Chapter Five #4

rest of him would just get the idea and follow suit. “Thanks for

the sympathy.”

“Oh, God, I’m sorry.” Merou got his head up, wiping his eyes.

“That’s awful. Bloody funny, though. Back to our eliminations. Lad

isn’t repelled by me, and doesn’t prefer the girls. Kisses like an

angel, and a dirty-minded one at that, but doesn’t raise his flag.

How does that come about, then, blue-eyed boy?”

Priddy

hid his face. “I can’t tell you. I mean—the whole town knew about

it at the time, and then there were doctors, and then a bloody

counsellor, and... I just can’t face going through it with someone

again.”

“All right. But tell me anyway.”

“For crying out loud...”

But

Merou took hold of him and eased him down. He plucked a dead

sea-thrift, which regained life and fragrance as he trailed it over

Priddy’s sealed lips. “Tell me,” he whispered, insistent and gentle

as the murmur of waves in a cave. So Priddy laid his head on

Merou’s shoulder, and told him the whole sorry tale.

***

When he

opened his eyes again, he was alone. He pushed up on his arms and

looked around the deserted clifftop. There wasn’t so much as a dent

in the grass beside him to prove his companion had ever been

there.

Except,

bizarrely, a pile of clothes, neatly folded on a clump of heather.

Priddy scrambled to his feet. His T-shirt was there, his jeans,

everything he’d involuntarily loaned to Merou, down to the socks

and a pair of jockeys which must have indeed matched his eyes.

Priddy gathered the things up. He lifted the T-shirt to his nose,

hoping for a warm trace of kelp, but all he could smell was washing

powder and woodsmoke from festival barbecues and

bonfires.

Good

times. Priddy clutched the clothes and stood swaying. The last few

hours with Merou had been very good, apart from the terrifying

bits. Or maybe even including those, the close call with Doryty

Sharp, and the horseback ride. Priddy had never met a man he wanted

to share bad times with as well as good.

Had he

really met one now? The idea flashed over him that Merou might just

have gone swimming, so he ran to the edge of the cliff and scanned

the beach below.

Which

was just Portheras Cove, half a mile south of the lighthouse and

familiar as the back of his hand. The tide was low, not so much as

a hoofprint or footprint to mark the shore. Priddy’s concerns over

finding his way back to the car faded out, replaced by a deeper

fear. Slowly he turned round. The Vauxhall was sitting, prosaic as

day, on the verge of the Madron road.

The sea horse must have galloped in a circle. Or, as seemed

every second more likely, there never had been a horse, or a

gourmet breakfast, or a breathtakingly lovely nutcase called Merou.

Priddy wondered where he’d come up with the name.

Mer for the sea, he

supposed, and he had gone through a big Kerouac phase, back in the

days when he’d thought he might turn out to be a freewheeling

spirit, not a deck-scrubber in Rosewarne Cove.

He

minded the proofs of insanity much less than usual. His heart felt

emptied out—pleasantly, as if he’d confessed to someone or

something the story of his last few months, and met with no pity or

derision. Maybe he’d just told the sky, which was wintry again now,

deep-bellied cumulus rolling inland. He only wished—oh, wished to

God—that Merou had been real.

A note fell out of the pocket of the jeans. Priddy grabbed it

before the wind could whip it away. He unfolded it with unsteady

fingers, half expecting to find that he’d left a receipt in there,

an old shopping list. The paper crackled, began to disintegrate

under his touch. Sorry, Mountain

King, it said, in a pointed, beautiful,

barely legible script. I got a call and

had to run off on you. Don’t forget about the picnic. Missus and

kids—you know how it is. And underneath,

like X-marks-the-spot on a pirate’s treasure map, a single

kiss.

Priddy didn’t know how it was. By his own admission, Merou

didn’t either. Then, as gay as anyone

could wish didn’t necessarily preclude the

missus and kids. Perhaps a Mrs Merou somewhere loved him as he was,

and had conceived by AI or persuasion to give him the family he

desired. Priddy’s head spun in a vortex of mixed feelings. His

great wish had been granted: this note, written on fragmenting

parchment in squid-black ink as it was, confirmed Merou’s reality

in the most prosaic terms. But what kind of family man—what kind of

husband and dad—spent Saturday afternoon up a cliff, trying to coax

a hard-on from a stranger?

They were strangers to each other. Priddy had no excuse for his pang of

disappointment, for the reflection that Merou hadn’t seemed like

that kind of guy. Maybe his disappearance was just as well. For all

his many foul-ups so far, Priddy had managed to steer clear of

married men.

What

would he do if Merou turned up again now? Priddy’s virtue was

untried. No really attractive married man had pursued him. The

strange parchment disintegrated and blew away in a handful of

glittering dust. Holding the bundle of clothes to his chest, Priddy

made his way slowly back to the car.

She was

boiling hot inside, as if the summer day Merou had conjured still

lingered there. Priddy opened the passenger door as well as his

own, then flipped up the boot. Stood staring, one hand clasped

tight on the lid, at the wickerwork basket inside.

It was

like a bloody fairy tale, or a children’s yarn from one of the

books his mum kept in a box in the loft, dog-eared relics of her

own childhood, stories from a world where kids were sent off for a

day in the country with enough food in a hamper to stop an ox.

Carefully Priddy lifted the red-and-white checked tablecloth.

Beneath it, inexplicably packed in straw, was a bottle of

elderflower cordial and a handsome green-glass goblet—just one, as

if Merou had known that Priddy would end up alone. A brown paper

packet opened at his touch to reveal the kind of sandwiches he’d

used to yearn for while his mum slapped peanut butter on Mighty

White and tartly told her offspring to like it or bloody well make

their own—a big ciabatta bun sliced in half, well stuffed with good

Cheddar and, from the smell of it, a little Parmesan. Marmite

helping the butter to stick it all down. A string of jewel-like

cherry tomatoes, glistening fresh on their vine, and just to place

a mundane crown on all this glory, a bag of Quavers crisps.

Strawberries in a wooden punnet, mysteriously perfect despite the

heat, and a pot of Rodda’s best clotted cream.

His

first thought was that Merou had tracked down and interrogated Kit.

No-one else knew the half of what Priddy might like, in an ideal

world, to find beneath the lid of a picnic basket. But Kit wasn’t

always discreet, and not even to him had Priddy confided his

penchant for ciabatta and parmesan. Tastes like those would have

got him lynched in the lunch room at Land’s End Secondary. Merou

couldn’t possibly have known.

But the

whole bloody thing was impossible. Briefly Priddy entertained a

vision of Merou leaping naked into the Vauxhall while he slept,

racing back down to the village and acquiring this little feast

from the Costcutter. Well, he could’ve got the Marmite and crisps

from there. Everything else... Priddy gave up on the concept of

everything else, on the entire mystery. The food was there and so

was he. Further, he was hungry, just as he had been at breakfast,

his insides clamouring to be nourished and not just left to ache in

peace.

Priddy

spread the cloth, in honour of the day and his vanished friend. It

was really too cold to sit outside, but he settled cross-legged

with the picnic basket beside him, poured a big glass of the

cordial and held it up to the sun.

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