Chapter 7
SEVEN
Present
THISTLE
I waited anxiously in the large room that was supposed to be mine, watching the clock on the TV tick down, wringing my hands.
I wasn’t perfect like Ace had said that day—not even close.
Never had been, never would be.
But Ace had been promised to me by the universe—even if, on the day I’d met him, I still hadn’t believed we could truly be destined.
In the end, I’d learned that a mate was the most important thing in the world. Because even if he hated me and broke me, he couldn’t leave me.
That part wasn’t allowed.
It’s why I had to get the truth out of Knox, because now… now I had another.
It was nice enough in here, I supposed. The bed was gigantic, draped in huge thick comforters that could swallow an Omega whole, and the heavy curtains covered massive windows, blocking out any hint of the outdoors. There was a walk-in wardrobe, and a fancy oak desk along the wall that could probably home a dozen sketchbooks. Or one really big one.
But more importantly, Knox’s bedroom and office were just down the hall. I had to pass them to get to the kitchen. That meant he hadn’t bought me so he could stuff me out of sight forever.
Ace had given me my own rooms with so much space it had blown my mind. I’d been excited until I realised I wasn’t allowed to leave, and all that space was just distance between us.
But here, there wasn’t even a lock on my door.
I mean, not that it really mattered since he wasn’t mine, but I was trying to get a read on him, and he was making it difficult.
The gun had been clutched to my chest for so long it was warm by the time I stood, pulling the sheet nightgown around it and Bunny in hopes that it would keep the weapon out of sight.
A map of the mansion formed in my mind as I headed down the hallway of the north wing.
I paused before his room, gathering courage, and when I finally pushed it open, the heavy oak door was almost silent as it swung out over rich hardwood.
Knox waited for me just like he said he would, and he looked up from the book open in his lap as I stepped in. He was seated on his bed, back to the headboard, ankles crossed. He’d changed, now topless with black sweatpants. The lean muscles rippling across his torso were hard not to stare at as I crept in, pinned by his caramel eyes.
I didn’t have to be nervous, though. Bunny always protected me, and now I had Bunny and a gun, so everything would work out.
He beckoned me over, relaxed as he tucked a bookmark into the book, a smile curving his lips as he looked me up and down. I hadn’t changed clothes or nothing, but it was like he couldn’t get enough of me.
I didn’t understand that.
There has been a mistake…
It made me nervous. Mistakes weren’t easy to predict, but this was either a mistake, or…
Or he’s a really good liar.
I almost scowled as I closed the distance between us. I wasn’t normally good at sensing lies unless it came to an Alpha’s attraction to me. That was clear cut. I was either the reject they kept around in case there was no one better, or the liability, bound to them in ways they wished I wasn’t.
But Knox wasn’t my scent match, and he had options.
Not only did he seem genuinely curious, but he trusted me, and that was hard to get my head around. If he was lying, why had he left a gun where he knew I could find it?
“You settled in?” he asked, leaning over and placing his book down on the side table. I nodded as he beckoned me onto his lap.
Oh, his lap again?
None of this made sense.
On the bright side, weapons were good at making everything make sense quick-style, so I hugged Bunny-gun close as I slipped over him. My hair tumbled free around my chest, keeping the weapon better hidden.
I glanced out of the broad window as I neared him, catching the low lights on the balcony. Beyond, the landscape was dark enough that I couldn’t make it out.
His touch brushed my waist, and I shivered.
Okay.
This close, I caught another trace of honied bourbon…
Was that… refreshed ?
My chest was tight as I inhaled deeply. The rest of the scents in the room were dulled, but there were definitely traces of ink and antique wood.
I didn’t understand.
Especially not when his huge arms were wrapping around me, and he pulled me against his chest.
“Oh.”
Uh… he was cuddling me already?
The gun pressed against my skin, reminding me of what I had to do, but my hormones all let out a breath of relief.
He was… everywhere, his skin against mine, warm and tingly, sealing cracks and making me want to curl up and rest here forever.
I swallowed a lump in my throat.
