Chapter 1
Nico
I ran my fingers through my hair in an attempt to tame the wild curls that had a mind of their own. After getting it cut shorter, I’d thought I’d finally be able to get a grasp on it. No such luck. I guessed it didn’t matter. It wasn’t like it would stay neat after I shifted anyway.
Which was fine. If everything went according to plan, he wouldn’t be looking at my hair anyway. I swallowed, my throat dry. If it doesn’t . . .
I might have arranged this date meticulously, down to the very second, but there were so many working pieces, it had a huge chance of failing miserably.
My phone buzzed, which was a welcome interruption. I smiled at the text from the alpha I was meeting.
M: Are we still on for tonight?
Such a simple text, but immediately it sent me spiraling, my thoughts conflicting and confusing.
On one hand, I was so ready. After months and months of begging and arguing with my brother to allow me out of the manor without a bodyguard shadowing my every move, I’d given up on that approach and taken matters into my own hands.
Maybe it was shitty of me to go behind my brother’s back, who was only trying to protect me, but I was a nineteen-year-old omega who hadn’t had my first heat. I had needs.
Needs my brother hypocritically kept ignoring when I knew for a fact he had no problem satisfying his. I refused to lose my virginity during my heat. I wanted to be fully present my first time, not so lost that I didn’t get to enjoy it.
Which brought me to this moment. I grabbed my phone and walked away from the full-length brass mirror mounted on my wall to collapse on my bed.
I stared at the message. All I had to do was type yes.
I was ready. It was now or never. Things would never line up like this again, so if I didn’t make my move, I’d never have another chance.
Plus, I’d already bailed on M twice, so I doubted he’d be understanding a third time.
“Fuck it,” I muttered to myself before typing up a response.
Me: Yes ;) I’ll be there at 10 pm.
I threw my phone down as soon as I hit send. My stomach twisted and I pressed the heel of my palm into it, hoping to soothe the nerves and guilt.
Was losing my virginity really worth betraying my brother’s trust and putting myself at risk?
I loved Santino. I really did. He didn’t hold it against me that I’d been born out of an affair when our father had cheated on his mother.
He never made me feel like I was less than or wasn’t worthy of having the Diangi last name.
Even when I’d presented as an omega, the first from the Diangi line in generations, he hadn’t turned his back on me.
No, Santino Diangi had doubled down and his protectiveness had increased to an absurd level.
Along with his best friend, Emilio, he had made damn sure that I wouldn’t be looked down upon or considered weak.
I might be small, but that didn’t mean shit when I had a blade in my hand.
Even if I didn’t, they’d trained me intensely, until I could take down men twice my size.
But lately, that overprotectiveness was stifling.
I couldn’t even leave the manor without a fucking guard who answered to Santino directly.
Yes, he had guards too—it was kind of a necessity when you ruled the most powerful crime family in Canyon Brook—but they listened to him and he was in the public eye.
I might have been family, but very few people knew who I was.
Santino had made sure of that. Besides our amber eyes, we didn’t look much alike, thanks to my mother and my omega genetics.
That gave me a little anonymity. I just wanted to breathe, to live without his overbearing presence.
I was a Diangi, damn it. I was part of the ruling family of the White Wolves. I didn’t need my brother and his best friend hovering over me like I was a helpless child.
Thinking too much about Lio brought up different feelings that were not helpful.
He always looked out for me, but in a different way than my brother.
I’d idolized him and wanted to be just like him, and if I was being honest, I’d even had a bit of a crush on him.
But over the last year or so, my feelings had shifted to something more.
They were less innocent, if the dirty dreams that woke me up panting and needy were any indication.
I wanted him, but it was such a ridiculous pipe dream, I’d learned to shut it down.
I was sure I was imagining the way Lio had been staring at me lately.
He thought of me as a little kid. Besides, he was Santino’s second, and my brother would likely kill him if he ever tried to touch me.
So yeah, Emilio was out. And I was left to suffer through my .
. . frustrations on my own. That was how I’d ended up on the shifter dating app and matched up with M.
