Chapter 9 #2
He wished to leave to clear his mind regarding Elizabeth.
And maybe he would be brave enough to speak to Georgiana and gain her opinion about the prospect of him marrying someone from a family below theirs.
He had never spoken of such matters to Georgiana, as he always considered her too young and too delicate for disturbing subjects.
But perhaps it was time to rely more on her wisdom, since he could not fully trust his own judgement.
“So, will you not return to Hertfordshire? At all?” Bingley asked in panic.
“I probably will, if you invite me again,” Darcy smiled, rubbing his temples. “I have no fixed plans yet, except visiting my uncle and aunt and enjoying some time with Georgiana.”
“When do you intend to go to Pemberley?”
“I am not certain of that either. I shall speak to Georgiana and will inform you. I hope you will have time to visit us while you are in town.”
“Of course! I look forward to seeing Georgiana too. Would you not consider bringing her to Netherfield if…some important event takes place in my life? Do you think she would dislike Netherfield? Or Miss Bennet and her sisters?”
Darcy frowned and rubbed his forehead, as pain filled his entire head.
“I am sure she would like Netherfield, as well as Miss Bennet and Miss Elizabeth very much. Probably the other sisters too, as she is so kind and friendly. But bringing her here is out of the question. I do not want her to meet Wickham. She was deeply disappointed in his behaviour, after growing up together and trusting him with her genuine affection. I cannot allow her to meet him again, under any circumstances.”
“Very well,” Bingley admitted reluctantly. “I accept your decision, but I hope Georgiana will have an opportunity to become acquainted with the Misses Bennet.”
“That will not be too difficult, Bingley,” Darcy smiled again. “If a certain event takes place, I am sure they will come to London very soon.”
Bingley’s face coloured and a broad grin appeared on his face. “Darcy, would you like a drink?”
“Very, much so,” Darcy answered. “A large brandy, please. And then I will retire to rest a little. I believe I have been sleeping poorly lately.”
Bingley handed him the glass, staring at his friend with great interest.
“I have never known you to rest at noon,” Bingley said. “Are you unwell? You look pale.”
“I am well, do not worry,” Darcy replied, gulping some brandy.
“I hope you will not pretend to be ill so you can absent yourself from the ball,” Bingley mocked him.
Darcy laughed. “Not at all, I assure you. I plan to be very present and even to dance.”
Bingley stared at him in disbelief. “Dance? Now I am sure you are truly ill; you absolutely must rest!”
∞∞∞
A day before the ball, with the rain continuing to fall, tragedy struck at Longbourn with Mr Collins’ return.
Although he had mentioned before his intention of attending the ball, nobody took it seriously and nobody recollected it.
So, when he knocked on the door in the late afternoon, he was received with surprise and reluctance.
“My dear Mr Bennet, my dear Mrs Bennet, my fair cousins, I cannot tell you how much I have missed you and what joy overwhelms me at seeing you again!”
“My dear Mr Collins, we are here to please you!” Mr Bennet mocked him in reply.
“We are surprised that you chose to travel in such weather,” Mrs Bennet added. “The roads can be hazardous. I caught a very bad cold myself a few days ago, but I thank God I am strong and I quickly recovered.”
“I am very sorry to hear that, ma’am. But a man should be brave enough to gather his courage when he wants to accomplish his goals,” Mr Collins stated. Elizabeth rolled her eyes while Mr Bennet took up the challenge.
“I see. And was your goal to attend the ball, or is there a higher purpose in your endeavour?”
A grin spread over Mr Collins’ face. “The answer would be yes to both your questions, my dear sir. I could not miss the chance of dancing with my lovely cousins. And Lady Catherine recommended that I do not return to Kent without news of my engagement. Therefore, I have hopes that this ball will be the opportunity to finally please her ladyship.”
Mrs Bennet’s eyes widened in delight. “Indeed, sir, this might be the perfect chance! My daughters will be delighted to dance with you, I am sure. And what better place and time for you to choose a wife?”
“Do you think so, ma’am?” Mr Collins asked, and Mrs Bennet took his arm, as they walked around the drawing room.
“Absolutely. Do tell me, what are your most important expectations in a wife?”
They paced around for a while and the girls excused themselves and retired, each appalled by the implied danger.
