Twenty-Nine
TWENTY-NINE
VANESSA
The rustle of wind through the small trees in the front garden is a soothing balm. I roll to my back and sigh, lifting both arms to rub at my eyes. I lost track of time when I fell asleep, but it didn’t take much to drift off, thanks to a long walk along the river’s edge. It’d been weeks since I’d carved out the time for nature, and yet again, I chastised myself for leaving it so long.
My mind has never been clearer. Choices so obvious.
I move my legs apart and back together again, sweeping the bed’s surface for Murphy and coming up against nothing. Traitor. Likely out hunting field mice or perhaps keeping my stalker company. My stalker—shit. Eyes wide, I push up on my elbows and blink a few times to adjust my sight to the dark better.
Heart hammering at my chest wall, I work the room from left to right, squinting at the familiar shapes. Wardrobe, clothes pile, doorframe…
“Hi.” His rough baritone charges through the room like a whip crack.
The sheets fall to my waist as I scramble to a seated position, struggling to make out more than his wide profile at the foot of my bed. What little light the moon provides adheres to his paler features. Hands clasped before him, he sits on one of my dining chairs, elbows to his knees as he leans forward to study me.
I smack on my bedside light. Damn, he’s beautiful.
“How long have you been there?”
Chaos draws a deep breath, the intake loud in the space between us. “Not as long as I would like, but long enough.”
“Bad day?”
“You could say that.” He glances beside himself to the floor. “I bought you something.”
“Oh?” I lean forward a little, making out the rope handles of a paper bag.
“Yeah.” His gaze cuts back to me. “Not sure if I should give it to you, though.”
“Why not?” I smile. “I love gifts.” Hardly ever get them.
His lips roll, and I find myself staring at the hard line of his jaw. “It’s kind of a present for me, too.”
“Yeah?” I hitch an eyebrow. Now I’m curious.
Chaos leans back slowly, the chair creaking beneath him, as I untuck my legs from beneath the bedding and crawl down the mattress to the foot of my bed.
“What is it?”
He gestures to the bag with a tilt of his head. “Come find out.”
The fucking air crackles between us, charged with promise. I slowly stand before him, one leg after the other, gaze flicking between the bag and his impassive stare. With a gentle hand, I bend my knees a little and reach for the gift bag. It has no emblem, nothing to indicate what’s inside. Tissue paper embraces whatever he got us, the feathery edges tufting toward the opening.
“What’s the occasion?” I return to the edge of the bed and set the bag down to pull out the contents.
“Do I need a reason to treat you?” He tilts his head, a slight smile tugging at the very corners of his mouth.
Fuck my blush. My hair shields me as I stare down into the paper, fingers touching something hard and leather.
I tug the gift free, frowning at the tangle of leather straps and buckles. “What is it?” I turn to look at Chaos.
He sits with his legs wide, hands held before him, wrists turned up.
My fucking fingers tremble as I adjust the gift and find it’s more than one item tangled together.
Cuffs.
He bought me two pairs of fucking bondage cuffs.
I swallow, aware he still sits with his hands offered toward me to indicate they aren’t to restrain me ; they’re for him. Holy fuck.
“Are you sure?”
Chaos nods, chin dipped to study me from beneath his hard brow. “I want you to be in control.”
I’ve never been so fucking turned on in my life. To have a man so rough, so alpha in every other aspect of his life, submit to me? That is the gift.
“I only see one problem.” My words are slow and sure to avoid him recognizing how fucking intimidated this makes me.
“What’s that?” My God, the man can purr when he wants to.
“If I put these on now, I can’t get your clothes off very easily, can I?”
He smiles, pushing out of the seat to slowly stand. Jesus wept. Chaos towers over me when he’s so close, easily more than half a foot over my average height. It’s everything in the moment, a raw amplification of how juxtaposed this situation is. Chaos, the intimidating president of the Kings of Anarchy, stripping his cut and T-shirt to set them aside before offering his upturned hands again.
I could leave him standing like this and get myself off at the sight, I’m sure.
His hooded gaze drops to my mouth when I wet my lips and move toward him with one set of cuffs. His flesh is warm where my touch brushes against him, the cuffs barely big enough to accommodate his large wrists.
“Tighter.”
I suck a sharp breath and do as I’m told, tugging on the ends of the straps until the edges dig into his skin.
He leans down when my hands drop away, leveling our faces and captivating me with his mixed gaze. “Anything you want to do to me, I want it too.” I don’t get a chance to answer before he pulls away to move around me and climbs atop my bed, shuffling on his knees to the headboard to prop himself up. His legs extend wide before him, cuffed hands resting in his lap.
Hand to my throat, I take a moment to drink it all in. The view. The dynamic. The promise of what’s to come.
The sheer understanding of what it is we need to get through this bullshit time in our lives.
“As hot as it looks,” I murmur, moving to the end of the bed. “These have to go.”
