Chapter 9
Camden
“I should go back to my apartment.”
I jerk my gaze up from the book I’ve been pretending to read.
Simone is standing in the doorway to the library. Her hands are clasped together. She’s wearing soft cotton yoga pants, a pink T-shirt, and socks. Her hair is in a ponytail. It’s brown now, which is a better color for her.
I hold out a hand so she’ll come to me. “What do you need from your apartment, Baby girl? I can go get it, or maybe Natasha and Jameson could make a trip over there.”
“No. I should go back there to live.”
I figured that’s what she meant, but since it doesn’t compute, I ignored it. My chest tightens. She has shuffled slightly closer, but the distance between us is still huge.
I keep my hand extended to her. “Come, Little one. What’s brought this on?”
She inches closer. “I need to work out my shit. I can’t do that if I hide from my life. Your home is a fortress. No one can get to me here. It’s too easy to pretend nothing ever happened.”
“Simone, you’re safe here. Why would you want to go somewhere that makes you feel unsafe?”
She shrugs. “Because that’s real life. People live in apartments. They walk from their cars to the front door. They take stairs and elevators. That’s life.”
“That is life for most people , but you’re not most people. You don’t need to do that. I’d rather pack up your apartment and move everything you need here.”
She lowers her gaze to the floor. “I’m a burden to you.”
Jesus .
“Simone,” I say, my tone harsher. “Are you going to come to me, or do I need to come get you?”
She lifts her gaze. Her brow is furrowed from some odd frustration. “Why are those my only two choices? Why don’t you ever get more dominant with me? I bet if I’d never been attacked and I ignored a directive like that, you would have me over your knees already.”
“This is true. Your ass would be red hot by now. Is that what you want?” I’m not sure what she’s trying to tell me. I’m not sure she knows either.
She shrugs. “Sometimes,” she mutters. “Everything is all messed up. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.” A small sob escapes her, and she wrings her hands together.
I lower my hand to point at the floor in front of me without saying a single word. I need to be firm. I’m not going to engage until she’s standing where I’ve told her to.
She sniffles, but she closes the distance. Finally.
When I can reach her, I set my hands on her hips and pull her between my legs. “What was it supposed to be like, Simone?”
“You were supposed to call me after I graduated, and then we were going to go on a date, and then we would have found out we were as compatible as we both knew we would be, and then you would have brought me here and we would have talked and negotiated, and then you would have dominated me and we were going to like our dynamic and fall madly in love and live happily ever after…”
She says all of that so fast it’s hard to follow, her voice rising with every new item on her list. In the end, she throws her hands up like duh .
I want to chuckle. She’s so fucking adorable. But this is serious to her. It’s no laughing matter.
“Now it’s all messy and ruined,” she says before pushing her lip out in a pout.
I pull her closer between my legs. “Baby, nothing is ruined. Not even close. There was a bump in the road for us, and I’m so fucking sorry about that.
But you’re here. The first few items on your list got a bit wonky.
I failed you when I didn’t call you. I should have.
I’ll never fully forgive myself for hesitating to contact you. ”
She gasps, eyes wide. “No. You don’t get to do that.” She shakes her head. “You don’t get to take the blame for some stranger attacking me.”
I shrug. “We can agree to disagree on that. It’s a fact.
I didn’t call. If I had, all those things on your list would have happened in one day.
You know it. I know it. I would have taken you on a date and brought you back here.
We would have negotiated, and then most likely clothes would have flown around the room before I showed you exactly what it means to be mine in a way you never would have doubted or forgotten. ”
She swallows hard. “See? It’s all fucked up.”
I narrow my gaze. “Enough cussing. I’ve given you a pass until now, but that’s expired. No more. You’re Little. Little girls do not cuss.”
She shivers, which tells me something. She’s been waiting for me to dominate her. “Yes, Sir,” she murmurs.
“So, we didn’t go on a date. We can do that. We can get dressed up if you want. We can go to a nice restaurant. We can pretend none of this happened and we’re spending our first night together.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t want to go out. See? It’s all messed up. I’d be looking over my shoulder the entire time, wondering if my attacker was also dining there so he could get retribution for me scratching him.”
“How about an at-home date? How about if we get dressed up and have a date in the dining room? I could order in fancy food, and we could pretend we’re at a fine restaurant.”
She shrugs. At least she’s not poo-pooing the idea.
“Simone, when you’re ready, we are absolutely going to negotiate, and then I’m going to dominate you.
We’re both going to love every second of it and fall madly in love and live our happily ever after.
Like I said, we hit a speed bump. We will get back on track as soon as we get the fender repaired. ” I smile, hoping to soften her.
Her eyes are watery. “I’m messed up, Camden. It’s not fair to you. I go into my head when you’re not with me. I’m sucking the life out of you.”
“Simone Lighton, you are not sucking the life out of me. If you were, I’d say feel free to do so for the next sixty years.”
She leans the lower half of her body against me and fiddles with the front of my shirt. “Only sixty?”
I chuckle. “In sixty years, I’ll be one hundred and two. I don’t know how much more life you could suck from me at that age, but if you still want to be sucking me, I doubt I’ll turn you down.” I mince her words intentionally.
