Chapter 13
Bailey
On Friday, I went to Riverton because I couldn’t escape thoughts of school. Two days later, I was leaving school because I couldn’t escape thoughts of Riverton.
Most especially, thoughts of Flynn and how I’d left things.
I’d kissed him, and when he’d told me something really huge—really scary—I’d run away like a fucking child. Maybe everyone was right to treat me like I was immature. Flynn deserved better.
My backpack sat in my passenger seat as Monarch ate up the miles. It was stuffed with homework I’d been too unfocused to catch up on.
I’d tucked my phone into a side pocket. The single text exchange with Flynn was still the only contact between us since I’d left his place Friday night.
Flynn:
Please call Holden. Let him know you’re okay.
Me:
I will.
Then nothing.
I’d started and deleted half a dozen texts. I wanted to apologize for leaving, but I also wanted answers. I wanted to understand.
That required a conversation, face-to-face.
I pushed down my accelerator, eager to get there. It was a good thing I liked driving. I was getting my fill with all these trips back and forth.
Holden had let me have it for driving home after taking a punch in the face too. Not that I was surprised. Riverton was too small to keep bar fights a secret.
He’d actually been less intense about it than I’d expected, though. He accepted my apology and said he never wanted me to avoid home because of him.
It’d been a good talk, in the end. We didn’t say everything that needed to be said. Neither of us was very good at that. But we’d ended on a more positive note.
The highway exit came up, and I slowed to change lanes. Flynn’s small cottage, in a little village of rentals, was only a few blocks from the highway. My pulse jumped as I turned onto his street.
I didn’t see his car, but he was probably just leaving work. I could have caught him at the auto shop, but I’d rather sit on his porch all night than face him and my brothers at the same time.
This wasn’t a group chat situation.
I grabbed my phone and climbed out of my car, happy to stretch my legs for a few minutes. I walked up to the small concrete porch and took a seat on the cold step.
Then I waited.
Fifteen minutes later, Flynn’s Buick Regal pulled in beside Monarch. Our eyes met through the windshield. We sat there, staring for a minute. Then two.
I wondered if he might decide to back up and drive away. Instead, he cut the engine and threw open the door.
Flynn unfolded his large body from the sedan, and damn, the man’s size never failed to stun me.
He could probably kill someone without even trying…
The stray thought didn’t unsettle me. In fact, it was a comfort. If Flynn killed someone, it had to be an accident. I refused to believe he’d set out to commit cold-blooded murder. And if he had, how was he out of prison already?
No. There was more to this story. I knew Flynn, despite what he’d claimed Friday night. He was big and strong, but he was soft inside. Gentle. Kind.
He approached the porch, expression wary.
“Hi,” I said, voice a little shaky.
He stopped in front of me. “Hi.”
With me on the top step and him on the ground, we were at eye level for once.
My chest ached. “I’m sorry I didn’t stay.”
“I’m sorry I pushed you away.”
“Do you want me to go away?” I asked uncertainly. “Or—”
“No,” he said quickly. “No, that was a mistake. The way I told you was shitty. I just…I’m not sure you should be with someone like me.”
“Let me decide that for myself? I want to know what happened, Flynn. I know that you’re a good man.” I pressed my hand to his chest. “I’ve seen how big your heart is. I know you’re not evil.”
His exhale was shaky. “Okay. Let’s go inside. I’ll tell you everything. You should know before…”
“Before?” I asked hopefully when he trailed off.
“Before you decide whether we should stay friends.”
He stepped past me and inserted the key into the lock. I followed him inside.
We stood awkwardly just inside the door.
“Before you tell me anything, I’d like you to do something for me. But I’m going to ask this time.”
“What is it?”
“Kiss me?”
He hesitated, eyes conflicted, then dipped down to skim his lips over mine in the sweetest kiss ever. I grabbed the plackets of his coat, holding on, as he wrapped a steely arm around my waist and lifted me a few inches from the ground.
My head swam, even as my chest glowed like a sunrise.
Flynn set me back on my feet, gently ending the kiss. It wasn’t a sexy kiss—aside from Flynn’s amazing strength always being a turn-on. It was a declaration of trust.
From both of us.
Flynn cleared his throat. “Um, let’s sit down for this next part.”
Flynn took my hand and led me to the couch, where we sat close enough our knees touched. He kept hold of my hand, squeezing almost too hard.
“You can still change your mind after this,” he said. “I won’t blame you.”
“Just tell me,” I said, tense now.
I believed in Flynn. I wasn’t going to run out of here no matter what he said. If he did something truly horrible, he was remorseful. He wanted to do better. That much was clear.
