Chapter Two #3
I don’t know if he’s playing with me or just boldly riding the post-fight excitement. Either way, I need to get out of here before I do something stupid. Something I can’t take back.
“Should I be disturbed by your close knowledge of my body’s reactions?”
“I know every nook and cranny of your mind, just like you do mine.” His light giggle makes my balls tingle. And it only gets worse when his hand falls on my chest, cold and soft.
He doesn’t know me that well, because if he did, he’d also know how much I want to rip those flimsy panties off him and fuck him against the window for the whole world to see.
So what kind of game is he playing now? Acting all…flirty?
“I have no time nor patience for your capricious desires.”
His body turns rigid before he echoes my words. “Capricious. Desires?”
“Like when you befriended those identical twins in high school by beating their ex to see if their kisses tasted the same? Or when you bought an entire store to impress that girl in my class in uni, only to dump her after the deal was done,” I remind him of some of his past absurdities, hiding the bitterness in my voice.
He pushes his head back to look at my face, but I keep my eyes firmly on the yellow wall in front of me.
“Twins?” he repeats. “Oh, the ones who wanted to get back at that guy, whatever-his-name-was. You remember it wrong. He had his fun with both of them without the other one knowing. They asked me to teach him a lesson, and I did it in exchange for matcha chocolate. I don’t know who spread that rumor, possibly that same guy. ”
That could be true. Being the heir of a mafia boss, he was feared in school. People either stayed away or asked for shady favors. Nevertheless, he did some crazy shit.
“I don’t remember any girl in uni, bunny.”
“You are lying. You know exactly what girl I’m talking about.
” She was in a couple of classes with me back in the first year of uni, and we became friends-ish.
Until Aki saw her. They had a fling, he treated her like shit, and she never talked to me again.
Not that I cared about her, but I remember that time well since that was the day I realized nothing would ever happen between me and Aki.
He was straight, and on top of that, he saw me like a brother.
“It was ages ago. How can you still be upset about that drooling skank!” His short temper abruptly gets the better of him. He has zero interest in hiding how he feels. I knew he remembered her, how could he not? I didn’t talk to him for a month after that.
Aki suddenly climbs on top of me, face to face. His mouth comes down, and his teeth sink into my scarred cheek and jaw. Hard.
I growl, grabbing his hair to pull his head back. “What the fuck!”
“You need to be punished!” His hands are holding my face still, looking at me with a glower.
I push my palm on his forehead as I see him coming at me with those teeth again. “Enough with the biting!”
He covers my hand, gripping at the back of his hair, and digs his nails in the skin until I release him. Then moves to the other hand still on his forehead, grabs my thumb, and pulls. Fuck! He’s the devil incarnate!
We start wrestling; I pull both his arms behind his back, arching his torso.
His dark nipples are hard. He takes advantage of my brief distraction, and twisting his body, he lifts his knee and presses it hard against my stomach.
I let his arms go while I flip us and shove him face up on the sofa, caging him, propping my body on my elbows and knees.
He wraps his legs and arms around my waist and roughly yanks on my ponytail, pulling my head back and digging those sharp teeth into my neck.
Then he proceeds to push all his weight on one side, making me lose balance and knocking both of us off the sofa and down on the floor.
I wrap myself around him, hoping to take the brunt of the fall, which is mitigated by the rug and some cushions. Still the air is sucked out of my lungs as my back hits the ground, and a half second later, gravity drops Aki on top of my chest.
“Pffft!” He snorts and laughs against my pec as I grunt all my pain.
My wound is on fucking fire, but all I care about is the feel of his lean body on top of mine, his strong legs on both sides of my hips, his face pressed to my chest. Aki pushes himself up on his hands just far enough for my eyes to see his clearly—two pools of velvety dark chocolate with hints of caramel around the pupils framed by incredibly long eyelashes. So fucking breathtaking.
“How many times do I have to teach you about balance?” He sounds out of breath.
“You play dirty,” I manage to say, but the reality is that I can never win against him. Not because he’s stronger, but because he’s my number one weakness.
