Chapter 15
A glimpse of light cut through the darkness and Darcy wondered if the dawn had come.
He did not know how long the night had lasted, but it seemed longer than usual.
He was lying down somewhere, but he did not recognise his whereabouts.
Nor could he see much around him. Some voices sounded familiar at times, but then faded and disappeared.
And, like a prize he could not reach–her scent, her voice, her nearness, her touch.
And another presence, equally familiar. Who could it be?
He had to see, or at least to ask, but speaking was as hard as seeing.
His lips disobeyed him as much as his eyes and his hands.
Was he imprisoned somewhere? Was he being kept against his will?
The sharp pain in his head blurred his thoughts, and then darkness again… Where had that light gone?
∞∞∞
The rest of the afternoon passed somewhat more calmly, though not more comfortably. The worry about Mr Darcy’s state remained equally strong, but the uproar in the house diminished as everyone returned to their chambers.
Miss Darcy, exhausted and sorrowful, refused any food or rest and preferred to remain at her brother’s side. A sofa was added to Darcy’s chamber–not comfortable enough to sleep on, but able to provide a small amount of comfort to those who were watching the patient.
In their room, Elizabeth and Jane shared a pot of tea and the former tried to calm her eldest sister.
“I hope Dr. Cooper will heal Mr Darcy. Mr Jones said he is one of the best doctors in England.”
“I hope so too, Lizzy. But he seems to be a severe man. And he spoke almost rudely to Miss Darcy, did you notice?”
“I understand he has been their doctor for many years, so he knows how he is allowed to behave. I think he tried to convince her to go to Netherfield and to accommodate herself properly. That entire discussion about the rooms became rather troublesome for everyone.”
“We made a spectacle of ourselves in front of Miss Darcy, Lizzy, and it was all my fault.”
“Yes, we did. I will not argue that. But the fault was shared among us.”
“Lizzy, I cannot possibly go to Netherfield. I simply cannot.”
“I understand, Jane. I have my doubts regarding your reasoning, but I will respect your choice.”
“Surely you noticed how close Mr Bingley and Miss Darcy were to each other.”
“I did notice, Jane. But to me, his behaviour towards her seemed completely different from his manners towards you. It was still very gentle and kind, but different.”
“I know, Lizzy. Because he was only being friendly to me, and I foolishly assumed more than I should have. To her, he has no reason to restrain or conceal his affection.”
“He was rather open in showing his affection to you, too, Jane. Nobody who saw you together doubted that.”
“I do not blame him, Lizzy. Not at all. And I do not blame Miss Darcy either.”
“If someone is to blame, it surely would be Mr Bingley. Miss Darcy has no fault. In truth, you both could be victims of Mr Bingley’s reckless behaviour in showing admiration for a young woman, while he was already bound to another.”
“Mr Bingley is amiable and friendly to everyone, Lizzy. We should not criticise those qualities that we once admired in him.”
“Very well. So you suffer, but he is faultless,” Elizabeth concluded, rolling her eyes.
“I do blame him, Jane, both for your pain and for Miss Darcy’s.
Thank God she gives no consequence to anything around her, as she is too preoccupied with her brother’s health.
If she truly has some understanding with him, just imagine how she would feel adding more turmoil to her suffering. ”
“I pity her, Lizzy. That is why I try to behave as properly as I can. I do not want her to suspect any of my thoughts. She looks so frightened that she might lose her brother. She does not seem proud and arrogant at all.”
“No. I believe she is rather shy and restrained. Quite different from Mr Darcy and from what I expected of her. I wonder how Mr Wickham could have misjudged her so completely since he has known her for so many years.”
“Perhaps Mr Wickham is not a good judge of character.”
“He must be one of the worst, Jane.”
A few minutes and a few sips of tea later, Jane spoke again.
“My presence at Netherfield would have been so awkward and distressing for Mr Bingley, for Miss Darcy, and for me. I know Mr Bingley tried to be polite and helpful, but his invitation was not appropriate. Not for me.”
“Jane, I am still far from being sure of Mr Bingley’s intentions. And I am too tired to consider it thoroughly. But why would he host a ball for you? Why would he call on us so often? Why would he dance with you and show his preference for you so openly?”
