Chapter 8
CHAPTER
EIGHT
Olivia
Theo’s little snuffles bring me out of the deep sleep I was in, and while I have to be careful because I hurt worse this morning than I did yesterday, I manage to get him changed and dressed before I get dressed myself.
Since it’s easier to carry him in the snuggle, I put it on then get him inside, his little coos making me smile as I head down to the kitchen to make him a bottle.
“Good morning, Olivia,” Constance says as I breach the doorway.
“Good morning, Constance,” I shyly reply as I make my way to the refrigerator to grab a bottle.
“Let me get that warmed for you,” she states, taking it from me. “Go sit down, we’ll get you some food.”
It’s then I see two other women who smile and wave at me. The taller one says, “I’m Maria.”
“And I’m Millie,” the younger one adds. “Do you want coffee or juice?”
“Do you have diet soda by any chance?” I ask. “And orange juice too, please.”
“We have both. How do you like your eggs?” Maria questions.
“Scrambled if it’s not too much trouble.”
The three women laugh as Constance points out several warming containers set up on a buffet. “How about I fix you a plate with a little bit of everything?” she queries.
Tears have my eyes smarting as she hands me Theo’s bottle so I can feed him. I’ve been the one taking care of everyone else for so long, I don’t remember the last time someone offered to do that for me. “That sounds good,” I manage to choke out.
With breakfast done, the three women shoo me away so I find myself in the huge common room wondering what I should do next.
I know a therapist is coming to talk to me this morning, but I’m honestly not used to being idle.
Shrugging, I sit in one of the recliners that faces the television, grinning when I see it’s on one of the local stations.
While I’m not a huge news person, if memory serves, game or talk shows will come on afterward, and by then, the person who I’m supposed to meet will probably be here.
A door down the hallway opens and I hear the thud of countless feet heading in my direction.
“Don’t panic, don’t panic, don’t panic,” I chant.
I didn’t really meet anyone yesterday outside of Rio, Doc, Constance, and of course, BamBam and Mongrel.
So, seeing the huge bikers as they enter the common room has my heart racing a mile a minute.
Some break off and head to the kitchen and I hear one of them tease another about second breakfast, which makes me smile. It’s funny how a movie can sometimes garner a line that countless people use. I’m definitely well fed this morning, for the first time in a very long time.
Jasper monitored how much I ate; he was convinced I had gained too much weight while pregnant, so when he was gone to work during the times he held down a job, he’d lock the cabinets and refrigerator.
I was allowed water to drink, but outside of the meager breakfast I ate when I fixed him his, I didn’t eat again until he got home and unlocked everything so I could prepare dinner.
Theo’s formula was a powder that I mixed with bottled water, so at least I was able to feed my baby.
Shaking off those morose thoughts because that’s my past and has no place here, I smile up at BamBam when he approaches me. “When the therapist gets here, where would you like to talk to her?” he questions, sitting on the loveseat that’s next to the recliner I’m in.
“I guess up in the room I’m staying in,” I reply. “That way, I can put Theo down for his morning nap.”
“Okay. So, while I can’t tell you everything that we discussed while in church, I will say this much. Your ex has filed a missing persons report for you and Theo.”
Anxiety ripples through me at his words. Jasper’s undoubtedly livid with me and if he finds me, I’m as good as dead. Black spots dance around my head as my chest grows tighter with each inhalation, my body struggling to draw in enough air to breathe.
“Slow, Livy,” Issy says. “Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.”
I don’t hesitate having been well conditioned by Jasper to do as I’m told.
The darkness starts to recede and I’m eventually able to pull in a deep, cleansing breath.
Over and over, I follow Issy’s instructions until the panic has receded enough for me to realize that the only ones who are in the room and aware that I was in the midst of having a freakout of epic proportions are BamBam and Issy.
And neither one of them are looking at me as though they pity me, which helps even more.
Issy squats in front of me and takes my hands in hers.
“I’ve had plenty of those,” she says. “But I want you to know, you’re safe here.
Even if that disgusting pile of pig shit manages to find you, none of the brothers will allow him to harm another hair on your head.
You’re under the Kings’ protection now, Livy. ”
BamBam pops up and says, “And nobody fucks with the Kings.”
Issy grins at him and teases, “That’s right.” Looking at me, she adds, “Dr. Harris will be here shortly.”
“Thank you for finding someone. I know I’m a broken, hot mess.”
“Not broken, just slightly bent, but all the best people are,” she replies. “I thought, after you were done, if you felt up to it, you’d like to meet my horses.”
“Oh, I’d like that,” I murmur.
“Then, it’s a plan. I mean, you might need to rest for a bit, but Starlight and Stargazer aren’t going anywhere,” she says.
