Chapter 47
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
It’s a long fucking night curled up on Gage’s bathroom floor with only a comforter. After hours of restless tossing and picking at my uneven nails, I give up and search through the vanity drawers.
Who the fuck doesn’t have fingernail clippers?
I search through the bathroom again. Everything hurts.
I even used the towels and rugs as a makeshift bed, but the floor was cold and unforgiving.
My head throbs, too. The only thing that kept me going was hearing Axel stomp down the hallway and slam the door.
I pissed him off. Finally. It makes a buzz run under my skin.
Finally, I find a pair of nail clippers buried under hair clippers.
I kissed Gage.
Fuck. My hands shake as I try to flip the clip around on the clippers with my bad hand. It’s harder than I expected.
I kissed the man I swore to hate, and I can still feel his lips on mine. His body against mine, all hot and hard. The way I wanted fucking more.
This is it. I’m certifiable. Men do nothing but hurt me, and here I am, fucking throwing myself at yet another one.
Kissing Gage was basically waving the come-hurt-me-I’m-available white flag.
My hands shake as I try to get the clippers angled right to clip through the thick acrylic nails on my left hand.
Only, without the use of my thumb, it’s hard as hell.
I try to position them on my thigh and press with the meat of my hand, which works until the clippers slip, sending pain through my finger and clattering to the floor.
“Shit.”
After a minute, there’s a knock at the door. “Raven?”
Shit! Shit, shit. I collect myself, making sure I’m not bleeding, then stand straight. Only Gage doesn’t barrel through.
“You okay?” His voice is deep, and he actually sounds concerned. Oh god. Is he concerned? I doubt it. Probably wants to get his dick wet.
“Fine.” My voice is clipped. Did he like the kiss?
There’s silence, and I think I hear him walking away from the door. I grab up the clippers again. Maybe I should ask him to help.
No. No way. I’m going to remove this unpainted reminder of Axel by myself. I don’t need part of the problem helping.
After a few more attempts, I’m nowhere near the power I need to cut through the nails. Sweat has built up around the base of my neck, my palms are sweaty, and my breaths are shaky. I can’t do it, and it’s enraging.
The bathroom is hot and stuffy, and the bedroom is quiet. I need to get out. I’ll try again in a minute, but I need to get out.
I burst out of the door, only to see Gage sitting on the bed, the morning sun streaming down on him, sans shirt. All of his muscles are on display.
I suck in a breath. Was he there the whole time? Did he hear me struggling? My cheeks flame at the idea.
“Raven.” He sits up straighter, regarding me with a cold look. The look is enough to douse me in a bucket of ice water.
Oh, so he didn’t like it.
Cool. That’s fine. Why would I care? I don’t. But my whole chest feels tight.
Throwing my shoulders back, I stalk to the doorway.
“Bed or bathroom?”
I stop, refusing to turn around.
“Where did we fuck?”
I whirl, and Gage only mildly raises an eyebrow. I’m about to lay into him before I realize he’s talking about keeping up the ruse. Some odd part of my chest jumps.
I meet his blank expression. Do I let him help me with the lie? Letting him help feels like a concession. But, as I stare at his masked expression, I remember that Gage hasn’t actually hurt me.
“The bathroom,” I grind. Then, I step out of the room.
Once I’m out of Gage’s presence, there’s an odd sense of… emptiness, but also a lack of that stifling energy, and I can suck in a breath again.
I consider changing, but I’d love for Axel to see me in Gage’s rumpled clothes. I’m getting breakfast out of the fridge when Gage stalks into the kitchen. He’s thrown on a light blue shirt, and I breathe out a sigh of relief that he’s covered up.
The relief is short-lived. Axel also comes striding into the room in a black shirt, wearing the glasses. At least, I think that’s who’s who. I confirm it when Axel looks me up and down with a tweak to his eyebrow. “You two were awfully quiet last night.”
For a second, I freeze. Axel just called us on our bullshit first thing.
“Gage isn’t a screamer.” I busy myself with opening the yogurt.
Someone snorts. “Damn, bro. Just as boring as ever, hmmm?”
I let out a tiny breath. Gage doesn’t respond, then I hear him ask, “Did you need help with these?”
I turn, and Gage holds the clippers. He gives me a small smile, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. It’s like he’s trying to look like he’s happy.
Before I can respond, Axel gasps. “You stay away from my work with those shears.”
I arch an eyebrow and turn to look at him. “I’m missing a pinky nail, and the others aren’t even painted.”
“I’ll fix it, little bird.” Axel’s voice is cheerful.