He watches me intently as I unzip his boots and remove them with his socks one by one.
The heavy footwear thuds as it hits the floor, a drum beat rivaling my heart.
“Do you want a safe word?” It’s only fair that I offer him the same courtesy he gave me.
“Nope.” His cheek twitches. “You’ll know when I’m done.”
Right. No pressure, Ness.
His chest rises and falls with steady breaths; his inky tattoos are little more than shadows in the soft light of my lamp. How do I do this? Sure, when he’s in charge, it leaves me open to triggers, but at least it takes the pressure off. Now? Will I be enough?
“Stop overthinking it and just do whatever the fuck you want, Vanessa.” Asshole reads my mind. “You can’t do anything wrong.” His hungry gaze drags down to where his T-shirt brushes against my thighs. “Not when it’s you.”
“Anything I want, huh?”
“Anything.” His upper lip curls with the word.
The man is drowning in need, and I’m the one that can bring him relief.
Hands before me, I fall forward and crawl my way between his spread legs. His chest rises higher, breaths a little faster when I reach the apex of his thighs and seat myself on my heels. You can do this.
“I guess it’s only fair if you’re already topless”—I tug his T-shirt off and throw it aside—“that I’m the same.”
“Fuck, woman.” He exhales with a shudder, lips parted as he devours my bare breasts, fire in his hungry eyes.
Desire builds low in my gut, slick between my legs.
Neither of us will last.
I reach for the cuffs, take hold where they link between his hands, and lift his arms above his head. What I’d do for a goddamn hook right now. “Keep them there, and don’t dare move them until I say.”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
Yeah. Definitely me who’s going to explode first. I let my fingers trail down the swell of his arms to trace my way back to his shoulders. His nostrils flare as I shuffle my legs to straddle him, the distance too far to reach him properly without needing to lean forward for too long. My thin panties struggle to stop my arousal from soaking into his jeans.
“This is my favorite part,” I whisper as I palm the bulge of his traps against his neck. “All the way to here.” I circle my palms around his arms to the underside of his biceps.
His eyes slide closed, head lolling back to rest against the wall with a thud.
I’m captivated by the bob of his throat as Chaos swallows.
“How often do you do this?” I whisper.
“Submit to a woman?” he rasps.
I shake my head, even though he doesn’t look at me. “Give over control.”
Chaos presses his lips tight, swallowing again. “Next to never.”
I drag a fingertip across the line of his collarbone, relishing the twitch of his chest as I do. “You crave it, don’t you?”
“Don’t you?” He opens one eye—the blue one—peeking at me over the rise of his cheekbone.
I smile. “Maybe.” Not that I knew it until now.
But the rush. The thrill of knowing that I can stop this any time I want. That I set the pace. The rules.
That I can choose pleasure over pain.
“No more words.” I grip Chaos by the chin, forcing his head back.
He smiles, lips splitting to peek at his perfect white teeth, and damn it all if that doesn’t endear me to him.
I taste his joy. Set my lips across his and groan as he softens to my touch, allowing me to pull his bottom lip gently between my teeth.
I want to eat the man whole.
Chest against chest, I push against Chaos as we kiss, hips rolling in his lap. His arms flex, muscles bunching as he struggles to maintain their upright position. Breathless, I pull back, reaching high to take his cuffs and guide his arms so that he rests his hands behind his head, elbows wide. It's still not the most comfortable, but it’s better.
The evidence of his desire presses hard against the barriers between us.
I’m lost in his eyes, fingertips teasing the taut flesh of his throat as I absorb every twitch of his gaze as he studies me right back.
“I’m going to take your jeans off now.”
He swallows.
“You’ll have to help me a little with this.”
A nod. No words, just as I instructed. Good boy.
Hands to his belt, I guide the buckle open as I lay kisses to his inked throat, teasing the tip of my tongue across his Adam’s apple. He draws a sharp breath, brow pinching, eyes closed. The tail of his belt slaps the back of my hand, and I shift to the button and zipper.
His breathing quickens.
Thumbs inside the waistband, I coax his jeans lower on his hips, Chaos shuffling so that I can drag them under his ass. The denim scrapes against his thick thighs, bunching as it slides over his shins. I hesitate, halfway through tugging them over his feet to look at the ink over his legs. I haven’t seen him fully undressed until now. I hadn’t even thought that perhaps his art extended this far.
Two vicious dogs snarl on his lower legs; teeth bared, clipped ears sharp.
He swallows as though aching to explain.
I trace my thumb across the intricate detail. The almost visceral snarl of the dog on the right. So much anger inside.
Chaos draws a sharp breath when I crunch low and kiss each shin, tugging his jeans free in the process.
I understand. I really do. I have symbols of protection inked across me.
Hands circling his right leg, I trace my way back up his body, moving to settle between his legs again. His gaze tracks my every movement, tongue peeking out every so often to wet his lips, nostrils flaring, and muscle in his jaw jumping. They’re all food for my senses, encouragement to keep going despite my doubts.
