Chapter 11
On Monday morning, Q left for work, leaving her alone. She stood in the kitchen, looking for anything to clean or take care of, but Q’s house was clean, and there wasn’t anything for her to do.
He’d showed her how to wash clothes, so there wasn’t even any washing to take care of.
She turned around, searching for something to do, when there was a knock at the door.
At first, she froze, but then she raced over and was about to pull open the door when she remembered to check the peephole.
It was Ellis. She pulled the door open, happy to see the woman.
“Hello, Ellis.”
Ellis flashed a huge smile. “Flora, I hope you’re having a good morning. I figured you’d be up, too.”
“Come in.”
“Thank you. I brought the phone, and we’ll practice using it. I wanted to make sure you have enough clothes, so I brought some over.” Ellis held up a bag for her.
“Oh, I couldn’t take your clothes.”
“They aren’t mine. I went to a thrift store and picked some up. I swear I didn’t spend much money. If they fit, you can have them; if not, I’ll donate them to a local shelter.”
A shiver slid through her. “A shelter. Q tried to take me to one.”
“I heard. He said it was awful. I’m sorry that was one of your first experiences in the city. You deserve better.”
She shook her head. “I don’t know about that.”
“I do. You deserve good things. You’re a good person.”
“I ran away from my community and the man my father picked for me to marry. If they find me, they’ll punish me.”
Ellis started making coffee and met her gaze after she started the coffee maker. “They were wrong. You shouldn’t be punished. You are a good person.”
She lifted one shoulder, a response she’d seen all the women make.
In the community, she would have been beaten if she’d done that.
She had been hit the one time she’d made that movement in front of her father.
She’d learned not to shrug, but she didn’t think Ellis would be mad at her reaction.
Q hadn’t seemed to care if she shrugged, which was so weird to her.
She wondered what, if anything, would make Q hit her.
“My thoughts on what makes a person good are messed up. I don’t know what good is versus bad. I spent my life thinking I was a terrible person, and then I left and met Q and the rest of you, and now I don’t know anything.”
Ellis reached out and squeezed her hand. “Well, I’ve met plenty of people who aren’t good, and I can say without fail that you are a good person.”
“I hope I can be. I don’t know how to live here.”
“Well, we’re here to help. For now, let’s work on your phone skills. I’ll enter our information, and you can call or text.”
“Text?”
“I’ll explain that. Don’t worry. We’ll work on it together, and everything will be okay.”
Flora grabbed water instead of coffee while they worked on phone skills and texting.
She actually talked to Vera on the phone, which was weird.
Then she texted with Clove and sent a text to Remi.
They were all happy to find out that she was able to communicate with them.
It felt amazing to pick up this skill. Maybe living in this world wouldn’t be too bad.
She sent a text to Q and her phone rang almost immediately. She jumped with shock but laughed as she answered.
“Hello?”
“It’s Q. I’m glad you have a phone. I’m on lunch, so I can talk. Is Ellis still there?”
“Yes. Do you need to talk to her?”
“No, just wanted to make sure you weren’t alone.”
“Thank you for having them come over to help me. I know I wouldn’t have been able to do this without their help.”
“I’m glad you have help. I’ll be home around three-thirty.”
“Oh, okay. Do I need to have food ready?”
“No, we can cook together tonight.”
“That sounds good. I can’t wait for you to get home.”
“Goodbye, Flora. I’ll see you later.”
“Goodbye.”
She ended the call feeling like she accomplished something great. Ellis’s smile was contagious, and her lips spread into a wide grin, making her cheeks hurt.
“Oh my, I think I’ve smiled more today than I ever have in my life. I can’t believe you all are being so nice.”
Ellis pulled her into a quick hug. “I like helping. And you’re very nice. I’m going to take off. Call or text if you need anything.”
“I will. And thank you.”
Alone, she stared at the phone, wondering what else she could do. Even with plates they’d used for the snack and the coffee mug Ellis had used, there wasn’t much to do. Maybe she should read.
She must have drifted off because she woke to the sound of keys in the door. She sat up, fear filling her. Napping wasn’t allowed, and she would surely get in trouble.
Q stepped in, looking happy until he caught her gaze, and then his smile fell. She was in trouble for napping. She shouldn’t have fallen asleep.
Q had heard back from Wolf and found out the contact information for The Refuge. He wasn’t sure Flora would need it, but he had the information now. Then he stepped in and saw the worry and fear in her eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
She shook her head almost violently and stepped back. “Nothing. I didn’t mean to fall asleep. I was just—”
He moved to her and held her shoulders. “Hey, there is nothing wrong with falling asleep. It’s okay.” Her panic didn’t quell. Instead, it looked like she was more upset.
“I was reading and drifted off. I didn’t—”
He pulled her into a hug and kissed the side of her head. “I’m not them. The rules you grew up with don’t apply here. It’s okay if you drift off.”
A shudder ripped through her, and he thought about stepping away, but then her head was against his neck, and her fingers twisted in the material of his shirt, pulling him closer.
Did she know anything about relationships? How twisted was the cult she’d grown up in? He wanted to help her, but his own emotions were on the edge and his body was responding to how close she was. He needed to stop this, or he would risk taking advantage of her.
He stepped back, fighting the urge to pull her closer and kiss her until they were both crazy with lust. She lowered her gaze, and he lifted her chin, not wanting to force her to look at him but wanting to make sure she was okay.
“Hey, you don’t live with them anymore. You’re free to do as you want.”
She shrugged and then bit her lower lip. “I don’t know what I want. I don’t know anything.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault. I felt better when Ellis was here, which is weird.”
“Weird how?”
She blew out a breath and turned away. Then, she took a few steps before turning back to him.
“We didn’t have friends. Well, we weren’t allowed to have friends.
Women were made to work. You know, the ‘idle hands make the devil’s work’ thing.
Since women are more sinful, we weren’t allowed to be idle.
I find it hard to just sit around. I need something. ”
“Okay.” He could see her point to some extent, but the rest of what she said was pure cult talk. She needed to have a way to clear all those rules from her mind. But he understood that not having anything to do all day would be weird.
When he got the odd day off, something he hadn’t planned, he usually worked out, did any cleaning or shopping that needed to be done, and only on rare occasions would he spend his free time watching TV.
She hadn’t grown up binge-watching TV shows.
She wouldn’t last if she didn’t have something to do.
He moved to the couch and sat, hoping she would join him. “We have a problem.”
“What?”
“I’m guessing that you have no documents.”
“Documents?”
“Birth certificate, government-issued identification, or a social security card. Do you have any of those?”
She shook her head. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about. All I know is we were told never to trust the government.”
“That means you can’t get a job. It’s going to take a while for that to be resolved. We can contact social services and figure out what your next step is.”
Her eyes grew wide, and she started shaking her head. “I don’t want them to take me away.”
“They won’t. But we need to start somewhere. I’ll set up an appointment, and we can start figuring out what to do.”
“Thank you. I feel like I’m causing you too many problems.”
“No, not at all. Don’t feel that way. You aren’t causing me any problems. It’s all good and will be good.
Don’t worry about any of this. We’ll figure it all out.
” He stood. “Now, how about we figure out what we’re eating for dinner.
I have some steaks that could go on the grill. Does that sound good?”
Flora nodded, still stuck on the point that she would have to contact the government and tell them about her.
It felt incredibly wrong, but she guessed it was the right move.
She couldn’t live in the past and had to move forward.
Moving on meant getting what she needed to live and work.
She just hoped she got to stay with Q. Living without him would break her heart.