Chapter 19 #2
He gives me a doubtful look. “I guess we will find out, won’t we?” I expect him to reach out and pull me into a dance, and the thought has my heart pounding, has me preparing to feel his hands on my body.
But he doesn’t move, doesn’t try to close the distance between us.
Good .
“For now, you will start by just learning the steps to the average waltz,” he says. “Mostly because I don’t want you stomping on my toes.”
With his hands still in his pockets, Kai steps in and out, side to side, showing me the basics. He’s so graceful, so elegant, so natural .
Fighting. Fighting is also a dance to him.
I feel stiff and suddenly so unsure of myself. Even with his hands still in his pockets, Kai easily steps in time with me, though he doesn’t dare get close enough to be trampled by my clumsy footing.
I sigh, irritated with myself and the smirking prince in front of me.
“Relax,” Kai murmurs from across me with more than a hint of humor in his voice. “You’re thinking too much. Don’t calculate, just move with the music.” I look up to see him already staring at me with a grin. “Also, you do know this is a dance, correct? So, no fighting stance is necessary.”
Only then do I notice how tight and poised my body is, hands slightly raised as though readying to strike. I straighten and run a hand through the strands of hair falling out of my loose braid. I’m oddly... nervous . And it’s maddeningly annoying.
This would be a lot easier if he weren’t staring at me.
Another waltz ends, replaced by a slow, mellow tune. My head is lowered, pieces of hair falling into my face as I watch my feet step in time with the music.
A pressure at my waist makes me jump.
Like a reflex, my hand twitches towards the knife now sheathed under the folds of my dress, but a calloused hand catches my wrist. “Knives are also not necessary for dancing,” Kai says with a low laugh.
Holding my gaze, his rough fingers slide slowly from my wrist to my palm before he folds his hand into mine, raising it into the air.
But it’s his other hand that holds my attention, the one that has settled comfortably against the small of my back. The one that is pulling me towards him. Through the thin fabric of the dress I threw on for dinner, I can feel the warmth of his palm seeping into my lower back.
I stare at him as he pulls me close. It’s not as if I didn’t know this was bound to happen, I just wasn’t expecting it so suddenly.
He looks at me with an expectant expression before chuckling softly and sliding his hand from my back, making me feel suddenly cold in its absence.
He grabs my other hand and lifts it to his shoulder, dropping my palm atop his thin shirt.
I can feel every muscle shift beneath it as he returns his hand to my back, firmly flattening it against my dress.
“Let’s see what you learned,” he says softly as his feet begin moving in time with the music. I fumble to follow, managing to mirror my steps with his. He leads easily, confidently guiding me through the dance.
My eyes sweep across the room and down at my feet, counting with each step.
The pressure on my back is suddenly gone when fingers catch my chin, tipping my head up.
“You’ll never learn if you keep watching your feet, Gray.
Eyes on me.” He smiles, returning his hand to my back. “That shouldn’t be too difficult.”
I roll my eyes at him, opening my mouth to make a remark only to ask a question instead. “How did you know Kitt asked me to the ball?”
Kai’s laugh is humorless, hollow. “I’m no Psychic, but it wasn’t hard to put the pieces together.” When I only stare at him, he sighs and continues. “I know my brother, and because of that, I knew he would ask you.”
“That was a terrible answer,” I say simply.
“And you’re still a terrible dancer, so my work is far from finished.”
I snort.
“Oh,” Kai adds casually, “he may have also mentioned that he asked you.”
Another laugh escapes me before I can stop it, and I press my lips together to smother the sound. My eyes fall to his chest that is far too close, reminding me that we are far too close for competitors, for enemies in these Trials.
And yet, here I am, dancing with him in his bedroom. Alone. In the dark.
If it’s even possible, I’m suddenly more rigid than I was before.
Kai feels me stiffen in his hold and leans impossibly closer. “You’re as stiff as a board, Gray. Loosen up.”
Not. Helping.
I try and fail to melt into his embrace like a dance partner should. I’m hopeless. Hopelessly in over my head.
But the prince doesn’t give up so easily. No, he wraps his arm fully around my waist and tugs me to him. I drag my feet, not wanting to close the little distance left between us.
A maddening dimple peeks out at me, barely visible in the dim light.
“So, what have we learned today?” he asks, annoyingly amused as ever.
“One, daggers are not needed for dancing, and two, you actually have to be close to your partner during the dance. And shockingly, you seem to be struggling more with the latter.”
“Would you rather I struggle with the first and put a dagger to your throat?” I pause. “Again.”
“So very predictable.” he chuckles, the sound washing over me before he mutters, “Always so vicious and eager to stab me.”
He is very close to me. Too close to me.
And it’s because I’m so distracted by that fact that my foot lands on top of his, and I stumble forward to collide with his solid frame.
Both of his hands wrap around my waist, steadying me before I regain my senses and push away from him.
A deep laugh rumbles from his chest, paired with a genuine smile, one that I’ve only ever seen him wear around his brother.
Lethal .
“How can a fighter have such poor footwork?” His eyes dance between mine. “You are just full of surprises.”
