Chapter 28
28
ALTA
I nsufferable heat woke me. My eyelashes were sealed together, making it challenging to peel them open on the first try. I blinked several times, clearing the dryness and allowing my eyes to focus in the dim light. An unfamiliar room came into view, with a few faint streams of buttery sunlight pouring through a set of blinds on a far window.
My annoyance at the sweltering heat grew as sweat beaded along my brow and between my thighs where they were pressed together, my knees curled against my chest. I made to fling off the heavy blankets but couldn’t. Something heavy rested across my shoulders, pinning me to the bed, adding to the heat.
Panic spiked through me. My heart raced and thoughts swirled.
What happened last night?
Where am I?
Who’s with me?
“Easy there, Birdie,” a familiar voice said from my back, right near my ear. “It’s just me, Chandler. You’re safe.”
Breathing still labored, I willed my body to relax under his hold. “I don’t understand what’s going on. Where am I?”
At that, the weight lifted. Immediately I shoved off the blankets. I swallowed gulps of the cool air before rolling to my back.
“Mathews didn’t want you to wake up alone.” Chandler clasped both hands behind his head and focused on the ceiling.
“Is he here?” I glanced back to the windows, the brightness making it seem a little later than I normally woke up because….
Grief engulfed me as the memories of last night hit. “Benny?” I asked, my voice breaking.
“I’m sorry, Birdie, but we don’t have an update. He made it through surgery, but he lost a lot of blood. That’s where Mathews is now. He got a couple hours of sleep, then went back out to check on him.”
“But he made it to the hospital and through surgery, so that’s something, right?”
Reaching over, he patted the top of my hand before pulling it back to his side. “Sure is, Birdie. And Mathews thinks that dog of yours could be the key to solving this case. He should be back—” The sound of a door slamming shut in the front room made him smile. “Ah, always on time, that one. Looks like my shift is up. Glad I could be here when you woke up.”
“Thank you.” I grabbed his hand and pulled it close. “For everything.”
“Peters.” Cas stood in the doorway with a murderous look on his hard features. “Get out.”
“How’s that for gratitude for you,” Chandler joked with an over-the-top wink. Shoving out of bed, he stretched his arms overhead with a loud groan. “Now it’s my turn to get some work done.”
Cas glared at Chandler as he crossed the room until the bedroom door shut behind him, leaving us alone in what I now realized was his room.
“You okay out here alone for a few minutes?” Cas asked as he tucked his hands into the back pockets of his jeans. “I need a quick shower. Peters is right outside.”
At my hesitant nod, he stripped off his black T–shirt and tossed it into a laundry hamper in the corner of the room.
Sounds of the faucet turning, water streaming from the shower, and him stripping from the rest of his clothes were evident through the bathroom door he left slightly ajar. As the water shifted, indicating he’d stepped in, I inched closer to the edge of the bed to have a direct line of sight into the bathroom.
A bit creepy, yes, but he was the one who left the door open.
Only his large shadowed form showed through the opaque shower curtain, but it was enough. Maybe it was my brain’s attempt to forget the trauma from last night, or the ever-present danger I was in, but I needed him. I squeezed my thighs together at the memory of his tongue and fingers teasing me inside and out.
This was crazy. I was a dead woman walking. My best friend almost died last night. Heck, I didn’t even know how I got in this room, but there I lay in his bed, panting with want. Only for him.
The shower shutting off sent me scrambling back under the covers. Towel around his hips, another rubbing against his shaggy light brown hair, Cas stepped into the bedroom, eyes on me.
“Hi,” I said with a little wave. A blush heated my cheeks as I took in his defined chest and abs. Chest hair covered his pecs and trailed down below the towel. He wasn’t hairy by any means, but it also didn’t look like manscaping was something he ever considered as an option. It looked masculine—like him. Everything about him pulsed all man. From his tattoos to the now-full beard and thick, muscular legs, every inch was as strong and intense as the rest of him.
“How are you feeling this morning?” he asked over his shoulder as he dug through a black duffel bag on the floor. I stared at his perky, firm ass shoving against the white towel, distracting me from his question. “Alta?”
“Huh?” I responded, still staring. When he didn’t respond, I tore my gaze from his backside only to find his dark eyes alight with humor.
