Chapter 15
SIMON
“You don’t have to do this,” said Simon.
“Well, you refused to go to the hospital,” said Dexter.
He’d been cleaning up Simon’s wounds for a while now, being very careful not to hurt him.
His face was scrunched up in concentration, and he looked fucking adorable.
Simon wasn’t sure how he was so calm after everything that had just happened?
It had taken over an hour for the police to finish up.
Jared had been arrested, and Simon had confirmed he would press charges for assault as well as breaking and entering, although how he’d gotten in was still a mystery. Even the police couldn’t work it out.
There were both startled by the doorbell.
“Ignore it,” said Simon.
The bell rang again. Dexter carried on cleaning up Simon’s face.
There was then a loud, repeated knocking on the door.
“Is that your ex-husband come back to have another go?” asked Dexter, with a smirk.
That was a relief. At least he could joke about it already. Simon had an inkling of who it might be, so he jumped down off the kitchen island and headed to the front door. He opened it to find Daniel Harper, as he suspected.
“You’re alive, then,” said Daniel. “What the fuck happened to your face? You look like a cat had a go at you.”
“Well, you’ll remember from the divorce how much Jared spent on his manicures.”
Daniel laughed, and Simon stepped aside to let his friend in. It was then he noticed Josh was with him.
“You brought your bodyguard, I see, in case Jared was still here.”
Daniel glared at him, but Josh laughed, so it was all good.
“Come and meet Dexter. He’s in the kitchen.”
“Given he’s still here, I’d say he’s a keeper,” said Daniel.
Simon rolled his eyes and led the way into the kitchen.
He was in the lounge with Daniel, and Josh was helping Dexter clean up the kitchen. Simon had told them not to bother, he could just get someone round, but he’d been told to get out and leave them to it.
“I like him,” said Daniel.
“Well, I love him, so I don’t really give a fuck what you think.”
“Really? You mean my opinion’s not the only thing you need in life to validate all your choices. Just for the record, though, Jared was a terrible choice.”
Simon couldn’t help laughing. “I wonder why we both ended up with husbands who cheated on us,” said Simon.
“Okay, we’re going deep, I see. Was that rhetorical, or did you want me to answer it?”
“Answer it if you think you can.”
“I think it’s because we’re both fantastic in bed.”
Simon laughed. “How is that the reason?”
“We set the bar too high, and then, because they’re both greedy arseholes – and not just for money, but cock as well no doubt – they assumed the grass was greener elsewhere. Now they know they’ll never get dicked down as amazingly ever again.”
Simon cracked up. There was definitely more to it than that, but he was happy to go with Daniel’s assumption that his husband had cheated on him because he was too good in bed.
“To be honest, though,” said Daniel. “Imagine if they hadn’t cheated, and we were still with them now instead of those two in your kitchen.”
Simon looked toward the kitchen and could hear Josh and Dexter laughing about something. No, he couldn’t imagine what his life would be like without Dexter in it.
Simon leaned back and groaned. He couldn’t eat another slice of pizza, and would need a week in the gym to work off all the calories he’d just eaten, but fuck it, he’d needed a carb fest after the fucked-up craziness of today. He looked over at Dexter, who was watching him, smiling.
“What?” he asked.
“It’s good to know you’re not perfect.”
He snorted. “That’s something I have never claimed to be.”
“But to me you were. It made me feel like . . . I don’t know, like I might bring you down or something with all my shit.”
“Come here.”
He held out his arms. Dexter moved across the couch and leaned into him.
“What’s got you thinking like this?”
“I don’t think I would have gotten through the past three weeks without you.”
“You would have. You’re a lot stronger than you think.”
“I was still talking!”
“Ooh, sorry, sir. Please continue.”
Dexter chuckled, and Simon kissed the top of his head.
“As I was saying. These past three weeks, you’ve taken away so much stress from me, and known what I needed even before I did.”
Simon didn’t believe he’d done anything out of the ordinary. The man he loved was in pain. As much as he wanted to take that pain away from him, he couldn’t, but he could ease some burdens he was feeling from the responsibilities he had.
“Then we had what happened today, and what did I do? Freeze up. He hurt you, and I did nothing.”
