Chapter 3 #2
“I acted inappropriately,” he rasped, not quite meeting my eyes.
“I also put you in an uncomfortable position, and for that I wholeheartedly apologize.” His voice wavered, and Louise’s mouth tightened in silent warning.
“I understand if you want to file a complaint, and, umm, well, you’re of course within your rights to do so, but if it’s any consolation, I’m taking a step back from the company to spend some time with my family.
Leah Sharpe will be taking over my clients and my position in the company. ”
Leah Sharpe was another partner and a ballbuster.
I liked her; she was fair, and although she expected a lot from us, she was also the first to offer support.
I always wished I’d been assigned to her, but when I got my internship, she was already mentoring another architect, so I was stuck with Richard.
At the time, I thought it was a coup; he was well known within the industry and had even founded the company.
Little did I know he was a fucking perv.
Louise sat forward. “Richard will be removed from any projects you’re involved with and will be replaced with Leah.
I’ve looked over your hours and can see you’ve done a lot of overtime that wasn’t officially recorded.
By my calculations, you have approximately fifty hours left of your work placement, which means you have approximately a week and a half left if you work full-time hours.
However, we’ll honor your contract and pay you until June; plus, we’ll add a bonus for all your hard work.
Richard has contacts all over the country.
He’ll be happy to offer a glowing reference and even speak to his contacts to help you find a position that’s right for you. ”
My eyes narrowed. This was a lot. They were going to let me go early but pay me until the end of my contract regardless. It would mean I could graduate with no financial worries while I looked for a permanent job.
There had to be a catch.
“Are you trying to pay me off?” I asked.
“No,” she denied. “It’s not a payoff; it’s an apology.
We’ll honor the offer whether you pursue a complaint or not.
Richard understands his behavior was unacceptable, and he’s making moves to correct it.
What happened yesterday won’t happen again”—she lowered her tone and dipped her chin to look me dead in the eye— “to anyone.”
My boss shuffled uncomfortably in his seat.
“I’d like you to take the rest of the week off,” Louise suggested.
“It will take a couple of days for Richard to complete the handover, and after what happened last night, I’d like you to get some space.
Come in on Monday with a clear head. I’ll pencil you into a meeting at 9.
30 with me and Leah in her office, and we can discuss your future plans. ”
I nodded, standing and smoothing my jacket awkwardly. “Thank you.” I looked at Richard, who kept his gaze locked on the door behind me, his usual overconfidence nowhere to be seen. “I’ll see you Monday.” I turned and headed for the door and out to the lobby.
My steps faltered when I spotted Kerry leaning against a wall, waiting for me.
She looked past me into the conference room. “Are you okay?”
“Surprisingly, yes.” I tucked my hair behind my ear. “Louise from HR called me up. Leah’s taking over from Richard. He’s stepping back from the business.”
“Oh my God,” she breathed, her eyes rounding.
“I have two weeks left here. They’re signing off my banked hours and paying me until the end of my contract. I’m also getting a bonus.”
“Pay-off money,” she stated.
“That was my first thought, but I think Louise wants me away from Richard for my own safety. She told me that she’s happy for me to make a formal complaint and swears it won’t affect my offer.”
“To be fair, Louise has always been straightforward,” Kerry mused. “She plays things by the book, and I’m sure she’d have been pissed to find out what that asshole did to you.” Her eyebrows pulled together. “How did she find out? I doubt Richard would have fessed up.”
I’d wondered the same thing myself and suspected Pagan had something to do with it. I could hardly tell Kerry that, though, so I just shrugged and murmured, “I have no idea.”
“You must have a guardian angel,” she commented.
I couldn’t stop my mouth from hitching because little did she know that my guardian angel was big, bald, ripped, and looked like he cleaned his teeth with a machete.
Still, Pagan was the only one who’d gone out of his way to help me.
He’d given me more help in one day than any of the so-called civilized, suited-up gentlemen from my office had done in weeks.
I’d written him off at the party. I didn’t like men who played games; it was immature and very beta, and beta men didn’t do it for me. Then he reappeared and laid everything out, all while showing me how ruthless he could be, and I liked it.
