Chapter 10 Longevity
Eva
I took my first Zofran pill and stared around my office, praying it kicked right in and cured all my woes. My phone buzzed. It was Ellie, so I answered.
“Did you get the meds?”
“Yes. Finally!” I said. “No clue if they work. Pray for me. It’s all a terrible disaster.”
“I am sorry you are sick.”
“No, it’s worse than that. I have an open hole in my ceiling.
” I looked up at the 150-year-old pipes overhead.
“A pipe burst and doused me with water. Then, everything was see-through, so I changed into workout clothes. But that meant this skort and a tank top which right now looks better than ever. So, I put Mona’s old Cambridge hoodie over it, but it smelled like her, and I wanted to die. ”
“Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry. I promise it will all get better soon.”
“Oh, no, it got worse!”
“How?”
“The CEO showed up, assumed I was binging and purging because… you know, I’m the fatass. And I’d puked all over my hoodie. So, I tossed out my hoodie and fled to the pharmacy. Now, I regret tossing it but… what can I do? And he hates me.”
“The CEO?”
“Yes. He’s Daphne’s brother but all he’s done since I got here is complain about me. I think I’m about to be fired for ‘bad fit.’”
“That’s not legal.”
“Well, technically, it’s the U.S. So, everything is. But once he finds out I’m pregnant and not covered by FMLA, he will can my ass so fast.”
“He wouldn’t do that. You will figure it out,” Ellie said. “Are we still on for dinner later or are you not up to it?”
My heart sank. “I haven’t kept anything down all day, Ellie. I doubt I can do tacos.”
“Now, I know you’re sick,” Ellie said sweetly. “Why don’t I bring you a slushie and some fries and we can sit out on the back deck?”
“I’d get in the pool at this point,” I said. “If you don’t mind. You can bring Jane.”
“She’s at her dad’s.”
I watched Davey cross the open sitting area between the offices in a huff.
There was my baby daddy wandering around in the wild acting like an absolute ass.
The irony of all of this was he was about to fire the mother of his child all out of pride and rage.
I would be the one with no health insurance or income in a middling job market. No one would hire me.
“Well, come by. Mom and Dad are going to something at the church for my nephew. It’s going to be all quiet. I love you for it,” I said.
“Don’t worry about it. I’ve got you.”
Turning my attention back to our current misguided risk acceptance program, I fell back into my work. I ignored my corporate cheerleader getup, focusing instead on this. That was until Daphne stood in my doorway.
“So, they swapped out the pipe,” she looked at the offending hole. “But this looks like hell. They’re going to have to patch the plaster. I’m sorry.”
“Maybe I should just work from home for awhile?” I hoped like hell she’d say yes.
Daphne wobbled over and dropped onto the small couch on the side of the office. “Apologies. My feet are so fucking swollen.”
She put them up on the coffee table and let out a long breath.
“How did the appointment go?”
“I have GD. They wouldn’t even let me do another test. They just told me my numbers were too high, so now I have no clue what to eat. But Cal, being the absolute best husband on earth, has hired a chef to make me meals.”
“That’s really sweet,” I said.
Davey appeared. “Daphne, can I have a minute when you… have a minute?”
He looked at me, annoyed, then back at his sister.
“I’m just sitting down,” Daphne said. “Checking in on Eva. I’ll be with you in a bit.”
He nodded, then left.
“He’s in a nervous mood today!” Daphne giggled. “He passed me on the way in and said he thinks people have norovirus.”
Great.
“Oh, that sucks,” I said.
“Yeah, he gets a bee in his bonnet, and I have to calm him down.”
Excellent. So, I’m fucked? I sensed he was about to tell Daphne to cull me. Who could blame him?
“Are you okay?” Daphne asked. “You don’t look okay.”
“I think this isn’t right for me,” I said. “I think you all are going to fire me and it’s better if I just resign and—”
Daphne hoisted herself off the couch and walked to gently shut the door. She turned back, sitting across from me.
“Has Claire said something about not being happy with your work? Have I?”
“No, but—”
“Well, do you not like the job? Is there something I can fix?”
I teared, wanting to be honest.
