Chapter 21 - Shane #2
“Really?” she asks. “Neither of them has any family?”
“No,” I answer. “Well, Trina had an aunt who left town, but Sadie believes she somehow got left out of the curse because she was a twin. The girls also don’t think the woman lived long afterwards—the magical feedback of the curse causes isolation, insanity, and death to anyone within the bloodline. ”
“So the curse could come for me, too?” Hyacinth asks, shocked.
“It already has,” I reply, in a gentle voice. “And we’re going to get through it—together.”
Hyacinth smiles, snuggling in a little closer to me.
“You make me feel safe,” she whispers.
“I’m glad,” I reply. “All I want is to protect you.”
Sorrow flickers deep in her violet gaze, and she turns her face away as the bad memories from her past rise in her mind again.
“Dan said that,” she whispers, very softly. “And I was so desperate to be taken care of. It felt like I finally had someone who cared about me.”
“I’m so, so sorry,” I say, meaning it with every fiber of my being. “I don’t want to cage you—and I’ll never hurt you, I swear it, Hyacinth.”
“I know,” she replies, her eyes softening as she reaches up to stroke my cheek. “It’s just that the intensity between us scares me a little.”
“It scares me, too,” I admit. She shakes her head a little.
“The thing is, I thought the intensity was love. I thought that not being able to resist him was a sign that we were meant to be. I was so excited when he touched me, I let him do all sorts of things to me.”
Hyacinth chokes up, looking away as a tear falls down her cheek, and I’m lost for words as ugly images storm through my head.
“I begged him to do those things to me. And I always came, so I liked it, right? I always went back for more. So I must have loved it.”
“Oh, my poor sweet girl,” I whisper, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her towards me. We curl up together, and I stroke her hair gently, desperate to heal the hurt in her soul.
“Maybe I’m fucked up for life now,” she says. “Maybe it’s got to be pain, entrapment, fear, or I can’t be satisfied.”
“But with me,” I ask urgently. “With me, were you scared or hurt?”
“No,” she says, shaking her head. “But you kidnapped me, Shane. It’s essentially the same. How can I trust myself?”
“Oh my God,” I whisper. “I’m so, so sorry. I mean—I was sorry before. I knew what I did was wrong, but I can’t believe I’ve done this to you.”
“I’d like to say it’s okay,” she answers. “But clearly, it isn’t.”
“I don’t even know if it’s up to us,” I mutter. “We’re all just dolls in the game of some ancient witch. I take full responsibility for what I did to you, but I didn’t create these circumstances. We’re both trapped in this.”
She nods slowly, hugging me even more tightly. “I want to say sorry, too,” she says.
“Why?” I ask, surprised.
“I didn’t really understand how hard the situation is for you. You’ve lost people you love, Shane, and I didn’t have any empathy for your grief.”
Pain slices through my heart, making me turn my face away from her, but she wraps her arms even more tightly around me and won’t let me go.
“Tell me, Shane.”
I nod, keeping my eyes closed as pain floods my chest. I have to take a deep breath and hold it for a second to steady myself.
“It’s been bad for a long while,” I say. “But the day I found out you’d been named by the ritual, we lost Liza. She was like a mother to me… To everyone in the pack.”
“Didn’t you have any other family?” Hyacinth asks. I shake my head.
“My mother died when I was very young,” I reply, forcing the words through my shuddering chest. “A rogue witch, or so they told me. I don’t really know. We blamed everything on witches, and now I don’t know what to believe.”
“I’m so sorry,” Hyacinth says, hugging me.
“Liza took care of me because my father was always too busy. Around the time I became alpha, my grandfather disappeared, and my father did, too. They were supposed to be searching for a cure. Things went bad so fast I didn’t really think about it—and we couldn’t stretch our resources any further looking for them. ”
“So you lost your Mom the day you kidnapped me?” Hyacinth asks, shocked. I nod, meeting her gaze even though I have tears in my eyes.
“I never forgot my real Mom, of course. I thought my world ended when she died, but Liza rebuilt it for me. She helped me realize the whole pack is my family, and she made me the alpha I am today.”
Hyacinth can’t hold my gaze and snuggles against my chest to hug me even tighter.
“I understand,” she whispers, her voice muffled. “And until we find a way out of this, not a single soul in this valley will have peace.”
Her voice has an odd ring to it, as if she knows more than she’s saying. As much as I want to ask, I know both of us are in a fragile state right now, and I’m still not done absorbing the news about her ex.
That someone could treat any woman that way is incomprehensible, but Hyacinth? She’s so warm and caring, but unbelievably strong. What kind of sick man would want to destroy that?
She snuggles closer to my chest, her fingers lightly caressing my sides. I stroke her hair some more, loving the way she leans into my touch, and relaxes against me with her eyes closed and a peaceful smile on her face.
No matter what comes of this. I will protect you, and I will love you, for the rest of my days—even if it only brings me pain.