“You seem okay,” he chuckled.
“Yeah,” I said, clearing my throat. “Chandler told me Benny made it through surgery, so I’m hopeful. Thank you for taking him last night. When can I see him?”
His broad shoulders rose and fell. “Going out isn’t the best idea for you right now. This guy is upping his game, and I don’t want you out there. Here we can protect you, take shifts, but there?” He shook his head. “Anything could happen, and I’m not willing to risk that. Soon though. I promise I’ll take you to him soon.”
Even though I understood where he was coming from, I still longed to see Benny for myself. Last night was terrible. The whole day was terrible, but with all the sorrow and hell going on around me, here in this room, everything settled. I settled.
“My head is killing me,” I grumbled. A slow throb had started the second I shifted to get a better view into the bathroom.
He hitched his chin toward the nightstand. “Bottle of water and two Tylenol already there for you.”
While I took the medicine and chugged the water, Cas tugged on a pair of boxer briefs and mesh shorts, only giving me a peek of his bare ass as he did.
Thirst quenched, I snuggled back down into the covers and rolled to my side, facing his side of the bed. Taking the hint, Cas crawled in, staying outside the covers, and lay on his back.
“I’m sorry about Benny.” He rolled his head along the pillow until those dark brown eyes met mine. “I really am. He’s a cool- ass dog, and I know you love him and relied on him to keep you safe. He’s a tough one though,” he said with a reassuring smile. “I have no doubt that dog will pull through.”
The pillowcase shifted beneath my cheek as I nodded. “Do we know… do they know what happened to him?”
He rubbed a hand along his ever-growing scruff as he thought over my question.
“Not positive, but looks like whoever broke in got through the front door, and then all hell broke loose. The blood in the cabin”—he winced—“suggested he was shot or stabbed there, then carried out into the woods, which I assume was to draw you out.”
“It worked.”
“No shit,” he grumbled. “I get why you wanted to run out there, but why? Why did you do it? You knew this guy’s play and still you did it. Thank fuck he wasn’t out there waiting for you.”
My eyes widened a fraction. Slowly I slipped my hand from under the sheets and held it close to my face like I was raising my hand in a classroom.
“What,” he deadpanned. “I don’t like that look.”
“Well, you see….” I ducked under the covers, tugging them tight around my head.
“Lady, get out here.”
I didn’t.
“Alta.”
Still nope. He was going to be pissed.
“I don’t want to tell you,” I muttered from under the covers. Beads of sweat formed along my forehead and my palms beneath the sweltering covers. I needed fresh cold air, but no way was I ready to give up the mock safety of my blanket fort.
I yelped when cold air brushed down my face and arms as the blankets ripped from my tight fists. A shiver shook my shoulders and legs at the sudden contrast in temperatures.
“Talk. Now.”
I shook my head. This was fun. “And what if I don’t?”
“This isn’t a game, Lady.”
“Could it be?” Wow, okay, who said that? No way those words came out of my mouth.
One eyebrow rose along his forehead, and a mischievous smirk tugged at his lips. It was beautiful. Like that, he looked young, unlike the other 90 percent of the time when he looked pissed or stressed.
“How old are you?” I asked, cocking my head to the side, inspecting every inch of his handsome face.
“Old enough.”
“That’s vague.”
“Would it change your mind about me?”
“No,” I said with a laugh. “Why would it?”
“Then it doesn’t matter. I’m legal age, if that’s what you want to know.”
A giggle pushed past my lips, tickling my chest at the vibrations. A sense of awe settled over his face as he stared at my broad smile.
“You amaze me, Lady. All the world has dealt you and here you are, smiling. How do you do it?” The sense of wonder in his tone made my heart swell.
My shoulders slid the sheets up and down with my shrug. “I don’t know if I would be if you weren’t here. You make it better.”
His scoffing laugh wiped the smile from my face. “Normally I’m the one making things worse.”
“Not with me,” I said. Reaching over, I tugged on his shoulder, making him roll on his side, facing me. “I’ve had more fun with you these past few days, even with all this going on, than I have in years. Years, Cas. And that’s because of you and who you are. You’re inclined to only see the worst in yourself, but I wish you’d be just as inclined to see the good, like me.”
