Condemned to Love-Sample
Her teen crush is now a ruthless killer and powerful mafia heir. Will one life-altering night unite or destroy them?
Bennett Mazzone grew up ignorant of the truth: he is the illegitimate son of the most powerful mafia boss in New York. Until it suited his father to drag him into a world where power, wealth, violence, and cruelty are the only currency.
Celebrating her twenty-first birthday in Sin City should be fun for Sierra Lawson, but events take a deadly turn when she ends up in a private club, surrounded by dangerous men who always get what they want.
And they want her .
Ben can’t believe his ex’s little sister is all grown up, stunningly beautiful, and close to being devoured by some of the most ruthless men he has ever known. The Vegas trip is about strengthening ties, but he won’t allow his associates to ruin her perfection. Although it comes at a high price, saving Sierra is his only choice.
The memory of Ben’s hands on her body is seared into Sierra’s flesh for eternity. She doesn’t regret that night. Not even when she discovers the guy she was crushing on as a teenager is a cold, calculating killer with dark impulses and lethal enemies who want him dead.
Understanding the risks, she walks away from the only man she will ever love, stowing her secrets securely in her heart. Until the truth becomes leverage and Sierra is drawn into a bloody war—a pawn in a vicious game she doesn’t want to play.
As the web of deceit is finally revealed, Ben will stop at nothing to protect Sierra. Even if loving her makes him weak. In a world where women serve a sole purpose, and alliances mean the difference between life and death, can he fight for love and win?
Condemned to Love- Sample
Prologue
Sierra
“Y ou could always ask me to marry you,” Saskia says, batting her eyelashes at Ben like she’s sweet and innocent, and marriage-worthy, and not a cruel manipulative bitch who gets off on tormenting me any chance she gets. Her eyes dart over his shoulders, squinting in my direction, and I tuck my head back into the dark alcove, pressing my spine farther into the wall, praying she doesn’t find me spying on her. There will be hell to pay if she knows I’ve been listening to her nauseating attempt to convince her boyfriend to put a ring on it.
“What?” he splutters, a choked laugh slipping from his mouth. “You can’t be serious?”
The mounting panic sluicing through my veins slowly calms at the obvious disbelief in his voice. I rub a hand across my tight chest, wishing I could see his face, to know he’s not entertaining her laughable suggestion for even a second. I’ve often wondered how Ben has put up with my sister for so long. I thought, for sure, he would have kicked her to the curb within those first few weeks of dating. But he has stuck it out for a year. If you ask me, he deserves a gold medal for putting up with my eldest sister for that long.
“Why the hell wouldn’t I be?” Saskia snaps in a tone I’m more familiar with.
“Because you’re twenty and I’m twenty-one, for starters,” Ben replies in a more conciliatory tone.
“We’re adults,” Saskia huffs while I roll my eyes.
She loves to throw that one at me on the regular. “I’m an adult, Sierra, and you’re still a kid. You will do what I say, or I’ll tell Daddy you’re being a brat again.” I clench my fists at my sides, wishing there wasn’t such an age gap between me and my sisters. Maybe, if we were closer in age, they wouldn’t see me as their problematic little sister, and I wouldn’t feel like such an outsider in my own family.
The only one who truly gets me is Mom.
To my sisters, I’m a nuisance.
To Father, I’m an unfortunate accident who continues to mess up his perfect life because I won’t conform.
I might be only thirteen, and still discovering who I am, but I know enough about myself to want to forge my own path in life. Not to willingly follow the plan Father has mapped out for me—the same way he has done with my two sisters—just because we have to keep up appearances as the daughters of one of the wealthiest, most powerful, and most successful businessmen in the US.
Screw that.
I will make my own way in life, thank you very much.
And if he wants to cut me off, so be it. I would rather be broke and free to make my own decisions than miserable and rich.
“Old enough to vote, and have sex, and get married,” Saskia adds, as I resume eavesdropping on their conversation.
Ben clears his throat. “Please tell me you’re not suggesting we get married so we can have sex.”
My cheeks warm at the turn in their conversation, and a foreign fluttery feeling swirls in my belly. It’s the same sensation I get any time I daydream about Bennett Carver.