Kitty, Lydia, and Mary whispered and chuckled in the hall at Mr Collins’ stupidity, Elizabeth grew angry with her mother again, as she could easily guess the conversation between the two.
She gathered her strength to wage another difficult battle, praying that her mother would not expose them all to ridicule at the ball.
The night before the ball was restless and disturbing for Elizabeth but exciting for Jane.
They had not seen Mr Bingley since he brought them home, but they knew he had settled the matter of the carriage with Sir William.
He refused to provide more details to Mr Bennet–that way saving him from expenses–but they all knew the meaning of his actions.
Jane did not dare assume too much, although her heart spoke loudly enough; but she did look forward to thanking him in person.
The day of the ball was one of true chaos at Longbourn. Lydia and Kitty raced around the house, searching for dresses, reticules and gloves, continuously debating how many of the officers might attend.
“Lizzy, do you think Mr Wickham will come? I surely hope so! And I hope we will all dance with him! I am certain he is a wonderful dancer! He must be, since he is so handsome!”
“How could I know Mr Wickham’s plans, Lydia?”
“Oh, and Mr Collins told Mama he will dance with each of us! How horrible!”
“Lydia, keep your voice down. And please do not walk around undressed. Do you wish me to help you with your gown?”
“No, I am fine. Kitty will help me. You look very pretty, Lizzy. That dress is very becoming on you, and I like how you have put flowers in your hair,” Lydia said.
“Thank you, my dear,” Elizabeth smiled. “Now go and prepare yourself. Mama insists we not be late.”
“Mama hopes Mr Bingley will propose to Jane tonight. I hope so too; otherwise, she will force one of us to marry Mr Collins. I heard her saying that. I am afraid you will be the one, Lizzy.”
“I doubt that very much, Lydia. Both matters are very unlikely to occur, at least tonight,” Elizabeth concluded.
Despite her confident tone, Elizabeth felt rather nervous. She could think of nothing else but Mr Collins showing a ridiculous preference for her and Bingley’s sisters amusing themselves at her expense. Perhaps Mr Darcy too. And likely the entire village.
The family gathered in the main hall, and Elizabeth’s nightmare began when Mr Collins bowed to her and smiled from ear to ear.
“My dear cousin Elizabeth, you must allow me to tell you how charming you look tonight! And to ask you for the favour of the first set, if you are not otherwise engaged, which I hope you are not!”
Elizabeth paled and looked towards her father–who seemed utterly amused–and to her mother, who was glaring at her.
She breathed deeply and responded. “Thank you, sir. I am not engaged.”
“How fortunate! I am sure it will be a lovely night. I consider a proper ball to be a most acceptable diversion for a clergyman,” Mr Collins declared as they entered the carriage.
“Mr Collins, did I tell you that we broke Sir William’s carriage and Mr Bingley generously paid for it?”
“No, you did not, ma’am! This is extraordinary! How did that happen?”
“Mama!” Jane attempted to stop her, but Mrs Bennet continued to relate the details of their accident, insisting on Darcy’s bravery and Bingley’s care, all as proof of the gentlemen’s consideration for the Bennet family.
It was a relief for both Elizabeth and Jane when the carriage eventually stopped at the main entrance. Netherfield was lit by many torches, looking impressive and festive, as Mr Collins observed and Mrs Bennet readily agreed.
∞∞∞
On the morning of the ball, Darcy woke up with his head pounding and barely able to breathe.
It had been another sleepless night, in which he only thought of Elizabeth.
After all the torment and struggle, he realised it was in vain to conceal his feelings and to reject his desires.
When the dawn broke the darkness, he reached a truce–a peace within himself.
He was determined to go to London and talk to Georgiana, then return to Netherfield, to be near Elizabeth. He needed more time to know her better and to allow her the chance of knowing him better too.
When they first met at Oakham Mount, her behaviour towards him was rather cold and distant.
She was still carrying a grudge for his offensive remark at the assembly.
At that moment, he was only a strange man who had offended her undeservingly.
But since then, their acquaintance had improved and grown.
However, of the depth and the nature of her feelings, he could not be certain.
He had reasons to assume she recognised his attraction and welcomed it; yet much more was needed for him to decide to take the most important step of his life.