12
Silvia
I couldn’t sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw Sister Theresa and Sister Lupita lying in a pool of blood. The scene felt familiar, like when I’d found my mom naked and covered in blood. Everything else about that day was fuzzy.
Sometimes I’d have a memory of someone else being in the pool house with her. A dark figure I couldn’t get clear in my head. For years, Tonio had told me I’d had a horrible nightmare. I believed him until he took me to a therapist to help me with my depression and insomnia.
During my sessions, I started remembering details, like Tonio had been the one to find me. He’d heard me screaming, whisked me away and drugged me. When I finally woke up the next day, I cried for hours over my mom being hurt, over what I believed I’d seen.
Tonio had tried to help me, assuring me I hadn’t been there, but I knew what I saw. Or thought I knew. Eventually, I suppressed the memories. That period of my life had haunted me ever since.
I had never fully recovered, though I tried to move on with my life. There had just been too many missing pieces to the puzzle of my mother’s murder. Like why and who? The authorities never caught the perpetrator and called it a cold case. I had my own thoughts about who, but I had no idea why.
One thing was for sure; I wanted him to pay and experience the same brutal death my mom had suffered—nineteen wounds from a switchblade.
When I was in high school, there was a girl I noticed watching true crime shows on her laptop during lunch. She had headphones on so no one had really noticed. She seemed to be alone, so I befriended Mavis hoping she’d let me watch with her.
But what I really wanted was to use Mavis’s laptop to search up my mom’s case.
My brothers had monitored my devices and wouldn’t let me have access to the Internet.
The only information I knew had come from them, and I hadn’t believed their version of what had happened.
Even now, at twenty-two, I was kept in the dark.
Sort of like now…
Throwing the blankets off me, I got out of bed. What had I been doing all this time? I finally had the freedom I’d dreamt about, and I was wasting the opportunity given to me.
I should’ve asked Jefe to borrow a phone. Or I could’ve requested to watch the news on the massive flat screen in the game room. Or maybe he had a laptop I could use. I’d prefer a computer. Everything was on the Internet, like what happened to the dear nuns I loved.
With Jefe being, I didn’t know where, how could I get access to a computer or cell phone? I really didn’t want to go down into the game room alone. I’d noticed there were always men engrossed in a sporting event.
But I knew someone who might be able to help me. Letty!
I ran out of the bedroom and made my way straight to the club girls’ hallway.
“What do you want?” Yoli asked in a salty tone from behind me.
“I’m looking for Letty.” I replied, not stopping.
“What for?”
“Will you leave me alone? It’s not like I asked to be brought here. Jefe helped me. And things just sort of developed between us.” I really didn’t like giving her an explanation about why I was in the club.
“I’ve known him my whole life,” she said in a quiet voice. “I thought he was my forever.”
I turned around hearing the sadness in her tone. I needed to see if it was real, and the tears in her eyes confirmed it.
“I’m in love with him.” She took several steps toward me.
“I don’t know what to say.”
“He loves me too. He just won’t admit it.”
“Well, that makes no sense. Why would he have me in his bed if he loves you?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. She couldn’t honestly believe Jefe loved her. I sort of felt sorry for her.
“He’s stubborn.” She shrugged. “Go ahead and have your fun with him. At the end of the day, he’ll come back to me. I can be patient.”
“But why should you have to be patient? You deserve to have a man who puts you first, Yoli. Not someone who disrespects you and cheats on you, if he loves you.”
She straightened her spine. “Obviously, you have no idea who bikers are. Life in an MC is a world all its own. Different rules. Different people. Different ways of living.”
“I understand and I like it here.”
Yoli hissed, “You don’t fit with us.”
“Hey, girls. What’s going on?” Letty asked, opening her bedroom door. She probably heard us talking. Yoli wasn’t exactly a quiet talker, except for that moment when she admitted she was in love with Jefe.
“Nothing,” Yoli replied.
“I came looking for you. I wanted to borrow something.” I took Letty’s hand and tugged her into her room. “Nice chatting with you,” I told Yoli, then closed the door. I leaned against it and exhaled a deep breath.
“What was that about?” Letty grinned like she hoped to hear juicy gossip.
“Just Yoli being Yoli, I guess. Do you have a cell phone?”
