8. Rusty – Then
eight
Rusty – Then
W hen we reached the frat house, Jacques pushed open the door, and we grunted hellos to the brothers in the main room as we dashed up the stairs to the first level.
We were at the door to our bedroom within seconds. After tumbling through it, we stripped off our outer gear before we all stilled. I looked from Jacques to Travis and back again, suddenly unsure of what I should do. My chest was heaving, my pulse pounding in my veins. I was lightheaded, dizzy with lust. Nerves stole what little confidence I’d built up. When I’d seen Jacques and Travis come in, they tore each other’s clothes off, getting naked as fast as humanly possible. Should I do the same?
Jacques stepped close, crowding my personal space, and I breathed him in. The scent of ozone clung to his skin for hours after he’d been on the ice. But there was something else underlying it that was as smooth as chocolate and rich like beautifully roasted coffee. Travis stood shoulder to shoulder with him. But even though they were taller, it didn’t feel like they weren’t standing over me—not with the way Travis reached for my hand, interlacing our fingers.
“Did you hear us?” Jacques asked quietly, a vulnerability in his voice that I hated hearing.
“Yes,” I admitted and squeezed Travis’s hand to stop him from pulling away. “I wasn’t eavesdropping—at least, I didn’t mean to—but some nights I’ve still been awake when you got home, and on others you woke me up. Last night….” I swallowed and dropped my gaze. “Last night I watched.”
“You just laid there while we fucked?” Jacques asked, shock coloring his tone.
“What should I have done?” I looked to Travis, but he was focused on Jacques.
With his free hand, he reached out and squeezed Jacques’s hip. But Jacques pulled back, turning away from both of us. He ran his fingers through his hair and exhaled heavily, his sigh loud in the silence of the room.
“I’m sorry. I know I betrayed your trust by pretending to be asleep.”
“Are you doing this to get back at us for talking about you?” Jacques asked, then turned to me and continued. “Is it a practical joke?”
“No.” I shook my head and held out my hands, palms up, trying to convince him I was being genuine. I would never do that.
“I’m sorry we spoke about you like that,” Jacques admitted quietly. “We shouldn’t have done that.”
“You don’t need to apologize,” I said. I’d wanted to strip off my clothes and theirs, then make all three of us come. Looked like we needed to talk first.
I sat down on my bed, elbows on my thighs and clasped hands between my knees. I stared at the floor, gathering the courage to open up to them. I’d never get the words out if I had to say it looking in their eyes.
Travis sat next to me, his arm stretched behind him, close enough that it was as if he had his arm around me. Jacques stood, his arms crossed over his chest and his stance wary.
“I’ve never had sex before,” I mumbled. “I’ve never even been kissed. Travis… that was my first kiss.”
“How?” he asked gently with zero judgement in his voice.
Jacques uncrossed his arms and pulled up his chair, sitting opposite me.
Travis added, “You’re gorgeous. Shy, yeah, but….”
I dropped my head into my hands. Talking about this stuff sucked.
Jacques slid his hand up my thigh and squeezed, silently encouraging me. He asked, “Was it because you haven’t been comfortable with anyone else?”
“No. Sort of,” I admitted, a flush creeping up my throat and over my cheeks. “It’s because I’ve never wanted to have sex with anyone except you two. I’ve never even been attracted to anyone until now.” I shrugged, trying to play down the magnitude of the shift inside me.
“Are you asexual?” Travis asked. “I mean, it’s totally fine if you are. I feel even shittier about the way we spoke about you if you are—”
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “I’m still wrapping my head around it. I thought I was broken. For years I convinced myself that I was defective.”
“Hey, you know that’s not true, don’t you?” Jacques asked ducking down so he could try to meet my gaze. “There’s nothing wrong with you.”
“I know that now.” I lifted my face, and when my eyes met his, I sucked in a breath. Gone was the hesitation, and in its place was warmth and concern. Jacques was genuinely worried about me.
I touched Jacques’s hand, and he held still, letting me trace the veins that ran along it. I explained, “Just before I finished high school, I was listening to this podcast by an Australian guy. He said he hadn’t realized he was bisexual until he was in his twenties. His best friend had returned from active service, and Levi and his girlfriend both fell for him.”
Travis hummed, and I turned to see him pump his brows and grin at Jacques. “I acted on it junior year in college.” Travis sobered and added, “But I knew before.”