But the suspense was killing me.
I gave a little laugh at the turn of my thoughts. Jesus. That phrase, killing me, took on new significance when sitting next to a man who really had killed someone.
Flynn looked concerned. “Are you okay?”
“Inappropriate reaction. Sorry. Just nerves.” I took a breath. “Please tell me. Before I combust from the tension.”
“I killed my stepdad,” he blurted. “He was hurting my brother. He was abusive. After my mother left, I guess it got worse because she wasn’t there as a target anymore.
I’d moved out too, and Aiden was alone with all that anger and violence, and he called me one night, frantic about his dad being in a rage. I came over, and when I got there…”
My hand tightened on his. “How bad was it?”
“Aiden was on the floor. He was curled into a ball, hands over his head, not even crying out anymore as my father stomped on him like he was nothing but a…but a bug to squash. I charged him, furious. He took a swing at me. I hit him, and he went down like a sack of potatoes.”
“That sounds justified. What happened next?”
“Nothing.”
I blinked. “But…you killed him, you said?”
“One punch was all it took. I guess I put all my strength into it. I wasn’t much of a fighter.
My size usually kept anyone from fucking with me.
I didn’t know—” His voice broke. He took a breath.
“I checked on Aiden. He was bruised and swollen. His ribs were broken, and his lip split. I wanted to kill that bastard. Only, when I turned to snarl at him angrily, I saw that he still wasn’t moving.
I called an ambulance when he wouldn’t wake.
Right away, Bailey. I didn’t mean to do it.
I thought he’d have a concussion, that’s all.
But he never woke up. He died in his hospital bed a few days later.
And I was charged with second-degree murder. ”
“But you were protecting Aiden! He took a swing at you, too. It was basically self-defense.”
Flynn nodded. “That’s why it got bumped down to involuntary manslaughter. I did seven years. Not so much, considering I took a life.”
“Flynn.” I twisted to cup his face in my hands. “How could you ever think I wouldn’t understand? You were afraid for Aiden, and you didn’t know what would happen when you hit him. It’s a crime you went to prison at all.”
“I can’t think like that. I ended his life, Bailey. That’s not something I can wish away.”
I leaned in and kissed his cheek. “You feel guilty. That’s natural. Because you’re a good person. But I don’t blame you for what happened, and you can’t make me.”
I met his eyes, daring him to argue.
“I won’t try to push you away again, Bails. If you still want me, knowing what you know, then I’m not strong enough to tell you no.”
“Good, because it wouldn’t work.”
I kissed him again, and this time, he didn’t end it too soon. He pulled me forward, tongue swiping over my bottom lip. I climbed into his lap, needing to get closer, and kissed him harder.
He groaned deeply, chest vibrating against mine, as he crushed me to him. One large hand cupped my ass and squeezed, making me buck against him, desperate for friction on my stiffening cock.
He broke the kiss with a gasp as I rocked against the bulge in his jeans. “Bailey. Are you sure?”
I grabbed a handful of his hair to drag his mouth back to mine. “Yes.”
He stood up, lifting me like I was nothing, and I wrapped my legs around his waist with a whimper of need.
He was so big. So fucking strong. Damn.
Flynn carried me down the hall, pausing to press me against the wall for a breather. He moved his lips to my throat, nibbling.
“You’re so gorgeous,” he said, breath gusting over tender skin.
I craned my head back, happy to let him mark me up. To claim me however he wanted.
“Wait until you see me naked,” I teased.
A groan of need escaped him, and he lurched away from the wall to carry me to his bed. He dropped me onto the mattress.
“Let me see you,” he rasped.
The intensity of his gaze made my face heat as I pulled my shirt over my head. I wasn’t actually as confident as I’d tried to seem.
My experience was mostly limited to fumbling with curious high school boys who weren’t yet sure of their sexuality. I’d been too hung up on Flynn to do anything more in college.
But damn if I was going to give him another reason to get doubts about this. I tossed my shirt off the bed and shoved down my navy-blue sweats. Flynn helped me tug off my socks and shoes.
When I was down to only boxer briefs, I hesitated with my thumbs in the waistband.
“I wouldn’t mind seeing you too.”
Flynn glanced down as if surprised to see he was still fully dressed. His lips curled. “Sorry. You’re very distracting.”
I smiled tentatively. “Yeah? Not too skinny?”
Flynn shook his head. “Stop it. You’re hotter than the sun.”
Well, that was reassuring. I smiled and pushed my underwear down, shedding my last barrier.