Chapter 6 Quade
By the time the crew and I rolled back into the shop, I’d already run through a billion excuses why I couldn’t get Noa Green out of my head.
I was lonely. I’d only been out of jail for four months.
I’d been with a few women, but she was the first woman who didn’t look at me crazy.
I told myself it was just me—a horny man fixating on her kindness.
I told myself maybe it was the chair, the way her condition tugged at something soft in me.
But the truth was I didn’t pity her, and I wasn’t just some thirsty nigga.
It was her. The way her skin glowed, even under the dull lighting in her house.
Her smile, the way her eyes stayed on mine as if she could see past all my demons.
Noa Green was a dangerous beauty, and no matter how many excuses I tried to create in my head, none of them explained why she already had me wanting to permanently invade her space.
“Alright, fellows, same time tomorrow.” I dapped up Rico and James before I headed to my office.
I needed a quiet minute to map out Noa’s floorplans.
Maybe that would slow down seeing her every damn where I looked.
I slipped past Ron’s office and into my own.
I immediately spread her file across my desk and started scribbling measurements in the margins.
I needed to figure out what all needed to be done so the supplies could be ordered.
We were going to tackle this thing one project at a time so she wouldn’t have to be displaced.
The easiest thing to repair was going to be her ramp, and then I’d move on to the dining room.
Noa deserved a paint studio big enough for her talent.
I was already thinking about knocking out a wall and adding a storage area for her paint.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you work this hard.” Jess’s voice came sailing through my office, shaking me from Noa’s floorplans.
“It’s called doing my job.” I looked up at my sister as she leaned on the doorframe with her arms crossed, smirking.
“Well, it looks good on you.” She took a step inside. “I heard you’re leading a project. Why haven’t you said anything? We could have gone out to eat or something to celebrate.”
“It’s no big deal, Jess.”
“Bullshit. You’ve only been working here for four months, and you are already leading projects. That’s a big deal.”
I shrugged and put my eyes back on the paper. It didn’t feel that way to me. When you’d had half the world screaming your name, this kind of success seemed small.
“I’m only lead because everyone else is booked.”
She waved me off. “Doesn’t matter how it happened. We’re celebrating.”
“Please don’t.”
“Too late. I’ve already planned it.”
“Jess—”
She cut me off with a hand in the air. “Nope. We’re having a special family dinner tonight.”
“I’m working late.”
“No, you’re not. Did you forget my baby daddy was the boss?”
I let out a long breath, leaning back in my chair. She didn’t get it. She didn’t get that keeping busy was the only thing keeping me sane. I didn’t need dinner or speeches for doing what I was supposed to do as a man.
“You’re doing so good,” she said softer. “Most people wouldn’t be humble enough to do what you’re doing. You don’t see it that way, but I do. Your nephew does. That boy brags about you every day.”
I stopped writing and sat back in my chair.
My nephew always looked up at me like I was ten feet tall.
Since I’d been back, all he wanted to do was hang out with me, follow me around the house, and ride shotgun when I ran errands.
He didn’t see the mistakes I’d made. He didn’t see me as a man who was still trying to figure out who I was outside of the cell. He only saw the man I was becoming.
“Kid doesn’t know no better.”
Jess smiled. “He knows. He sees you showing up. He sees you rebuilding. That’s what matters.”
The door swung open wider, and Ron walked in. “What y’all in here talking about? Work? Or Jess forcing you into another celebratory dinner?”
“Both, actually.” She grinned. “Did you order the cake?”
“Yep, got the butter cream icing, just like you instructed.” He nodded, and I groaned, dragging a hand over my face.
“Y’all exhausting. Y’all know that?”
Jess grinned like she’d already won.
“She’s right, though.”
“About what?” I raised a brow at him, confused.
“About celebrating,” Ron said. “You been home a few months, Q. Working steady. No bullshit. Leading projects. That’s not small. That’s worth sitting down and taking in.”
I stared at him. Either Jess had rubbed off on him, or I saw what they had in common.
“It ain’t that deep. I’m just doing my job.” I shook my head, making Ron step closer.
“Nah. Don’t sell yourself short, bro. You got out, and you didn’t fold. You showing up for yourself. Most men in your predicament don’t make it this far. You’re making it. That’s worth celebrating, whether or not you like it.”
Ron’s words sat heavily on my mind. I wanted to brush them off, crack a joke, and get back to my blueprints. But nothing poured out.
“Dinner is at seven o’clock. Don’t make me come drag you out this office.” Jess’s tone was final.
“Fine.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Can y’all get out now? I’m working.”
Jess smirked, satisfied with her shenanigans, as she turned on her heels to leave.
“Supply orders need to be placed by Wednesday,” Ron said as he grabbed Jess’s hand and walked out of my office, shutting the door behind them.
When they finally walked out, the silence felt heavy.
I stared at the sketches spread across my desk, pencil tapping against the paper.
Their words kept circling through my head.
I was picking myself up off the ground, and maybe that was something worth celebrating.
I dropped my head and got back to work. Noa was depending on me, and that was motivation enough not to screw up.
For once, the work felt bigger than me, and I couldn’t afford to fumble it.
I turned slowly onto Noa’s street. I didn’t even know how I got here. One second, I was on my way home, and the next, I was exiting the highway, six stops too early. Noa Green had set up a permanent camp in my head, one that had me slowly easing my Hellcat down her quiet block.
“Nigga, you’re a creep,” I whispered to myself, shaking my head.
What the hell was I even doing right now?
I was riding past this woman’s house in the middle of the night, like I didn’t have better things to do with my time, like I wasn’t scheduled to be here for work in the morning.
I pulled a few houses down and parked my car.
I didn’t know what my endgame was here. Was I supposed to get out, go knock on her door, and pretend I was passing through?
Or was I supposed to sit here like a damn fool, staring at her dark windows?
“This is stupid, Quade.” I threw my car in gear and prepared to pull off until her porch light flicked on.
“Shit,” I hissed, freezing in place. Had she seen me?
Even if she had, my windows were tinted pitch black.
There was no way for her to know it was actually me sitting outside her house like a pressed ass stalker.
I watched as her door opened, and some dark-skinned dude stepped out, pulling his hoodie over his head before strolling down her walkway to his car.
My jaw clenched, and I didn’t like the jealous feeling that crept up in my veins.
The shit hit me so fast I couldn’t help but laugh.
Who was this corny nigga leaving her house this late?
It was after 10 p.m. She lived alone. It couldn’t be for her sister.
The thought that she had a man had me gripping onto my steering wheel.
“Nah.” I shook my head. “I’m tripping. That could be anybody.
” I drove off down the street. I didn’t understand why Noa Green seeing somebody had me so hot.
It made little sense. I’d just met the girl, and it wasn’t like I could step to her like that anyway.
I wasn’t a bum, but I felt like one. I didn’t have my own spot, was fresh out of prison, and was working a construction job.
I wasn’t the man I used to be, and I damn sure wasn’t the man I wanted to be, not yet.
Merging onto the highway, I tried to let my thoughts of Noa roll right out of the window. I didn’t have any business getting tight over who came or went from her house, just like I didn’t have any business even thinking about approaching her on that level.
“Just fix the house, Quade,” I told myself as I headed home. “Do the job. Nothing more.”