20. Cassie
20
CASSIE
“ A nd that is everything?” the police officer asks me with a slight disbelieving look in her eyes. “All you can remember?”
“Y–Yes,” I stammer back. “Yes, I think so. I don’t know, it’s all been a bit of a blur. I can’t really remember. I mean, one minute I’m heading to a job interview, hoping that my life is going to get better, and the next minute, I’m in the middle of some fucking jungle being tied up and told that I’m going to be traded and used for some bullshit ransom plan, and then… then Benji rescued me, and you won’t even let me see him now. I don’t know how he’s doing. I think he’s under arrest!” I throw my hands in the air in frustration. “I need to know what’s going on with him. Will he be set free? Why aren’t you telling me anything?”
“As I’ve already said, Miss Jones,” she tells me in a cool but clearly angry tone of voice, “I can’t tell you about anyone else in this place. I have no information, and even if I did, it’s confidential at the moment. It’s under investigation.”
I gasp out angrily, frustration bubbling through me as again, she gives me nothing. I’m not one of the people under investigation here. I shouldn’t be treated like I’m a common criminal and neither should Benji. It’s utterly pissing me off that the police won’t give me anything I’m asking for. Especially after Benji did so much for me…
God, my heart skips about twenty beats when I think about Benji, about how much I want to be back with him. I haven’t told the cops anything about us because they don’t need to know about us, and I don’t want to be judged for being a little crazy either, but I really am head over heels in love with him. I can’t imagine a single day without him now. He’s my whole world.
“Okay, I’m going to give you this statement to read through, and I want you to sign it if you agree it’s correct to the best of your knowledge. After which time, we will make some decisions about what is going to happen next.”
Thankfully, the woman leaves me alone in the room to read through the statement that I just made, so I don’t see how I’m going to make any changes to it, but I at least relish the time to get my head around everything. I do what’s been commanded of me and run my eyes over the words, but I’m not really taking any of them in. It was bad enough to go through it another time with words. I don’t need to read about it as well. One time is more than enough. But if this is what gets me back to my hero, to the man that I’ve ensured the police know is my hero, then I’ll do whatever it takes. Whatever they want…
Oh, my God. I don’t intend to let any of the words sink in, but some of them do, and that unexpectedly brings emotions flooding to the surface. It has been a lot, more than I ever thought someone like me could suffer and survive, but here I am. I’m living, and that’s amazing. The tears flood down my face, and while some of them are sad, a lot of them are happy.
I’m also falling apart because I don’t know where I go from here. I don’t know what my life will be like. I’m afraid that I hurt my family with that phone call when I thought that I would die. I don’t know how I’ll react to them again or how they will take me in. I also don’t know if my dad will want me back on the TV show after all this drama, if there even is a TV show anymore. If I haven’t ruined it with that video. If the video even reached anyone. Benji’s boss was supposed to be stopping it, and the gang might not have had the time… God, I don’t even know what’s happened with that video and what effect it will have on my life.
I don’t want to be back on TV, I don’t want anyone noticing me, but I’m going to have very little control over this now. I don’t know if I’ll be allowed to do what I want again. The adult freedoms I’ve claimed for myself might be ripped away.
Urgh, that’s agonizing to think about. Imagining life back at home is so hard it hurts. Imagining life without Benji is even worse. I don’t know what he’s thinking, what his plans are for our future, but I can’t cope without him. Even long-distance will be too much for me because I like to know that he’s within touching distance… but his life isn’t in Puerto Rico, nor is his work. I don’t know if our short time together will be enough for him to give everything up. Even if I would for him, if he asked.
I sob a little harder with my head on the desk, a sense of hopelessness overcoming me, because although I might be free now, away from the gang and any ransom plot, the future is terrifying as well. The unknown.
“Miss, is everything okay?” A different police officer leans his head around the door to check in on me. I must be being watched and they think I’m making a silly scene in here. “Do you need anything? Water or anything like that?”
“Just a pen,” I sniff back. “So I can sign this. Everything is fine. I just need to… to confirm that this is right.”
