Chapter 4 Vae
Vae
PAST
The boy shoves me. I land heavily on my butt and blink as tears fill my eyes. I’m not sad or hurt. I’m angry. But he’s bigger than I am.
I hate this school and these people.
“My best friends are going to get you for this.”
“They aren’t your friends. They aren’t even your brothers. Look at you; you look nothing like them.”
My cheeks burn, and I try not to look down at my hands, at the darker skin that is from parents unknown.
“You can’t be here at my school. Freak! You don’t even have a mum and dad! You’re a loser!”
I narrow my eyes at the familiar jab. “Yeah, but I’m sure yours would give you back if they could.”
His face goes red, and he pulls his leg back to kick me. It’s going to hurt, but it will absolutely be worth it.
A shadow falls over me. I twist my head just enough to make out the shapes of three shadowed boys.
Even though I can’t see Raynor clearly, he’s so perfect, he lights up my entire world just by being here. His aura is one that I can read without even trying. Mal is like golden sunshine, energy that is always throbbing and moving, while Deacon is the dark, threatening storm on the horizon.
“You’re not picking on my Vae, are you?” A question wrapped in a whole lot of threat.
I love it when he calls me his Vae. It gives me the shivers.
“He says I can’t be here because I don’t have parents,” I mutter. I don’t dare tell them about the slur to my mixed heritage.
Mal helps me up and dusts me off. “Nope. He wouldn’t say that because I know for a fact he doesn’t want to get beaten up by Pan again.”
“Yeah, Deacon would whoop your ass.”
The bully is losing his bravado in the face of my Lost Boys. Especially Deacon, who, while thin and nerdy, has a violent temper and a fearlessness that sees him winning more fights than he loses.
He backs off one step at a time, muttering as he goes.
I grin up at Mal. “Do you have any of those chocolates left?”
Mal brushes his golden hair out of his eyes. “Sure do, come on.”
It doesn’t matter what a thousand bullies say; all that matters to me are Deacon, Mal, and Raynor. Their opinion is the only one that means anything.
PRESENT
Marilyn is an imposing figure with her shoulders pulled back and carrying more command than any of the coaches. I shouldn’t feel this nervous.
She’s also a rare female alpha, and I am a newly awakened omega, so her aura is doing things to me that I don’t understand. Not sexual, but I want to lift my chin and curl up smaller.
Still, I wait until the players leave, ignoring the accusing glare Deacon tosses me as I approach her.
“Do you have a spare minute, Marilyn? It’s important.”
Her nostrils flare, and the polite mask slips as she eyes me with curiosity. She makes a decision quickly, and, with a tiny practiced smile, moves towards me. Her hand rests on my shoulder as she guides me into an office. With extreme grace, she perches on the corner of a desk.
I wish I were a fraction of the woman that she is. I brush my hair behind my ears and move towards the seat but change my mind at the last minute, opting to stand. The words trap themselves in my throat until I want to scream with frustration.
Instead, I take in the modern office, sleek, shiny black desk, the laptop and single photo of a man. An omega, I realise. Hers, the one she lost.
She waits me out.
I appreciate that so much because I really have no idea where to start.
“I have to move out,” I blurt. I rub at my face. “Just as tactful as I was when I told them.”
“You’re moving out? But you and the boys are a unit.” She doesn’t sound upset; in fact, she sounds curious. Maybe she will help them; maybe this alpha will help me.
I shift; my scent gets laced with the honeycomb candy I keep trying to hide and something sweeter, heavier. It takes me a second to recognise my grief.
“That is no longer possible,” I say softly and turn to face her. “You can smell it, can’t you?”
Marilyn dips her head. “Omega.” She says it with such reverence I want to scream.
I press my hand to my chest. “I didn’t want this. Alpha, I just wanted to be with them in whatever way I could. It’s not fair. I would have stayed forever by their sides as a beta. Really, I would have.”
The pain of it hits me again, and I almost double over, trying to breathe through the grief that I’m sure will kill me.
“So, tell them-”
“They only see me as a sister,” I say bitterly and walk to the other side of the office, taking in the old photos of trophies from years long ago.
I dream Mal and Deacon can be in one of these framed photos one day, holding one of those big shiny trophies.
In those dreams, I’m deliriously happy in the stands, screaming their names, with a crowd of thousands.
“I can’t make them knot me or, worse, bond me.
Can you imagine? Stuck with me forever, sucking their hope out of them day by day. ”
All my dreams are going up in ash.