“Well, surprise , I’m done with this lesson,” I say flatly, turning out of his grasp. My back is to him when he snatches my wrist and whips me around, pulling me back.
“But you still owe me one more dance.” His wavy hair tumbles over his brow, the look in his eyes practically begging me to play with him.
“Fine,” I say, playing along. “Another dance for the answer to a question.”
His eyebrows raise. “Is that a bribe, Gray?”
“Those are my terms. Take it or leave it, prince.” His only response is a low chuckle. He turns his head away from me, thinking before he finally meets my gaze.
Slowly, he raises my hand back into the air and rests his other hand comfortably onto the small of my back once again. “Deal.”
Another slow waltz begins, occupying me with the music and steps, drowning me in the dance. When I can’t seem to ignore the feel of his eyes watching me so intently, I finally meet his gaze.
“Alright, what is it you’re dying to know?” Kai asks, leading me through the dance.
I have no idea.
He looks at me, through me, waiting for an answer. His gray eyes are like chips of ice, shards of glass. Like both, his gaze is pointed and piercing. Cold yet captivating. Beautiful in the way only deadly things can be.
And just like that, I suddenly can’t think of a single thing I want to ask him. I rack my brain for a question only to blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.
“Do you wish it was you?” He blinks, dark lashes fluttering. “Do you wish you were the future king of Ilya? The heir?”
It’s not at all the question I thought I would be asking, but here we are.
“No,” he says simply, holding my gaze.
I raise my brows in a silent question. When he doesn’t continue, I say, “That’s it? ‘No’?”
“You got your answer, and I got my dance. That was the deal, darling.”
* * *
I can barely breathe.
Adena’s thin arms are wrapped so tightly around my neck that I’m beginning to see spots. She screamed and squealed when she spotted me waiting by the Fort.
My best friend. My literal partner in crime. Safe and sound. Beautiful and bubbly as ever.
Lenny arrived at my room early this morning, ready to take me into Loot and retrieve my new seamstress. Apparently, he had gotten approval to do so, though I was too excited to bother asking for details. I may have even squealed myself.
“I’m going to be your what ?!” Adena squeaks.
I sigh, though it comes out sounding more like a laugh. “My personal seamstress.” I’ve filled her in on the details about three times now. “I mean, unless you don’t want the job...”
“Are you crazy?! Of course I want the job, Pae!” She’s practically skipping as we make our way to the coach waiting at the far end of Loot.
I survey the market and wide alley before me. My home looks just as dull and dreary as it did when I left it. I let the sound of curses and haggling, the scent of fish and spices wash over me. All familiar. All the same.
Lenny opens the door of the coach and both Adena and I settle in before we are rumbling up the uneven cobblestone street, heading for the palace.
“I can’t believe this is happening,” Adena says, in awe as she looks out the tiny window. She turns back to me, taking in the casual dress Ellie forced me into with wide eyes. “I can’t believe this .” She looks from my face to the dress before snatching up the hem of the skirt and inspecting it.
“Don’t get used to... this .” I gesture to the dress. “I typically wear pants during the day, but Ellie insisted I wear a dress to make a good impression on the people who saw me at Loot.”
And there certainly were a lot of people. Despite how early it was, the marketplace was teeming with men, women, and children, all gawking at me as I passed.
I’m not sure what impression I made on them, but I certainly made one, nonetheless.
“It sounds like Ellie and I will get along perfectly,” Adena says, her smile bright.
“Oh, I’m sure you will.” I laugh before continuing, “And you will be paid, fed, and have a real bed to sleep in at night. I’m told there is a sewing room where you will spend most of your time, filled with every type of fabric you could ever dream of.”
Adena’s eyes go glossy at the thought. “Heaven. I’ll be in heaven.”
I fill her in on everything—the training, the interviews, the contestants. She does the same, telling me of her time in Loot while I’ve been gone.
“I was beginning to think you forgot about me!” Adena says with a laugh, dismissing the idea. “And now, here you are, taking me back with you!”
A wave of guilt slams into me, threatening to drown.
I swallow before opening my mouth to plead for forgiveness, to tell her I’m sorry, to—
“I could never forget about you, A.”
Never again.
She beams while my heart beats wildly against my chest. She’s so very good, and I am so very guilty. I’m weak for withholding the truth from her, but with each beat of my heart, I vow to never do it again.
“Oh, wait! Who are you going to the ball with?” Adena’s high-pitched question cuts through my confused thoughts.
Of course Adena would know that detail of the Trials, how we all have to pair up for the balls. She loves this sort of stuff. I run a hand through my hair, combing it out of my face. “Well...I’m going with Kitt.”
Adena blinks. And then she shrieks.
“Kitt? You mean, the heir ?” She’s practically hyperventilating, fanning herself with her hands.
“It’s not a big deal, A. Except that I do need to look good,” I say, trying to calm her down.
“Well then you came to the right girl,” she says confidently. “Wow, okay, you have to look really good then.” She swipes at the curly bangs falling into her eyes. “Well, there are several beautiful shades of green we could choose from. We could put you in an emerald, or a sage—”
I hold a hand up, a smile curving my lips. “Actually, I have a different color in mind.”