He wiggles his body until he’s sitting right on my cock. Bare-chested, all smooth skin and toned muscles, wearing that sexy lingerie that doesn’t hide his stiffening cock. Fuck. Me.
“Oh, I think you like dirty.” He sits up and starts grinding against my dick like a skilled stripper. I can feel his soft, juicy ass cheeks cradling my length through my pants, stroking my raging hard-on up and down. His fingers are brushing my tattoos, and the scars underneath.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I hiss, grabbing his hips to stop him from moving. If he doesn’t quit this shit, I’ll come in my boxer briefs.
“I believe that blowing off steam after an adrenaline rush is very important. Like destroying stuff, hitting a bag, fucking.”
What did he just say? The curiosity I see in his eyes throws me off for a moment. He takes my left hand and pushes my ring finger inside his mouth biting hard on the base.
“Goddamit, Akira! What are you doing?” To me! My grip on his hip tightens. He sucks on my finger like a damn lollipop, making my dick weep precum.
I can barely keep my hands away from him, and now he does this? He crosses lines without hesitation, without thought or reason, drawing me into a new game with no clear rules.
I welcome the uncontainable pleasure and the suffocating feeling of uncertainty because it’s from him.
How many times have I imagined this? Having Aki filled with uncontrollable desire for me.
On his knees, against a wall, from behind, lying on a bed, and more, trembling, begging, screaming, even biting.
Dreams I felt embarrassed about. Guilty, even pathetic.
His brown eyes turn impish. “What do you think I’m doing?” he asks while licking the tip of my finger, waking up my hunger.
How am I supposed to resist this? And what is this? He’s always been very tactile with me, but never at this level. What’s gotten into him?
“Did you throw all of your shame out the window?” I hear the sound of my voice, too hoarse, too weak, just before my phone starts ringing. It’s Kumicho’s ringtone. It’s like a bucket of cold water over my libido.
“Get off me before I make you.” I look straight into his eyes to show him I mean it. He doesn’t seem to care as he pulls my hand near his mouth and bites my wrist.
I growl. I hadn’t thought the nickname Mad Dog would suit him this perfectly. Biting me seems to be a pastime for him.
“You sure you want me to?” He rides my eager dick once more, like an expert cowboy would, with that plump ass of his.
What I want isn’t what’s important. Even though I’m filled with lust, I can’t let my greed rise.
I look at the smug smirk on his face, and I know this is just an impetuous decision for him, an ill-considered action, a momentary itch.
While for me, indulging my own desires would only lead to chaos and self-destruction.
I grab his waist and unceremoniously throw him on the sofa—actually enjoying his oomph. I immediately call Kumicho back.
“Why the fuck didn’t you answer before, gaijin?” The big boss always goes straight to the point—Aki got that same brazen attitude from her.
“My apologies, Kumicho. We encountered some obstacles tonight.”
“Fuck,” she mutters, adding some cussing in Japanese too. Understanding the language is expected if you want to be part of the family, and foreigners are still not welcome. I’m the only exception.
I hear her taking a long puff of smoke and then releasing it. “Obstacles my nephew removed.”
“Hi. He did, Kumicho.”
Another fuck uttered. Another puff blown. “I’ll see you both tomorrow morning. I want to hear directly from him what happened.” She ends the call without waiting for my reply. She doesn’t need one. Whatever the big boss orders is done.
“What does she want?” Aki asks with a slightly annoyed tone, heading toward the kitchen. This time I don’t look at his ass, but I can clearly see those juicy cheeks jiggling with every step in my memory.
“To see us tomorrow.” I grab the clean Henley I left on the chair before and put it on. The waistcoat I was wearing when I got stabbed could be fixed, maybe the coat as well. I don both of them. The blood is not visible on the dark fabric.
“She wants to know what happened at the restaurant.”
“Doesn’t she have Masa to do it?” He sniffs with irritation.
Masa is an extra man Kumicho added to our crew when we moved to New York. His real job is to keep an eye on us. Aki is very irked by it, but as usual he will try to find a silver lining, like using Masa as a puppet or turning him into a punchball.