His nostrils flared at my words. The bed shuddered as his breathing turned fast and heavy. “Say yes, Lady.”
I didn’t even think. “Yes.”
Lightning fast, his hand jutted across the small space between us to tangle in my hair. With a sharp tug, he slid me across the bed to him. Hand under my shoulder, he rolled my chest onto his.
Once, twice I blinked, staring down at his parted lips. Beneath me, his heart hammered against his chest, matching the racing of my own.
“All you have to say is stop,” he murmured as he angled my head to lengthen my neck. Warm, wet lips slid along my pulsing veins before teeth sank deep in the skin just below the collar of my sweatshirt. “I’m trusting you to tell me if this gets to be too much.”
“I trust you,” I groaned. On its own, my leg swept over his, hauling the rest of me over his long, lean body.
I gasped as the grip on my hair tightened, bringing my face to meet his. Fire burned behind his eyes. “Right now, I don’t. I’ve wanted this since you fell on your ass in the parking lot. I won’t stop unless you tell me to, do you understand?”
I tried to nod, but the grip on my hair was too tight to move. “Yes, Cas, yes. Now, please.”
The corners of his lips tugged upward in a cocky smirk. “Please what, Lady?”
“Kiss me,” I begged. Shifting my hips back and forth, I ground against him. “Take it away. Take away yesterday, the last ten years, all of it.” Focusing on keeping my breath steady, I dragged my quivering lips against his. “Give me a good memory to dwell on when everything else is falling apart around me. Give me you.”
“You already have me, Lady.”
His lips sealed over mine, pressing hard. Desperate to rid my rapid thoughts of yesterday, I gripped his short locks between my fingers and tugged. My need for him must’ve sparked something inside him, as one second I was on top, controlling the kiss, and the next my back pressed into the soft mattress, his hard body half covering mine.
“Fucking hell, I love kissing you,” Cas muttered reverently against my lips. “You make me feel… wanted.” He pulled back, his dark eyes boring into my hazel ones. “Mine,” he gritted out.
“Show me,” I said between labored breaths. “Make me yours.”
Whoever this woman was saying these things, precisely what she was feeling, was a badass—I liked her a lot.
He ripped the sweatshirt over my head fast and rough, snapping my head forward and then back against the pillow. Naked from the waist up, Cas stared at my exposed breasts, licking his lips that were pulled into a feral smile. Every inch of my exposed skin sizzled under his perusing eyes. With his focus locked on my hardened nipples, his calloused palm skimmed up from my belly and between my breasts to wrap around my neck.
My breath hitched as his hold tightened, which only made his smile grow wilder.
Deviously slow, he moved closer, so close that his hot, panting breaths brushed over the swell of both breasts. I knew what was coming, based off the last time he had me in a similar hold, but I still gasped, my eyes rolling into the back of my head, when his teeth sank deep into the soft tissue, marking me. A slow, soothing lick quickly followed, almost as an apology, only for him to kiss his way over to the other side and complete the same territorial claiming.
Pulling back, he smiled at his handiwork. Shifting his gaze, he watched me as his free hand dangled over a peaked nipple. I squirmed beneath him, but couldn’t go far with his weight on me and his hand still around my throat.
“Patience, Lady,” he chuckled. “You wanted to forget, and I’m making sure this is the only thing you ever remember.”
The heat from his fingers teased as he lowered them, barely brushing over the stiff peak. My sigh of pleasure at his touch turned into a groan as he squeezed the tight bud between his thumb and finger. Shocks of pleasure and pain swirled, making the slow pulse between my thighs turn unbearable.
Cas watched from his high perch as I squirmed and whimpered with each twist and tug. With a slow grind of his hips, pressing his hardness exactly where I needed it, I shifted back and forth, matching his rhythm and adding to my misery.
Taking my lower lip between his, he sucked hard while continuing his other forms of torture below. My breaths came faster and his pace quickened, thrusting his erection over my sweat pants and creating delicious friction between us.
With his teeth nipping at one nipple and fingers tugging on the other, I crumbled beneath him, gasping for air as stars burst behind my closed lids. His deep, proud chuckle made a slow smile spread up my lips.
Tugging the sweat pants down my thighs, he tossed them and my underwear to the floor. My mind flipped to last night when he helped me get dressed, and now here he was ripping it all off.
