Chapter 6
Chapter Six
JONES
My heart drummed through my chest the entire ride to Ryan’s car. He sat in the back of the truck with Karla on his lap since I didn’t have a booster seat for her.
My idiotic brain told me I needed to remedy that right away. Never mind the fact that Ryan may up and disappear once more after I dropped him at his car, then I’d never see him or Karla again.
I kept glancing in the rear view mirror to look at him. Fuck, why did he have to be so hot? Seeing him again would have been a lot easier if he’d grown up to be a troll, or an evil villain like I’d sometimes imagined him to be to make myself feel better about being ghosted.
But he was neither of those things. Instead, he was still so dangerously handsome, and such a kind and patient papa to his daughter. Ugh, fuck. Why couldn’t he be the horrible dad I was mentally cursing when I’d found Karla alone in the woods ?
Instead, I was driving as slowly and safely as possible just to prolong the time I could breathe the same air as him. When we inevitably made it to his car parked by the main trail Karla had gotten lost from, they hopped out of my truck, and my breath caught.
Would this be the last time I saw him? Sure, we’d probably bump into each other, since the town was only so big, but that wasn’t the same. Those would be brief greetings that would only leave me longing for more time with him.
I hated how I still cared about him after all this time, after what he did…
Ryan carried Karla and stopped by my open window.
“Thank you again for today.”
“You’ve thanked me enough today to last a lifetime,” I replied with a rumble. All this gratitude made me feel like an outsider…which I guess I was an outsider to him now.
“I just want you to know I really am grateful for your help.”
I nodded, my hand tightening on the wheel. Now that he’d thanked me for the billionth time today, I figured the conversation was over and it was time to go our separate ways, no matter how much I loathed the idea of that.
But he didn’t leave, his eyes still locked on mine, and mouth slightly parted like he wanted to say something but was holding himself back.
That look had a bit of the scared, lost child he was when we first met, which was why I found myself taking the lead and blurting out, “I’m getting a dog—I mean I want to adopt one and was thinking about going to the closest animal shelter tomorrow.
I was wondering if maybe Karla wants to come and see the puppies too? ”
As soon as Karla heard the word ‘ puppy ’ her head lifted from Ryan’s chest, eyes big with excitement as she looked at her daddy.
I laughed, amused at how obvious she made her love of dogs.
“You just had to go and say the magic words,” Ryan said with a laugh and a shake of his head, but he didn’t sound mad. His eyes sparkled, and my stomach did backflips like it was an Olympic champion.
“You two should come tomorrow,” I found myself saying again, even though this was probably a terrible idea.
I knew what would happen when I let someone in. My ex betraying me was a prime example of that, and this wasn’t just anyone . This was the person who’d shattered my heart in a way I never wanted to experience again.
I’d managed to pick up the pieces the first time, but could I handle it if he broke me again?
“Are you sure we won’t be a bother?” Ryan sounded hesitant but slightly hopeful.
The part that wanted to protect myself yelled at me to take back my offer and make up some excuse to call it all off, but two almost identical pairs of blue eyes stared at me pleadingly. I’d always been weak for those eyes.
“It’s no bother. Are you living at your grandma’s?” He nodded, so I continued, “Great! I’ll pick you two up tomorrow afternoon. Let’s say around one?”
This time, they both nodded. I smiled at the way Karla’s head moved so quickly I thought it might just fly away.
Then, with one final wave, I drove off before their blue gazeswrangled more out of me. Next thing I know, I’d probably be offering them my cabin so they could have a place they could call their own. Preferably with me living there as well, so I could see them every day.
My snort rang loud in the silent cab, even though it was my own brain that’d conjured up that thought.
When did I become such a pushover? It didn’t help matters that, instead of going home like I’d originally planned, I found myself driving thirty minutes away to the closest supermarket, then spending the next hour in the baby section looking up reviews for the different booster seats.
I also purchased everything I would need for my new pet, and I told myself that was the reason I was so anxious to come shopping.
I returned home with my new purchases, unsure whether the lightness of my heart was a good thing. What I did know was that as I prepared my cabin for my new doggy friend, the place didn’t seem quite as lonely as it had that morning.
My friends were already at Hector’s when I arrived for brunch. They snagged the round booth in the back.
Atlas, the peppy waiter who’d practically all but forced himself into the job earlier this year, was chatting happily with Sam.
I heard Atlas had grown closer to the group these past few months with their weekly brunch dates. I hadn’t had much interaction with him, having been caught up with Deke and all, but the rare times I had managed to sneak out here for a Sunday brunch, he’d always been nice to me.
Seeing them all sitting there, laughing and joking around, made me realize just how much time I’d missed with my friends because I let a relationship get between us. I wasn’t going to let that happen again.
Ryker stood when he caught sight of me. He said something to our friends, then wove through the crowds to reach me.
“One day without seeing me, and you missed me so much you had to come and greet me personally?” I teased and pulled him into a hug.
He laughed and hugged me back with those beefy arms of his. I kept my arm around his shoulder when the hug ended and started to push us toward the rest of our friends, but Ryker stopped me.
“Wait, I wanted to talk to you first,” he said and led me to a more secluded area of the diner.
That got a brow raise out of me. “What’s going on, man?”