I jumped off my bed, determined. If I didn’t leave soon, I’d miss my window. Both Santino and Emilio were on the other side of the city, handling business. The guard left to watch me, Carter, was an easy mark. I could do this.
Steeling myself, I opened my bedroom door, and sure enough, Carter was leaning against the wall, scrolling through his phone.
He looked up at me. “Hey, little man. Need anything?”
I resisted the eye roll. Carter had been around for ages.
He’d been one of my father’s enforcers, and when Santino had taken over after he’d died, he’d given him a job in the manor out of loyalty.
But that meant Carter had known me since I’d been dropped off on Tommaso Diangi’s doorstep.
He was like an uncle to me, which made me feel even more guilty about betraying him, but I pushed it aside.
There was no place for guilt as a Diangi. We got shit done, no matter what.
“I’m just going to go for a run.”
Carter frowned. “It’s kind of late, kiddo. Maybe you should wait till tomorrow?”
I knew he’d say that, so I fixed him with my biggest puppy-dog pout, one he’d never been able to resist. “Carter,” I whined, which, maybe, was why he insisted on seeing me as a kid, but whatever. “I’ve been cooped up for days. Please? I’ll stay on the property.”
Carter’s lips pursed as he considered it. “Maybe I should call one of the other guys to run with you? Gianni’s on duty.”
My stomach churned again. Fuck, I was such an asshole.
Santino was going to kill me. An injury while trying to protect my father had left Carter unable to shift properly.
It had been years since he’d been in his full wolf form.
It was another reason the plan would work, since there was no way he could follow me.
Unless he really did call Gianni. That fucker was fast. It would be impossible for me to lose him.
“Really, it’s okay. I swear I won’t even go near the fence.” Lies. “I’m crawling out of my skin here.”
Carter’s eyes softened. He was going to give in.
“Don’t go past the pond.”
I grinned. “Thank you, Carter!”
He waved me off. “Yeah, yeah. Your brother is going to murder me, but you know I can’t deny you anything.”
Fuck, I was really going to hurt Carter if he ever found out the truth. I already hated that I was betraying Santino’s trust, but Carter was just doing his job. He didn’t deserve this.
I smiled at him. “You know I won’t let you get in trouble. If Santino’s pissed, I’ll take the blame. I swear.” That, at least, was the truth. This was on me, not Carter, and I had a feeling that even as ruthless as my brother could be, he’d never hurt him.
Carter sighed. “Alright, go before I change my mind.”
I grinned at him. “I’ll be back soon.” I didn’t wait. I stripped right then and there and shifted.
Every Diangi, for generations, shifted into a pure white wolf, and I’d honestly been more than a little relieved when I’d presented as one.
There had been enough whispers my whole life about the authenticity of my mother’s claim that I’d had my own concerns about my lineage.
We’d all breathed a little easier after that day.
I might not have been an alpha or legitimate, but my wolf was as pure as the rest of them and had solidified my place when some had doubts.
The white wolf had become a symbol for our ancestors, and as wars had been waged and society had changed, the Diangis had come out on top.
When the governments had toppled and crime families had taken their places, the Diangis had been there, proving they were the strongest and most powerful.
The title of Patri had been passed down from alpha male to alpha male for as long as our history had been recorded, and Santino was just the latest in a long line of powerful Diangi alphas.
I heard Carter grumble about shifting indoors and leaving my clothes everywhere, but I was already more than halfway down the hallway.
Father had insisted on no indoor shifting, but Santino didn’t mind.
Emilio spent more time in his wolf form than human, so any rules that stifled him had been changed almost immediately when my brother had taken over.
I passed some of Santino’s guys as I padded down the hallway and toward the back of the manor.
They all glanced at me out of the corners of their eyes, but none made a move to stop me.
They wouldn’t. There were only a handful that had the right to do that, and two of them weren’t here and another was the one who’d given me permission to go.
I kept a somewhat casual pace, not wanting to look like I was doing anything but going for a late-night run.
Santino had gotten automatic doors installed that led to the acres of land that were also part of our estate, that way we weren’t stuck behind a closed door when in our four-legged forms. Father had likely been rolling in his grave when he’d done it.