“Of course.” Letty took it out of her back pocket. It had a blinged out pink case.
“Can I borrow it? I need to do a quick search.”
“Don’t you have one?” She held the device against her chest. “I mean, our phones are monitored. Keywords will get pinged on an app the club has to alert them of our activity. I don’t know what those words are. You could get me into trouble.”
“I see.” I chewed on my bottom lip. I wouldn’t want her to get in trouble either. “I just wanted to check up on my friends.”
“Just ask Jefe to borrow his phone. I’m sure he’ll let you. Y’all seem super close these days.”
“Yeah, we are.” I smiled and went to the door. “I’ll ask him. Thanks for the help.”
“Sure, Silvi, anytime.” Her calling me Silvi was cute.
Disappointment weighed down my heart. I was desperate to learn what happened to the nuns. I dragged my feet down the hall, then was suddenly jerked by the wrist and pulled into a room.
“Ah!” I yelped.
“Quiet!” Yoli’s hand covered my mouth. “Someone will hear you.”
“What are you doing?” I asked through her hand.
“Are you going to be quiet?”
I nodded.
She removed her hand. “I heard you talking to Letty.”
“How did you hear us?”
“I have ways. Why do you need a phone?”
“Why do you care?” I didn’t trust this woman farther than I could throw her.
“I don’t really. Just curious. Maybe I can help you.”
“According to Letty everyone’s phone is monitored, so you can’t help me.”
“What if I told you I could help you.”
I narrowed my eyes. “How?”
“First tell me why you want a phone.” She stared at me smugly. Why would Yoli offer to help me? She had to be up to something.
“Okay. I wanted to check on two friends of mine.” The less information the better. I wouldn’t want her to be able to use something against me.
“What friends? You don’t seem like the kind of person to have friends.” She laughed, snorting through her nose like a pig. The sound took me aback. Like how could an attractive woman make that sound? It was so gross.
“Are you always this rude? No wonder Jefe—” I snapped my mouth shut. Don’t go there, Vee. Don’t get on her level.
“Finish what you were saying, or I won’t help you.”
“You forget that I didn’t ask for your help.” I rolled my eyes. “But if you insist, men prefer a sweet girl, not a puta.”
Her hand flew out and slapped me across the face.
“Ouch!” I yelled. “You’re crazy! You don’t hit people just because you don’t like hearing the truth!”
“I will do more than bitch slap you, cunt!”
Her words stunned me. How dare she call me that word. Women shouldn’t treat each other so cruelly. We should support and build up, not bitch slap or call names.
The door flew open, and a furious Jefe entered. “Don’t ever touch her again.” He raised his hand at Yoli, and I darted in front of him.
“Don’t!”
“Move,” he growled.
“No. I won’t let you hit her.” I pressed my hands against his stomach and tried to push him back, but it was like trying to move a concrete pillar. It was unmovable and could only be torn down by a bulldozer.
“I don’t need you to defend me,” Yoli said. “Hit me, Jefe.” She lifted her face to him in pure defiance against me. My gosh, she was crazy.
“Fine, have it your way.” I stepped to the side. “Go ahead and punish her, El Jefe,” I told him, utterly disgusted.
He grabbed my hand and led me out.
“No, I want to be slapped!” Yoli yelled after us. “Punish me for hitting your Chiquita. If you don’t, I’ll do it again.”
He stopped hard.
“Don’t listen to her.” I stood in front of him and cradled his face in my hands. “She’s just trying to get a rise out of you. Don’t let her manipulate you.”
“What were you doing in her room?” He lifted me off the floor and I straddled his waist, letting him carry me back to his bedroom.
“I was in Letty’s room first.”
“I saw.”
“How?”
“There are cameras everywhere. I went to check on you, and discovered you were gone. I panicked.” He gave me a chaste kiss.
“If you needed a phone so badly you could’ve asked me.
This isn’t a prison, Mija. You’re free to come and go as you please and move about the clubhouse.
You don’t have to be afraid of getting into trouble. ”
“If that’s true, can I use your phone?”
At his door, he punched in the code, then carried me inside. His silence was deafening and his grumpy expression made me uncomfortable.
He sat on the edge of the bed with me on his lap.