“No,” Gage and I answer at the same time, and my gaze flashes to his. He’s looking in my general direction, and his lips are in a hard line before he settles back into that impassive state. His kissable lips.
“No?” Axel moves over to me, a furrow between his brows. “Aren’t you missing one?”
His nearness starts to make my heart pound, and at first, it’s because I’m not sure what he’s doing, but then it’s because he looks just like Gage. And suddenly, I’m remembering the way Gage kissed me.
I straighten, trying to keep the blush off my cheeks. As Axel towers over me, I wish I had my bat. I remember how Axel bowed before me and my bat, and a stupid plan fills my head. I raise my left hand to his chest, then trace the nails down his shirt.
Axel freezes, watching my hand’s movement.
“Must have ripped off in the shower, huh, Gage?” I throw Axel a wink, then point my nails in and shove.
Axel steps back, and I stalk past him. My adrenaline is racing, and I can’t figure out if this aggressive route is the best or the stupidest idea I’ve ever had. Instead of second-guessing, I plow forward, stepping right into Gage’s space. “Will you fix them?”
Just like with Axel, I put my hand on his chest, but I don’t dig. Gage looks down at me, and his lips part just slightly. He looks like he’s sucking in a breath, and his pupils widen. I find myself lost in his gaze, and I can feel his heart pounding.
I know Axel’s watching.
Gage’s voice is rough. “I don’t know how.”
“Ax will teach you.” I turn to look at him, raising a challenging eyebrow.
There’s a flash of something on Axel’s face before it settles back into his flirty look. “I’ll do anything for you if you call me Ax again.”
I called him Ax without even thinking. A sinking feeling hits my stomach.
“I’ll get the stuff right now!” Axel moves out of the kitchen with too much cheerfulness. “Don’t start fucking on the counters, lovebirds. Or do. Just wait till I can watch.”
My face flushes, and I’m immediately thankful that Gage can’t see it. I take a step away from him.
“I don’t know how to do nails,” Gage says in a low voice.
“I just want them off.”
Gage gives a tight nod, and when Axel comes back, I’m standing at an awkward distance from Gage. Not close, but not far.
“Leave room for Jesus, damn.” Axel elbows me in the side, and immediately, I snap mine out, catching him hard enough to feel like hitting a wall. He doesn’t even take a step back. Fucking abs.
Axel laughs, “Where to, bitches? I need an outlet.”
We settle on the dining room table, Gage and I occupying the corner and Axel leaning across the table.
I wipe my sweaty palm on my pants before handing it over to Gage.
“Glasses,” he demands.
Axel smiles, “Sure! In exchange for a kiss from the lady. Since she’s handing them out willy-nilly.” Axel throws me a look that tells me he sees right through me.
“Fuck you.”
“Don’t be an ass.” Gage takes the glasses, then blinks as he tries to refocus on my hand. He pulls it up to his face, pulling my fingers this way and that to look at them.
“I may be an ass, but at least I’m not a liar. What color?” Axel gives me a look with eyebrows raised.
I grit my teeth. “No color. I want them off.”
“Sure more passionate shower sex won’t do that for you?”
I try to keep the anger off my face. “You know,” I pretend to consider. “On second thought, maybe just sharpen them to points.”
Axel wiggles his eyebrows. “Already blind, babe. Poking my eyes out isn’t going to help much.”
“How do you get them off?” Gage is still rolling my fingers around, then picks at my nails.
“You have to grind them down.” Axel reaches over, grabbing my hands.
“Don’t touch me,” I snarl, ripping my hand away.
Axel raises his in surrender, then starts explaining the process to Gage, talking while pointing at different parts of my nails. As soon as I put my hand back in Gage’s, I feel the sweatiness of his fingers, and there’s a slight tremble. He asks, “Won’t it hurt?”
“Not unless you’re a dick about it.”
Gage clears his throat, and I’d be upset about all this, except Gage seems more nervous than I am.
He keeps having to dry his hand on his pants.
And for some reason, that calms me. Although I’m concerned Axel is going to start calling Gage out on it, so when Axel isn’t looking, I slide my right hand under the table and pat Gage’s knee.
His gaze shoots up to mine, then the look calms, and he continues with a little more coolness.
During the entire session, Axel sends me secret little smiles, and when we’re done and my fingers finally feel normal again, I escape the table as fast as I can.
Axel follows me. “Such a shame.”
“What is?” I try to play it cool, stalking toward the laundry room to get my clothes from the dryer.
He just chuckles. “You’re both such bad liars.”
I refuse to look at him.
I can still hear the smile, his voice a dash of confidence. “Come to my room if you want a real dicking down.” Then, he’s gone.