He’d had very strong feelings about our animal forms. He’d thought of his wolf as something he’d had to deal with, a weapon he’d learned to hone but only use when absolutely necessary.
Only his enforcers had had permission to shift whenever they wanted, but the rest of us only could once a month, unless told otherwise.
Father had barely been in the grave before Santino had changed that. Unlike Father, he encouraged the family to embrace both sides. Everyone seemed more relaxed now that we weren’t constantly fighting our instincts.
I finally reached the sliding doors and tilted my head in greeting at the two guards standing near them.
“Good evening, Mr. Diangi,” the one guard, Salvatore, called out. He was really young, had just gotten the insignia marking a few weeks ago, and was starting the long and tedious process of working his way up. It was still weird that he called me that though. We’d grown up together.
Since I was my wolf, I didn’t have to say anything. I sniffed both of them in greeting and then took off, heading toward the woods that surrounded our property.
Once I was in the safety of the thick forest, I took off at full speed toward my destination.
Getting off the property would be the hardest part, but I’d memorized the guards’ paths and knew when there would be a slight gap in coverage.
I’d also made sure everyone on duty today had less experience.
While Lio handled the training and hiring of the guards, I actually handled their schedules.
Basically, I did anything that involved a computer.
That was not Santino or Lio’s strong suits. It worked to my advantage now.
The timing had to be perfect, so I slowed down and waited for the right moment, and then sprinted through the last bit of our property until I felt slight tug of magic that was always there when crossing wards.
And then I was off again, going to where I knew I could shift and change.
M had put clothes and a burner phone for me in one of my brother’s drop boxes.
Everything I needed to go out on the streets would be there.
This particular box was deep in the woods and isolated. The perfect spot to leave what I needed and stay out of the way. I reached the alcove and sniffed. Typical nature as well as the faded scent of shifters filled the air, both wolves and bear, but nothing was recent. No one was around.
Relaxing, I quickly shifted back into my human form.
It was as easy as breathing, but it didn’t used to be.
Under Father, shifting to my wolf had been painful, and going back had been even harder.
It had been like my wolf form had known it would be way too long before I’d give into that side again and had fought for control so it wouldn’t be shoved into the box in the back of my mind.
Now, though, I felt none of the excruciating pain of bones breaking or the mental struggle I used to struggle with. My wolf easily gave up control to rest.
He was still close to the surface, but my human brain was functioning enough so that I could walk steadily.
As always, the first thing I did was make sure that I was still wearing the chain around my neck.
It was purposely long enough that I could shift with it and never take it off, but I still double-checked every time.
Breathing a little easier when my hand wrapped around the silver pendant, I squatted down in front of the box.
I put in the code and pulled out the bag left there.
I hadn’t seen the clothes that M had picked, but I was pleasantly surprised by his choices.
The fit was perfect, and the dark jeans and royal blue shirt with mesh sleeves was something I was comfortable wearing.
Plus, I thought I looked pretty hot. This was the easy part.
I buckled up my combat boots and smoothed down my hair.
I should have packed a mirror. Not much could be done for it now.
I took out the burner phone, a little cash, a fake ID, and two knives.
They weren’t mine, of course, and I’d much prefer having the two that had been gifted to me by Emilio, but I’d had no way of getting them here without causing suspicion.
I scanned the darkness for any sign something was off. My senses weren’t as strong in my human form, but still stronger than an average man’s. I could see pretty well at night, and my ability to smell was heightened. If anyone was around, I’d know it.
The coast was clear, and I needed to get a fucking move on. I had no way to reach out to M on the burner phone since it was a different number and he hadn’t added his contact in. I just had to get there on time.
The mile walk to where I’d scheduled to meet a driver was excruciating. All I wanted to do was shift and run, but I didn’t want to lose my clothes. I wished I could have booked the car closer to the manor, but that would have been a quick way for some innocent cab driver to get killed.
I finally reached my destination and sat in the back of the basic sedan as the driver pulled out, watching the city fly by as my nerves got the best of me.