We can’t do that, Bunny…
I pouted.
We need answers. What if your scent match finds out?
He’ll never want us…
And what if he needs us to save him?
Putting an end to the cuddles was like ripping out my own heart, but I took a breath and shifted the gun in my grip.
Knox didn’t move as the warm metal pressed against his chin.
I strained to shift away in his arms, finding myself swallowed into a pair of twinkling, caramel eyes.
“Are you going to kill me before I’ve even had a chance to taste you?” he asked, and I could hear his amusement.
I narrowed my eyes, trying to understand. “This thing’s loaded.”
His grin widened. “Is it?”
Okay. He was playing with me.
This is all backwards, Bunny. What did we miss?
My eyes dropped to the gun I had pressed into his flesh.
Was it fake?
I adjusted my finger at the trigger and?—
Wait.
Wait, wait.
We tried it earlier—and the bookshelves had a real life bullet wound, clear as day.
We need him alive to find our scent match.
“You’re not mine.”
“Untrue—unless I imagined five million vanishing from my accounts.”
I scowled. “You’re not my scent match.”
“What gave it away?”
“You were bleeding.”
“You caught my scent through an open wound?” He looked a little impressed.
“Of course I did. Scent matches are everything.”
“Is that right?”
Well. To me, they were. “Don’t test me.”
He chuckled, fingers digging into my hips as I jammed the gun harder against his flesh.
“Let me go,” I snapped. His dumb touch was still making me all tingly. This touch starved shit was useful half the time, and a pain in my ass the other half. Right now, it made me want to curl back up against him.
“What’s the plan, Little Doll?” he asked, holding my gaze with curiosity.
“I’m gonna go get him, and then we’ll decide what to do with you.”
His rumbling growl still echoed amusement as he dragged me close. I didn’t mean to let out a little squeak, but I felt how hard he was beneath me. His package was only one layer of fabric away from all my sensitive Omega parts.
I fisted his hair, irritation sparking at how fucking confusing this was.
Guns were supposed to solve problems, but this one was creating more. I glared at it before tapping it roughly on his chin.
Yup. Definitely real.
And working.
I think he must be the broken one.
“What does that look like—in this make-believe world where you have me at your mercy?”
“I haven’t decided.” It was true.
He was pretty, and I felt a bit sorry for him; I don’t know if his brain was firing on all shotguns.
Was that why he thought he was attracted to me? Things were starting to make a lot more sense.
Could he be as confused about the world as I was?
But we weren’t scent matched, and I’d always been afraid of Alphas who weren’t my mates—they’d see right through me and leave me behind the first chance they got.
But… maybe did he have those same worries?
I could keep him, I supposed.
I’d get my scent match first, then we had some planning to do, not to mention some finding. I’d left?—
“You want to see him?” Knox asked with a grin.
“Who?”
“Rogue.”
My heart all but leapt free of my chest. “M… my scent match?”
Rogue?
That was a perfect name.
His eyes flickered down, brows raised, and I realised I’d lowered the gun in shock. Shoving it back to his chin, I steadied my voice. “Show me.”
I flinched as he reached for the side table, but nodded when I saw he was grabbing his phone. Then he turned it on and tapped the screen a few times.
Finally, he tilted it toward me.
My breath caught, heart twisting as I saw the dim picture on the screen.
I could barely see the Alpha, even squinting, but what I could see was the iron muzzle that glinted in the low light, and the traces of a feral snarl with teeth bared. He was behind a row of bars, fury in his eyes as he gripped them, and I could just make out the short wisps of shaggy silver hair.
“Taken about a week ago. He goes into ruts often. Not very stable, and he’s mine, just like you are.”
I frowned, eyes darting between his.
His?
I mean… I could free him, right? I was the one with the weapon. “Where is he?”
“He lives here.”
That was all I needed. I was pulling back, but Knox’s fingers dug into my hips even as I held the gun in my grip. “There’s just one more thing you should know.”
I paused, eyeing him, pulse still skittering around all nervous-like.