“He wasn’t there since you gave him the wrong place,” I remind him.
“He’s a fucking snitch! A glorified babysitter! I’m not a damn kid who needs supervision.”
I’d like to remind him how, at times, he actually needs some supervision, but I don’t want to risk another wrestling encounter. My dick is still throbbing inside my boxer briefs.
“I’m going,” I let him know, as he sets two tubs of ice cream on the counter.
“Sleep here.”
“I can’t sleep with you,” I declare.
“Thought rain would have put you in a better mood,” he mutters.
He knows my fixation with it. A pluviophile is what he thinks I am.
But the real reason behind liking the rain is because it kept my father away from home when I was a kid, leaving me and my brother free from his abuse for a few extra hours.
“There’s a perfectly comfortable guest bedroom upstairs.” He points his index up at the second floor.
“You always sleepwalk your way to me during the night and lie half on top of me, snoring,” I grumble, but the truth is that it’s dangerous.
Sleeping under the same roof. I almost gave in to my desires last time, dreaming of Aki kissing me, then waking up with him squeezing the shit out of me like a python in mating season.
His sleep-disheveled hair, that foggy gaze as he tries to wake up, the way he stretches, arching all the way back, even how he scratches his ass getting out of bed. He always drinks his OJ before breakfast, and next takes a long, never-ending shower.
With the passage of time, he remains a constant in the storm of changes. Like the way he clings to me when I sleep or how he hides nothing, not even his insanity, how he turns into a brat when he doesn’t have what he wants, or the way his glare is begging me to stay.
But I can’t. Not this time. I feel too raw tonight.
“I don’t snore. I just get cold at night,” he retorts, the usual excuse for his sleep-or-not-walking. “Ice cream?” He removes the lids, and then starts eating directly from the tubs with a spoon.
“If you have mint chocolate,” I say, knowing already what he’s going to say.
He smacks his lips. “Only if it walked in this apartment by itself. Any flavor other than matcha is nonsense, you know that.”
He’s right, I knew that, it’s just hard to…leave him.
“Stop fucking with me and stay,” he insists, sounding indifferent as he walks to the sofa with a tub in each hand. And that’s exactly the problem. Because I want that indifference to turn to need.
“Pass.” I see the surprise on his face. I always stay when he asks me to. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow morning.” I slip my boots on, and as I open the front door, I feel the need to lighten the blow by saying, “Don’t let the ice cream freeze your brain.”
I hear him mutter something, but I don’t stop.
I untie my hair on the way to the elevator, get in, and then out of the building.
I stop just outside to tap a cigarette out of the pack and light it.
Menthol fills my lungs as thoughts about Aki keep firing inside my head.
Wanting to put a stop to them, I let my eyes search around.
It’s still raining, and it’s late; there are no people on the sidewalks. Is Joel looking as it drizzles down as well? I could bump into him on the street since we are both in New York. Would he even recognize me when it looks like I borrowed half of my face from Freddy Krueger?
I grip the cigarette between my front teeth and tilt it up, letting the smoke float up toward the transparent awning.
There are people who share the same space, yet they don’t really mix with one another. Is that my and Joel’s destiny? The food inside my stomach churns.
I decide not to wait for Soma, so I chuck the cigarette on the ground and pull up the collar of my coat before heading toward my place. Could the rain wash all my frustrations away? The wet drops distract me, cooling my head, invading my clothes, finding a way to my skin, rolling down my body.
With every step I take my head goes from Joel to Aki and what happened at his place a few minutes before.
In all the years we’ve spent together, he’s never gone that far over the line with me.
A few times, it looked like he got close, but it was mostly all me, looking for hidden meanings that weren’t there.
Some things grow when they’re shared, some things are halved.
I now know what that saying means. My feelings toward him have multiplied, and as they did, I’ve given parts of myself to him, time after time. Until…I discovered half of myself missing.
That obstinate, foolish half that resides within him.