I’m sure there is some rule about not crushing on your sister’s boyfriend, and maybe I’ll be struck down for my naughty thoughts, but I can’t help liking Ben because he is awesome. And freaking hot. I can’t deny I have fantasized about running my fingers through his thick dark-brown hair like I’ve seen Saskia doing, or staring deep into his piercing blue eyes, or that I have imagined what it would feel like to touch him and kiss him. The warmth in my cheeks expands until it feels like they’re on fire, and I press a clammy palm to my face, willing the flames to die down.
My sister is so lucky, because Ben is gorgeous. But it’s not just that he’s good-looking—he is sweet and kind and funny, and he treats me like I’m a person of worth, not like I’m something nasty clinging to the bottom of his shoe.
He sees me. Like Mom sees me. And I love him for that.
“I’m not suggesting it for that reason.” Saskia’s voice lowers, and the husky sound grates on my nerves. “In fact, I’ve decided I don’t want to wait any longer. I want you.”
To hell with the consequences. I need to see what’s going on. Cautiously, I poke my head out of the alcove, smothering my pain as I watch my sister curl her arms around Ben’s neck, rubbing the fine hairs on his nape, while she stares at his mouth like she wants to eat him alive.
“I thought you were waiting for your wedding night,” Ben coolly replies, his tone giving nothing away.
“I’ve changed my mind,” she purrs, pressing her body against his.
Ben’s hands rest lightly on her hips, and I scowl, wanting to rush into the room and yank him away from her. “Why?”
“Why does it matter?” she says, an edge creeping into her voice. “I’ll let you fuck me. Isn’t that what you’ve wanted all along?”
Releasing her, Ben takes a step back, running a hand through his hair. “I’ve respected your wishes, Saskia, and I never put any pressure on you. Don’t make out like I’m forcing you into doing something.”
“Why does everything have to be such a big deal with you?” she hisses, folding her arms across her chest and glaring at him.
“What the fuck?” He cranks out a laugh. “You have the nerve to accuse me of that after you’ve just suggested marriage? Do you even hear how crazy you sound?”
“Don’t make fun of my feelings.” Her lip juts out in a pout, and I roll my eyes again. “I love you, and I know we belong together, so why wait?”
“Whoa.” Ben takes another step back, dragging his hand through his hair again. “Enough with the heavy. I came to take you out to dinner, and it’s feeling more and more like an ambush.”
“Now you’re being dramatic.” Saskia pokes him in the chest with her finger, and I’m gonna give myself eyestrain if I roll my eyes any more.
“Maybe we should do this another night,” Ben says, and Saskia’s eyes widen briefly in alarm.
“Don’t get your panties in a bunch.” She closes the gap between them, placing her hands on his chest over his black button-up shirt. “We can’t celebrate our one-year anniversary any night but tonight.” She plants a faux sugary smile on her face that to me always makes her look like she’s constipated. “Forget I said anything. We can talk about it later.”
His sigh is loud in the silent room, but whatever he sees on her face seals the deal. “Okay. Let’s just go out and have fun.” He tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear, and I want to rip his fingers away from her. I hate that she gets to feel his hands on her. I wish I was older so I could fight her for him, because I would make a much better girlfriend.
“I need to finish getting ready,” Saskia says, making a move toward the door.
I don’t wait to hear the end of the conversation. I slip around the corner of the alcove and exit the room, racing in my bare feet toward my studio before she comes out and catches me.
Twenty minutes later, I have forgotten all about my sister and Ben as I paint swirls of vibrant color on the canvas in broad sweeping strokes.
Mom turned one of the extra reception rooms into an art studio for me a few years ago, and it’s my safe haven in this monstrosity we call home. If I’ve had a bad day or something is bugging me, I lock myself away in here and vent my feelings through art. I don’t discriminate and I don’t restrict myself, experimenting with whatever appeals to my creative side. Mom indulges my whims, and I have taken classes in oil painting, watercolors, pottery, and jewelry making. Right now, I’m taking a photography class, and I’m enjoying getting a feel for the new Nikon camera Mom bought me for my birthday.
But today is a day for expressing myself through painting. The wide windows at the back of my studio face the rear gardens, and I love the view. I started out painting the beautiful manicured lawn and neat flower beds, but now it’s evolved into a crazy burst of colors and strokes and dots on the canvas as I let my creative streak take control.
A firm rap on the door pulls me out of my head, and a massive smile spreads over my mouth when the door opens and Ben sticks his head in. “Am I interrupting the genius at work?” he quips, flashing me a blinding smile that has my insides swooning.