His voice choked. Simon wanted to say something to reassure him, but he knew Dexter wasn’t done yet.
“And to make matters worse, for a moment I actually believed him. That you might still be married and I was the side piece. That it was why you’d never brought me here. Then I shook that off, because I know you love me.”
Simon loved him more than anything else. He could feel his own eyes watering, so he just kissed Dexter again, letting him finish what he wanted to say.
“Then you mentioned the injunction, and I felt hurt that you hadn’t told me you’d had to do that with your ex-husband. A man you spent a decade with, and must have loved as much as you do me at some point.”
Simon couldn’t help but shake his head. What he felt for Dexter went far deeper than anything he’d felt for Jared.
“But then I thought about it some more and ran a few other catastrophic self-involved scenarios through my head.”
Simon laughed softly. Dexter sat up and looked him in the eyes. They were wet from crying, and Simon instinctively used his thumbs to wipe away the tears.
“I think you didn’t tell me because you were worried it might scare me off, and you can get just as insecure about us as I do.”
Simon smiled at him and nodded. He could feel tears running down his cheeks. Dexter copied what he’d just done, wiping away his tears, before giving him a gentle kiss on the lips, smiling and then snuggling back into him.
“Right, now I want you to tell me what happened between you and Jared.”
“What?”
“Tell me how the fuck-up he made ended up being the best thing that ever happened to me.”
Simon laughed. Did he want to talk about Jared any more tonight? Not really. But Dexter had asked, and he’d be honest. He wasn’t holding anything back anymore.
“Why don’t we head to yours and I’ll tell you all the gory details.”
“We can stay here.”
“Really?”
“Of course. It’s your home, and Jared is locked up, so he isn’t coming back.”
“Still, I’m putting the chest of drawers behind the door before we go to sleep.”
“Sounds rational. Now, give me the deets on what turned the other Mr Woods into a psycho.”
Simon laughed again, pulling Dexter close before telling him the full story.
It was Sunday morning and they’d barely left the bedroom.
They were mostly just cuddling and being lazy, but he loved having Dexter in his space.
He’d also made an important decision. He was watching Dexter cook breakfast for them both, looking all relaxed, but after Friday, he swore he wouldn’t keep anything from him again.
“What would you think of me selling this place?” he asked.
Dexter looked up from the scrambled eggs he was cooking. “I’d say sleep on it for a week, and then if you still feel the same, do it.”
“Really?”
“I know this is your dream house, but it probably feels tainted to you now. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I would definitely be more than happy to live here, but –”
He stopped himself, his eyes going wide. Before he could say anything else, Simon put his hand up.
“Can’t take it back now. Maybe we could choose a new place together?”
“Aren’t people going to say it’s too soon?”
“Do you give a fuck about what other people think?”
“Yes. Everyone does, so don’t say otherwise.”
It was a fair point. No matter what people might say, everyone cared about what other people thought about them. It’s just that some people allowed that to affect the decisions they made. Simon wasn’t one of those people.
“We’ve basically lived together for the last three weeks,” said Simon.
“That’s because of the circumstances.”
“Which were very stressful, and yet here we still are. Look, I’m not going to push you. I just want you to know where my head’s at.”
“I’m in the same place. I’m just worried about what’s going to happen at work. I don’t want you to lose your job because of me.”
“I wouldn’t lose my job because of you. I made my own choices, Dexter. And I regret none of them.”
He looked down at the pan and finished whatever wizardry he did with the eggs that made them fluffy and not at all runny, which Simon loathed.
“Sit at the table. I need to tell you something.”
Simon felt his heart in his throat.
“It’s a good thing, I promise. Please take that look off your face.”
Simon smiled and took the condiments over to the dining table. He watched Dexter dish up their breakfast, which was just scrambled eggs and crispy bacon on a toasted bagel. It was nothing fancy, but always delicious. It was Dexter’s go-to breakfast dish.
The whole thing felt domesticated, and he loved it.
Jared had been the homemaker, and he’d cooked exquisite food.
Simon couldn’t deny that. They’d had clear roles in their marriage – the homemaker and the provider.