“I was fifteen, I think,” Jacques contributed. “I had this massive crush on my mom’s best friend, but then we moved, and I haven’t seen her since. A boy on my new team had the same wavy brown hair as her, and I jacked off to him every night for a week before I realized that I probably wasn’t as straight as I’d thought.” He smiled fondly and asked, “Do you want to figure out how you identify, or are you happy without a label?”
“I looked up the website the guy on the podcast talked about, and the closest thing I identified with was asexuality.”
“Okay,” Jacques responded, nodding slowly.
“But now I’m not so sure. I’ve never been repulsed by sex. I just wasn’t interested in doing it myself.” I sucked in a breath and willed my courage not to flee. “Until now.”
Travis gave up the pretense of casually leaning against me and wrapped his arm around me, holding me tight, and I continued, “Now I’m not sure that I’m asexual. Getting to know you both and feeling comfortable with you changed things. I think I might be demi? Maybe I need an emotional connection before I can experience attraction.”
“And you’re attracted to us?” Jacques asked.
“Very,” I breathed, my cheeks heating at my declaration.
He reached out and traced his thumb over my cheekbone. “This blush kills me. Every time.”
My cheeks heated even more, and Jacques’s responding groan was pained.
“What do you want to do with that attraction?” Travis asked, cutting straight to the point. His voice was a rough rasp. He tagged on “If anything,” as if it were an afterthought.
I straightened, not wanting them to doubt me. What I wanted was the one thing I was sure of. I admitted, “I want to fuck you both.”
Travis’s sharp inhale had my pulse spiking, desire flooding my veins.
“Can we start with a kiss?” Jacques asked.
“Please,” I begged.
He leaned in and pressed his lips to mine, soft and sweet. It was chaste and perfect, but I wanted more. I slid my hand high up Travis’s thigh and leaned into Jacques. I swiped my tongue over his bottom lip, and he opened, his tongue sneaking out to meet mine. I tasted him—cinnamon and something else—and groaned in ecstasy. He cupped my cheeks with both hands, holding me reverently, then slid his tongue inside my mouth. I was already addicted.
Jacques shifted forward to sit on the edge of the chair, and tangled our legs together. He used his height to his advantage, leaning over me, and I arched into his touch. His groan of approval sounded deep in his throat, and I gasped, feeling the vibration straight down my spine.
He was kissing me with his whole body, and we weren’t even touching for the most part. It was all consuming. My brain short circuited and need overrode any ability to hold back. I wanted more. I needed it. I was desperate for our bodies to press together, eliminating the space between us. I grasped his sweater and tried to tug him closer, but he stopped, slowing things down again.
Jacques kissed a line across my jaw to my ear. He nuzzled my throat, and the flick of his tongue against my lobe shot tingles straight to my dick. I was hard, achingly so. It was the first time someone’s touch had done that. The first time that I wanted to push past those natural limits that had constrained me in the past.
Travis kissed my nape and shifted so he could lick the column of my neck and suck a mark there. I moaned shamelessly.
“Touch me, please,” I begged.
Travis moved quickly, turning so he was side-on to me, one leg behind my back and the other hooked over my knees. With a finger under my chin, he drew my face to his and crashed his lips to mine.
Jacques moved like water, fluid and gentle, but Travis was like a wildfire roaring through me. He surged forward, pressing himself against me and tangled his fingers in my messy hair. He controlled the angle of our kiss, and his hands were everywhere, touching me with a desperation that mirrored my own.
These men could kiss .
I grasped Jacques’s sweater and tugged, desperate to feel skin on skin. But it was me they started to undress. My glasses went first, Travis handling them gently. My sweater, boots, and socks were torn off haphazardly, then my T-shirt and jeans. I was in a pair of black boxer briefs, while my guys were still fully dressed, but I wasn’t uncomfortable. Their pupils dilated, and a flush spread over Travis’s skin. Jacques’s chest rose and fell in quick succession, as if he couldn’t catch his breath just from looking at me. Warmth spread through my veins, the heat in their eyes scalding me from within. Gooseflesh pricked my skin, and I shivered under their gazes.
“Get naked too,” I demanded, my voice breathy with a harsh rasp. I reached for them.
But Travis slipped in behind Jacques and tugged him out of my grasp before undressing him bit by bit. My mouth watered as I watched every inch of pale skin being revealed. He was as hard as I was, and Travis used those strong hands to taunt and tease Jacques until he was down to his underwear—a low-slung pair of red briefs that would barely cover his package when he was soft and did nothing to hide his erection. Seeing the head of his cock poking out with only part of his shaft covered was a fucking turn-on.