“They’re dating Indy.” My voice comes out rough, aggressive. Flat. The stealer of my dreams, this omega who is so unfit to be by their side.
“Indy?”
“She’s a fan of the team, exquisite, but not a very nice person. Comes to all the games. Die hard member. She’s been dating my boys for the last three months.” My boys, what a slip of the tongue. Her boys. Indy’s boys.
“Oh.”
I cross my arms over my chest defensively. “Look, I just can’t stay there. I’m going to go into heat soon and…”
Her eyes widen and shift around the room. “You need somewhere to stay and alphas to see you through your heat?”
I reluctantly nod. “I have some numbers. But, Marilyn, I’m just letting you know so you can handle the boys-”
“Forget those numbers. I’ve seen some of the options, and I would never send even my worst enemy to them.” She cocks her head to the side. “I can help you.”
The words fall into the room with the power of a Molotov cocktail. Hope explodes up and out, fanned by flames.
“You can?” I blanch. “You mean, like…” I cut off because I actually have no idea how she means.
She laughs, a tinkling chuckle that has me locking my knees so I don’t move closer.
“No, not me personally, but I know an alpha or two. But this will happen at a cost.”
Of course, there’s always a cost. I’m not bitter; it is, after all, practical.
“What’s the price?” I ask warily.
“You want those boys to succeed, right?”
I nod but hate the way her eyes are gleaming. I want them to thrive, to own the world, to be all they can be.
“It’s amazing. I didn’t think an answer would just fall so neatly into my lap, but you-” she points one long, manicured finger at me, “are going to help me shape those Lost Boys into alphas deserving of a spot on the Scented Scorpion lineup.”
I gape at her. “You think I haven’t tried?” She knows our nicknames? I’m not entirely surprised but shocked to hear it.
“Oh, but, this time, you have the full support of the team and my brains behind you. I assume we need to add the little musician to the mix, too? Of course, we do.”
I take a step back as she takes my spot, pacing the office.
“The problem with the Lost Boys isn’t so much that they are aggressive and painful, they are two of the least problematic players, not that it says a lot because the whole team is a walking PR nightmare, but they need to learn some core lessons.
Responsibility, empathy, the team existing outside the three of them, honing those destructive and sulky instincts into something adult. ”
“Okay, but-”
Marilyn reaches the end of the office, whirls and smiles widely at me. It’s a dangerous smile, and I feel a bit like a pawn on a chessboard being moved without my say-so.
“You are going to teach those boys to grow up.”
I scoff and try really hard not to laugh at her.
“They call me Hook. Clearly, the idea of being anything like me is reprehensible. They hate the idea of growing up.”
“Even better. A pirate is one of the sexiest things alive, my love; don’t let their bluff fool you.
You show them how to cook, clean, and be responsible for their own lives, and I will set you up with an apartment and a very trusted alpha friend of mine who will be incredibly discreet but good for your first heat. ”
She reaches out, gripping my hand, no doubt seeing the panic and despair that’s written all over me. She explains everything that just happened in the team meeting. They have to go on dates? The team could disband?
The pressure on me triples, pressing heavily. I feel the weight of all of it.
“Don’t worry, Vae. You can do this. You can save their dreams. I will be right here to help you every step of the way. Truly, you are the only one who will be able to reach them.”
She’s not wrong. My boys don’t trust anyone except each other.
It’s part of their struggle with the team; they don’t connect to anyone outside of our foster family.
With the exception of one person. A young alpha named Henry who Deacon has taken under his wing.
He currently is working as a janitor and doing odd jobs for the Scented Scorpions, but he’s a phenomenal skater, and I know Deacon’s been privately training him late at night.
I know why, too, Deacon sees Henry as himself five years ago.
“If they find out I’m doing this, they will go completely the opposite way.”
Marilyn’s eyes light up. “So, don’t tell them. You’ll do it?”
I don’t see that I have much of a choice. I step away from her and back to the office door.
“Of course, I’ll do it. But you knew that before you said anything,” I say bitterly.
“It will help you.”
“I know, and I should be grateful. I am grateful, but…” My stupid eyes fill with tears, and I blink the room back into focus. “They’re mine.”
God, the pathetic whine that escapes from me almost has me bawling.
“Loss steals your ability to be happy.”
I take a shuddering breath, remembering her loss.
“I am sorry,” I whisper contritely.
“Let’s not focus on our pain. Let’s try to save the Scorpions.” Marilyn pauses. “What did you say the name of their girlfriend is?”