His physical affirmations are incredibly arousing.
Enough that I don’t think twice before jerking his boxers down, tugging them the length of his legs to leave him utterly naked atop my bed and at my mercy.
Ass to my heels again, a shy smile tugs at my lips. “What would you do if I walked away right now and left you like this?”
His thick erection pulses. “Wait.”
Not that I could. My gaze drops to his lap again, and his stomach muscles clench in my periphery. On hands and knees, I lean forward, holding his gaze momentarily before I close the distance and steal another kiss. He stretches off the wall, chasing me when I break away.
The man’s arms have got to be burning by now.
I glance at his elbows, then guide his head forward to bring his arms over his head and in front of him. The cuffs clink as I unclip them. “Put your hands behind your back.”
Never breaking my gaze, he leans forward, repositioning his hands as requested.
I lean around his side, refastening them at his lower back. With the bulk of his muscle, he barely has the dexterity to do this, but I make it work.
Hand on his shoulder, I push Chaos back again.
He rolls his lips, and I drop my gaze to his dick, drawing a deep breath at the bead of precum that sits at the tip. My tongue darts to wet my lips before I even think about the action.
His stomach clenches and relaxes in quick bursts, heavy breaths gusting over my head as I kiss my way down the divot of his muscle, over the stiff washboard of his abs, until his wet cock taps at the underside of my jaw.
Fucking hell. I need this as much as he does, if not more. I swallow, moving one hand between my legs to rub a couple of small circles through the slick arousal, then lift my fingers to his mouth.
He dives on the offering like a hungry animal, wrapping his warm mouth around my digits.
I peer up at him from my position low in his lap, a fresh wave of heat rushing to my core.
With his tongue flicking at the tips of my fingers, I open my mouth and slide it over the head of his cock.
He inhales sharply, head hitting the wall with a thud again, and groans.
I move up and down a few times to spread my saliva, lubing his impressive length to take him to the back of my throat. His stomach tenses when I gag, hips jumping.
I do it again, rubbing the sensitive head of his cock against the stiff ridge at the top of my throat.
I play the game, alternating between swirling my tongue over the salty offering at the head, massaging the length with my lips and a little suction, and bottoming out. By the time Chaos squirms, balls drawing tight, I’m a wet fucking mess, slick arousal running down my inner thighs.
I pull away, earning a whimper of discontent.
“I need you to move.” I scoot to the end of the bed and stand, grabbing him by the ankle to indicate I’d like him to lie down.
He wriggles left and right, hampered by his hands behind his back, but manages to spread himself out on my bed.
I reward the fine specimen by climbing atop his shoulders and sitting my dripping cunt over his face.
Chaos doesn’t disappoint.
Holding on to the headboard is all I can do to anchor myself as he spears me with his tongue, laves at my opening, and rubs his nose against my clit. His muffled breaths fucking undo me, my pussy smothering him as he licks me to the edge of climax.
You play a dangerous game. Yeah, I do. But when the man places my pleasure above everything else like this, I couldn’t care less.
We can’t be picky with our vices.
We all have skeletons in the closet, and we’ve both bore witness and judged each other worthy regardless.
I grind against his face as the familiar tingles spread, one hand buried in his wild hair to grip him to me.
Not yet.
Chaos draws a gasping breath when I lift myself off him, his lust-drugged gaze fixed on mine as he licks around his mouth. The look alone has me creeping my fingers toward my swollen pussy, spreading myself wide and teasing the slit with my middle finger. He follows the movement, focus shifting to my ministrations, a soft growl echoing with his exhale.
I push a finger inside.
He looses a heavy breath, eyes closing briefly before he sets his gaze on mine. “Please.”
“Please, what?” I taunt.
His tongue slides across his bottom lip again, and he swallows. “Make me come.”
My thighs clench at the request, and I pull my hand free before I ruin things for myself. Twisting, I glance over my shoulder and find his cock thick with need, bobbing against his lower stomach. A string of precum bands between.
“Have you been a good boy for me?” I wipe the offering with two fingers and bring it to my mouth as I return my gaze to his.
His eyebrows peak. “Always.”
I make a show of enjoying the taste of his precum, eyes closed and a groan escaping from my wide mouth as I drag my wet fingers over my tongue. “Make me come first.” I drop my weight back to his face and shudder at the vibrations of his smothered groan.
Chaos eats my cunt like a fucking birthday cake, smashing his face against me as he brings me to orgasm. I rub my clit as his tongue pushes deep, curling to coax the evidence of my climax from me. Legs shaking, I rub over his bottom lip and chin, needing more friction as the peak rushes through me.
My frantic breaths match his as I tremble, lifting myself off him and moving to the side of the bed to recover.
Head turned, he watches me with a sated smile. “We should have done that so much sooner.”
I couldn’t agree more.