Chapter 4
Crew
“Give me the phone,” Nathan says. “I need to see Danielle.”
“No, you’re driving.” I shift the phone out of his reach. “Dani, I’ll talk to you later. I love you.”
“I love you, too. Be safe.”
“Always,” I say, even as I turn the phone so she can only see me and the passenger window, not me swatting Nathan’s hand away. “See you soon.”
“Give me the phone,” Nathan insists.
“Stop, asshole! I ended the call.” This was fun to fuck with him until it wasn’t. Now I’m starting to get annoyed. “You’re acting like Isabel when we won’t let her have something that isn’t safe,” I tell him.
“Crew,” Nathan growls. “Call Dani back.”
I sigh, about to give in and call her back because Nathan is stubborn enough to try to call her himself while driving.
But I don’t get a chance.
I don’t know if it’s because all his grabbing and maneuvering in his seat has caused his eyes to drift off the road or whether the roads are just bad, but all of sudden the tires are spinning.
“Oh, shit,” I say, gripping the door and staring through the windshield as the car starts to fishtail. “Nate. Turn the wheel. Turn the wheel!”
“I am! Stop yelling, for fuck’s sake.”
I can’t decide if I want to turn and look at Nathan or stare straight ahead to make sure we don’t go off-road.
In the end, there’s no time for either.
In about two seconds, we’re off the road, being jolted around and bounced on our asses.
Then we’re in a ditch and the car comes to a hard stop.
My head jerks forward and I swear.
Once the car is still I release my breath.
“You okay?” Nathan asks.
I realize his arm is across me, parent-style. Like he was going to personally prevent me from going through the windshield with his fucking forearm.
“I’m fine. You?” I turn and look over at him.
Nathan’s face is pale but he nods. “Yeah,” he says gruffly.
“What the fuck, Boss?” I ask him. “Now what?”
We’re in a ditch in the middle of nowhere Illinois.
Nathan doesn’t say anything.
I’m bent over fishing my phone off the floor when it hits me.
Shit.
His parents died in a car crash.
He was just a kid and he was with them in the accident. He doesn’t talk about it much but it completely changed his life. This had to bring back long buried emotions.
I want to rip him a new asshole and now I can’t because…fuck.
“I’m sorry,” he manages to say. “That was just…reckless.”
It was also his fault but now I can’t even say that.
Okay, maybe it was a little my fault as well. I knew poking at him about Dani having fun solo with Michael would get under his skin. And that showing her flirting with me on the phone was really going to rile him up.
“I’m sorry, too,” I say. “Wrong place, wrong time to mess with you. But we’re both fine. Let’s just forget about it and figure out how to get the hell out of here.”
“I don’t think I can move,” Nathan says. “I think I’m having a heart attack.”
He’s breathing too hard and his hands are still on the steering wheel white knuckling it.
Holy shit, I think he’s having a panic attack.
On the best of days, I’m not exactly a calming force. That’s Michael. That’s Dani.
I don’t know what to do other than to reach out and grip his shoulder and give him a reassuring squeeze. “Hey. You’re not having a heart attack. Just take a deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth.”
It goes to show you how freaked out he must be because he just obeys me without question, inhaling and exhaling slowly. The grip on the steering wheel eases ever so slightly.
“Relax your shoulders and breathe in again.”
His shoulders drop an inch from their current position around his ears.
While he’s breathing, I put the car in park and hit the button to turn off the ignition. I can’t see shit outside so while I’m assuming we’re in a ditch, I can’t guarantee that. We could be dangling on the edge of a mountain incline about to plunge to our death for all I know.
Then I realize there aren’t mountains in Illinois.
I wasn’t exactly a top-notch student but even I know that.
I spent half of high school on a bus driving around the midwest for hockey tournaments. It’s flat here, thank God.
But just in case, I tell Nathan, who is breathing like a motherfucking yoga champ, “We should probably exit the vehicle slowly just in case it’s unstable—
Nathan completely ignores my words of caution.
He springs into action, undoing his seat belt and door and jumping out into a blizzard like the damn car is on fire.
“—and we slide,” I finish.
I sit there, waiting for the car to move but nothing happens.
With a sigh of relief, I shove open the passenger door and climb out into the howling wind, my feet instantly sinking into several feet of snow.
Nathan is bent over, hands on his knees.
I walk around the front awkwardly, snow slapping me in the face as I remind myself that I love my wife and kids and it is my responsibility to get both me and Nathan to Aspen in one fucking piece.
Even if this is Nathan’s fault.
“Get back in the car!” I yell to him, because yelling is the only way to be heard in this bullshit weather. “You’ll freeze to death out here.”
But Nathan shakes his head. “I can’t get back in the car. I need a minute.”
Fuck.
Nathan is wearing a suit. He looks ridiculously out of place standing in snow up to his calves, eyelashes and hair now covered in thick fat flakes.
He is out of place. Nate belongs in his private jet, not in a rental sedan in the middle of a rural snowstorm.