She finally manages a small smile. “And yet… If I wanted to suck you right now, you would turn me down.”
I draw in a slow breath. She’s killing me. “Only because I want you to make sound choices. I’m worried your head isn’t in the right place to decide to start giving me blowjobs.” I try to sound teasing. I’m not sure I succeed.
She rolls her eyes. I’m grateful I can finally see both of them. There’s still some bruising around one eye, but it’s much better. The bruises on her body are mostly faded, too. What’s left is the emotional trauma.
“I could probably give a blowjob if you told me what to do,” she mutters. She’s being serious. She’s never given a blowjob. She’s also being tentative because she knows I will turn her down.
I don’t want to hurt her feelings or reject her. Not at all. But I also would never want to do anything that might further traumatize my girl. “Blowjobs don’t really need instructions, Little one. But you’re not going to suck my cock today, either.”
She pouts. “Poop.” She’s not surprised.
“I know you spoke with Natasha about talking to someone. Quinten Odell. Would you mind if I called him?”
She slumps all the way forward and sets her cheek against my shoulder. “I guess.”
Good. We’re making progress.
I thread my fingers in her ponytail. “You’re mine, Simone. In sickness and in health. We’re still going through the sickness part to get it out of the way, but we’ll get through this.”
“Living with you is putting a crimp in my sex life,” she mumbles against my neck.
I stop breathing. What the hell does that mean? “Uhh… Pardon?”
She leans back and narrows her gaze at me. “Not sex with boys, silly. Sex with myself. It’s not like I brought a vibrator here in my purse. Plus, you’re always with me at night and in the bathtub. Now that I’m healed, I’m having orgasm withdrawal.” Again with the pouty lip.
My heart resumes beating with her clarification. I chuckle. “See? That’s my Simone. She’s in there. She just needs to come out and stay. Only my sassy, naughty Little girl would say something so bold. How often do you usually masturbate, sassy girl?”
She shrugs. “A few times a day.”
I lift my brows. “Is that so?”
“Give or take.” She’s so brazen that she doesn’t even look away. This is my girl. I want this from her all the time. I want her to spend half the day plotting how to shock me and the other half putting her plans into action.
She’s going to keep me on my toes.
I tap her nose. “Your masturbation days are over, Little one.”
She gasps dramatically. “What?”
“You heard me.” She expected this. Asked for it. “Your pussy is mine now. No one else touches it, including you.”
“You can’t stop me from touching myself, Camden.”
“Sure I can.”
She shakes her head. “Eventually you’ll have to leave the house. In the fall, you’ll go back to work. I’ll be here fingering myself all over your house as soon as you leave.”
I laugh. “I don’t think so.”
“How could you stop me?”
This. This is my girl. This is the Little I’ve been waiting for. I know she’s likely to slide back into her blank stare in a while, but I’ll take this for now. It’s a tremendous improvement. Maybe a few visits with Quinten would help her heal sooner rather than later.
“Well, let’s see. Cameras, for one.”
“In every room?” she asks, eyes wide.
“I guess I could lock you in one room and put them in every corner,” I joke. “Or cuff you to the bed.”
“Neither of those options would be very safe.”
“Mmmm,” I pretend to ponder. “I could cuff your hands to a collar on your neck so you wouldn’t be able to lower them to your naughty pussy.”
She gasps in that silly exaggerated way again. “Collar? I’m not into kitten play.”
“How about puppy play?”
She shakes her head so hard that her ponytail flies around and hits her in the face on both sides.
“Well, shoot. I guess we’ll just have to use the honor system then.
I’m telling you that you will not touch your pussy anymore.
When I’ve been away for any length of time, I’ll look you in the eyes and ask you if you were naughty.
” I slide my hands around to her back and pull her in tight.
“You may be a sassy girl with a naughty streak, but I don’t think lying is in your repertoire. ”
“Poop,” she repeats.
“Besides, you won’t need to masturbate. I promise to keep you sated.” I grin.
“Cocky much?”
“Very.” I slide a hand between her thighs from behind and cup her pussy through the thin cotton. “I could also check to make sure you’re wearing the same panties as I put on you before I left and make sure they’re not wet.”
“Ha. I could take them off and put them back on. Plus…can I just point out that my panties are nearly always wet when I’m near you, thinking about you, even when I’m asleep.”
I chuckle. “Asleep?”
“Probably dreaming about you. Sometimes I wake up with wet panties and don’t even remember the dream. I just know it was about you because thoughts of you linger in my head all the time.”
I can’t keep the smile off my face. I know she’s not talking about this week. She’s talking about the past four years. Cocky doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel.
She sets her forehead against mine.
I smooth my hands back up to her shoulders. “Simone, stop arguing with me. I’m your Daddy. For life. You’re mine. We’ll figure all this shit out together. It’s a blip on the radar.”
“I’m a mess.”
“It’s only been a week since a man attacked and beat you, Simone. I’d be very concerned if you weren’t a mess.”
“Okay, but how long are you going to deny me sex and punishments?”
“How about if you let me make an appointment with Quinten and we’ll see what he has to say?”
She sighs. “Okay, fine.”
“Or… Yes, Sir.”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Good girl.” I’ll call him now.