“Last night,” I whispered. “Last night you took care of me.”
The soft lips working their way up my thigh paused. Looking down, I found confusion in his eyes.
“You’re mine to take care of, Lady. Never doubt that.” When he resumed his sucking up my inner thigh, I felt more than saw his lips spread in a smile. “This is my favorite way of taking care of you, just so you know.”
Closer and closer, his mouth moved toward my center. The ache that was tamed earlier had returned, causing a deep, wild throb with my rapid pulse. Everything faded to black when his lips wrapped around me, sucking my nub between his lips and lightly scraping his teeth down. I released the sheets that were balled in my hand to weave them through his hair, pushing and tugging him for more.
A quick pang of soreness hit as his finger slid in deep. His hand and mouth stilled.
“I’m fine,” I said, my voice shaking.
“Lady, if you’re sore from that”—concern laced his features as he stared where his finger had dove inside my body—“I’ll break you. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Please, Cas,” I begged. Tugging on his hair, I pulled him up my body, putting his face inches from mine. “I need this. I need you.”
For a brief moment, I thought he’d say no. Panic set in at the idea of his rejection.
With a deep sigh of resignation, he turned to kiss the inside of my palm.
In awe, I studied every move of his muscled arms and abs as he pushed from the bed. After grabbing a condom from his duffel bag, he placed the wrapper between his teeth and tugged his shorts down. My eyes widened at the bulge restrained in his tight black boxer briefs.
Chewing on the edge of my thumb, I glanced up, only to find him already looking back with his face pinched like he was in pain.
“I’ll be fine,” I encouraged.
With a nod, his briefs hit the floor and he was standing stark naked before me. I held a breath, ready to fight back the inevitable panic attack. But it didn’t come. Instead, scanning every inch of the most masculine man I’d ever seen, Cas’s nakedness did the opposite. I needed him. Now.
The tear of the condom wrapper inched up the pulsing anticipation. Every part of me was ready for him, wanted him. Yesterday didn’t matter right now. The case, Benny, Sadie, John—nothing mattered except what was going on in this room. Us. Together.
Cas climbed up the bed, hovering over me with a lingering look of apprehension in his eyes.
For encouragement, I spread my legs beneath him, hooking my heels around his thick thighs. A tight hiss passed through his lips as he settled between my legs, sliding up and down my wet folds.
“I’m trying,” he gritted out. “I don’t want to hurt you, but fuck, I want you so bad. I want to feel you all around me. I want to make you scream my name, make you never forget where I’ve been. Stop me if I?—”
Not allowing him to finish, I yanked him down. His lips collided with my own, our teeth clashing in a fierce kiss.
With a slow roll of his hips, he positioned himself just outside my opening before sliding in an inch. Internal muscles burned as they stretched to the max. Tears sprang up as he pushed deeper. I grimaced as I arched off the bed at the contradicting feelings of wanting more and needing less. The delicious pain was one that I wanted more of. Everything hurt, but in the best way possible.
“Lady, talk to me,” Cas said, his voice deep and strained.
“More.” It was what I wanted, but I also knew it was what he needed too.
He withdrew gently, only to push back in harder than the first time, his control slipping with each second my muscles squeezed him. His pace increased, pushing me past the pain and shoving me into a deep pleasure I’d never experienced before. Desperately he sucked and nipped down my neck, which I arched out long just for him. The bed shook, thumping against the wall as his thrusts turned demanding. I dug my fingers into the defined muscles of his back, holding on while the fog of lust and pleasure thickened.
One hard thrust, him sinking deeper than ever, my fingers curled and I tossed my head side to side as a shoulder-shaking orgasm barreled through. My lazy eyelids opened halfway to find him wearing a proud smile.
“Wow,” I breathed.
He chuckled and shifted. The new angle drew out a loud moan from my core. Still grinning like a fool, he dipped a hand between our bodies. Fingers on my clit, he pressed down while drawing lazy circles. “Oh, Lady, we’re just getting started.”
I shivered at the promise in his voice.
Eyes closed, I concentrated on every place our bodies touched, focused on the swirl of his fingers and penetrating force. For the first time in a long, long time, no bad memories threatened, no worries clouded my thoughts.
I never wanted it to end.