Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
Palmer was curled under her blanket, nice and warm. The blanket Beau had given her was tucked under her chin. Her favorite pacifier was tucked into her mouth. A storybook rested open in Beau’s hands as he sat on the edge of the bed reading to Palmer.
He cleared his throat dramatically.
Palmer smiled a little. “You’re silly.”
“It’s important to prepare the audience,” Beau replied. “This is serious storytelling.”
She pulled the blanket up higher, settling in.
Beau opened the soft, blue-colored book and started reading.
When Palmer had seen the brightly colored book, she’d immediately been enamored by a story that talked about non-traditional families. Beau flipped through the pages of the picture book, keeping his voice calm and steady as he read to her.
When he finished, he closed the book and pressed a kiss to Palmer’s head.
“It’s kinda like us, Daddy.”
He smiled. “It is. We built our family.”
“We sure did. I think we did a great job.”
“Me too, pretty baby.”
“Daddy?” Palmer asked, sitting up and shrugging off the covers. Her heart pounded in her chest, but what she had to say was so super important.
“Yes, baby?”
“I love you.”
Time froze and for a moment Beau didn’t move at all.
Palmer looked at him, her eyes wide with fear and her hair messy from snuggling under the covers. “You don’t have to say it back. I know it’s a really big deal. I just… I haven’t felt love like this before—safe and soft and I don’t want to go another day without telling you that I love you.”
“Oh, pretty baby,” he said, pulling her from the covers. “Thank you for telling me your feelings. I love you too, little girl.”
“You do?” That seemed hard to believe. Daddy was loveable, but Palmer felt like she still had a lot of work to do. She was still kinda messy on the inside.
“I do. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me, pretty baby.”
Palmer smiled and lay back down. “Yay.”
“Yay.” Daddy chuckled, stroking her hair.
“I… I don’t feel like I’m loveable yet. It still feels like I have to do a lot of work inside of my brain and heart to be loveable, but you’ve never lied to me before, Daddy, so I trust you.”
“The wonderful thing about love is that it doesn’t have to be earned. You don’t have to be perfect to receive it. It doesn’t wait for you to get everything right or become someone better first. Love just accepts you, messy or not.”
Palmer reached out, grabbing his shirt and pulling him close. She pressed a kiss to his lips—it was much like their first one, soft and safe.
“Thank you for loving me, Daddy.”
“You are the best thing in my life, little one.”
Palmer knew there was one more thing she had to do before she could go to bed.
“Fuck.”
Beau’s eyebrow raised. “Excuse me, pretty baby?”
Palmer’s tummy flipped, but not in a happy way.
“Fuck,” she said again, less confident this time.
“Palmer,” Beau started, but before he could even finish, Palmer burst into tears.
She didn’t want to be bad, but she had to know if Daddy would stick to his word and punish her. “I’m sorry!”
Beau looked sympathetic as he wiped her tears away. “It’s hard to believe good things can be real, huh?”
She nodded and sniffled pitifully.
“That’s okay, pretty baby. You can check as often as you need to, but I promise I’ll always keep my word.”
Palmer gulped and her bottom tingled in anticipation.
Beau stood and held out his hand. “Mouths that say dirty words get washed out, little one.”
Palmer placed her hand in his and allowed him to pull her from the bed. He plucked her pacifier that was attached to her soft puppy from the bedside table.
“No, Daddy!” she cried. “Puppy didn’t say a bad word, Palmer did!” She hoped he would use the other pacifier- the one attached to the pretty clip.
“Unfortunately sometimes our naughty actions affect other people, little one. Puppy is going to have to learn a hard lesson with you.”
Palmer cried as Beau led her into the bathroom. He set her on the sink with a hand on her knee before kneeling and pulling out a bottle of pink soap.
Using pink soap to wash out her mouth was diabolical. Pink was her favorite color.
“This soap is safe to be swallowed. It will taste very yucky, but it won’t make your tummy sick,” he said as if reading her mind.
He applied far too much of the naughty soap to her pacifier before holding it to her mouth. “You have to keep this in your mouth for four minutes, pretty baby. You need to suck it even though it’s nasty.”
Wanting to be obedient, Palmer parted her lips and he placed the soapy soother in her mouth. The taste automatically made her gag.
“Daddy loves you enough to follow through. I will each and every time.”
Palmer nodded, tears rolling down her face. Even while Beau was punishing her, he was calm and collected. He stroked her face and patted her knee.
She sucked the soother, swallowed the soap, and cried throughout the four minutes. She swallowed so much soap she was worried she was going to poot bubbles.
