Chapter 26 Deacon #2
“Deacon, please tell me you finally realised what she is?” Henry shouts. “Vae is the one, my brother. She’s the girl for you, how have you not seen that yet?”
I turn to look at Mal. “Is that what we were meant to have realised? But I’m not in love with Vae.”
My protest is weak, and it doesn’t ring true anymore. I stand up, yank my shorts up, and start pacing.
Mal is quiet, observing me with something in his eyes that tells me he’s holding back.
“Are you?” I snap the question.
Mal looks away. “Fact is, I do feel that way. I always have; I just didn’t know it. Exactly what Henry said. And, the fact is, Deacon, the bond and the things you feel towards her are love.”
I nod my head because it’s spinning. A thousand memories cascade one after the other. Our entire lives have been together. At every one of my triumphs and every one of my losses. She’s been at my games, my graduations. She knows what I like and what I hate.
“Let me ask you this, Katz. What does she love above everything?”
“Us and baking. Not cooking, but baking,” I say instantly.
“What is she scared of?”
“Spiders and thunderstorms.”
“What does she want to do with the rest of her life?”
“She wants to run a bakery called Neverland.”
“Do you want to fuck her?”
Do I? It would change everything. “Yes!”
“So you love her?” he fires off.
“Yes,” I fire back and then go absolutely still.
Yes? I do?
I do.
All I can see is Vae. The rose-colored glasses of denial are gone. It’s just me and this yawning pit of honest feelings.
Vae is mine. She’s the one.
I stagger backwards, the wooden seat in front of my locker knocking my knees out from under me. I sit down heavily, in a daze. A daze of Vae.
“My work here is done. I’ll send you the bill.” Henry swaggers out, flicking Mal with a towel he throws into the laundry trolley. “Put that thing away before you put out an eye.”
I just sit there and let it all fall into place. All the everything that I thought was one way is suddenly upside down and another. But it’s like this was the right way the whole time, and I was wrong.
Every single time we hurt her, dismissed her, comes back, slamming me in my face. Every time I took another omega or beta to our beds, flaunted them in front of her. Every missed thank you, every moment of happiness we could have had.
I put my face in my hands and groan.
“You okay, Deacon?”
I lift my head, seeking out Mal. His expression is curiously blank, but he’s dressed.
“Raynor?”
“He’s kinda known about his feelings a lot longer, subconsciously, anyway. It’s why he never fucked the last few girlfriends we had.”
I close my eyes. “I didn’t notice.”
“You weren’t looking. It’s okay, Deacon.”
I hang my head. “I’ve been a lousy alpha. A lousy player and teammate, and, worse, I’ve hurt her.”
A thought slams into my brain.
“What about her?”
Does she hate us? The anxiety balloons in my stomach, spreads up through my chest and sits, heavy and oily, making me nauseous. Would Vae ever forgive us for what we’ve done? I wouldn’t.
“Oh, Deac, I think she’s been in love with us since we were kids. She’s always been ours; we just never saw her. I’ve thought about this a lot, and it makes sense.”
“She wants a family, kids, a life and happiness,” I say to Mal, trying to gauge his reaction.
“Yeah, she does.”
For a moment, I weigh everything, letting the words my heart is screaming into my mind last a lifetime, and then I release them into the world.
“I don’t want her to have that with someone else.”
“Yes, so?”
“We need to step up and give her the life she deserves.” I look at Mal, fear in every part of me. I can’t lose her or them. “I’m not sure I can be what she needs.”
“You’re not going to know unless you try.”
Mal sits beside me, reaches out, and places a hand on my thigh. “If there was only one truth in my life, it’s that the four of us belong together. We are a pack.”
I close my eyes. “We are.”
“And she is willing to forgive us, and we can be better and learn. All she wants is for us to try.”
“All right.” I make a decision and stand up. “Then I need to go see the coach.”
Mal and I get dressed, then go to the office and wait until he shouts for us to come in.
He narrows his eyes and leans back in his chair. “What can I do for the two of you?”
It’s hard to start, but I open my mouth and force the words out. “I need to tell you I’m sorry, Coach. I am very sorry.”
The coach freezes, his lips parting.
“I have behaved in an appalling way, and while I didn’t think I was hurting anyone else, I now understand that my carefree need to enjoy life has been at the expense of my family, pack, team, and the Scorpions.