My legs remained hooked around his waist and my arms were looped around his neck. We stared at each other for a long second. I sensed there was something he didn’t want to tell me.
“What is it?” I asked.
His dark-as-night eyes drilled into mine. He was so handsome with tan skin and a five o’clock shadow that was always there. Everything about Andy appealed to me. His muscular body. His tattoos. His grumpy expression.
Sure, at first, he just seemed like someone I would never be attracted to; gruff and unrefined.
But the more time I spent with Andy, and the way he treated me, he was everything I never knew I needed.
Protective, maybe a bit over-the-top, like five minutes ago.
Sensual and passionate. Funny when he wanted to be.
Kind and loving, as displayed with his mother.
“It’s going to get worse before it gets better,” he said. “A helluva lot worse.”
“I don’t understand.” Was he talking about my situation or something else?
“Your face is everywhere. Around town. On the dark web. Miguel is going all out to find you.”
“I knew he would.” My stomach tightened. “I should leave.”
He firmly gripped my bottom. “No. It’s too dangerous. You’re safer here.”
“But what about you and everybody else?”
“We’re a ruthless biker club, baby. We can handle a war.”
“Hearing that doesn’t give me comfort.” In fact, quite the opposite. “What does war mean?”
“Just saying, there are a lot of Kings who would help us. We’re everywhere in the country and outnumber Miguel’s goons. But I’m going to try to avoid war.”
“How?” It was like he had a secret that might bring down my brother. Incriminating evidence, a smoking gun.
“I’m not ready to tell you. You need to trust me. Can you do that?”
“Why can’t you tell me if it involves me?”
“Because it doesn’t only involve you.”
I furrowed my brow. “Who else is mixed up in this madness?”
“I can’t tell you. Do you trust me?”
“I’m trying to.” I exhaled and rolled my neck, feeling more stressed than ever before.
He massaged my shoulders and kissed my forehead. His touch relaxed me, and the warmth of his lips melted me. This was why I needed him. Nobody put me at ease like him.
“Wednesday morning, my crew and I are going to Canada. We’ll be gone a few days.”
I reared back. “Can I go with you?”
“No, baby. You need to stay hidden. You’ll be safe here.”
I shook my head. “I can’t be here without you. Nobody likes me.”
“Sure, they do. They’re just guarded. All newcomers need to earn our trust.” He kissed my nose. “But I trust you.”
I hugged him tightly. “That means everything to me. I’m trying to trust you.”
“Let’s start now.” He slipped his cell phone between us. “Search whatever you want. I’ll get you a shiny new one before I go.”
“With a pretty case.”
“Of course.”
“And you’ll monitor my activity like the others.”
“You can count on it. I’ll be watching everything you do.” He hiked that dark brow of his just the way I liked.
“I’d say that was sweet if it didn’t sound so creepy.” I looked down at his phone. “How do I turn it on?”
After a quick lesson, Andy and I snuggled in his bed. He watched me as I searched for information on the nuns’ murder. It didn’t take long…
Their bodies were discovered behind the monastery; in the orchard I’d run through.
Both were stabbed a dozen times.
Hours later, a gardener was found in his work shed with a single bullet in the head. It had to be the one who helped Sister Theresa and Sister Lupita with the car I used. Poor man. I was sure he had a wife and children.
The police had no suspects. No weapon had been recovered.
Why did this feel so familiar? I couldn’t think about it anymore. It was too much.
“I did this to these innocent people,” I sobbed in Andy’s arms. “If I’d just married the mobster, they’d be alive today. Look what my selfishness did.”
“No, Mija. Miguel did this.”
I raised up and stared at him. “He can’t get away with this. He must pay for his crimes.”
“He will. We won’t let him hurt anyone else, especially not you.” He pressed his lips to mine.
“How can you be sure? He’s probably hiding.”
“Because I’ve already located him. He’s always been predictable. His habits are as routine today as they were seventeen years ago.” He cuddled me. “I’ve got men watching him.”
“Why not take him out?”
“I’ve thought about it. Not sure it’s the best decision.”
I growled. “He doesn’t deserve to live, Andy.”
“Don’t worry, Chiquita. He’ll get what he deserves, I promise.”