7
Silvia
Had I heard him correctly? How would he know my brothers? Wouldn’t I remember Tonio’s best friend? I studied his face, but I had no memory of him.
“Silvia, are you okay?”
“I don’t know. Are you saying you knew who I was before we had sex?” I felt betrayed. Like shouldn’t that have been a conversation we had before we did the deed?
He hung his head in shame. “Yes. I’m an asshole. Everything just happened so fast, and I didn’t try to stop it.”
He wasn’t wrong. I was literally trying to seduce him, so he’d take my virginity. I was using him. Desperate to be dirty so my brother couldn’t force me into a marriage I didn’t want.
“When did you find out who I am? And be careful, Andy. How you answer will determine how I deal with you.”
His eyebrows shot up. “Love your badass attitude.”
“Just answer the question. And maybe get off me.” It was best not to be connected to him for this conversation. It felt like he’d already slipped out anyway, and stuff was dripping down my butt crack. The sheet was probably a mess, too. Besides, wasn’t there some sort of aftercare following sex?
Oh, well. I guess we were doing something far more important than cleaning up.
Except, I wished he’d picked a different time to tell me he knew me when I was a child.
Not that I felt weird or icky about it. On the contrary, it was more like meeting someone for the first time and discovering we had a mutual friend. Kind of like, oh, small world .
He rolled off and grabbed some tissues, then gave them to me. Instinctively, I put them between my legs, but it didn’t seem to be enough. He’d come a lot. Way more than I’d expected.
“I found out last night,” he said in a serious voice, and he was back to being grumpy. “You were very drunk. Thought it would be better to wait until morning.”
“That’s fair. I probably wouldn’t have remembered anything.”
“My thoughts exactly.”
I stared at the ceiling, trying to process my feelings. I honestly didn’t remember him or anything around my fifth birthday or the years before it.
My therapist had told me I’d shut everything out the night of my mother’s murder and before it to cope. He’d said it was a normal thing to do having post-traumatic stress disorder.
Now I knew what my next question would be.
“When was the last time you saw me and my family?” Not that I had much family around anymore. They’d all died, except for Miguel.
He swallowed thickly. “It was your fifth birthday. I stood beside you while you rode a pony.”
“I rode a pony?”
“Yeah, you don’t remember?” He looked at me surprised.
“No, my childhood memories are fuzzy.” I didn’t know why I just didn’t tell him I had PTSD. It would probably clear up a lot of stuff about me, but I was a little embarrassed about it. It had been seventeen years since my mom’s death. Shouldn’t I have gotten over it by now?
He cradled my cheek and turned my face to see him. “You really don’t remember me?”
“I’m sorry, no. But that doesn’t make your deception okay. You should have told me before we had sex.”
“You’re right. I should have, but I’m telling you now.” He pressed his forehead against mine. “I’m sorry, baby. Will you forgive me?” The sincerity in his voice melted me.
“There’s nothing to forgive. I don’t remember you. And to be fair, I was trying to seduce you into having sex with me, so I’d be spoiled. I guess we’re even.”
He let out a deep chuckle. “Feel my heart.” He moved my hand onto his chest.
“Wow, I don’t think your heart is supposed to race that fast. Should we call a doctor?” I was serious. He could have a heart attack.
“No, I’m fine. I want you to feel what you do to me. Nobody does this to my heart.” He kissed me, then scooped me out of the bed.
“What are you doing? I’m dripping!”
“I’m going to clean you up, take a shower, then eat you for breakfast.”
“Excuse me?” My face flushed and I felt a tingling between my thighs. My lady parts appeared to be in favor of him eating me .
“Aww, are you embarrassed, Chiquita? You don’t need to be with me. I love pussy, and yours might be my favorite.”
Mine might be his favorite? I should probably be offended, but I wasn’t. He was the president of a biker club and not in a relationship with me or anyone else. He lived the single life doing what he wanted whenever he wanted. I wouldn’t judge him for it.
“Don’t you think we need to talk more about our mutual pasts before your face goes between my legs?” I asked him. It was a reasonable idea, or so I thought.
“You can talk, and I’ll eat.”
“How about you join me in the shower, and we can get to know each other better. Or refamiliarize ourselves with each other.”
“Sure, anything you want.” He pecked my lips. “I’m all for familiarizing myself with your body.”
“You’re too much.” I shook my head as my face heated.
Was I letting him off the hook too easily?
I wasn’t sure how I should act. What would other women do? I didn’t like conflict. Although, I could hold my own when push came to shove, just not with my brothers.
From the moment I met him yesterday , El Jefe treated me better than my brother Miguel. I sensed a protective side behind his grumpy exterior. I’d say he was a kindhearted man, but I hadn’t seen him treat the club girls the same way he did me.
He set me on my feet. “There are extra toothbrushes in the drawer. Hold tight for a second.”
Guess I should brush my teeth since he brought it up. My mouth was disgusting after all the alcohol I drank. I picked a pink brush. I wouldn’t even ask him why he had that color in his bathroom.
He returned with his phone in hand. “Needed to check my messages and order us breakfast. Saw you ate the menudo. When did you do that?”
“Around three in the morning while you were sawing logs.”
“I don’t snore.”
“Oh, yes, you do. But it wasn’t awful. It kind of soothed me. I don’t sleep well.” I twisted my lips. “Insomnia. A bowl of Cocoa Puffs helps sometimes.”
“I’ll send a prospect to the store to buy a few boxes.” He kissed my head, then went to the large shower and turned on the water.
“You don’t have to buy me any. I’m not staying that long.”
He stood there typing on his phone, ignoring me.
Oh, well. I wasn’t going to argue. I missed my usual comfort food last night. Too bad getting drunk hadn’t helped me sleep.
At night, I struggled to turn off my brain. In all these years, I hadn’t found anything that helped. Like my PTSD, the insomnia stemmed from my mom’s death.
Brushing my teeth in the nude it occurred to me that I’d never been naked in front of a man before.
All my doctors were females. I checked myself out in the large mirror, admiring my curves and breasts.
At the monastery, I didn’t have a full-length mirror in my room, so I had no clue what I looked like without clothes. I liked what I saw.
I spit, then rinsed. “Is it strange that I’m completely comfortable with you?”
Andy tilted his head and studied me. His dark eyes roamed over my body, and he licked his bottom lip. I leaned against the counter, letting him have his fill of me.
“No man has seen me naked before,” I told him. I always thought my husband would be the only one.
“They’re missing out.” He wiggled his brows. “You’re gorgeous.”
“Even with tissues between my legs.”
“I didn’t even notice.” He winked and nudged his head toward the steamy shower.
Wow, I liked how he made me feel all warm and gooey inside.
This biker was growing on me very fast. But I couldn’t stay. Miguel would find me, then what would happen? He’d probably kill Jefe… Andy .
I needed to leave the state of California to protect both of us.
But dang, I really didn’t want to.