Chapter 20
[Dart]
Aweek has passed since I nearly kissed my wife against the refrigerator. I’d come home from a baseball game, a little amped up from hanging with the guys and talking to Hutch. He knew I wanted my wife to date me, and he also knew I didn’t know how to make that happen.
He also reminded me just talking to her and being honest would help.
So I asked her what she needed. And then I told her how I felt.
I’m all in when she’s ready to wave the green flag.
I’m already all in the race, but I’m just keeping a steady pace, not looking to rush or pass her.
I’m just fucking thankful she’s keeping me on the track somewhere near her, which is why I couldn’t kiss her the other night.
I didn’t want to pressure her. And while she’d made the first move by kissing me a few weeks ago during movie night, I wasn’t going to be the one to make a second move. At least not physically.
Reminiscing about our first kiss—and the second one—was fun. And I’m hoping it pulled forward more positive memories for Trin. Not that they all needed to center on kissing or sex.
I just wanted her to remember us. The good times. The flirty ones. The reasons we were so attracted to one another.
Then again, I worried she might still hold onto the reason we fell apart, even if we’re being more open with one another.
Like I said, she is the pace car in this race. I am following her lead.
So, I’m surprised when she enters the kitchen, dressed in a flirty summer dress that accentuates her breasts and tips off her shoulders. She’s wearing flat sandals and has the front of her hair clipped back.
“You look pretty,” I tell her, because I can’t help myself. Like that image of her on my phone smelling a daisy, she looks like a summer flower.
“It’s RiverFest,” she reminds me about the local festival to celebrate the start of summer. There will be a crowd on the green space near the river. Music in the gazebo. Restaurants and craft vendors offering their wares. And an all-around excitement about the next season.
Eventually, the river will be more active with boaters, and a summer market will fill the green area every weekend.
I hadn’t planned to attend the fest. The guys each had their own plans for the day.
Hutch had his boys, and I didn’t want to intrude on his dad time.
Marshall was working the alcohol tent. Petty had something arranged by the mayor.
And Tate . . . well, Tate and I were still hardly speaking other than in baseball terms during the games.
As Trinity stands across from me, fluffing the dress she has Mirabelle in, one that matches the color of Trin’s pink one, she says, “I thought we could go together.”
What? I press off the island that I’d been leaning on and stare at her, certain I hadn’t heard her correctly. My heart leapt a mountain, and my breath seems to choke me.
“What?” finally staggers out of me.
“I thought we could go together. You, me, and Mirabelle.”
Like a family. It shouldn’t be my first thought, but I’ve been thinking so much about Trin and me. And Mirabelle. About how I want to be Mirabelle’s dad. I want to raise her alongside Trinity.
My heart races wildly, and I repeat my disbelief, “Really?”
“Unless you have other plans.” Trin’s voice drops a decibel, vulnerable even. Like it took a lot for her to ask me, and she shouldn’t be so hopeful.
“Yes. I mean, no.” I fumble, rushing around the corner of the island. “I mean, no, I don’t have plans. And yes, I’d love to go with you and Mirabelle to RiverFest.” I cup the back of Mirabelle’s head.
She’s grown so much since I’ve returned. Since she arrived. She’s nine weeks old and every day brings some new development. Some little change that feels so big, and I don’t want to miss any of it. I don’t want to miss her first word or first step. When she can sit up and eat her first food.
I still want to rock her at night, feel her snuggle into my chest, keep her safe from nightmares, and make all her daydreams come true.
Startled by this sudden invitation, I’m still not moving. Not saying anything. Just staring at Mirabelle before I look up at Trin. Her eyes bright and brown, and so warm, so inviting.
“Thank you,” I blow out, catching the emotion in my throat. “Let me just change. You look so nice.” I scan down her outfit again.
She smiles and chews on her lower lip. “Thank you.”
“Thank you,” I say again, running my hand over her shoulder before rushing past her to change into fresh jeans and a crisp tee. RiverFest isn’t anything formal, but this will be my first appearance in public with Trinity. And the baby.
I don’t give a flying fuck what people think of me, but I care about Trin. What people might have thought on her behalf. How they’ve treated her.
Rogue River is a small town. Certainly, news has traveled about how Mirabelle came to be and how I’ve returned.
And I intend to hold my head high and stand by Trinity’s side, taking any lashing I know I’ve earned.
Trin has me drive her sporty SUV because of the car seat. Parking is a struggle in the overcrowded town. Other than my visits to the ballfield and The Ferryman’s Rest, I haven’t been in town.