“Yes, but I don’t mind your interruptions,” I say, setting my paintbrush down on the side of my easel. Grabbing a wet wipe from the pack, I clean paint off my fingers as I walk toward him.
Ben eases into the room, closing the door slightly but not fully shutting it. “Good, because I brought you something.” His smile expands as he walks toward me, extending the small box.
A squeal escapes my lips, and I clap my hands. “They’ve reopened?” My favorite bakery had shut down without explanation a few weeks ago, and I’d given up hope of ever tasting their delicious cupcakes again.
He nods, handing me the box. “I noticed lights on in the bakery as I was driving here, and I had to pull over and grab a cupcake for my favorite firefly.” He ruffles my hair, and warmth spreads over every inch of my body.
Opening the box, I let my long blonde hair hang around my face to disguise the blush staining my cheeks. “Red velvet. Yum.” I swipe my index finger into the soft sweet frosting.
“It’s your favorite, right?” He props his butt against the long table behind us.
“That and their…”
“Peanut butter truffle cupcakes,” he finishes for me.
I beam at him as I suck icing off my finger. “You know me well.”
“I think I do.” He waggles his brows as his eyes scan the room. “Damn, Firefly, you’ve really taken to photography. Those pictures are amazing.”
Every part of me melts at his compliment. I spin around, perusing the collection of photos stuck haphazardly to the far wall. “I’m still learning about technique, but it’s fun. I’m enjoying it.”
“You are so talented.” He pushes off the table and walks toward the wall on the other side, his fingers brushing over the newest additions to my mural. I copied a scene from one of the Harry Potter movies, depicting the Hogwarts Castle elevated high above the ground with a lush green forest at the base. I’ve added to it over the months since I started it, as the mood took me.
“You added Harry,” he says, looking over his shoulder at me.
“And Hermione and Ron.” Walking to his side, I point at the small figures elevated in the sky upon broomsticks. “I had to add a quidditch game after we went on the ride at Universal Studios.” My finger traces the circular edge of the golden snitch, and I smile as contentment sweeps through me.
Ben and painting make me happy, and I could burst with joy in this moment.
“You find inspiration everywhere, Sierra. I wouldn’t mind seeing the world through your eyes.”
“The world is one giant pool of inspiration. How could I not be inspired every second of every minute of every day?”
He leans down, bringing his gorgeous face close to mine, and I forget how to breathe. “I think you’re the one who’s inspirational, Firefly.” Very carefully, he tucks some stray strands of my hair behind my ear, and my cheeks inflame. But I refuse to be embarrassed, holding his gaze as he smiles adoringly at me. “Never change.”
“Uh, I won’t,” I croak, disappointed when he straightens up and steps back.
“I thought I might find you here,” Saskia says, and I jump at the unexpected sound of her voice, emitting a high-pitched shriek.
“Oh my God. You frightened me.”
She narrows her eyes. “It’s not nice when people eavesdrop on private conversations, is it?” she asks, making it clear she knew I was spying on her earlier.
“Ben brought me a cupcake,” I retort, waving the box at her.
“You’ll get fat,” she drawls, her gaze roaming me from head to toe. “And it’s not like you can get away with packing on the pounds. You’re already looking pudgy around the middle.”
My face explodes, popping bright red with burning embarrassment. I fight tears, not wanting her to see how much she has upset me. How could she say that in front of Ben?
“Saskia. Don’t be so cruel,” Ben says, and I love how quickly he always comes to my defense. He’s my hero, and I will always worship the ground he walks on. He turns to me, his features softening. “You’re perfect just the way you are.” He pats the top of my head, and my embarrassment puffs into thin air.
“I’m just trying to educate my little sister. The world is a cruel place,” Saskia says, stalking across the room. She threads her fingers through Ben’s, and I grind my teeth to the molars. “And only ugly old dudes want to fuck fat chicks.” She pats me on the head, but her gesture is completely condescending. “So, eat your calorie-laden cupcake, Firefly , but don’t blame me when you end up fat and alone.”
Ben yanks his hand from Saskia’s, but it only gives me a tiny bit of joy because her hurtful words and scathing look pierce the walls I hide behind, and her strike hits deep.