“I’m sick. And I think it’s going to be an issue.”
She furrowed her brow in concern. “An issue? How sick? We don’t kick people when they’re down around here, Eva. Not if you ask me, anyway.”
“If I tell you something… will you keep a secret?” I asked.
“Of course. If it’s health information, the only one I can talk to about it is HR.”
Spoken like an attorney.
“Okay. So, I am pregnant and… it’s making me sick. Your brother just caught me puking and he’s like… livid.”
“Oh, because he thinks you came in sick with norovirus and he’s a supergermaphobe. Wait? You’re pregnant?”
I nodded.
“Oh, Eva, that’s so exciting! You’re doing this on your own?”
“It looks like it,” I answered.
“Well, I think that’s great.”
“It does not protect me with FMLA.”
“The City of Chicago guarantees labor protections for pregnant employees so, even if I wanted to fire you—which I don’t—I couldn’t, Eva.”
I shook my head. “You won’t want me. No one here—”
“Eva, who is bothering you? Is it Davey? Is he being an ass? God!”
She rose slowly and paced. I held my tongue, confused about where this would lead.
“He has such a bug up his ass about that fucking computer! I told him not to ask you to fix it but he’s still angry.”
Daphne turned her attention to me. “Let me fix this, okay? Don’t panic. Don’t quit. And take tomorrow off if you feel sick. I found that spending a day getting hydrated vastly improved my chances of staying well. Did they give you good drugs?”
“I just took my first Zofran.”
“Good. It will help. It gets better. If you need to take time for appointments or even just need to vent, let me know, okay?”
Davey
“Sit your ass down!” Daphne barged into my office as I watered plants on my windowsill.
“What?” I groaned. “Why are you so hormonal?”
“Sit down. Because I’m fucking angry.”
I sat with a thud. Daphne stood, hands on her hips, ready to explode and reminding me very much of Mum.
“I’m a woman who has just been told she isn’t able to consume the one type of food she craves—simple carbs—and my BISO is about to once again quit. And why? She thinks my brother is an asshole who hates her!”
Eva again?
“Daphne, I do not hate Eva. I find her difficult.”
“She is not your direct report. She says you yelled at her for being sick.”
“You shouldn’t come to work sick. I got her a replacement shirt, but really, she has broken dress code six ways from Sunday.”
“She lives in Indiana, Davey! She cannot exactly run home, grab some clothes and come back! She isn’t contagious.”
“I tried my best, okay?”
“Yeah, you say you did, but she’s an inch from leaving me. You don’t get it. She’s the one who can whip this program into shape. Claire scares people off. People love Eva. She’s got dry wit and is smart as hell. You, though, you are going to be the end of me, David Robert!”
I thought Daphne was being overdramatic about Eva wanting to quit, but now I realized she was serious. Had I really unnerved Eva that much? I thought she was contagious. I’d tried to help her! Why did she hate me so much?
“Calm down, Daph. I do not hate her. I’m sorry she feels that way. I can apologize—”
“You will do no such thing, David. I will smooth this over. Every time you are alone with her, things go wrong, and you end up on her bad side.”
“I’m your boss. You’re her boss.”
“But this is not the way I work. I am not hierarchical and if you want me to run the business the best way possible and bring you good earnings reports—”
“I know, I know. You make me look good. You make it easy,” I agreed. “Daphne, no one is faulting you, but maybe she’s not a good fit. If she wants to leave—”
“She’s not leaving. And you will stay away.”
I held my hands up, signaling I gave in. “Are we good?”
“Stay off my porch and I won’t come back in here with Mum. Got it?”
“Got it loud and clear, Daph.”
She waddled out, still angry. Daphne was intense when not gestating a human, but when pregnant she was ten times worse.
I watched her cross back to Eva’s office.
They talked for a bit, before she returned to her own domain.
Eva crossed into the conference room, holding it together somehow.
I couldn’t help but smile rather than scowl.
She was so cute in that polo. It was a ridiculous outfit, but she pulled it off.
I told Daphne I’d stay out of it, but there was no way I could. We’d gotten off on the wrong foot, but I’d win Eva back somehow.