When the four minutes was up, Beau took the pacifier out of her mouth and helped her rinse and spit before washing off the bulb.
Once he was done and she was in his arms again, she threw her arms around his neck and held him tight. “Thank you, Daddy.”
“I will always give you what you need, baby. Even if it’s a punishment.”
“Does my Daddy know you’re taking me to the petting zoo?
” Palmer asked a few days later as she and Auntie Catherine walked toward the area.
Palmer didn’t think he did because surely he wouldn’t subject her to more goose poop.
She shivered. She was still having nightmares about the last visit she’d had.
Plus she looked absolutely adorable in a new blue sundress and pink striped socks.
She didn’t match, not even a little bit, but Daddy was helping her learn to break some rules and a blue dress with pink striped socks defiantly broke the rules.
“He does.”
Palmer frowned. “My Daddy, Beau Williams, knows you’ve taken me to the place where nightmares are born on May 28th, a day when I’m already feeling emotionally raw?”
Uncle Sam and Auntie Catherine chuckled. “Someone has on their sassy pants this morning.”
“If I did have sassy pants on, they’d be covered in poop by the time we left,” Palmer grumbled.
“There is your Daddy, Beau Williams, right there,” Auntie Catherine teased, squeezing Palmer’s hand before releasing it.
“Daddy,” Palmer cried. She ran to him and like always he scooped her up. “Did you come to take me away from this horrid place?” She threw her hand over her forehead.
Beau laughed before trying to set her on her feet.
“No, thank you, " she said, seriously, holding her feet in the air.
Laughing, her Daddy motioned for someone to come nearer. Reese walked closer holding the prettiest pink pair of plastic boots Palmer had ever seen.
“I thought you might like these,” Beau said.
“They’re beautiful!” Palmer let him set her on her feet. He helped her slip off her sneakers and slide her feet into the sparkly boots.
“They’re so pretty!” Pippi squealed. “You gotta see if they’re fast.”
“Oh! Good idea!” Palmer tried to run, but Beau snagged her by the back of her dress.
“Umph,” she grunted.
Laughing, he picked her up. “Wait just a second, speedy feet, I have a surprise for you.”
Palmer placed her hands on her cheeks. “For me?”
“For you, pretty baby.” He carried her through the gates and toward the back of the zoo.
“Daddy, I love you so manies, but if your surprise is Ryan Gosling, I might cry.”
“I promise to protect you from naughty goosies today.”
“Just today?”
“And forever.” He set her on her feet and led her around the barn instead of through it and when he paused, Palmer looked around.
“I don’t see a surprise, Daddy. Are you sure some animal didn’t carry it away or something?”
Beau chuckled. “Pretty sure.” He smiled and pulled an envelope from his jacket pocket. “This came for you.”
“For me? Who even knows I’m here?” Palmer asked suspiciously.
“I promise you, it’s not common knowledge,” Beau assured her.
Palmer took the envelope and scanned the front, her frown gradually turning into a smile as she recognized a familiar name. “It’s from Ms. Hammond!”
Her Daddy smiled and nodded. “I told you it was safe.”
Palmer carefully slid her nail under the flap of the envelope and pulled out a card. The front was embossed with flowers surrounding the silhouette of a young woman standing on top of a hill. “It’s so pretty,” Palmer said, gently running her fingertips over the flowers.
“It is,” her Daddy agreed.
Opening the card, Palmer read the message and then looked up at him, her mouth forming a small ‘O’. “Daddy… how… I mean… when… why…”
“Breathe, pretty baby, just breathe,” her Daddy said, dropping his palms to cup her cheeks.
She mimicked him as he inhaled and then exhaled slowly a few times.
Once she felt a bit less lightheaded, she tried again.
“She says she was gifted not only the laundromat, but the entire strip center. She owns it all now and that she has the money to send her children to college so they can have better lives. She said that she’d heard I was happy and safe and that we both must have fairy godfathers looking after us.
” She looked up at him, her eyes welling. “Oh, Daddy, you—”
“Me? Why would you think that?” Beau asked, waving his hand in the air. “Maybe it’s just that magic exists beyond the Ranch’s fences. What do you think?”
Palmer wiped tears off her cheeks with one hand while hugging the note to her chest with the other. “I think I’ve got the bestest Daddy in the whole wide world.”
“Ahh, pretty baby, that means the world to me.” Beau bent to kiss her softly before straightening and reaching into his pocket again. This time he pulled out a scroll tied with a pink satin ribbon. “This is for you.”
“No, Daddy! I don’t ever need another gift!”
“Daddy gets to decide what you need. Of course, if you’d rather have a spanking—”