“Look at me,” I tell him, trying to decide if I need gentle parenting or tough love.
We all know in our family that Dani and Michael lean toward gentle parenting. Nathan is just a total pushover. And I tend to be the fuck around and find out dad. If I tell you no and you do it anyway, you gotta live with the consequences.
But in this case, given Nathan’s history, I need a softer touch.
I also rely heavily on humor, but that isn’t going to work either.
I just need to be a friend.
Gripping the lapels of Nathan’s jacket and giving him a little shake, I say, “We’re both fine. This is no big deal. Minor setback. You can get in the passenger seat. I’m going to get us out of this, no worries.”
Nathan frowns. “Oh, I’m worried.”
“Don’t be,” I say with a nonchalance I don’t totally feel. I release his jacket and pat his chest with a nice bracing thump. “It’s all under control.”
Nathan opens his mouth.
“Ah. No arguing.”
To my shock, he actually just shakes his head and tromps around the front of the car, using the holes I already made to walk in.
The door slams shut behind him and I’m left alone in what weather guys probably call a snow squall.
I’m not wearing a coat and my fingers are numb but I manage to maneuver them over my phone screen and work my magic.
A minute later, I hop in the driver’s side of the car and slam the door shut.
Given that the car is wedged in some kind of ditch, I don’t think I can drive us out of it. It’s not deep, but the snow is wet and we won’t get any traction without some kind of board to brace the tires.
I think it’s safe to turn the car back on though so I do that so we have heat while we wait.
Nathan sticks his hands in front of the heater. “Now what? It’s the middle of the night and my assistant isn’t answering my texts.”
“Because it’s the middle of the night.” I shake my head. “Leave that poor guy alone to sleep, for fuck’s sake.”
“Well, it’s either that or you can push this car out of the ditch.”
Nathan sounds salty. More like himself.
It’s a relief to see he has color back in his cheeks and his usual surly attitude.
He kind of freaked me the fuck out.
But that’s what is cool about our friendship and our family. We’re all in this together, the four of us and the kids. We’re there for each other, no matter what, even when we’re vulnerable. Hell, the most when we’re vulnerable.
“I’m too pretty for manual labor,” I tell him. “Besides, I need my fingers to do dirty things to our wife.” I waggle my fingers as proof.
Nathan snorts. “Danielle is getting all the attention she needs from Michael right now.”
“Are you jealous?” I ask him, my tone serious. I am curious. I don’t get jealous but Nathan is built different. “It’s okay if you are. It’s not always easy sharing.”
“No, not really. It’s just…I want to always be there for Danielle. And for Isabel and Oliver. And you. And Michael.”
“You are.”
“But then that need pushes me to do stupid things. Like fly to Decatur when I should have taken us straight to Aspen.”
“I get it.” I do. “You want alone time with Dani and time with the four of us and time with the kids and us and somehow you want it all at the same time.”
He nods. “I think that’s it. Which is impossible, not to mention insane.”
“You went a long time without a family beyond your grandparents. I think that’s normal.” I give him a second but when he doesn’t respond, I ask, “Want to talk about it? The car accident?”
He knows I mean the one with his parents.
But he shakes his head. “No. Not really. I’m okay, seriously. It just…brought up some unexpected loss.”
“I understand. I’m sorry you went through that.”
“Thanks.” Nathan taps my thigh with his fist. “I appreciate you.”
“Same.” Then I grin. “Is this where we finally share a passionate kiss?”
“Fuck off. I already see you naked on a regular basis. That’s going to have to be enough.
” But Nathan fights a smile. Eventually he gives in and laughs.
“Jesus. So how do we get out of here, McNeill? I’ve only seen two cars pass us on the highway the whole time we’ve been here.
Do we just call a tow truck in the morning and limp back to Chicago? ”
“And deny ourselves two days alone with Dani and Michael? Hell, no. I thought you were made of stronger stuff.”
Then a rapid fire honking rings out and headlights cut through the storm as a van pulls over.
“Crew? Crew McNeill?” we hear someone shout through a window that’s being rolled down.
“We’re saved,” I announce.
“Who the fuck is that?” How do they know your name?”
“Grab your stuff,” I tell him. “I did a livestream with our location and asked if anyone was in the area and could give us a ride.”
Nathan’s jaw drops. “That’s…”
“Genius?” I ask.
“Psychotic.”
“But very fucking effective.”
“Don’t you ever watch Dateline? You gave total strangers our location. They could easily murder us.”
“No one is going to murder you. Me maybe. But not you.”
“Why is that?”
“Because if you watch that show then you know they always say the victim lights up a room. You can’t ever be accused of lighting up a room.”
“I legitimately hate you.”
“You’ve already told me you love me today. No take backs.” I reach into the back seat and grab my duffel bag.
“Crew.” Nathan grinds my name out through gritted teeth.
“Oh, look,” I tell him, as someone appears in front of the headlights. It’s a woman, dressed in a long black gown. “It’s a nun. We’re totally safe.”