How he’d ended up in that dynamic Simon wasn’t sure, but it had never felt right deep down.
With Dexter, he had a man who was his equal.
No matter what Dexter thought about himself, he was stronger than Simon could ever be.
He’d needed to step up and be the parent from a young age, and he wasn’t afraid to show his vulnerability, something Simon had always struggled with.
Yet with Dexter, he didn’t feel weak if he showed his emotions; he felt safe.
Dexter placed Simon’s breakfast in front of him, and he couldn’t help but use his hands to waft the smell of bacon, eggs, and the toasted bagel up to his nose and close his eyes.
You didn’t need to be all fancy to enjoy great food.
Dexter settled down opposite him. Simon narrowed his eyes, causing Dexter to roll his eyes and huff, before getting up and moving to the seat next to Simon, meaning they occupied the corner of the dining table together.
He leaned over and kissed him before cutting some of the bagel and getting eggs and bacon on his fork.
He closed his eyes and moaned as he savoured it.
The eggs were perfectly seasoned. Bagel toasted just right and smothered in real butter.
The crunch of the bacon added the perfect balance of saltiness to all the flavours.
He opened his eyes, and Dexter was looking at him with heat in his. Simon chuckled before putting his knife down and reaching under the table. Dexter was hard, so Simon gave him a squeeze.
“You wanted to tell me something?” he asked, a casual tone in his voice.
Dexter glared at him before moving back to the seat he’d been in before. Simon chuckled.
“Jason called me when you were in the shower. He’s got the headcount approved for a head of TA. Obviously, he can’t refer me because of his no-poaching clause at JenSure.”
“Like I give a fuck about trying to enforce that.”
“I know you wouldn’t, but Alex can get obsessive about little things. Look at the whole Natasha thing.”
Simon nodded. He was still irritated that he could have wrapped the whole thing up in less than a week if Alex hadn’t been so stubborn, and not missed spending time with Dexter.
“You’re going to go for it?” asked Simon.
“Would you be upset if I did? I love working with you. You’re the best boss I’ve ever had.”
“Not that you’re biased or anything.”
Dexter laughed. “Fair, but I stand by what I said. I just think it’ll be easier if I go. You’ve got so much more you can offer that place. I’ve been there for three years. What more could I do there?”
“Plenty, because you’re brilliant.”
“Not that you’re biased or anything,” he quipped, making them both smile.
“You know I fully support whatever you decide to do, but let me share where my head’s at, and see if you still want to go for it.”
“Should I be worried?”
“No, it’s just I’m thinking of quitting as well.”
“Why? Not because of me is it?”
“No. I promise you that – though if only one of us could stay, and you wanted to, then of course I would leave – but no, it’s the job itself.
The whole Natasha saga was stressful, but I loved it.
Getting my hands dirty, sorting shit out.
I forgot how much I missed that, rather than sitting in committee meetings all the time. ”
“What would you do instead? I can’t imagine you not being the boss.”
Simon snorted. “Fair point. I’d like to be my own boss. Set up a consultancy. It’s something I’ve thought about before, but I was the sole breadwinner, so I needed the stability of a regular wage. I don’t have that with you, because you would never be a kept man.”
“God no. I need to pay my own way.”
“Not everything has to be split equally, though. It has to be fair and proportionate.”
“Spoken like a true HR professional, but yes, I get what you mean. I just need to have my independence, which means my own money and career.”
“If I leave, would that change your mind about staying?”
“You’d be the only reason I’d stay there. Working with Jason and Gabriel again would be a lot of fun.”
“I can only imagine the chaos you three would create.”
“Excuse me?” he said, with a mock clutch of his metaphorical pearls.
“In a good way, of course. Jason as your boss. That’ll be different.”
Dexter snorted. “He won’t ride my arse as hard as you do.”
Dexter went bright red, realising what he’d just said, and buried his face in his hands with a groan.
“I should hope he won’t,” said Simon, struggling to keep a straight face.
“Oh my God. Just kill me now.”
“I’d much prefer to take you back to bed for the rest of the day.”
Dexter laughed and looked up. He was still bright red, but smiling. Simon would spend the rest of his life making sure Dexter gave him that smile every single day.