The door to the clubhouse opens and in walks a woman who gives off therapist vibes. Okay, I don’t know what those are, exactly, but she’s walking toward us with confidence and self-assurance, both qualities that I sadly lack.
BamBam leans in and whispers, “Not for long, Pixie.” I smack my forehead with my hand as I realize that once again, I said what I was thinking out loud.
He winks at me then holds out his hands for Theo, who I reluctantly give over.
“I’ll run up and grab a couple of diapers just in case.
I think you should be able to focus on whatever Dr. Harris wants to talk to you about. ”
“I’m sure you’ve got things you should be doing,” I murmur.
“I’m doing them,” he asserts as he stands up with my heart in his hands and heads to the stairs.
I’m not as nervous as I expected I’d be as Dr. Harris follows me up to the room I’m staying in. Once we both settle in, her in the recliner and me sitting up on the bed with my back against the headboard, I look at her and ask, “What should I call you?”
“I know I introduced myself as Dr. Harris, but I’ve found in my years of counseling people that it’s easier if they aren’t hung up on ‘Dr.’ per se, so you can call me Elizabeth or Beth. Whichever you prefer,” she kindly states.
“Where do we start?” I question.
“Honestly, we can start wherever is easiest for you. Today’s more about getting to know you, but if you’d like, I can ask you questions to get the ball rolling,” Beth replies. “Let me tell you a little about Hope House first, okay?”
I nod because I have no clue what she’s talking about right now. I know I can’t stay here indefinitely. I’m sure there are rules about that as it is. “That works for me.”
“So, Hope House is a non-profit organization that was established by the parents of a woman whose significant other killed them due to domestic violence. She had tried all the legal things, the restraining order, pressing charges when he put her in the hospital, moving, getting a big dog who was trained for protection. Yet, the one thing that wasn’t available was a place for her or anyone else to get the therapy needed to heal from the abuse and understand that these men, and sometimes women, are systematic about how they break a person’s spirit.
She thought she was safe, so she went back one more time to the house to get more of her things, thinking he was at work.
Unfortunately, he wasn’t, and she paid for that with her life.
Her parents, wanting to do something to honor her life, started the non-profit and at first, it was all about awareness and warning signs. ”
“What is it now?” I ask, my mind trying to wrap around what this poor girl went through.
He’s almost killed you a few times now, Livy, my subconscious reminds me.
“Now, it’s so much more than that. We have a home, one purchased by the foundation, that houses up to fifteen women at a time including any children they might have, and provides on-site therapy, both individual and group, plus job training if needed.
We’ll also assist those who possibly need to get their GED so they can pursue either college or a trade, so they’re no longer stuck going back. ”
“Is there a place for me there? Will I ever feel like myself again?” I whisper, wanting to take control of my life back from a man who should’ve never been part of it.
My parents saw the signs and that’s one of the reasons we broke up right before graduation.
He talked a good game, but there were times he had a look in his eyes that scared me and when I told my mom, she and my daddy sat me down and talked.
I just wish I hadn’t been so scared after they died that I forgot.
“There is,” Beth kindly says as tears stream down my face. “Rio has graciously said that I can come here while you’re healing, which gives us time to get your room ready for you and Theo.”
“H-h-how long?” I stammer out.
“The initial stay is thirty days and then we evaluate to see if you’re in a good place so you can continue your therapy on an outpatient basis.”
I can see a glimmer of hope from what she’s said. I’ll be able to unpack all the baggage that Jasper left me with so I can be the best possible mom to Theo. “Hope House sounds amazing,” I murmur, almost to myself.
“It truly is, Livy. In fact, it’s so successful that the foundation is currently working on a male oriented place that does the same thing, since we won’t house men and women in the same place.
All of the caretakers at Hope House are females or female-owned businesses since the ultimate goal is for the inhabitants to feel safe. ”
Ironically, I’m in essence living with a group of men and I’ve never felt more safe and secure, but I don’t think I would if it were anyone else besides the people I’m here with at the Triple R.
A light knock at the door has me glancing in that direction to see Issy pop her head in, Theo in her arms.
“I’m sorry and don’t mean to interrupt, but your little guy needs a nap,” she says.
“No, it’s fine, I think we’ve covered a lot of ground today,” Beth replies. She looks at me and smiles before asking, “Same time tomorrow?”
I’m already off the bed and holding out my hands for Theo. “That sounds good to me. Thank you, Beth.”
“You’re welcome. Now, for your homework for tonight,” she teases. At my raised brows she says, “Get some rest because your physical healing is as important as the emotional and mental will be.”
Since I’m utterly exhausted and all I’ve really done is listen while saying a few things here and there, I’m perfectly fine with this assignment.