“Your scent match has a… curse.”
“What does that mean?”
“There’s this tiny little device someone jammed into his neck before they handed his keys to me. A bit of an inconvenience, really, since it’s rigged to blow.”
“To what ?”
“Lot of vital structures in that part of the body,” he said, thumb trailing my neck. “Needs a reset on a timer. Every seven days I have to press the button so generously given to me to keep him alive, or…” He minded an explosion with his hand. “No more Rogue.”
I stared at him, lips parted.
Bluff…
Has to be a bluff, Bunny.
But… but what if it wasn’t?
If we kill Knox, and then our scent match dies? Can’t have it.
Can’t fucking have it.
Surely, we’ll never get another one—the universe will know how bad I am…
“Where’s the button?” I demanded, nails digging into his chest as I jammed the gun back into his flesh.
He leaned against the headboard, a lazy smile on his lips. “That’s a secret I would happily take to the grave.”
“You’re lying.”
“Kill me. Kill him, too,” he said with a shrug. “You thought the only leverage I would have on you is that pretty collar around your neck?”
This was wrong… it shouldn’t be this easy for him to win.
Yet his grip closed around the gun, and I wasn’t sure what to do.
“Let go, Little Doll.”
I didn’t want to.
But I wanted to let my scent match die even less…
I scowled as my grip loosened on the gun. He took it from me easily, turning it and brushing it along my cheek.
“Now you have a choice. It’s your first night, and you’ve racked up more debt than Rogue usually does in months. But I’ll allow you to return to your nest. Rest up and start over tomorrow. You’ve got ten seconds before I change my mind.”
I scrambled back, heart racing.
Was he serious ?
This wasn’t like normal Alphas, letting me go—especially not after death threats—and also unlike normal Alphas, I didn’t know if I wanted him to let me go.
No.
Knox couldn’t be trusted.
He’ll use us and get bored and leave us behind.
Not like Rogue…
I’d stumbled only one step from the bed when he spoke again.
“Although…” Knox tapped the tip of the gun against his own cheek as he watched me. “You should know you’re only getting a free pass because your scent match offered to take all the punishment in your place.”
What?
I froze, staring at him.
“He knows I’m here?” My voice was weak.
Knox didn’t answer, watching me.
“He can’t.” I swallowed.
Punishment?
What would that look like?
I’d just jammed a gun at his temple; the punishment wouldn’t be small. Ace hadn’t been big on punishment—well not with me, anyway. I always got the impression he thought offering it might make me think he cared more than he did.
But Dan? What would Dan do if I’d ever pointed a weapon at him?
I shuddered.
Dan was a better gauge. Knox wasn’t fated to me like Ace, and I knew now what game he was playing. Because that’s all this was to him: a game.
If I let Rogue take that kind of punishment for me… My lip trembled. He’d hate me before he even met me.
“Um…” I swallowed, taking a tentative step forward. “I can… I don’t want him taking my punishment.”
Knox’s eyes flashed with delight. “I hoped you'd say that.”
I let out a breath, the world finally making sense again.
This had all been a trap.
Knox was a Dan, simple as that, and I could survive another Dan if I knew my scent match was on the other side. Even if he was stronger looking and more volatile.
I’d closed the distance between us before I realised it, sliding back onto the bed next to him.
How bad was this going to be?
If I kept him in bed, it was less likely to get real nasty. Dan always thought with his dick first.
“I’ll make up for it,” I said.
I could take a thousand punishments before I’d risk my scent match hating me. It was my only chance at love—something better than all of this.
But would he hate me if Knox claimed me, too?
I didn’t know. I just knew if he hurt because of me before we’d met…
We can’t risk it, Bunny…
Taking a breath, I let loose every hold I had on my hormones: the wound tight pieces bound by years and years of loneliness. Alphas loved touch starved Omegas because it made them feel needed. It had been just enough for Ace, who was a god of control, even among Alphas.
I watched as Knox’s pupils blew wide, and then his fist closed around my neck.
“On my lap,” he growled.