“Perhaps he did not believe he was doing anything wrong, Lizzy.”
“But why would Mr Darcy allow him to misbehave so utterly if he had a special connection to his sister? At first I thought Mr Darcy disapproved of Mr Bingley’s admiration for you, but lately, my impression has changed.
He has said many small things that show his change of mind.
He would never allow his friend to trifle with you. ”
“I do not know, Lizzy. I truly do not know,” Jane said, wiping her tears.
“Dear Jane, if I were not so exhausted worrying about Mr Darcy’s health I would really hate Mr Bingley for all the distress he is causing you. This situation must be resolved soon.”
“Oh, Lizzy, promise me you will not do anything,” Jane begged in panic.
Elizabeth embraced her. “As I said, I am too exhausted and so are you. I promise I will not stir the waters–at least for now.”
That evening, Mr Bingley came to dinner, but Mrs Annesley preferred to remain at Netherfield to rest. He visited Darcy briefly as he did not do so before and returned grieved and helpless, spending a few minutes in private conversation with Georgiana.
Miss Darcy and Dr. Cooper ate briefly and returned to watch Darcy.
Stevens still did not leave his master’s side.
There was not much conversation between the courses, nor any entertainment.
Rather early, Mr Bingley returned to Netherfield with Mr Bennet and his youngest daughters, disconcerted and tormented both for his friend and at Jane’s restrained behaviour. Behind him, the eldest Miss Bennet stared at the carriage from the window, heartbroken.
Mrs Bennet scolded Jane for a good few minutes, reproaching her ridiculous refusal to go to Netherfield. In the end, both retired to their chambers, allowing Elizabeth some peace and quiet.
Elizabeth took charge and brought Hill and John to change the sheets and to prepare the now available rooms–one for Miss Darcy and the other for any future guests.
The last two days had been so full, so tormenting, so tiresome that her mind barely noticed what her body was doing.
She walked up and down the stairs, wondering if her feet were still moving.
Eventually, when everything was settled, she attempted to convince Miss Darcy to sleep for a little while.
She met with no success, and she abandoned the fight.
She was too exhausted, and the entire situation was too nerve-wracking to start a battle she could not control.
So she returned to Jane, avoiding any further conversation.
When she fell asleep. It was almost midnight.
∞∞∞
Darcy had hoped for so long for the coldness to go and now, it had happened.
But the heat that enveloped him was even more insupportable.
His right arm was burning the most, and something was slowly licking the life itself from his body.
He knew he needed to do something, but he still could not move.
He shouted, but nobody responded to his calls.
Where was she? If she was there, she would have helped him.
She was ready to walk with him through the storm when they were trapped in the cottage, and she freed him from the horse’s reins when he had fallen.
She put her coat under his head, then she placed his head in her lap, and she held his hand.
She would help him, but where was she? If he could only shout to her!
He screamed, but not even he could hear his words.
He tried again and again, but he was still alone in the dark. She did not come.
∞∞∞
Elizabeth startled awake, trembling, her body shivering with countless chills, while her forehead was covered in sweat. A deep fear overwhelmed her, and she glanced around, wholly lost. She sensed she had to do something, something of great importance, and she had missed it.
With a sense of fright that something horrible had occurred, she tied her robe, quickly brushed her hair, and in moments she was knocking on Darcy’s door.
She found Miss Darcy, Stevens and Dr. Cooper all around Darcy. It appeared the doctor had released some of his bad blood, and his arm was lying at his side, bandaged, still bleeding.
The three were all so pale and obviously tired that they looked as ill as the patient. Miss Darcy especially looked so exhausted that Elizabeth wondered how she was still standing.
“He spoke!” Georgiana told her, tearfully.
“Did he? That is wonderful!” Elizabeth replied whole-heartedly, a huge burden removed from her shoulders.
“We did not understand what he said, but he spoke and he moved!” the young lady added.
Elizabeth ignored the impropriety of her gesture and touched Darcy’s hand, then his forehead again.
“He still has a high fever," she addressed Dr. Cooper.
“He does. Stevens and I were about to chill his body with some cold water.”
“May I help?” Elizabeth asked genuinely.