And especially you, Coach. You could have given up on us.
You could have fired us and replaced us, but you-”
“I see something great in you, Katz, and you as well, Evans. I believe in both of you. But this really is the last chance. No more being late to games or practice. No more slacking off. And no more parties, girlfriends, and drama.”
“Coach, to be honest, I don’t need another. I understand what I need to do, and I’m going to get it done.”
Mal leans against me. “What he said.”
“And what’s this all to do with?” Marilyn asks. “What caused this change of heart?”
Mal looks at her and smiles. “Vae.”
“Vae?” Marilyn looks surprised, but I get the distinct feeling she isn’t and is just hiding her smug satisfaction. “I thought you were dating Indy.”
“We were, but Vae is…” I search for the word. “Ours.”
Marilyn’s lips curl up in a satisfied smile. “Is she now?”
“She is,” I say confidently, but the confidence falters. “But she’s going into her heat soon, and we won’t be here for a few days.”
The coach and Marilyn exchange a meaningful look.
He waves his hand at us. “By all means, go and take care of your omega.”
Coach leans back and chuckles as we pass Marilyn and head for the carpark.
“Is there anything else we need to do?” Mal asks.
I glance at him sharply. “No, why?”
He looks at his phone. “It would appear Vae is close. Really close.”
I stop walking, trying to control my instinctive reaction to rush to her, to panic and mess everything up. “Let’s go to the shop and make sure we have food, supplies, so we don’t have to go anywhere. Raynor is with her?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, tell him to keep a cool cloth on her head and let her nest if she needs to.”
Mal types the words out but keeps looking at me like I’ve grown a second head.
“What?”
“I’m just impressed with you.”
I shake my head. “Shut up. I’m still the same idiot I’ve always been.”
“I know, but with, like, maturity. You’re going to be the sexiest silver fox to ever walk the Earth. Can I call you D-Daddy?”
I stumble. “You cannot.”
“Aww, but you’re so hot when you’re being all responsible and level-headed. Maybe I’ll get you a pirate hat, and you and Vae can play pirate. Some kinky shit I’ve been fantasizing about for years. Would you let her peg you? I can find a hook, and we can give that a try.”
I roll my eyes. “You’re enjoying this.”
“Of course. I’m the baby. I don’t have to be responsible.”
“You do.”
“Nah, everyone expects me to be a little problem.”
I unlock the car and get in, my thoughts returning to Vae. I feel like a new person with a clean slate about to start my life.
“It’s exciting, isn’t it?”
“It’s just Vae, it shouldn’t feel like this, like I want to throw up, and my hands are shaking, and I can’t stop wanting to smile.”
“Yeah, all of that.”
I start the truck and reverse out of the car park.
“What do you think Vae would enjoy?” Mal asks.
“I’ve got an idea. Let’s get the groceries and go to the bakery she loves. We can get her some treats and also grab some nesting materials.”
That thought fills me with fire. Provide my omega nesting materials? My alpha nature roars its approval, demanding I take action now.
The last time we were here shopping, I was an idiot. This time, I ignore all the stares from people and focus on my omega. She is the only person in the world right now who matters.
“Have we got it?”
“Got the essentials. Chocolate, snacks, easy to prepare meals. I want to avoid having delivery people coming to the door. Disinfectant wipes and body wipes, just in case. We’ve got washing powder at home. I think we’re ready.”
By the time we get to the nesting store, I’m purchasing things based on how they feel and trusting my instincts completely.
We end up with seven bags of blankets and pillows and materials. Mal meets me at the car with a massive bag of baked items.
“What did you get?” I ask.
“Pies, pasties, sausage rolls, croissants, cakes, doughnuts, slices. She said a lot of it will keep in the fridge, but use the items on top of the bag first.”
“Have we forgotten anything?” My palms start to sweat.
“It’s going to be okay, Deacon. We’ve got this.”
Yeah, yeah we do. Still, when I look at him as he climbs into the car, he looks nervous.
“I know. Let’s go save Hook.”
Mal whoops, scaring the shit out of me. “We’ve got an omega!”
An older woman starts laughing as she crosses the round. She’s wearing a red and white dress with a straw hat and looks sweet as pie. “Don’t fuck it up.”
I decide that’s a quote to live by.