Chapter 49 - Hayden
HAYDEN
The room was warm to begin with, but even warmer after we were done. It also reeked of sex. Long sex. Dirty sex. The kind of sex women gave their men after returning from six months on some oil derrick in the middle of the ocean, much less after not having seen them for a measly week.
But a week felt like an eternity, being away from them.
Carter had gotten home well after midnight, to find me naked in his bed and waiting patiently for him.
We’d taken full advantage of the solitude, and over the course of our hot little reunion we’d fucked ourselves basically senseless.
Even now, sprawled half-delirious across the chaos of pillows and blankets, we couldn’t stop touching each other.
Lying on my side, with Carter spooning me from behind, I couldn’t help but trace my finger lightly down his long, jagged, scar.
“Sawyer told me about this,” I murmured, into the silence. “Hope that’s okay.”
Carter didn’t flinch, or pull away. He only planted his lips against my cheek; and kissed me.
“It’s more than okay,” he whispered. “I’m glad you know.”
My eyes closed dreamily, as I pulled that arm even tighter around my waist. I’d never felt closer to them than I did right now. And not just Carter, but all of them.
“I still haven’t figured him out though,” I murmured sleepily.
“Who?”
“Sawyer.”
Carter chuckled deeply, rocking us both. “What’s there to figure out?”
“I mean, for starters what does he do?” I prodded. “Other than work the bar with you. You say he’s a partner, but he claims you own it. That your great-uncle left it to you.”
“Grand uncle.”
“Okay, fine. And I know you were childhood friends…”
“Sawyer was always a brother to me,” Carter went on. “Everywhere I’ve gone, he’s always been there. Can’t say the same for the other way, of course. Sawyer’s visited almost thirty countries. He’s been all over the world.”
I blinked in shock. So much, that I twisted to face him.
“He has?”
“Yes.”
I squinted. “Military?”
“Sort of,” Carter nodded against the pillow we shared. Our faces were close, our voices low. Beneath the tumble of scattered blankets, our naked limbs snaked naturally around each other. Like we’d been sleeping together our whole lives.
“Sawyer’s an ex-travel photographer,” Carter explained. “Civilian, but with military contracts. He’s been to some very dangerous places. A dozen different combat zones, from what I can figure.” His hand traced upward from my hip, all the way to the side of my face. “Does that surprise you?”
I thought about it. “A little,” I admitted. “But also, not really.”
“Yeah,” laughed Carter. “Nothing surprises me about Sawyer anymore. He’s never been able to sit still; not in school, not at home, not anywhere we ever went.
Helping me with The Refuge for these past few years is about the closest he’s come to settling down.
But I love him for it. He’d do anything to help me, even if it means quelling his ADHD. ”
The hand against the side of my face felt warm and strong. As his fingers traced lightly behind my ear, it gave me goosebumps.
“Sawyer’s fearlessness and his need to keep moving was perfect for the job he had,” Carter continued.
“He also saw some very serious shit. His last assignment went sideways, though. Something in Morocco.” Carter’s handsome mouth went abruptly tight.
“Whatever it was, it ended badly. When he first came home he used to talk about it, but not anymore.”
I lay there in rapt fascination, hanging on his every word. It made me realize there were so many things I still didn’t know about these men. So many secrets I could eventually unlock, with enough patience and love.
“Anyway, I know it weighed on him because he actually went home for a little while,” Carter finished. “And Sawyer never goes home.”
“Why?”
“He needed to recharge, I guess. He had to—”
“No, I mean why doesn’t he ever go home?” I asked. “I know he loves his mother very much. He talks about her all the time.”
“He does.”
“Was his father… bad to him?”
Carter’s expression was unwavering. He shook his head.
“His father didn’t bother with him at all, and that was worse I think,” said Carter. “His old man’s love is conditional. Always was.”
“Conditional upon what?”
“Tradition, for one. Legacy. Doing the ‘right’ thing, at the ‘right’ time. According to his dad, that is.”
I still wasn’t getting it. Carter, realizing my plight, let out a long sigh.
“Sawyer was born into a very powerful family,” he said. “But he rejected his wealth. He took off at the age of seventeen, and never looked back.
I couldn’t believe it. “Sawyer has money?”
“No. His father has money,” Carter corrected me. “Old money. When his son rejected him, he cut him off from his inheritance, which Sawyer was more than fine with. He never wanted it to begin with, and since then, he’s never looked back.”
“Never?”
“Practically, yes. He hasn’t seen either of his brothers since the split, but that was more on them than him. They were too afraid of losing favor. They took their father’s side.”
“You mean they took the money’s side.”
“Exactly.”
My stomach rolled a little. “That’s shitty.”
“It is,” Carter agreed. “But Sawyer’s mother has always been amazing. She still loves him, and he loves her back. He even visits her at the house sometimes, when his father isn’t there.”
I took it all in, digesting everything. The scenario didn’t make sense to me; maybe because my parents had loved me so much, growing up.
We’d drifted quickly once they moved away, to create an all-new life with friends in Florida.
But I couldn’t imagine having to sneak past my father, just to see my mom.
“He brings her things when he goes,” Carter added. “Little trinkets, from all the places he’s visited.” He let out a laugh. “A little corny, I know, but—”
“It’s not corny!” I countered. “That’s the sweetest thing I ever heard.”
Carter’s smile was as warm as his sleepy brown eyes. Each time he blinked them, it got slower and slower.
“Long day?” I chuckled.
He nodded, so I swept my arms around him. I brought him in, all the way close, until his stubbled face rested between my warm, naked breasts. I wanted to squeeze him into my body. To wrap my legs just so tightly around him, we’d melt together.
Within the minute, we were both fast asleep.