Pagan reminded me a lot of my da: more anti-hero than knight in shining armor. He ran so deep that I knew it would take me a lifetime to work him out, but if I were honest with myself, that was the attraction.
Most girls wanted easy and safe. They wanted good men who loved and cherished them and gave them a home and babies, but I’d always secretly craved for something more, something soul-changing, dangerous, even obsessive. I craved a love that would leave me breathless, ragged, and raw.
I wanted excitement and danger, the kind that left my head spinning and my emotions upside down.
I’d risk being torn apart and shredded to the bone just to feel something real instead of my life being sanitized and safe.
I yearned for a man who wouldn’t just hurt anyone who crossed me but would grind them to dust beneath his motorcycle boot while I watched.
I wanted a man who would grab me by the throat, drag me to a cliff edge, and then dare me to jump with him.
I wanted Pagan Sinclair.
—————
Kerry and Jada invited me out for drinks, but I was so convinced he’d call that I told them I was too tired and wanted to start my new job search.
Never in my life had I waited around for a man; I’d never cared enough to, but I found myself constantly checking my cell phone for a sign.
It was good in a way because it kept my mind off work and the impending changes that I couldn’t control.
My mind was so fixed on Pagan that suddenly work somehow seemed unimportant.
I should have been looking through industry magazines and checking out all my contacts on LinkedIn to find a new job, but I couldn’t concentrate.
Instead, I had a shower, lotioned and spritzed my body to within an inch of its life, and did my hair again, just in case he called and said he was on his way.
But he didn’t.
In fact, he didn’t contact me at all; he didn’t even message to check in and make sure I was okay.
I sipped my wine and stared at the TV, not that I watched it. Instead, my mind whirred on a loop while I second-guessed myself and everything he’d said to me the night before.
By nine o’clock, I’d had enough. My stomach swirled with nerves from winding myself up, along with burning disappointment because Pagan didn’t seem bothered about me. He knew my day had probably been hellish, but still, all I got from him was radio silence.
Screw this.
Getting up from the couch, I stabbed at my cell and clicked it onto the loudspeaker while heading for my bedroom.
By the time Kerry eventually answered, I was already standing inside my tiny closet, studying my choices.
The call connected, and my friend's voice shouted over the blaring music of the bar, “Wait a sec, Ash.” She must have gone outside or to the bathroom because the noise faded, and she came back on the line. “That’s better, I can hear you now. You okay?”
“I’m coming out,” I declared, grabbing my folded, tight, black leather pants from a shelf. “Where are you?”
“The Mercury,” she told me. “There’s a decent crowd in tonight. Remember that fireman I got talking to a few weeks ago at Hi-Dive? Well, he just walked in with a few friends.”
I grabbed a tight-fitting, black crop top and then headed toward my dresser for clean underwear. It wouldn’t take me long to get dressed and slap on some makeup, and the Uber would take about ten minutes.
“I’ll be there in thirty,” I stated.
“Awesome. I’ll save you a seat,” she replied excitedly before the line went dead, and I made for the bathroom to brush my teeth, already feeling better about my night.
As I squeezed toothpaste onto the brush, I told myself it didn’t matter that Pagan hadn’t called.
I could put him in the back of my mind and not give him a second thought while I did my own thing.
At least that was what I told myself, anyway.
—————
Twenty-six minutes later, I walked into the Mercury Café and headed straight for the bar where my friends were shooting the shit with a small group of guys wearing Denver Fire Department tees.
Jada, who was wedged between two burly men, saw me first, her face alight with mischief as she waved a hand and called out, “Over here, you baddie.”
Half the bar glanced around, including the guys my friends were with. A plethora of interested grins and appreciative glances were sent my way, and I added some pep to my step, or as my friend Tristan would call it, some slut to my strut.
I wasn’t somebody who shied away from attention, especially since I had confidence in my looks and knew how to work my shit to my advantage. Though it had to be said, my leather pants, cropped tee, and four-inch heels no doubt helped.
The instant I approached the bar, one of the firemen leaned toward me, his gaze dropping to my chest. He had the decency to raise his eyes and flash me a sheepish grin before his stare raked over my face, and his smile widened to show me straight, white teeth.
“You must be Aislynn.” He held out his hand and took my fingers in his, giving them a gentle squeeze. “Kerry told us all about you.”