Um…
Okay. It hurt a little to set Bunny down on the bedside table, but I made it happen.
I could do this.
I could manage it just like I used to with Dan.
It had been a while since an Alpha had taken what he needed without a care, but I’d dealt with that for like… years, so… Well, it’d be fine.
It will be fine, right, Bunny?
Rogue won’t hate me for being all… all used up.
“Doll.”
My eyes lifted to Knox’s, and his caramel eyes were a storm of lust, but there was something unfamiliar in there… I bit down on my quivering lip and shifted onto his lap again, like he asked.
Just be what he wants, and Rogue won’t have to suffer.
He’ll be proud of you.
He’ll be so proud of us, Bunny.
“You stay right there, beautiful.” Knox’s hand closed around my neck as he set the gun down. I glanced at it, still re-adjusting to the fact that it wasn’t of any use to me anymore. Or him , I guessed.
Then I shivered as he gently nudged my lace panties aside, eyes tracing my body with more reverence than I was used to. My eyes darted at Bunny guiltily. I shouldn’t be liking the attention.
Wrong Alpha, stupid.
“You’re dripping, Little Doll,” he breathed. “So ready for me.”
I bit back my pout, trying not to meet his eyes—I was still wet with slick from the car ride. I let out a whine as he dipped two fingers into me. My nails dug into his forearm as I wriggled against his grip on my neck.
What was he doing?
Punishments weren’t supposed to look like this.
He drew out, circling my clit, and I shuddered, hating the delight in his eyes as he felt more wetness pool at his fingers.
He was moving so slowly that it almost felt… nice, which confused me. He didn’t seem hurried. The only time Dan’s pack had ever used fingers was if they were drunkenly trying to figure out where they were supposed to fit. With Ace, it had been a blur of heats, or the few times I’d managed to convince him to fuck me… Just sex. Unplanned, passionate, furious and hateful, without the slow intensity Knox was offering me right now.
This made my cheeks burn hot.
He pumped his fingers into me, caramel eyes unblinking as he added a third.
“Good girl,” he purred, and I couldn’t contain my whine at the praise. “Lift those hips a little, give me a better view.”
I shifted, lifting my hips before I could stop myself. This was all backwards. He was supposed to pull his dick out and get it over with, but he hadn’t.
To my relief, Knox drew his hand away, and my body sagged as the building heat in my core dissipated.
Only, then he took the gun from beside him, and?—
“Uh…” Hold on.
I struggled, but his fist closed tighter, and his voice was weighted with an Alpha bark. “Still.”
Shit.
I tried to fight it, but by the time I found my strength, he’d shifted the gun between my legs. I jumped as metal brushed the wetness trailing my thighs.
Uh.
Safety?
Was the safety on?
“Eyes on me.”
My nails dug into his chest as he nested the tip of the gun against my entrance.
My breath was tight, a foreign feeling spearing my veins with lava and ice all at the same time.
Nothing about this should be making me react, but I was almost panting.
I struggled against his grip, but he grinned. “Take it like you’ll take my cock.”
A snarl curled my lips as he said that.
Rogue…
“Keep going,” he said.
“It hurts,” I whispered. Not because I believed I would get sympathy, but because I needed to know his response.
“Go slow, Little Doll. I want to see every inch of you take it.”
He shifted it closer, more demanding, and I squeezed my eyes shut, finger fumbling for the corded muscle of his forearm as I tried to do what he said.
The metal felt foreign and strange as I lowered myself down, the edges firm against my walls. I still didn’t know about the safety, yet heat rocketed through my veins every time I considered that.
“Keep going.”
Biting back another whimper, I sank down over the barrel, the unfamiliar hardness stretching me open. It hurt for a moment and I clenched my jaw. I had way more slick than Rogue ever needed to know about as I sank to where I felt the edge of the trigger guard.
“Fuck…” His growl was primal. “So goddamned beautiful with that sweet cunt squeezing the gun you tried to use to save your mate.”
I clenched my teeth, trying to make eye contact with the ceiling.
