Chapter 26
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
I’ve lost it. Full-on lost control of my actions, ripping at the bedding, throwing the bedside lamp, and banging on the windows. Nothing fucking helps. It doesn’t fucking do anything except to spark a tiny bit of something in Axel’s eyes before it’s soothed over again.
Fighting with Max got me away for a few months, and now he’s stalking me. What will fighting with Axel do?
But there’s no stopping now. No stopping until I get away. Until I find a place where there are no people and hide there for eternity.
I shake, looking around the room again. It’s sparse, with a dresser, a bed, and a closet. Almost like he planned this.
Fuck, he planned this.
Axel just sits against the door, eyes partially closed. Every time I move, he glances at me out of the corner of his eye. Otherwise, he just sits there. Doing nothing.
My heart is going so fast that I feel nauseous. I don’t have my knife. I don’t have my purse. I don’t have anything. He took it from me. Just like he took my freedom. Just like he’ll take what he wants from me, and I won’t be able to stop him.
The monster is creeping around the corner again.
I force myself to breathe. I suck in a breath, trying to lower my heart rate so my voice comes out as serious as I mean it.
It takes me a good few breaths. I watch Axel’s chest move up and down slowly as I fight for control.
When I finally get there, I breathe out, “I’ll never forgive you, Axel Newman. ”
When I say those words, something breaks free in my chest, and I realize I’m talking to more than just him.
Axel’s eyes close, and we sit there in silence for what feels like forever. Then, Axel lets out a breath. “Get some sleep.” He opens his eyes, looking straight at me, then away again.
He’s ignoring me. Ignoring my voice. A mixture of helplessness and rage bubbles up in me.
Trapped in this room with him with no weapons, there’s nothing I can do.
All of that energy races through me, and I feel like exploding.
Then, to my horror, tears well up in my eyes.
I’m scared and angry, and I can’t keep the tears in.
I start to cry. The sobs push through me, the terror from Axel and Max blending together into something I can’t control.
I sob and sob while Axel just winces and stares at the dresser in front of him.
I cry for a while until I’m spent. My knees shake, and I want to sit down. I need to, but I refuse to get on the bed.
I squat with my back to the wall so I can still see Axel. He doesn’t move. Exhaustion overwhelms me, and every limb feels heavy.
I stare at him, feeling empty. “Get out.”
“Not going anywhere, little bird.”
“That’s not my name.”
There’s a tiny smirk.
“I hate you.”
“Good.”
I sit in silence, but I’m not done fighting. My eyelids feel heavy, but I refuse to fall asleep. I’ll wait till he does, then strangle him to death.
It feels like it takes forever for Axel’s breathing to even out. His whole body relaxes against the door, and his head tilts to the side.
I eye the lamp I tossed at him earlier. It’s sitting right beside him. Maybe I could bash his brains out with it?
I wait for what feels like so long to make sure he’s really asleep. It feels like so long that I catch myself nodding off, but when I do, I feel hands on my pussy, and I snap awake, looking around in a panic.
Axel is nowhere near me. Hasn’t even twitched.
Fuck. The adrenaline is rushing through my veins. Slowly, inch by inch, I ease myself up. My muscles tremble as I try to maintain slow movement. Finally, I straighten, and Axel doesn’t move. Then, slowly, I take one soft step.
“Don’t even think about it.”
I jump, eyes wide. Axel doesn’t even open his, but he’s smirking.
I was so quiet. Does he have superpower hearing? Rage fills me.
“I promise I’m not going to hurt you.” Axel’s eyes open, and he focuses on me through his glasses. “I’m trying to help you.”
“Kidnapping counts as hurting.”
“No, it doesn’t.”
“Yes, it does!” I wave my hands at him.
He arches an eyebrow. “Where are you hurt?”
I stop, stumped for a second. My hand aches slightly from yanking on the cuffs. I snap, “My wrist.”
Axel straightens, a look of concern filling his eyes as his gaze locks onto my wrist. He moves like he’s going to get up.
“No!” I jerk my hand behind me, backing up. “It’s fine. It’s totally fine.”
“Let me see.” Axel gets up slowly, putting his hands out in a placating manner.
“Get away from me.” I skitter back along the bedside.
“If you’re hurt, I’m going to make it right.”
“I’m not! I lied.”
Axel stops prowling closer.
“I lied, it’s totally fine.”
He frowns, then shakes his head and turns back around. I relax slightly.
“Christ woman…” He lets out a breath. “You’re going to let me look at it in the morning.”
Fine. That’s fine. As long as he gets the fuck away from me.
Axel hesitates for a second longer, then returns to his spot at the door. After a while, my legs shake from standing, and I go back to my spot on the floor, once again locked in a stalemate.
Fighting didn’t work. There’s a rush of emotions—disappointment, anger, fear. And then, numbness starts to creep in.
So that kind of fighting didn’t work. There are other kinds of fighting.
I have to be smart about this. I will be smart about this. Because I’m no longer gonna let a man control me, even if it costs me everything.
If I can’t have me, no one can.