for Lena.”
She’s in the kitchen, seasoning some wings I think.
“Great, thanks.”
Lena isn’t pleased to see me when I walk into the kitchen area.
“What are you doing here?” she asks, worry etched on her forehead.
“Hey, roomie,” I greet her with sarcasm. “Nice to see you too.”
“We just saw each other a few hours ago when I left for work.”
“You know why I’m here.”
“Megan–”
“You have nothing to worry about. I won’t bring your name in it at all.”
“We live together. We’re friends. He’ll know.”
I’m not sure if the he she’s referring to is Hunter or Christian, but it doesn’t matter. The person I should have gone to straight from the beginning won’t divulge anything.
“I promise you. You’re safe.” I walk over and give her a brief hug. “I’ll see you later at home, okay?”
“Where are you going? I don’t think Hunter is even here right now.”
“I’m definitely not here to chat with him.”
Although secretly I miss the man like crazy, or at least the man he was when we first met.
“Are you sure you know what you’re doing, Megan?”
“I’m sure. I’m not here to make a scene just to get answers.”
“That sounds like the same thing to me.”
“It’s not,” I chuckle. “Trust me.”
I hate that Hunter’s secrets have created this uncomfortable wedge between Lena and me. I shouldn’t even be living in the same apartment with her. His apartment. But I have nowhere else to go and I’m not going to put our baby in harm’s way just to prove some sort of point. I don’t even think he’d let me go that far. Knowing that man, he’d lock me up in the same damn basement where Parker is before he allowed me to just disappear with his baby.
I head to the second floor and find Vaughn in Hunter’s office. His eyes light up when he sees me. No doubt thinking that I’ve come to patch things up with his bestie.
Not even close.
“Hey there, new mama.”
“Hey, Vaughn.”
“Were you looking for Hunt?”
“No, I was hoping to find Lars.”
“Lars?”
“Yeah, is he here?”
“Well, usually he’s with Hunter since…well since the driver position is vacant.”
“You said usually.”
“Hunt didn’t need him today.”
“So he’s alone?” I immediately worry about Hunter's safety. "Is he out on business?"
“Things have calmed down now that we have the Jonathan situation neutralized. He's okay on his own.”
“Then why do I have two guys in polyester suits and a town car tailing me around town?”
“That’s different, Megan.” He gives me a knowing look as if it was silly of me to even ask the question.
“Where can I find Lars?” I skip to the point.
“I’ll call him for you. Have a seat and make yourself comfortable. Can I get anything for you? Water? A snack?”
My spidey senses are tingling.
What is Vaughn hiding?
“No, I’m good.”
Vaughn gives Lars a call on his cell phone and five minutes later, he magically arrives.
“Megan?”
“Hi, Lars.” I smile cautiously.
“You wanted to see me?” He rolls down the sleeves of his Western-styled denim shirt and snaps the cuffs back in place.
Vaughn watches us both intently.
“Can we take a walk outside, maybe?” I ask Lars.
Lars looks at Vaughn for a quick moment, then back to me. “Sure, are you okay?”
“I’m fine. I just wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Okay, sure.”
Vaughn's eyes narrow as we leave the office. I know that he’s going to call Hunter as soon as I step over the threshold of the office, so I have to keep my interrogation of Lars brief and to the point. I start my inquisition as we walk down the club's steps to the main floor.
“First, I want to start by thanking you for all your help in trying to find me, Lars.”
“No thanks needed, Megan. It was my job, but it was also my pleasure that you were found safe.”
“Lars, I realize that you work for Hunter, but I’d also like to think that we’ve forged our own friendship amid what is just work for you.”
“It sounds like you want to ask me something, Megan.”
Lars is a no-nonsense sort of man. I’ve always appreciated that about him, so I get to the point.
“I know that whatever you feel about me, you feel ten times more of that for Parker. So I’m asking, do you know where he is?”
Lars pauses for a moment, no doubt deciding how much of the “truth” he’s going to tell me. We’ve walked through the kitchen and into the back alley of the club now, which is perfectly safe and private at this time of day.
“Yes, I know where he is.”
My chest tightens as I get closer to the truth.
“Is he being held against his will in this club?” I ask.
Lars’s face hardens. “Do you think I would ever tell you that, Megan?”
“I know that you’re not a liar.”
“No, I’m not, but I also don’t answer to you. You’re my boss’s girlfriend, not my boss.”
“Humph,” I scoff. “Your non-answer tells me everything I need to know,” I say with a steely glare."Parker trusted you."
“You don’t know anything,” he says thickly and I think I hear a hint of his Danish accent which he has managed to mask most of the time.
Suddenly the metal door to the kitchen swings open, and Hunter emerges dressed in a monochromatic tailored black suit, shirt, and tie. He got here quicker than I expected and damn he looks fucking delicious.
“Megan,” he greets me, staring me down with those deeply cold grey eyes and my thighs tremble.