“All bad, I hope,” I drawled, giving him a half-smile while I took in his dancing blue eyes and attractive, messy blond hair that curled into his collar.
He seemed nice, a bit all-American boy next door for my tastes, but that glint in his eye made me wonder if there was more to him than brawny good looks and white teeth.
Jada cackled while Kerry let out a whoop, and the guys all laughed.
“Wanna drink?” Blond hottie asked.
I smiled. “I’d love a beer, please.”
He clutched his hand to his chest. “A girl after my own heart. Most girls who look the way you look drink cocktails.”
I let out a small laugh. “I do drink cocktails, but my tipple of choice is a beer and whiskey chaser.”
He looked up and whisper-shouted, “Thank you, God,” before tipping his face back down to mine and demanding, “Marry me.”
I brought a scandalized hand to my chest. “But, kind sir, I don’t even know your name.”
He chuckled. “Kieran Walsh.”
My mouth curved into an involuntary smile. “Well, that’s a good Irish name if I ever heard one, Kieran Walsh.”
“My grandparents came over from Dublin in the sixties,” he confirmed.
“Gramps was a mechanic, and Grandma was an elementary school teacher. My dad was born here, but he’s still a proud Irishman, and passionate about instilling that same Irish pride into me and my sister, which he tries on the daily. ”
I gave him big eyes. “Sounds like my mammy. She moved over from Roscommon when she married my da. There’s nobody more Irish than Maureen O’Shea.”
“What about your dad?” he asked.
My heart jerked.
It was weird how out of nowhere I’d remember that my daddy had passed and feel his loss like a punch to the gut again. Some days, I wondered if the pain of remembering would ever pass or if it would always be as raw as the day he died.
My eyebrows furrowed. “He passed a few months ago.”
Kieran dipped his chin. “I’m sorry.”
My mouth quirked tightly, and I took in the kindness behind his eyes, and it struck me how it was such a stark contrast to the storm that raged in Pagan’s dark stare.
For a fleeting moment, I liked the comfort Kieran offered because it warmed me, and these days, I didn’t often feel warm. I felt as if I were made of ice.
Maybe that was why I was so fascinated by Pagan. I’d been cold for so long, but he radiated fire and thawed out all the parts of me that froze the day my da died. I thought I’d be at least partway over it by now; it had been months, but I felt suspended in time.
When Da was alive, I loved life and lived it to the full, but now I just felt lost.
Maybe if I pursued someone like Kieran, who was safe, I’d eventually come out of my fog of grief and also stop obsessing about Pagan Sinclair.
But then, maybe not.
“Are you okay?” Kieran asked, his voice gentle. “Did I bring up bad memories?”
I forced a smile and shook my head. “No. Not at all. I just miss my da sometimes. It hasn’t been long since he died, and I’m still trying to find my new normal.”
He knocked his shoulder into mine, which was oddly comforting. “Well, if you need a distraction...” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
I couldn’t stop a sudden bubble of laughter escaping, and without a thought, I rolled up on my toes, planted my hands on Kieran’s broad shoulders, and kissed his cheek, whispering, “Thank you.”
That was the moment the atmosphere in the bar changed.
It felt tangible, like somebody had sucked all the heat out of the room, leaving the air frigid. The buzz of chatter and soft laughter died down as Kieran’s eyes fell on something over my shoulder and froze, all color fading from his face.
“Aislynn,” he began quietly. “Why is there a big, bald, angry-looking motherfucker heading toward us looking like he’s about to rip my head off?”
My heart leaped into my throat, and slowly, I craned my neck. My body locked when I caught sight of Pagan making his way through the crowd, shouldering people out of the way in his haste to get to me.
Pagan’s gait was pure threat. His shoulders were bunched angrily, and his black stare was fixed on me with laser-sharp focus. His eyes dropped to where Kieran had a hold of my waist, then sliced back up to meet mine while his lip curled into a snarl.
Kieran dropped his hand, and I tore my gaze away from Pagan to glower at him.
Pussy.
Pagan jerked his chin toward the door, his stare holding mine, and he barked one word at me.
“Out.”
A bad feeling slid through my chest, and suddenly, I struggled to breathe.
Oh shit.