Chapter 10
All the way to Meryton, Mr. Collins spoke, but Elizabeth ignored him completely. Lost in her thoughts and in her feelings, listening both to her heart and to her mind and making sense of none, her steps took her forward absently.
Her sisters’ chatter and her cousin’s futile words echoed around her, meaninglessly.
The wind blew, chilling her face. Inside, she was almost freezing.
She wondered why she had even agreed to go to Meryton, as she wished only for silence and loneliness.
Maybe she should leave everyone and everything.
Go far away, towards Oakham Mount. All by herself.
“Look! There is Maria Lucas and Lieutenant Denny!” Lydia suddenly cried, startling her. The youngest sisters ran towards their acquaintances, while the three eldest and Mr. Collins headed towards Lucas Lodge.
However, soon they stopped, as Lydia waved to them and approached together with Lieutenant Denny and another young, handsome gentleman they had never seen before.
The introductions were performed and they found the gentleman was named Mr. Wickham, and was a friend of Lieutenant Denny, who had just joined the regiment the previous day.
Although she was still distraught, Elizabeth could not help but notice the pleasant features of their new acquaintance and his even more enjoyable manners. His handsome face was lit by a genuine smile, his greetings were amiable, his voice joyful and his words friendly.
Mr. Collins’s formal bending and pompous replies appeared even more ridiculous by comparison, and he was mostly ignored while the Bennet sisters talked to the officers.
Maria Lucas immediately invited them to her house, supported by Lydia and Kitty with loud enthusiasm.
They readily accepted, so the party walked together.
The girls spoke all the time, while Mr. Wickham responded only as much as necessary.
He was considerate and proper in every statement and every gesture and, by the time they reached their destination, Elizabeth admitted he was a welcome addition to a very poor day.
A moment before they entered the Lucases, the party stopped again.
Along the street, two riders approached, and Elizabeth’s disposition darkened again as she recognised Darcy.
His appearance caused all her tumult to return and, although she was uncertain of the fault she considered him guilty of, she could not bear to meet his gaze.
Therefore, she averted her eyes and gave her attention to Mr. Wickham, who was standing on her right.
She heard Mr. Bingley and Darcy greeting the party, then Mr. Bingley dismounted and approached Jane, enquiring after them.
“We called on you at Longbourn but we were told you had gone to Meryton,” Bingley declared.
“Yes…How fortunate that you found us,” Jane replied sweetly.
Immediately, an invitation was extended to them and Mr. Bingley accepted it.
Elizabeth did not look at Darcy but felt his intense stare burning her nape.
What was his intention? If he should join them inside, she feared she would not be able to stand his company.
Her distress needed a little peace before she could behave reasonably politely toward him.
For a moment, she was tempted to take the opportunity to ask him directly about the engagement but she dismissed such a dreadful idea.
To ease her nervousness, she glanced at Mr. Wickham; instead of the smiling, amiable expression she had met minutes before, she was astounded to notice a pale and distraught countenance staring at Darcy.
Finally, she turned to the object of her torment, but he was also different than she had ever seen him before.
He was frowning and his face was darkened.
Narrowed with fury, Darcy’s eyes threw sharp and painful arrows towards her.
That he was angry with her was beyond a doubt.
Their eyes met only for a short blink; without another word, he spurred on his stallion, departing from them at a gallop and leaving the entire party–including Bingley – in astonished puzzlement.
The party entered Lucas Lodge and were welcomed by the hosts. Drinks, refreshments, conversation and jokes delighted the guests. However, after only a few words exchanged with Charlotte, Elizabeth dreaded being in such noisy company and regretted her decision to leave Longbourn.
Mr. Collins continued his irritating attentions towards her, then quickly engaged Sir William in a completely irrational conversation of which Elizabeth heard just Lady Catherine’s name.
She withdrew to sit in a corner, away from the din, considering how soon she could leave.
Darcy’s appearance and sudden departure threw Elizabeth deeper into distress. She did not want to see him when he was there yet was grieved when he left in such a hurry.
She knew she had reasons to be upset with him because of his undisclosed engagement to Miss de Bourgh, but why would he be so angry and not grant her a simple greeting?
The previous evening, she had spent some of the loveliest moments of her life in his company.