I get the pen rapidly and scribble my signature across it. I want this done now, I want it over, I want to get out of here as quickly as I can. I’m done with this, I’m completely fed up with this whole place. I need to get out even if I don’t know where I’m going. No future, good or bad, is going to be sorted out while I’m in the police station, in limbo.
I don’t know how much time passes, but eventually someone comes into the room to let me know that I’m no longer needed. I do ask about Benji, but yet again, I get nothing back. If someone doesn’t let me know soon what’s going on, I’ll lose it. A lot of emotions are being bottled up inside me, and I don’t know how much longer I can keep pushing them down.
The waiting room is practically empty until I stubbornly take a seat to wait for him. Of course, it makes me anxious to do so, knowing that the gang members caught are probably in here as well, and if they’re not properly arrested, then they might well walk past me, giving them sight of me and potentially access to me as well, but this is for Benji and I’ll do anything for him.
“Miss, the door is this way,” the police officer tells me as she points me toward the exit. “You don’t need to stay here.”
“I’m waiting for Benji.” I fold my arms stubbornly over my chest. “You already know that I won’t go without him.”
There’s a funny look in her eyes which causes my stomach to flip-flop. They seriously better not have arrested him or I’ll lose my shit. They will unleash a demon in me that there’s no way they can be prepared for. I’m usually a calm person, but years of frustration and aggression might well come out if they push me. I might well become a fucking monster.
“Cassie.” Oh, my God, was that him? I jump around and find my eyes connecting with the one person I need to see, who I want to see more than anyone else in the world. “Oh, God, Cassie, you’re here. Are you okay? Are you hurt?”
I don’t know why he’s asking me this when he’s the one who seems far more beaten up than me. But of course, he always puts me first. I race across the room with tears flowing down my cheeks again, and I throw my arms around him. I kiss him again like there’s no tomorrow, I kiss him like we’ve been apart for months rather than hours because that’s kind of how I feel.
I don’t even think about how this might look in front of the police. I really don’t give a shit. I just want him.
“Oh, my God, I didn’t think I was going to see you again,” I gasp as we pull apart for just a second. “Are you okay?”
“I am.” He smiles softly as he tucks a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “Let’s get out of here. We need to gather our stuff out of the motel. I don’t know what’s left because it’s a crime scene, but we have to gather up what we can.”
I nod silently since I don’t care where we go as long as we’re together, and I willingly head outside the police station. It isn’t until we’re out in the parking lot that Benji turns to me to talk to me a little more, to fill me in.
His face is serious, which makes my spine bolt up higher. This had better not be one of those twists where everything seems amazing just for it to rapidly slide downhill once more. I don’t know if I can handle that once more.
“Max was helping us the entire time,” Benji informs me. “He was the one who got the cops to us. I’ve spoken to him now and let him know that we’re alive. He’s going to let your family know, which I’m sure will be a massive weight off your shoulders.” I nod emphatically. I need them to know that after everything, I’ve made it out. “And he’s been working with the police to ensure that they know everything, which is why I got out faster than I would have done otherwise.”
“Thank goodness.” I chuckle. “I was starting to get very worried that you were going to end up locked up for saving me.”
“But it isn’t all good news,” he informs me, a little sheepishly, if I’m honest. “Although there isn’t a ransom threat any longer because you’re safe and the gang members are going to be locked away, the video was still sent out.”
I gasp as it hits me. There’s no escape from all of this, even if I’m out. “Has it been on TV already? Has it been seen?”
“I think so,” Benji admits. I can see how much he hates saying this because he knows how much it’s going to crush me. “Max attempted to get it all under control, but it was too much of a news story, you know, because of who your father is…”
I bob my head up and down, nodding as if I understand what’s going on, but honestly, I’m in a tailspin. If the video did make it out into the world, then things really will change for me in the worst way possible. I’m not going to be able to find happiness and privacy again. Everything is going to be whipped away from me and I’ll be left floating.
“It’s okay,” Benji declares to me as I bend forward and gasp for air with a need to fill my lungs once more. “It’s okay, don’t worry. We will find a way to get through it. We will find a way to get through everything, I promise you that much.”
But there might not be a ‘we’ anymore. Our lives might well be heading in different directions, and then I’ll be alone. Can I deal with this alone? I really don’t know…