“Want to help me?” Jacques asked as he spun around and gripped Travis’s wrists, pinning them behind his back. Travis went easily, not resisting Jacques’s hold.
I jumped up off the bed and bit my lip, desperate to play. But I didn’t even know where to start—I wanted everything off and now.
I reached for Travis’s belt, slowly undoing it and tugging it through the loops before I dropped it to the floor. I followed the belt down and undid the laces on his boots before helping him out of them. My face was groin height, and I couldn’t resist leaning forward and nuzzling his cock through his clothes. I inhaled deeply and ran my hands up his thick thighs until I reached the button of his jeans. I undid it, eased the zipper down, then tugged his jeans to his knees in a single move. He was in navy blue boxers—short, loose ones that reminded me of rugby shorts. They highlighted his spectacular thighs and did nothing to hide his erection tenting them.
Jacques let go of Travis and stripped him out of his hoodie and T-shirt all at once.
My mouth watered at the sight, and it occurred to me that I knew the difference between someone I found attractive and others who I didn’t, but I’d never experienced this overwhelming need to be close, to touch and taste. Right now, I needed everything.
Before I knew what was happening, they hauled me to my feet and we were sharing a messy three-way kiss, our tongues tangling and hands exploring one another’s bodies. Their skin was smooth except for the thatch of hair on Travis’s chest. I buried my face in it and breathed him in before kissing a line over to his underarm. I nuzzled him there, and Travis’s moan was worthy of a porn star.
We collapsed onto Jacques’s bed, and the press of their bodies against mine shot me to heaven. I couldn’t get enough. I wanted to drive them wild and make them come all at once. Their abs were rock hard, their thick thighs and cocks even more so. I wanted nothing between us. They were like silk-covered stone, and I was a writhing mass of sensation between them. Jacques’s underwear had ridden down, and his cock branded my back and ass cheeks with precum.
The ecstasy built, and I arched back, kissing Jacques as he ran his hands over my chest. “Fuck,” he gasped. “So close.”
“Me too,” I breathed.
I slid my hand down Travis’s belly, and the head of his cock poking out between the buttons on his boxers brushed my palm. His breath caught, and Jacques moaned.
“Touch him,” he encouraged.
I closed my hand around Travis’s dick, and the heat of it scalded me. He was so thick and veiny, and the way he leaked for us was such a fucking turn-on.
“Next time, I want inside you. Your mouths, your asses, I don’t care,” I hissed.
Jacques cried out and stilled behind me, his grip tightening as hot cum splashed on my back. Travis arched in my hold and shouted out, cum pulsing from his dick. I watched in awe as his eyes rolled back and his body twitched.
“Can I touch you?” Jacques asked. “Make you come?”
“Fuck, yes,” I moaned, leaning back against him as he tugged the front of my boxer briefs down and my cock popped free.
He swiped up Travis’s cum and used it as lube, his hand sliding over my aching shaft. It took two strokes before the tingle at the base of my spine washed over me in waves, and I hit the point of no return. Jacques squeezed my cock on the downstroke and curled his hand over my head, swiping my precum and mixing it with Travis’s. The sight of my cock in another man’s hand—Jacques’s hand—with Travis spent and softening right next to me was enough to tip me over the edge. I shouted out and unloaded on Travis’s chest, pulse after pulse painting him. Marking him.
I collapsed forward, Jacques and I landing in a heap on top of Travis. My heart was beating at a rate of knots, and I was floating in a sea of ecstasy. I already wanted to do it again. I wanted everything.
“Fuck,” Jacques half laughed, half groaned. “I want to do that again.”
“Me too,” Travis grunted.
I wasn’t capable of anything other than a moan. I wasn’t a virgin anymore. I’d just had sex. I wanted to experience everything again too. But, for now, I wanted to bask in the closeness of the moment and the way our bodies were still tangled together.
I cracked my eyes open and pondered why my bed was all the way over on the other side of the room. Jacques’s wasn’t big enough to fit all three of us, but I didn’t want to move.
“How the hell am I going to keep both of you a secret?” Jacques mused, nuzzling my nape and rubbing his cum into my skin.
The high I was riding crashed to the ground and I swallowed. “It’s for a shot at the NHL,” I whispered, and Jacques cuddled me tighter. Travis’s breathing evened out, and he pulled me closer, nuzzling into the crook of my neck.
One day there would be out players, but I didn’t blame Jacques wanting to keep his private life private until then. As long as Travis and I got him, it didn’t matter what everyone else thought.