Forty-Five #2
“Just the ones who didn’t want to go home tired.” He rubs a hand over the back of his head. “Bossman and Cruiser have Darko’s room. I think that’s it.”
The uncertain way he answers the question makes him appear bashful. Almost adorable. Quit it.
“About last night…” Fang starts.
“You don’t have to explain.” I take an unconscious half-step back, cradling my coffee. I don’t want to hear it. I know what he’ll say, and I’d rather live believing he regrets it too without hearing so from his actual lips. Without the voice memo to match the memory.
Fang frowns. “I wanted to say,” he stresses, “that I never meant to hurt you. Then or earlier, in the field with Molly.”
“Bullshit you didn’t.” I snort a laugh. “You knew exactly what you were doing with your words every time you threw them at me like daggers. I wounded you, so you wanted to incapacitate me.”
His jaw tightens, a muscle feathering along the sharp line as he searches for his next words. “I’ve got a lot to figure out, all right? And I dragged you into that.”
“You did. Yeah.” I’m so tired of fighting. “But I’m also in no place to be tossing stones around.” I swallow, shame rising fast as I push through the next words. “I’ve complicated things here by not being honest from the start, and that falls on me and my fears. If I was braver—”
“You’re plenty brave enough.”
“If I was braver,” I repeat, “I would have shared what I knew from the start instead of trying to protect myself.”
His frown deepens. “Only a person with a death wish would be that open.”
“You think?” I stare into his emerald eyes, willing him to hear what I didn’t say.
His throat bobs, the insinuation resonating.
“I need a fucking piss.” Mongrel drags himself off the sofa and exits the room with a sleepy amble.
I exchange a look with Fang and sigh. I’ve barely been awake an hour, and already I’m exhausted.
The coffee cup rattles when I set it aside on the small, round table.
“I’ve been thinking.” He stays rigid, waiting for me to elaborate.
“If I give Maisie a call today, maybe she can help find me somewhere to go until I get on my feet. I’ve got funds in my account.
” At least, I hope I still do. “That’s not the issue.
It’s making them stretch until I figure out what’s next.
Where to start over.” The paltry amount of caffeine I’ve consumed turns in my stomach. “Where I’m likely to be safe.”
“What makes you think you’re leaving this place?” He lifts an eyebrow.
I shrug. “Didn’t manage to get my father here, and after last night I’m guessing the softly, softly approach is off the table anyway. There’s no use for me to stay anymore.”
“Jenna,” he says in a mildly condescending and majorly irritating way. “You killed Anna’s sister. You can’t just walk away from that.”
“Can’t I?” Because I spent half the night planning where I could go where cash work might be an option.
Where I could change my name without anyone questioning its legitimacy.
“If you mean to turn me in, Nibbles, then do it now.” I hold out my wrists.
“I’m fucking tired of wondering when and if the scratchy noose around my neck will pull taut.
Just give me something definite. Please. ”
He gently pushes my arms to my sides, then resumes our physical distance. “If we’re going to talk about this, I want time to do it right.” His nostrils flare. “Promise me you’ll stick around until I’ve got that time, okay?”
“You’re asking me to stay in limbo? To wait in purgatory until you’re ready?”
“Until we’re ready to face this with level heads.” He moves toward me, foot mid-stride, when an exaggerated throat-clearing has him stop dead in his tracks. Damnit.
“Is this not a great time?”
I look toward the source of the honeyed sass and find a striking blonde in the doorway, hair piled high in a messy bun and her clothes doing nothing to diminish her enviable hourglass figure.
“Reno.” Fang visibly tenses, all signs of the man he was seconds ago shut off and pushed aside.
“When were you going to call and let me know, Fang?” The woman strides into the room and parks her juicy ass into the seat—right beside me.
Her fucking knee touches the back of my leg.
I refuse to move and play into her game.
“Molly’s safe.” Fang shifts to stand closer to me, as close as he can to shield me from her without standing in her goddamn lap, that is. “We’re busy.”
“A goddamn truck tried to mow down our daughter,” she growls. “And you tell me you’re too busy to let me know she’s okay? To tell me before I had to read it in the goddamn Tribune?”
Something about that final word has Fang jolt. “What did it say?”
“What does it matter what it said?” Reno retorts, leaning forward in the seat and craning her neck to glare at him. “You didn’t fucking call me!”
I take a step sideways with the intent to leave.
Her talon-tipped fingers wrap around my leg. “Stay.”
Goddamn, I’m tired of being told what to do.
“Get your fucking hand off me.”
Glossy lips part into a sinister smile. “Know your place, honey.”
“Let her go,” Fang growls.
The room falls quiet, save for our breaths as the standoff escalates.
Reno’s hand tightens around my leg, just below the knee.
She leans closer, sneering at Fang. “So what? I finally leave, and now the bitches get a voice? What’s she got that I didn’t, Fang?
What’s she giving the boys to get those special privileges? ”
“It was never a privilege to be heard, Reno.” He leans down, face an inch from hers as he bands his large hand around her delicate wrist and squeezes. “It was just that everybody was tired of hearing your shit.” His thumb makes an indent between the tendons.
She winces. “Leave a bruise and see what that gets you.”
“Let go, Fang.” It’s not worth it. Not worth the ammo it would give her if he ever needs to contest Molly’s care. “She’s not worth your time.”
He rolls his jaw and unhands her, stepping back with a disgruntled exhalation.
“Me, on the other hand,” I say, twisting in her grip to face her. “I’ve got nothing left to lose.”