Now, the joy had vanished and grief and torment had replaced it.
She admitted she was being unreasonable, that she was unfair to judge him so harshly at the beginning of their acquaintance, then so careless as to allow her feelings to grow in the wrong direction in such a short time.
Moreover, her father’s suggestion of forcing Darcy into a marriage, was dreadful and harmful. Now that she had realised her true feelings for him, how could she ever live with the notion that he was trapped for life with her?
“Lizzy, are you unwell?” Jane asked her gently. Elizabeth smiled with surprise at her sister and Mr. Bingley, standing inches away from her.
“I am fine, thank you. I am not in the best of spirits today, but other than that, I am fine. Mr. Darcy is well, I hope? He left so suddenly,” she asked. Her curiosity was stronger than prudence dictated.
“I cannot say for sure, but I will soon return to Netherfield and look for him. He was in a very good disposition this morning, when we decided to call on you. I cannot possibly imagine why he left in such a manner. But he was certainly not ill.”
Sir William joined them and enquired after Darcy too, but he received an even shorter explanation. However, accustomed to the changing moods of the ton’s members, he ceased any further questioning.
Steady to his word, Mr. Bingley remained less than half an hour, then made his farewell. Behind him, rumours and speculations began, blaming Darcy’s aloofness and his haughty manners for the sudden departure of the amiable Mr. Bingley.
Elizabeth’s anger increased, this time against those who amused themselves at Darcy’s expense. Despite her own hurt feelings, she took offence on his behalf and her desire to be away from those people grew stronger.
“Miss Bennet, may I bring you another cup of tea?” She startled at the sound of an unknown voice and was surprised to see Mr. Wickham on her left. He was again all joy and amiability, showing her the most charming smile she had seen on a man.
“No…thank you, no.”
“May I help you with anything? I beg your forgiveness if my boldness displeases you, but you look unwell.”
“That is hardly a compliment,” she laughed. “Even if that is true, no lady likes to hear it.”
He bowed to her. “I am certain you take my words as they were meant – proof of my concern for your wellbeing.” He paused a moment, then continued with apparent discomfort.
“I understand Mr. Bingley is a close acquaintance and a friend of your family,” he said.
“Yes, we are happy to call him a friend,” Elizabeth admitted.
“He appears to be a most amiable gentleman. I just found out he is a friend of Darcy. I cannot think of two more different people that are bound by friendship.”
Elizabeth watched him closely, with increased interest.
“You know Mr. Darcy, I assume.”
“I do know him. Too well, I am afraid. I noticed you observed his displeased reaction when he saw me. I hope his manners did not affect you in any way.”
She was indeed surprised by his boldness. For some reason, Mr. Wickham’s handsome features, his friendly manners and his decision of approaching her so directly, increased her testiness.
“Slightly; but I did notice your reaction when you saw him. And I apologise if now I am too impudent, but you seemed rather disconcerted to see him too.”
“Oh well…yes…It is just…I must confess that I have known Darcy all my life. I actually grew up at Pemberley. My father was the estate’s steward and the late Mr. Darcy, the kindest, most generous and honourable man that ever existed, was my godfather.
It is such a shame that his son did not inherit more of those excellent traits. ”
Elizabeth’s curiosity was now fully aroused and engaged. She eventually comprehended that Darcy’s hasty departure might be related to Wickham’s presence. He looked not just displeased, but shocked and enraged.
“I assume you and Mr. Darcy have enough reasons to refuse to be in each other’s company. It is unfortunate that you happen to be in the same town, at the same time.”
“Indeed. But his presence will surely not make me leave! He is the one who did me a great injustice, by refusing to comply with his father’s will. My godfather left me a living and wished me to serve the church, but Darcy denied what was rightfully mine.”
Elizabeth’s genuine disbelief made her less guarded with her words. “Surely this cannot be!” she uttered.
“I assure you it is true. As evidence, I am now joining the regiment with the hope of providing myself an honourable living, instead of serving in my own parish, near Pemberley.”
“But…why would he make such a dishonourable decision? What was it to him if the parish belonged to you or to another?”
“I can think of nothing else but rancor and malice…He was always jealous of the affection his father generously granted me.”
“This is astonishing…” Elizabeth whispered absently.