This little area comes alive for a festival, and RiverFest is no different.
“You excited?” I ask, once we park.
“A little nervous for some reason,” she admits.
My heart plummets to my belly. “Worried about being seen with me?” I try to keep it light. Almost a joke, but I’m concerned she’s suddenly having second thoughts about the three of us being out together.
“No.” She smiles warmly, reaching over to grab my wrist and giving it a squeeze before releasing me too quickly.
When Trin and I first started getting together, we were a secret. Sneaking off to make out at bars and eventually hooking up at her place, although it was never as casual as hooking up for me. When I pressed that I wanted to go public with our relationship, she hesitated, and I panicked.
“You don’t want to be seen with me?” I knew I would never be good enough, but her hesitation stung.
“Just want to keep you for myself a little longer.” It wasn’t a line. Wasn’t said in some cheesy way to appease me. She’d turned bright red and ducked her head, like she was embarrassed she’d admitted that to me.
“Why?” I’d been truly baffled back then.
She shrugged. “Just don’t want to share you yet.”
She never had to worry. She wasn’t sharing me with anyone. I was proud to have her under my arm and at my side. I was all in with her.
This time, I wasn’t certain what the hesitation might be, but I decided not to dwell. She invited me to attend RiverFest with her. We’d be surrounded by friends and family, and a community that loved her, despite what they might think of me.
I reach for Trin’s hand and pull it to my lips. “It’s going to be a great day.”
“Yeah,” she whispers, a little more confidently.
I pop open my door and round the SUV to open Trinity’s door. While she takes Mirabelle out of the car seat, I open the hatch to remove the stroller. The thing is quite the contraption, but opens easily and gives Mirabelle a space to be upright and shaded, and facing Trinity.
Mirabelle smiles up at Trinity as she smiles down on her.
Smiling is a new thing, and my heart nearly explodes every time Mirabelle gives me that little lopsided grin.
Her cheeks are so round and her eyes so vibrant yet dark.
Maybe she’ll even look a little like Trin when she gets older.
Same strawberry blonde hair. Brown eyes. It could happen.
As we walk down the street, Trin pushing the stroller, I set my hand on her lower back, helping guide her path, while also disguising the sudden tremor in mine.
Being here with Trin feels like a huge victory. One I will not take lightly. We’re making a debut of sorts. A reunited couple. That’s how I view us, but I need Trin to confirm that status.
To say yes to us.
As we reach the town’s green space, cramped with visitors on blankets and picnic benches, our first stop is The Babbling Bean’s booth.
“Well, Dart Rivers. It’s about time I saw you.” Mary Haven says, laying her hand against her chest.
Trin goes over to her mom’s house more than Mary has been to ours since I’ve returned.
The matriarch of the family exits her booth and hugs me so tightly, I nearly stop breathing. Mary gives some of the best hugs, second only to her daughter’s. She’s been the mother I never had, welcoming me into her home, and giving me her blessing to marry Trin.
She’s always been good to me, and I did her wrong.
Her hug says many things, but one of the biggest is acceptance.
The prodigal husband has returned.
“Mary.” I’m stiff at first, overwhelmed by her easy embrace, her forgiveness of sorts. Eventually, I hug her back.
When Mary pulls away, she cups my face. “Come by the house soon.” A clear invitation and indication that I owe her some answers.
She steps over to Trinity next and hugs her before leaning into the stroller to give Mirabelle a bundle of kisses.
“So precious,” she whispers to Mirabelle before standing upright and reentering her booth.
She rattles off a variety of specialty drinks plus her latest bakery creations. Trin and I both order an iced coffee concoction and then argue with Mary about payment. She wants to give us the family-is-free discount. Trinity wants to pay her mother, like any other customer.
“Did you read the book I gave you yet?” Mary asks Trinity. “The one where the couple is DTF.” She winks.
I’ve just taken a drink of cold caffeine goodness and sputter at Mary’s use of a common acronym for Down To Fuck. Coffee sprays everywhere.
“Mom,” Trinity groans, like an embarrassed teen, side-eyeing me.
“What?” Mary says innocently, clutching at non-existent pearls while speaking about fucking. “Did I use that term incorrectly?”
I chuckle, dabbing at the coffee dribble on my T-shirt. “Always a pleasure, Mary.”
“You use that pleasure elsewhere,” she says, nodding toward her daughter.