Dan and his pack had never said nice things. Ace didn’t like me—not really. So, I didn’t know why he was saying this stupid shit.
“Fuck it for me, Doll.”
I let out a breath of shock as he shifted the gun out just a little.
This was all insane.
Why is he fucking me with something that isn’t his dick?
What was the point? Was he a new monster—different from Dan and Ace?
No…
He’d let go of the act soon enough and finish properly. Otherwise, what was the point in this?
Just a power play.
But his fist was tight around my neck, and his glittering eyes held mine without flinching as he adjusted the gun again. I tried to focus, lifting my hips and fighting my distressed moan as it slid out slowly, almost smoothly now.
“What will Rogue say if he saw how desperate you are for me?”
I shook my head despite the slick pooling around the metal. That was so fucking wrong.
Rogue was never gonna want me.
“Stop thinking so hard, and fuck the gun,” Knox growled.
I met his eyes, unsure at that command, but somehow it was easy to listen. My touch starved hormones were flooding the air now, and I had to let them do their job.
I tried to stifle a moan as I lifted my hips up, feeling the weapon shift against me.
Loaded… It’s fucking loaded.
The thought was filled with as much fear as it was something forbidden. This whole thing was uncomfortable, and frightening, and… and something else I couldn’t to quantify as Knox’s fist tightened around my throat.
I don’t think I’d ever been looked at by an Alpha with such reverence. “Give me a show.”
Heat was building in my core, despite how strange the gun felt. I sank over it again, the movement more fluid now. This shouldn’t be working—he wasn’t even getting anything out of this.
Orgasms were painful for broken Omegas like me—even if he didn’t know I was one of those kinds of Omegas—but still.
What was the point?
Just to taunt me?
Or maybe to test me and find out?
Dan would taunt me when I’d get off, telling me it proved the kind of whore I was when I hated him. That’s why it hurt, because it was all wrong, like I was all wrong.
I didn’t want Knox to actually fuck me, but I wanted this even less. This was cruelty, nothing more.
Still, with his skin on mine, the words he kept saying, and the threat of the weapon I was being forced to take, I was fighting more arousal than I’d ever faced.
But just when I didn’t know if I could fight it anymore, the metal was gone. I didn’t get a chance to catch my bearings as he turned us easily, so I was on my back. I tried to throw my weight at him, but he had the chain in his fist. Before I could stop him, he’d looped it over the headboard and dragged it back to his side. I let out a whimper, grabbing at the tightened chain as he picked up the gun again.
“Open your knees,” he told me.
My breathing was heavy, my mind still tangled between threats at the rising warmth in the pit of my stomach, more demanding with every touch of his against my skin.
“If you can’t take your punishment?—”
“I can.” I parted my knees, hating him and the desperate anticipation of what he was going to do next.
I jumped as the tip of the gun returned to my skin, and my back arched as he pressed it into me once more.
“You’re going to cum for me just like that, aren’t you? Little Doll?”
I clenched my teeth as he began to slide the thick metal barrel into me, slow at first but speeding up with each pump. My eyes were fixed on the ceiling, breaths coming faster and faster, and I didn’t notice he let go of the chain until I saw movement.
He was holding his phone.
Wait—“ What are you doing?” I tried to push myself up, but whimpered as he buried the gun as deep as it would go. It was stiff, constantly on the edge of discomfort, and it was hard not to arch my back to make it easier to take.
“Stay still,” he said, drawing it out slowly as he pointed his phone at me, and I heard the click of the camera. “I want a picture of how pretty you are, fighting so hard not to get off while I ruin you.”
Finally, he dropped the phone, free hand closing around my thigh and dragging my legs further open. I squeezed my eyes shut, tiny, pathetic sounds slipping from my chest as he buried the gun back into me.
I was trembling, and nothing made sense.
Not him, or the orgasm I was racing toward. It felt different to anything else I’d ever experienced.
It was gonna be worse.
He was gonna make me hurt, and he wasn’t even gonna get his dick wet.
Knox was officially the worst Alpha I’d ever fucking met.