He shifted on his feet, the worry obvious in his eyes. My friend sometimes had trouble coming up with the right words, so I gave him a moment to gather his thoughts.
“I visited Sam’s Gramps and sister yesterday,” he ended up saying. I nodded and gestured for him to continue, since I had no clue where this was going. From what I knew, Ryker went over to the Monroe house every weekend, so what was so special about yesterday?
He didn’t make me wait long to find out.
“I saw him there. Heard he moved here last weekend,” he said softly.
I didn’t even have to ask to know who he was talking about. I was aware the moment Ryan’s grandmother, Granny Lottie, had sold her winery to retire, about a year after I last saw Ryan.
I also knew she’d bought the house next door to the Monroe family’s. I also knew the week Ryan’s mom, Auntie Mae, moved to town about five years ago to take care of her aging mother.
I had access to Ryan’s family and could have used that as a way to get in contact with him, but I never did. What was the point of asking someone the reason they cut off contact with you when they’d already made their stance clear?
Now, seeing him again, I wondered if plugging my ears from news of him for this past decade was the right choice, after all?
Ryker was growing more physically concerned by the second when I didn’t reply. His face scrunched up like he was sucking on a sour grape, though I doubt he even realized it.
I laughed, which had Ryker’s face wrinkling even more. I reached out to smooth it, slightly worried that his expressions might stay all wrinkly like that if he kept this up, then I’d have to face Sam for turning his fiancé’s face into… this .
“Thank you for worrying about me. You’re a good friend, you know that, right?” I said in reply.
Ryker beamed, and it was clear how important being a good friend was to him. He laughed and swung an arm around me, leading me toward our group.
“I figured I should warn you so you could try to avoid him in the future,” he said casually.
“Oh. I actually made plans with him after brunch.”
That had him stopping us right in the middle of the busy diner. People shot us glares at the sudden stop, then huffed as they moved around us.
Ryker was oblivious to it all and continued to stare at me, his face wrinklier than ever. “Why would you meet him again? You were so mopey our entire senior year after you lost contact with him.”
“I wasn’t mopey,” I grumbled, which earned me a side-eye from my so-called best friend.
“You were always different with him. I remember you used to disappear every summer because you refused to let the rest of us hang out with him. I never understood why you were always so possessive of him…” He paused for a moment, his eyes going comically wide.
“Jones, don’t tell me you liked him. Wait, do you still like him?
Is that why you’re meeting up with him now that he’s back in town?
Or is this to get revenge? Or do you have some kind of masochistic kink I don’t know about? ”
I let my mouth fall open at the sheer number of words that tumbled out of Ryker. He was usually the quiet one, so his speech was already surprising enough, much less what he said.
“No! I’m not doing this for revenge,” I denied, after soaking in his words. “And I’m not a masochist!”
“And it’s okay if you are. You know I’ll always love and accept you,” he replied.
“Well, I’m not!”
I didn’t know whether I should be touched by his quick acceptance or worried that my best friend thought I was into pain.
More people stepped around us, giving us a wide berth, and making me realize I was being a tad too loud. Our friends were openly watching us with amusement, while other townsfolk were more subtle in their glances our way.
Fuck, I could just imagine the wild things that were bound to spread through the rumor mill.
“And this conversation is over. C’mon,” I called to my best friend as I turned to walk the rest of the distance to our table.
Behind me, I could faintly hear Ryker grumble, “But you didn’t answer my first question!”
Yeah, I didn’t. I continued walking, purposefully ignoring both Ryker and the question itself.
The rest of our group were all sly grins as we took our seats, but they were tactful enough not to bring up the scene we’d caused just seconds before.
Atlas soon came by to take our order. His usually perfectly styled blond curls were a bit disheveled. The brunch rush probably had him a bit frazzled. He quickly took our order before rushing to help another table.
My friends chatted with each other, and I tried my best to participate too, but my mind was still on the question Ryker had asked and I’d chosen to ignore.
Did I still like Ryan? Even after all these years? I would be a fool to still be hanging onto feelings that had been cruelly rejected a decade ago. But seeing him yesterday with his daughter, and with the anticipation of seeing them again today, it had me tossing and turning all night.
Surely, I was no fool, right?
By the end of brunch, I was still all up in my head, though thankfully, my friends were caught up with their own things to notice. Sam and Ryker were flirting not-so covertly, and Clay and Dan were apparently in another one of their squabbles over who knew what.
While they were distracted, I paid the table’s tab as thanks for their help this past week. When Atlas came back with my receipt, he placed a plate of apple pie right in front of me.
“I didn’t order this,” I said, thinking he’d delivered it to the wrong table.
Atlas’ usually bright smile turned a bit sympathetic. “I heard what happened, but keep your chin up! Good things are coming your way. The same thing happened to me when I first came to Kither Springs, but it all worked out for the best.”
He shot me another grin and shuffled away before I could even get a peep out.
I was more shocked that a darling like Atlas had been cheated on than him knowing my own affairs. Even the walls had ears in this town.
But what shocked me the most was the fact that Deke’s betrayal hadn’t even crossed my mind until Atlas brought it up.
I hadn’t thought about my ex since running into Ryan yesterday. And if that didn’t tell me I was well and truly fucked, then I didn’t know what would.