Chapter 20 #2
I laughed, genuinely delighted by this tiny crack in his perfect Bureau facade. On impulse, I gestured to the Emotion Mirrors. "Your turn."
"Excuse me?"
"Touch one of the flowers," I challenged. "Let's see what colors you get."
Fenric stiffened, his momentary openness vanishing. "That would be highly inappropriate and entirely unnecessary."
"Why? Afraid of what it might show?" I raised an eyebrow. "Come on, I showed you mine. It's only fair."
"Bureau agents are not required to participate in emotional reflection exercises with their charges," his tone was stiff and stuffy again.
"This isn't about Bureau requirements," I crossed my arms. "This is about two people sharing an experience. Or are you too scared?"
His eye twitched at the accusation. "I am not scared. I simply prefer to maintain appropriate professional boundaries."
"One touch," I narrowed my eyes. "Five seconds of your perfectly scheduled day. Consider it part of my emotional regulation therapy, it would make me happy to see you participate."
Fenric looked like he was undergoing some intense internal struggle. Finally, with a sigh that suggested he was agreeing to torture rather than touching a flower, he set his tablet down on a nearby bench and approached the bed of Emotion Mirrors.
"Five seconds," he glared at me. "And this will not be included in the official report."
"Deal," I agreed, hiding my smile.
With obvious reluctance, Fenric reached out and briefly touched one of the crystal flowers with a single finger.
The effect was immediate and, frankly, stunning.
The flower filled with a rigid geometric pattern of deep blue and silver, exactly what I would have expected from him, but then, to my astonishment, threads of fiery red and warm pink appeared, weaving through the orderly pattern like rebellious streaks.
Fenric snatched his hand back as if burned, but not before I saw the colors clearly.
"Well, well, well," I couldn't keep the triumph from my voice. "Looks like there's more to you than regulations and protocols after all."
His ears had turned bright pink again. "The flowers are obviously miscalibrated."
"The flowers don't lie," I countered. "What does red mean in this context?"
"It's irrelevant," he picked up his tablet, clutching it like a shield.
"The red represents passion," came a melodic voice from behind us. "Deeply buried, perhaps, but very much alive."
We both turned to find an elderly dryad tending to a nearby plant bed. Her skin was the color of birch bark, with delicate green leaves growing along her arms instead of hair. She smiled knowingly at Fenric, whose blush had now spread to his cheeks.
"The flowers are perfectly calibrated," her voice was like rustling leaves. "They simply show what is, not what we wish others to see."
Fenric looked like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole. "We should proceed to the next area," he was already turning to leave.
I thanked the dryad and hurried after him, unable to keep the grin off my face. "So, passion, huh? What are you passionate about, Fenric? Color-coding? Alphabetizing? The perfect crease in dress pants?"
"This line of inquiry is inappropriate," he began to walk faster.
"Oh come on," I caught up to him, ignoring the twinge of pain in my knee. "You saw my emotional state. It's only fair I get to ask about yours."
He stopped abruptly, turning to face me with an expression I couldn't quite read. "What do you want me to say, Winter? That beneath the protocols and regulations, I'm actually a chaotic mess of feelings and desires? That I maintain rigid control because the alternative terrifies me?"
I blinked, taken aback by his sudden intensity. "I... I was just teasing."
"Of course you were," he sighed, running a hand through his silver-blond hair, the first time I'd ever seen him disrupt its perfect arrangement.
"You humans always think emotion is something to celebrate, to indulge in.
You have no idea what it's like when that emotion can literally tear reality apart. "
This sudden vulnerability caught me completely off guard. "What do you mean?"
He seemed to debate with himself before answering. "I'm not fully elven," he finally admitted, his voice so low I had to lean in to hear him. "My father was a Seer."
"A Seer? Like, someone who can see the future?"
"Not just see it," Fenric's expression darkened. "Shape it. Seers don't simply observe possible futures; they can influence which paths become reality. It's a rare and dangerous gift, one that drove my father to madness."
I was stunned by this revelation. "I had no idea."
"Few do. The Bureau is aware, of course, they monitor all part-Seers carefully, but it's not information I volunteer.
" He straightened his already-perfect tie, a nervous gesture I was beginning to recognize.
"My father's emotional outbursts caused temporal fractures that destroyed our family home and nearly killed my mother.
I learned very early that control wasn't just desirable, it was necessary for survival. "
The pieces suddenly clicked into place, his obsession with rules, his fear of chaos, his constant need to predict and manage every variable. It wasn't just bureaucratic fastidiousness; it was self-preservation.
"That's why you're so adamant about schedules and protocols," I realized. "You're afraid of what happens when things get unpredictable."
"Not afraid," he corrected automatically, then paused. "Well, perhaps cautious would be more accurate. I've seen what happens when powerful beings lose control. The damage they can cause."
I thought about my own recent experiences, nearly tearing reality apart at the farmers market, creating a pocket dimension with Horrace. For the first time, I felt a genuine connection to Fenric's perspective.
"I get that," I looked down briefly. "I really do. But there has to be a middle ground between rigid control and complete chaos."
He gave me a considering look. "Perhaps. But finding that balance is challenging."
We resumed walking, but the atmosphere between us had shifted. The awkward tension had been replaced by something more thoughtful, almost companionable. Fenric had put away his tablet, and though I was sure he was mentally tracking our schedule, he wasn't actively consulting it anymore.
Our path led us to a small pond where the water was so clear it seemed almost invisible, revealing colorful stones and tiny magical fish that glowed like living jewels. Stone benches surrounded the water, and without discussion, we both sat down on one facing the pond.
"So," I broke the comfortable silence after a few minutes. "A Seer, huh? Did you inherit any of those abilities?"
Fenric stared out at the water. "Some. Not the full manifestation, thankfully, but enough that I occasionally get glimpses. Possibilities rather than certainties."
"Have you seen anything about me? About the prophecy?" I couldn't help asking.
His expression closed off slightly. "Seeing is not the same as understanding. The future is fluid. Especially around you."
"That's not really an answer."
"It's the only one I can give," his tone had lost its usual bureaucratic crispness. "The more I try to see your path clearly, the more it shifts and changes."
We fell silent again, watching the magical fish dart between the stones. The sun had begun its descent, casting long shadows across the garden and giving the water a golden glow. It was peaceful in a way I hadn't experienced since this whole prophecy business began.
"Can I ask you something personal?" I ventured after a while.
Fenric looked wary but nodded. "You may ask. I reserve the right not to answer."
"Fair enough," I shifted to face him more directly. "Why did you join the Bureau? If you're part-Seer, wouldn't that make you more suited to the prophecy division than magical compliance?"
He considered the question longer than I expected.
"The Prophecy Division deals with possibilities, with what might be.
Compliance deals with what is, with maintaining order in the present.
I find comfort in that concreteness." He paused, then added softly, "And perhaps I thought that by enforcing the rules, I could protect others from the kind of chaos my father caused. "
The admission felt significant, a piece of himself he rarely shared. I found myself seeing Fenric in a new light, not just as the annoying bureaucrat who followed me around with a tablet, but as someone who had his own wounds, his own reasons for being the way he was.
"Thank you for telling me that," I took a chance and squeezed his hand.
He looked slightly uncomfortable with my gratitude but nodded acknowledgment. "Your turn. Why did you become a librarian?"
I smiled, surprised by his interest. "I love books.
Always have. There's something magical about them, even the non-magical ones.
Each one is a little world you can visit whenever you want.
" I traced patterns in the stone bench with my finger.
"And I like helping people find exactly what they need, especially when they're not sure what that is themselves. "