I know I have put on some weight lately, only because I haven’t hit my growth spurt yet. I’m the smallest in my class with most of my friends towering over me. Mom said I shouldn’t worry about it since the weight will fall off when I grow taller. I usually pride myself on not being obsessed with my appearance, unlike Saskia and Serena who spend hours in front of the mirror, but I’m not strong enough to protect myself from such a horrid attack. I thought older sisters were supposed to protect their little sisters, not be mean and cruel for no reason.
“You are way out of line, Saskia,” Ben says through gritted teeth. “Apologize to Sierra.”
She huffs out a laugh. “You’re my boyfriend, not my father, and I won’t apologize for being honest. God knows Sierra doesn’t stop to consider anyone else’s feelings when she speaks her mind.”
Ben opens his mouth, to defend me again, I assume, but I cut across him this time. “It’s fine, Ben. I’m used to Saskia’s personal brand of education. And I don’t care what she says,” I lie, stuffing the cupcake into my mouth while I spit fire at my sister through my eyes.
She pins me with a disgusted look, opening her mouth to insult me, I’m sure, but she stops, mouth open like a fish out of water, when Ben levels her with a dark look that is kinda scary.
“Can we be done with this?” she asks a few seconds later when she’s composed herself.
Ben mutters under his breath, his chest heaving, before nodding.
Swallowing the delicious light spongy texture, I race to the table, snatch the painting I had set aside, and dash to the door before they leave. “Thank you for the cupcake,” I tell him, thrusting the drawing at him. “I painted this for you.”
He smiles as he takes the painting, his eyes carefully examining the picture I created especially for him. “A firefly, glowing with light and energy just like the little girl who drew it,” he says.
I try not to feel disappointment at his “little girl” comment, but it’s hard not to feel dejected. I know my feelings will never be returned, and comments like that shatter the illusion. Yet I’d rather dwell in blissful ignorance when it comes to Bennett Carver.
“Thank you, Sierra. I love it.” He bends down, pressing a soft kiss to my cheek, and my legs almost go out from under me. Behind him, Saskia smirks, her haughty expression telling me she knows all about my crush on her boyfriend. “I will treasure it always.”
Saskia rolls her eyes. “It’s a stupid painting from an impressionable kid with a crush. Please don’t pretend like it’s some masterpiece.”
“You’re being a complete bitch, and my patience is in limited supply,” Ben tells her, looking like he’s two seconds away from snapping her neck.
I’m not sure I’d care if he did.
“Oh, relax.” Saskia attempts to laugh it off. “You’re so tense tonight.” She grabs his shoulders, digging her hands in. “But I can help with that after dinner,” she purrs, and my stomach lurches painfully.
“Would it kill you to be nice?” he asks, his eyes darting between Saskia and me.
“I am nice,” she protests, and I barely resist another eyeroll. “And I really don’t get why you bother. It’s not like she’s your little sister.”
A muscle pops in his jaw, and I inwardly rejoice at the fact my sister appears to have foot-in-mouth disease tonight. Maybe Ben has finally wised up. Maybe he’s planning to break up with her. God, I hope so, because he deserves so much better.
My joy is short-lived though as I contemplate what it would mean. I wouldn’t see him anymore. He wouldn’t bring me cupcakes from the Mountainview Bakery, and he wouldn’t talk to me about my art or ask how school is, and I’d have one less person who seems to care about me in my life.
But I can sacrifice that if it means he is free of the witch and he finds someone nice who appreciates him.
“If I had a sibling,” Ben says, “I would cherish him or her and do everything to build them up, not tear them down. You don’t realize how lucky you are.”
“And you don’t realize how lucky you are being an only child,” she retorts.
Ben shoves her hands off him, and I can tell he’s working hard to control his temper. “Let’s just get out of here before we miss our dinner reservation,” he says after a few silent beats. He turns to me one final time, gracing me with a beautiful smile. “Good night, Firefly.”
“Good night, Ben.”
Maybe I had a sixth sense that night, but that was the last time I saw him. Less than a week later, Ben had mysteriously disappeared. Vanished without telling anyone, leaving his girlfriend behind without a word, fueling her anger and her heartbreak.
Over the years, I wondered what happened to him. Whether he was safe. Whether he was happy. Until he stopped occupying space in my head and I managed to forget him.
I never thought I’d ever see him again.
I never thought I’d need him to rescue me.
And I certainly never thought I’d grow to fear him.