“Hey,” is all I manage to say.
“Is there a reason why you’ve brought Lars out here in the alley to chat?”
Hunter looks between us both and it dawns on me that I may have just gotten Lars into some trouble.
“I made him come out here to ask him if he knows where Parker is?”
“Still looking for him, are you?” he retorts through gritted teeth.
“May I be excused?” Lars asks. “I need to finish up something.”
“Certainly, Lars,” Hunter replies. “I apologize for this.” He makes a hand gesture in my direction.
“Apologize for what?” I respond, offended by the insinuation that I’m making a scene.
Once Lars goes back inside the club, Hunter walks down the steps and strides toward me.
“I apologized for your behavior.”
“My behavior!”
Hunter runs his hand down the side of my face. I shudder at the feel of his textured fingertips across my skin.
Shit, I wasn’t expecting that.
“You’re so beautiful, Megan. I’ve never seen a more incandescent pregnant woman. You fucking glow.”
“Hunter–”
“It’s disappointed me how you’ve put the welfare of that traitor ahead of our life together.”
“That’s not what’s happening here.”
“What will you do when you find out what you came here for?”
“What do you mean?”
“What’s your next move? What are you going to do with the information?”
“It depends on what the information is.”
“Is that right?”
His fingertips trail down my face, the side of my neck, and leisurely skim the bones of my clavicle.
I won’t stop him though.
I’ve missed his touch and it feels too good. I forgot just how intense it can be between us.
He leans in and brushes his lips against mine then pulls back slowly.
“Against every one of my instincts, I treated Parker like a fucking king during his interrogation and then let him go to live his life. He’s alive and well and certainly not giving a shit about how you are. He’s moved on. Can you?”
“That wasn’t nice to say about him not giving a shit about me.”
“It’s the truth. Accept it.”
“I never said we were besties, I just didn’t want you to kill him. I don’t want you to have to carry such a burden like that on your soul.”
“I can deal with my own soul.”
“Can you?”
“The part you’re not getting is that would have been my business if I had ended his miserable life. It’s an ugly part of how things work in my world that I choose to keep away from you for good reason.”
“I don’t want you making all the choices.”
“In my business?”
“In my life!”
“Parker is not a fucking part of your life.”
“You made him a part of it when you sent him and Lars to my university to find me. The moment you sent them is the moment they also became a part of my life.”
"All I've wanted is your happiness," he exhales harshly. “When will you stop punishing me, Megan?”
“That’s not what I’m doing.”
“That’s what it feels like.”
His hand traces the curve of my right breast and I can feel my pussy aching. Everything seems so much more sensitive now that I’m pregnant.
“What are you doing?” I whisper through an exhalation.
“I’m reminding you that a man who would do anything for your sweet, stubborn ass is right here waiting for you to come home where you belong.”
One of his fingers rakes against my nipple instantly making it harden through the fabric of my shirt.
“Come home to me, Megan.”
It would be so easy to just say okay . To ignore all of our trust issues and fall into his arms. I’m carrying his child for God’s sake. It’s perfectly within my rights to change my mind and go live happily ever after with him.
I love Hunter.
And he loves me.
Particularly when things are on his terms. Hmm, for a brief moment, I forgot about that part.
“You’ll have to wait a little longer,” I say resolutely.
“Why?” His face scrunches into a scowl. “I told you what you wanted to know.”
“It’s not enough.”
His hand falls away from my body.
“Are you adamant about not coming home and having this baby alone?” he asks, his tone acidic.
“I’m just not ready to go back like things are normal when they’re not. When you’re afraid, Hunter, your default is to go into street fighter mode and street fighters suspect everyone and trust no one. I don't want to live like that.”
He straightens his tie and takes several steps back away from me as if I'm poison.
“I understand your point and will give you all the space you require.”
His sudden change in demeanor is startling. I don’t know what he’s thinking. Has he given up on me? Is this what I want?
“You will?”
“Yes, just take care of yourself and the baby. That’s all I ask.”
That sounds like a final wish.
“And if you need something, call Vaughn and let him know," he continues. "He’ll make whatever arrangements are necessary until I find myself a proper assistant.”
“Go through Vaughn?” I question softly.
“I don’t live in the gray zone, Megan. We’re either together or we’re not. You’ve decided that we’re not and I’m not in the habit of begging a woman for anything, so yeah, unless it’s an emergency go through Vaughn.”
“Fine.”
“Do you need a ride back home?”
“Am I dismissed?” I ask, put off by the way he’s kicking me out of the very club I managed for him a few short weeks ago.
He silently opens the metal door and waits for me to walk through it. I can hear the kitchen staff grow silent, waiting to hear what we’re going to say next. They've probably been eavesdropping the entire time, especially Lena.
But Hunter says nothing else, his face an unreadable blank slate.
And it’s in that instant the baby moves in my stomach for the very first time.
What have I done?